| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/14/2008 1:02:16 PM | | I go out to lunch, to bars, etc alone all the time, and I usually bring a book with me. It's a nice way to relax and unwind after work. I don't go to 'hook up' (ewww) but if I happened to strike up a conversation with someone, cool. Granted, I tend to be a more solitary person and enjoy time alone (introvert, can't help it), and I'm certain not lonely. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/14/2008 10:33:50 PM | I see this often actually. I do not find it odd. Guys do it, why shouldn't women be allowed too.
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 9:07:38 AM | Men are going to think what they are going to think reguardless. I would suggest that if you don't feel confortable, see if there are any other single ladies or a group that you can join in with. Otherwise, it is a borish oaf that won't accept your expressed desire to be left alone, or even don't want his particular company, regardless of the reason why you are there.
It maybe a man's world, but it is a woman's game. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 9:18:11 AM | ^^^That's the truth.
I think if you feel uncomfortable it's more that it's something you're not used to than who's thinking what. Just do it till it feels natural, like everything else.
And tell the men who approach you that you CAN be alone and STILL want to be left alone. If you're sitting at the bar it won't get past the staff if that guy doesn't like your answer. They'll deal with him. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 1:09:56 PM | just go out and do it. -you will be proud of yourself later for taking the initiative. -who cares what anyone is thinking (they probibly wern't thinking anything anyway) you dont have to stay long the first time -just scope the place out, have a drink, and listen to the entertainment. keep your ears perked up and learn the names of the bartenders/servers.  | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 1:27:26 PM | This is a good question and one that I've had on my mind recently. I would love to go out even by myself, even to a bar. I've held back because I don't want to be hit on by some stupid casanova. That's not what I'm interested in. At best, I thought I might be able to make a new friend or two (I moved here a year ago and I still don't know anyone outside work).
But yes, it's kept me back. I always seem to attract the hump and dump crowd because I have that sort of an 'easy mark' face. =(
The bringing a book idea is a good one. That way your intentions are clear, you are there to relax and unwind not be a bar star. It's a good conversation starter too, someone who is also a fan of what you are reading might comment on it, and then the ice is broken, and maybe you've made a new friend (based on a book, not on a hookup). | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 3:15:53 PM | oh boy! Reading a book at a bar. I have actually seen someone do this and had to laugh inside. IMO sometimes you need to stop and think "do these two activities match?". Think about it. Reading a book makes you look intelligent. Drinking beer makes you dumber and dumber the more you drink. I don't know but it looks to me like the two don't match.
And not everyone that is solo at the bar is looking for one night stands. Some of us are actually looking for someone to hang out with. Not all of us have single friends or work in corporate offices filled with office buddies to hang out with, hence the reason why we go out to bars alone. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 5:35:52 PM | OP it was taboo in our family ...pretty sure i havent walked in 1 alone unless there was some1 to meet me.....
(enter a bar alone ) eeeek....
but was considering messaging females around my age my city see if they'd mind keeping me company im sure some are feeling the same ......
(get to swap notes on jerks in net sites ...look out losers its comming!)
love toget back to a bit of living but its just as lonely as staying home...... | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/15/2008 5:46:23 PM | i like to go and get a drink once in awhile and i go by myself when i have to | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/17/2008 9:11:55 PM | | I wouldn't think anything about it at all. Hell, I doubt I'd even notice. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/17/2008 10:24:30 PM | It`s amazing to me that we are suppose to be equal in all other ways, finances , responsibility etc., but some guys ( and worse yet, women)still think we can`t walk into a bar alone and order a burger and beer. Maybe we should be like the Middle East and segregate it to be proper. Oh, that `s right, we are fighting for unfair treatment to women over there. Silly me!Maybe we need to look at our own views on the home front before we start invading to give freedoms to the women over there. I love the intellect of some of the fishes! Astounding!
While we`re at it, anyone out there pro- burka`s for American women? May as well, seeing we aren`t supposed to do things in public unescorted. GEEEEEEZ! | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/18/2008 6:14:45 AM |
(enter a bar alone ) eeeek....
love toget back to a bit of living but its just as lonely as staying home......
It's been my observation that women with this kind of mindset( women don't do anything alone) are the ones that end up in "desperation" "better than nothing" relationships/marriages.
