| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 7:32:58 AM | My heart is my home, on that we must agree,
to wear it on a sleeve, to never want to leave.
From beans to dancing, from fruit to prancing,
I think I need some air, no memories to compare.
I suggested once, some slight begging twice. . . .
 | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 7:44:44 AM | I suggested once, some slight begging twice. . . .
Just trying to break the proverbial ice,,,,
All of this feels like a simulation
POF is over stimulation
What will it take to make you be nice?
 | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 8:12:53 AM | What will it take to make you be nice?
To just be ourselves, that is the price;
At ease, to explore, to find out more;
To always repect the other, to never be a chore.
The best muffin cannot compare. . .
| |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 9:27:38 AM | The best muffin cannot compare. . .
If I want to look good in my underwear.
I admit I eat sparse
Cause I want a small arse
I just hate it when rude people stare.  | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 11:59:11 AM | I just hate it when rude people stare,
they do not know me, how can they care?
scars almost healed, spasms almost gone,
contagious fairly cleared, quarrentine was wrong.
the school zone ban has been lifted,
I now am simply gifted !!
I really want to dance. . . . | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 1:21:04 PM | I really want to dance. . . .
under any circumstance
In a little black dress
with stockings of mesh
Could I persuade you to give it a chance? | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 1:23:39 PM | I really wanted to dance
with the boy with a bulge in his pants
others thought it a sock
and truly did mock
My failure at finding romance | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 1:42:47 PM | She had me at the word Hi,
Oh how the time does fly.
At first we went to see,
A movie, romanticly..
A whirlwind spin for two,
Right before I said I do.
But ten years and one kid later,
I realized I really do hate her.
Then two sharks friendly with the wife,
Helped her take my kid, car, and my life.
The moral I learned that day?
..sometimes it pays to be gay. | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/18/2008 2:17:44 PM | sometimes it pays to be gay
in a "prostitute/street walking" way
it may be abhorrent
but you can't pay the rent
because of the alimony
(al-i-mo-nay) | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/19/2008 12:54:39 PM | A tutor who tooted the flute
tried to teach two young tooters to toot
said the two to the tutor:
"Is it harder to toot,
or to tutor two tooters to toot?" | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/19/2008 4:33:50 PM | or to tutor two tooters to toot?"
At this point, it probably is moot.
The one switched to trombone,
the other one was now so alone.
He took up on drugs for the high
they did not part friends, bye,bye!
"The beauty in the sky you see". . . | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/19/2008 9:30:48 PM | A trusting young woman named Treadwell
Believed that she knew Uncle Fred well;
But he tossed her in bed
On top of the spread,
And it seems that this maid was misled well.
(William K. Alsop) | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/19/2008 9:39:29 PM | The beauty in the sky you see
green grassy meadows are lovely
deep oceans blue
things look brand new
Thanks to Hi Def cable T.V. | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/19/2008 9:42:16 PM | http://www.limericks.org/pentatette/whatis.htm
What is a Limerick?
To be a Limerick, a verse MUST have:
Five lines
Lines one, two, and five MUST each have exactly three metric feet
Lines three and four MUST each have exactly two metric feet
The metric feet MUST be anapests ( da da DUM ) although the leading foot of each line may be an iamb ( da DUM) and the last foot of each line may have a trailing unaccented syllable ( da da DUM da). The classic Limerick is consistent in the use of iambs and trailing unaccented syllables, but this is not mandatory in recreational Limericks.
Lines one, two, and five MUST rhyme
Lines three and four MUST rhyme
A good Limerick will have a clever, unanticipated punch line as line five
A good Limerick will not be insipid or pointless
A good Limerick often has puns, word play, eccentric spelling, or some other witty feature
Any nonsense poem that lacks five lines, thirteen metric feet, or the aabba rhyme pattern is simply not a Limerick. It might be a sing-song or a la-de-da, but it's not a Limerick.
This is a Limerick, sound it out:
There ONCE was an OLD man from WHEEL-ing
Who HAD a pe-CUL-i-ar FEEL-ing
Said the SIGN on the DOOR
Please don't SPIT on the FLOOR —
He JUMPED up and SPAT on the CEIL-ing.
If you can't sound out the da-da-DUMs, trash it. | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/19/2008 10:46:00 PM | Thanks for the enlightenment.
Pretty much killed this thread though, we were having fun while it lasted.
Have a Great Day !!
D.
| |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/20/2008 12:34:03 AM | With snorkeler, I wholly agree.
This thread is for limericks, you see.
It's not only rhyming
But specific timing
And unlike haiku, it's funny.
Rock on.
~m
| |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/20/2008 6:35:31 AM | On Plenty Of Fish: a Jokes Forum.
The thread: "Limericks." We adore 'em!
Some people don't know
The way words oughtta flow,
So as for these people, ignore 'em!
On POF there is a forum
Where poetry is the decorum.
The people come here
To laugh off their rear.
You put poetry here and you bore'em!
There's limericks here as a thread,
Some people post poems instead.
Let's give them the gaff,
Cuz I came here to laugh
And they're driving me out of my head!
Thank you, I'll be here all week. Try the prime rib and don't forget to tip your waitress!
~m (from The Limerick Police) | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/20/2008 8:03:58 AM | On POF looking for a date
not searching for my special soul mate
I ended up here
sitting on my fat rear
researching the "Limerick" till 'twas late | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/20/2008 1:52:03 PM | A young schizophrenic named Struther,
Who learned of the death of his Brother,
Said, "I know that its bad,
But I don't feel too sad.
After all, I still have each other."
There was a young man from Timbuktu
Whose limericks stopped at line two. | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/20/2008 7:14:06 PM | There was a young fellow named perkin
Who was always jerkin his gherkin
His father said perkin
Stop jerkin your gherkin
Your gherkins fer ferkin not jerkin
(both stolen err........... borrowed)
A young engineer name of Paul
Was equipped with an octagonal ball
The square of his weight
Times his pecker, plus eight
Is his phone number, give him a call
| |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/20/2008 7:41:53 PM | there was a man named MrD4thee
and a couple named gravygirl you see
but the silly comments
put them out of the sense
what a sad world now it will be | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/21/2008 6:26:54 AM | Now get out of my damn country
you unbalance my ying, yang and chi
the mood that I seek
I find only in sleep
my feet planted in bed like a tree | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/21/2008 9:02:39 AM | My feet planted in bed like a tree
But the work week is waiting for me!
So I gave boss a call,
Told him "I had a fall!
I am flat on my back, can't you see?" | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/21/2008 9:20:55 AM | I am flat on my back can't you see?
Only leaving my bed, just to pee!
(and to find the remote-
eat ice cream and bloat)
playing hooky at home? that'd be ME | |
|
| Start or finish a limerick
Posted: 10/21/2008 10:19:03 AM | Playing hooky at home, that'd be me.
I'm shirking my job blatantly.
Too cold to go out
So I'll stay here and pout.
My boss can give my work to thee.
| |
|
Home
login 
