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Posted: 10/26/2008 3:13:15 PM | last one's a "Zing of the day!"
Unable to message Classy, I pray.
When in doubt, do not pout,
Instead give a shout
So sorry that Blank and Snorky were in the way!! | |
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Posted: 10/26/2008 3:29:04 PM | Are the carpet and drapes both the same?
She asked me without any shame.
Now let it be said
That if I shaved my head...
No wait, never mind, you're too tame.
Neeners. | |
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Posted: 10/26/2008 7:39:42 PM | Mr. Blank, to me, is far too kind
the perfect words are hard to find
that last one from "Class"
kicked me in the A-ss
Left me in the dirt far behind | |
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Posted: 10/27/2008 9:12:48 PM | A lim'rick and pun do compete
For the heart of a verbal aesthete
A lim'rick is fun
But they say that the bun
Is the lowest extant form of wheat!
A certain young lady with class- | |
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Posted: 10/27/2008 9:44:43 PM | A certain young lady with class
Was too fond of her looking glass
She thought she had beauty
And was fond of her booty
She was extremely deluded,alas | |
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Posted: 10/28/2008 7:08:07 AM | She was extremely deluded,alas
she'd prayed for a booty at mass
she wanted a "bubble"
so she could cause trouble
All she got was one big fat ole a*ss | |
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Posted: 10/28/2008 2:16:07 PM | All she got was one big fat ole a*ss
Paid extra at the buffet, poor lass
Time to find a 'suiter
She had trouble near the 'puter
She was half full, not empty, her hour- glass. | |
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Posted: 11/3/2008 4:53:48 AM | Goblins and ghosts are now gone
Turkey feast soon comes along
After that it's St. Nick
with his "up-chimney" trick
Then we all sing that Auld Lang Syne song
It makes me feel old just to think,
about New Years. I don't want to drink
I've seen the years pass
not much sand in the glass
Time sure does go by in a blink | |
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Posted: 11/3/2008 5:08:59 PM | Time sure does go by in a blink!
Next Sunday's my Birthday *wink wink*
So tomorrow I'll be
Bound for ol' Flori-dee!
Snorkeler, you'll hear toasting! *clink clink*
With my Best Friend I'm spending the day
In a most un-old-lady-like way:
On a long Harley Run
On her Dad's bike, how fun!
And I get my first tattoo, OH YAY!
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Posted: 11/3/2008 5:26:20 PM | For you? first tattoo? OH NO WAY!
No ink on you yet? To this day?
I thought you a "biker"
Not back seat hitch-hiker
Choose wisely, what you get will stay! | |
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Posted: 11/3/2008 6:08:04 PM | What is love exactly, anyone pray tell,
I've yet to find it in all sincerity what hell.
You think you have found it and bang its gone,
Is there really any love or has it all gone.
I search in vain for it day after day,
But the bloomin thing never comes my way.
So I stand in a queue waiting for my bus,
with not a care in the world making no fuss.
Maybe I'll strike lucky as a bus comes my way,
Chance will be a fine thing thats all I can say.
For like my bus which had just gone,
So has the love and I have none. | |
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Posted: 11/3/2008 6:13:59 PM | We do things one way in this joint
And while I hate to disappoint
A limerick's five lines
And a specific time
ITT: Mark misses the point. | |
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Posted: 11/3/2008 6:14:58 PM | PAClassyLady
May I extend a birthday wish for you,
I'm impressed with the leg thingy you can do.
Wrap it around your neck like a scarf,
Oh I'm impressed not half.
My only problem is I am so far away,
I wish I were closer so you could hear me say.
But I'm not so, I will have to shout
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Mark xx | |
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Posted: 11/4/2008 1:51:16 AM |
For you? first tattoo? OH NO WAY!
No ink on you yet? To this day?
I thought you a "biker"
Not back seat hitch-hiker
Choose wisely, what you get will stay!
A "biker" I am in my mind.
But being realistic I find
I was always too shy,
Too embarassed to try
To have needles and my skin combined.
Where on my pale skin, wasn't sure,
For the spot must be very demure.
But scars, freckles, what's worse?
Pimples, stretch marks, a curse!
My fish-belly white skin's not so pure.
I will not put a tat on my b00bs!
I'd look like the old hippie chick rubes.
Nor the front of my neck
Or my thigh, what the heck!
And nothing down by my pee-yewbs.
I want something that I alone chose
To show myself. But please, no rose!
No skull, hip patch, heart,
Because it's my art.
And I will not remove any clothes.
"Choose wisely," your words I will heed.
It's permanent, that is agreed.