I'm not suggesting that "bars" are the only place to make friends/meet dating prospects...if you have problems with smoke/noise/recovering from alcohol addiction, they probably are OOTQ(out of the question). But then you have to look for other options to get out and "live", and you have to be willing to at least get started by going ALONE.
Cindy O | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/18/2008 10:56:24 AM | | I do it all the time... if there is a band that I want to see, I am not going to stay home just because my friends don't want to go out. Then again, I always run into people that I know when I go out. However, if there was a bar I wanted to check out, or a band that I wanted to see at a new place and none of my friends wanted to go - I would definitely go by myself so that I didn't miss out on a good time. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/18/2008 11:27:23 AM | I don't go out all the time alone, but sometimes I want to go and no one is available to go with me. I love to dance so I go to the local bar, grab a drink, find a spot for my jacket and drink an dthen either watch others dancing or I go out and dance a bit myseslf. It IS socially acceptable for a strong confident woman to dance by herself, at least where I go and ocassionally I end up with a dancing partner for the evening out of it.
It's your life and only you can live it!
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/18/2008 2:13:55 PM | I dunno if it's "acceptable" or not, but who cares?
Would you even give the time of day to someone who told you they think it's unacceptable? Or someone who eases their own sense of "I could never do that" wussiness by telling you that going to a bar on your own makes you appear desperate? | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/18/2008 4:55:01 PM | I think its fine when women go into bars alone. Its such a double standard when guys can do it and women can't because the assumption is made that they are tramps merely out to pickup men (and even if that were the case, who gives a rat's ass) . Thats the type of mindset you would expect to find in a muslim nation, not here.
I go into bars alone a lot because I'll be out and just feel like a beer. Instead of organizing a posse for a night out I'll just drop in. If there is a nice girl there I'll chat her up. Why should a woman be ill advised to do the same.
Go for it girls!! | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/18/2008 5:05:43 PM | | I don't see why a woman cannot go alone to a bar? Why should any of us here judge anybody else for what they want to do? I go out alone and my reason is not to get drunk or layed but to get out and be entertained sometimes, so what is wrong with a lady doing the same? None in my opinion | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/19/2008 2:22:15 AM | I my self always thought that darts and pool would be good activities when going to a bar alone. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/19/2008 4:28:22 AM | JustJohn, your view of women going out alone to a bar is sad. Girlfriend, I am 35 years old and I have been going out alone since I was 21. I go out alone, I travel alone, and yes...I go to bars alone. When you go out alone, you have even more fun...since you end up meeting people, men and women, old and young, instead of staying in your immediate circle. Going to a bar alone, or anywhere alone, shows that you are independent, and confident, and you do not need a man or a woman to be happy and to have a good time. Trust me, people are very attracted to confident women. The few men who are not attracted to confident women...they have issues in themselves and you do not want them anyway! If you are a people person, I say GO FOR IT! Go to the bar alone!  | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/19/2008 9:02:04 AM | | I wouldn't go to a bar alone. Unless you want that kind of attention from men...............and I don't. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/19/2008 9:39:20 AM | I know there are some really closed minded people that think if a woman is at a bar by herself, it is really odd.. or she is trying to meet men.
Personally.. Most of my friends have children. I have a ton of acquantences (sp), though not that many good friends. My good friends, have children. Trying to coordinate to go out, doesn't always work.
Once in a while, I will go up to the bar by myself. Stay for a nice drink or two, and be on my way. I really don't care if someone thinks I am there for the wrong reason... If I had a bad day.. I am going to end it with a nice drink. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/19/2008 9:39:27 AM | I go to the bar alone all the time.. and I don't get "that kind of attention" from men.
I've found that you don't get attention if you don't ask for it. | |
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| Women going to bars alone
Posted: 10/19/2008 10:14:28 AM | I go to bars alone all the time. I usually go to places kinda low key like applebees bar or tgi fridays bar. I have overherd a tgi friday manager whispering about me once like i was a lonely old spinster or something. I stopped going there because of that.
I am not sad or lonely. I go to bars alone for I like to have some "alone time" in my life. Have a beer, watch the big screen tv and unwind after a crappy day at work. I actually enjoy going to a bar alone rather than other people. Knowing i have to drive myself i drink less and don't overdo it. It is my way to relax. If a man approaches me I usually blow them off. LOL | |
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