| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 6:48:03 AM | I met a girl a week ago while I was working out, and she gave me her number. She said she was new to the area and had few friends, and that she only worked, worked out, and read. She was really nervous and repeatedly mocked herself (a lot), saying things like "I had better stop, you won't like me!". She also mentioned a lot of family issues, mainly dealing with her father.
We messaged each other for a few days, and then we went out on Wednesday. Throughout the date, her words and actions indicated that she was having a great time, and she messaged me after saying it was great. I called her Friday to make plans, and she told me she would call Saturday via text message, but I am yet to hear from her. I called her yesterday and left a simple message telling her I had fun and asked her if she was free Wednesday, and I am yet to get a response.
Provided she has not lost her phone or become extremely busy, she is not contacting me for a reason. Any idea what that would be? I plan to stop contacting her until at least the weekend, unless she contacts me, of course. We do work out at the same gym, so perhaps we will run into one another. I just wanted a variety of input on this topic, as I am not familiar with this kind of situation. Thanks. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 7:07:14 AM | OP: "Any idea what that would be?" Huh? How are we suppose to know?! lol
Be patient and wait until she calls you back, and if she doesn't throw that fishing pole back in the pond.
Best,
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 7:08:20 AM | Chill out .. She may have a family emergency or may have lost her phone.
Of course there may be another guy that is trying to get her and she may be spending time with him.
Whatever the case , just be yourself..
If she finds you to be the guy she wants , she will let you know.
Always be there for her unless you suspect she is just using you.
If you start feeling that way then make yourself scarce and find another girl. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 7:11:34 AM | I know you won't "know", lol; I just want possible explanations. This is its own unique case, but I figured that others on this site may have had similar experiences and could relate!
The girl was really cool, and would be an awesome friend at worst. My pole is still in the pond, though. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 7:12:44 AM | OP, you've already left her a message. The ball is in her court whether she wants to pass or shoot. If you see her in the gym, just smile at her. That will indicate no hard feelings and afford her the chance to say something if she's inclined to. JMO.
~ds~ | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 7:17:05 AM | | Well said, I agree with that plan. Have you had a similar experience with a female? If she is not busy or unavailable, would a girl really avoid someone she likes, depending on her personality? That does not seem possible in my mind. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 7:46:15 AM | OP: "I know you won't "know", lol; I just want possible explanations. This is its own unique case, but I figured that others on this site may have had similar experiences and could relate!
The girl was really cool, and would be an awesome friend at worst. My pole is still in the pond, though. "
Ok - lets see; she may have met someone else that she digs more or there was a tragedy in her family that is putting her dating on hold....in other words the possibilities are endless. The only thing that would make any sense is to advice you to be patient. If you have called/texted already that is all you can do.
When you meet someone that you like it becomes a tad bit cumbersome playing the "waiting game", but you have no control over others or whatever is taking place in their lives.
Glad to hear your fishing pole is in the waters................ | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 8:04:18 AM | Thanks to all for your responses, I truly appreciate it. I always assume that when I meet a new girl I like, it will go smoothly and work out perfectly, despite evidence to the contrary. It is so difficult to take another person's point of view in certain situations, and this is one of them. It is much easier to fall into the "What is wrong with me?" frame of mind.
And DavidSauvignon, good self-deprecating humor, but I am sure that is not the case! | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 8:13:24 AM | "call her on thursday or the weekend like you planned"
STOP CALLING THE GIRL. You called a few times and left messages, That's enough, if she is in anyway interested she will get back to you. If you don't hear back from her move on. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 8:14:20 AM | If she is not busy or unavailable, would a girl really avoid someone she likes, depending on her personality? That does not seem possible in my mind.
People (not just women) do it all the time. It's the coward's way out.
If she doesn't call back to schedule a date, move on.
Krys | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 9:11:23 AM | | Really? When I see something I want, I go for it, no questions asked. It is odd to think people would run from what they want, unless they were afraid. Thanks for the advice. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 9:39:03 AM | Whoa, Whoa, Whoa... you're operating under the notion she likes you, at least as much as you like her. That may not be the case. She may have had a nice enough time on the date, but maybe not a nice enough time to see you again. If that's the case, she's not running from what she wants, she's just avoiding someone she doesn't want.
Krys | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 9:50:27 AM | | I understand that what you are saying, but I am 99.99999% certain she liked me. She would have to be the greatest actress on Earth to pull off a performance like that. I have had this occur with a couple girls before, and there were subtle signs that it was coming. This was not the same. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/7/2008 5:40:09 PM | Maybe she doesn't like you that much - it's a possibility.
Maybe she is not single.
Maybe she is busy.
Maybe she has enough on her plate.
Maybe she is worried about her father.
Maybe she doesn't want a relationship.
Maybe she is just tired.
Maybe.
If she is not busy or unavailable, would a girl really avoid someone she likes, depending on her personality? No, she wouldn't, unless she was a master of self-sabotage or had huge self-esteem issues.
If I were you, I would leave her alone. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/8/2008 1:53:41 PM | | Apparently I was played. Research has shown she recently started dating a doctor. I lost out to a better short-term option. At least I know. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/8/2008 4:00:45 PM | Sorry to hear that, Frank....
But you know there are other fishies...and the ocean is endless...so throw that pole back in...and just enjoy life! | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/8/2008 7:03:39 PM | You've mentioned that she was really nervous and repeatedly mocked herself, and that she had a really great time throughout the date.
She's probably insecure of herself, and that she wasn't sure how to respond to your encouraging feedback since, assumingly so, she has had family issues.
If so, how about calling her again and give her a due date. At least, if she didn't call because she's not interested, you would have some closure. And if she did, good for you. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/9/2008 11:49:30 AM | | Thanks for the kind words. That is easy enough to do. I am not fond of rejection, but it fuels me to be the best I can be. Unfornuately, it does not appear that others notice my work. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/9/2008 12:06:10 PM | Shes not really interested.
Think about it for a min. If you were really into someone would you not call or at least give a courtesy call if you wanted to see them again but had plans?
You didn't impress her enough on the first date.
Try this out, if you want to get a second date, be as aggressive as possible on the first date, like being romantic and stuff. what do you got to lose?
Girls think with emotion not logic, so if you have a interesting conversation thats not going to be enough to get them to go on a second date, you have to make sparks fly. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/9/2008 12:13:22 PM | my prediction she will call you or go out with you if she doesn't have any better options or is bored.
I hate to say this but this is pretty much true, you will never have her 100% interested until you have sex.
Before sex you have to do the chasing and put yourself out there to be rejected, put off etc.. After sex she has to do the chasing and try to get you to stay in the relationship.
Thats why its best to lay it on heavy on the first date, because you have nothing to lose, if she thinks you came on too strong so what no second date, if you didn't make a impression then no date, but if you did make an impression from being aggressive then you Will get a second date. Basically think its always on, the sexual attraction aggressiveness, women like that, they like being chased, wanted, desired it boost their ego. | |
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| What do you think about this situation?
Posted: 10/17/2008 5:30:16 AM |
But you know there are other fishies...and the ocean is endless...so throw that pole back in...and just enjoy life!
That was the problem...OP threw the pole in, when he should have held onto the pole, and just threw in the hook.  | |
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