I have thought this one out
I have not any doubt
My voices say this one I need.
But me psycho? That's just not the case.
(Says that devilish grin on her face.)
One unique, just for me.
Not like youngsters you see
Noncomforming all over the place.
My best friend (on this site, "tattoued")
Has some. Other people's I've viewed.
"Born to Ride" and all that
Isn't my type of tat.
Nekkid ladies? Some ink is just crude!
But of characters out there, stands one.
I'm devoted, I want him, bar none.
A small blue "Happy Bunny"
Straight-jacketed (funny!)
On my sallow skin, he'll be fun!
Just in case your cur-ee-ousity
Wants to know where to find him on me
He'll be on my right calf
So I'll show him and laugh
And I'll keep all of my modesty!
I'm not teenage, I'm 50 years old.
At my age I'll treat it like gold!
I'll be proud that I got it.
If "allowed" or I'm not it
Is just that my mom can't be told.
So there is the tale of my tat.
There it is. That's all folks! That is that.
If you want to know more
It will be quite a chore
But my inbox is where I'll be at.
Poet Mark, I so humbly thank ye.
But this thread is for limericks only.
Your poems have grace
This just isn't the place.
Please send poems to me privately! | |
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Posted: 11/4/2008 6:31:48 AM | A tattoo is pretty hardcore
I don't have one as yet, but the lore
from my tattooed friends' lips
says like po-tay-to chips:
Once you have one, you always want more. | |
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Posted: 11/4/2008 6:35:43 AM | Classy Lady lives up to her name
she it tops in this here ryhming game
the bunny sounds funny
And calfs better than tummy
'Cause it can't sag and start to look lame!
Have a great time on your trip
I'm sure you'll have fun-you're a Pip!
Don't take wooden nickles
Stay safe on those cycles (sickles)
 drink some but don't smoke or do "dip" | |
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Posted: 11/5/2008 12:27:05 PM | drink some but don't smoke or do "dip"
I think Snorkeler shoots from the hip
To drink without the other
Is like kissing ur brother
I mean Really lets all get a grip | |
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Posted: 11/5/2008 7:35:03 PM | I mean really, lets all get a grip
These rhythms run at quite a clip
You two are so cool!
rhyming verses, you RULE!
teasingly on the tongue they do trip
Realvike from up north you do hail.
On crystal clear lakes you may sail
Ever heard of Vermillion?
Just one of a zillion
We catch northern Pike and drink ale
It's north just a bit and then west
I go with my Sis for a rest
the cabin is clean
the view is serene
It's the airfare that I just detest | |
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Posted: 11/6/2008 11:05:15 PM | Its the airfare that I just detest.
Show me my seat, I need rest.
Please bring me a scotch.
Is there a movie to watch?
Free headphones. Sweet, that's the best. | |
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Posted: 11/6/2008 11:11:00 PM | At the end of a day of abuse
A stiff drink is the relief I choose
My family's thinkin'
It's a problem with drinkin'
And they're right: I'm all out of booze. | |
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Posted: 11/7/2008 11:16:11 AM | And they're right: I'm all out of booze
can you guess why? here are some clues:
some friends that were here
had run out of beer
and where hopping mad, like kangaroos
So I opened up my private stash
they drank it all up - then smoked hash!
they were wreckin' the place
falling down on there face
So I threw 'em out and took their cash | |
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Posted: 11/7/2008 2:25:48 PM | So I threw 'em out and took their cash
but they came back while i was smoking some hash
they started to attack
they wanted the cash back
so i started to run like the flash | |
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Posted: 11/7/2008 6:38:18 PM | I had started to run like the flash
twas a veritable 50 yard dash
they were in hot pursuit
they all wanted the loot
and I winked at them with my eyelash
A cop pulled his gun and yelled "HALT"
"It looks like a plan to assault,
this nice citizen,
a pedestrian
I will soon find out who is at fault!"
He took us all down to the station
I stashed the hash - no hesitation
down the back of his pants
when I asked him to dance
He thought I was an abomination!
when the booking sergeant asked him why
he brought us in , we told a lie
"We were practicing sprinting!"
Then we started hinting
that maybe the cop might be high.....
So I get to tell you this tale
elevated to the holy grail
you need a big top
to out smart a cop
'cause that trick won't work if you're male | |
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Posted: 11/7/2008 8:26:38 PM | I started to run like the flash
With my feet the spuds I did mash
But the butter and cream
Stained my new jeans
So I stripped, and burnt them to ash
______
There once was a girl from Balboa... | |
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Posted: 11/8/2008 1:03:23 AM | There one was a girl from balboa
she knew how to suck and to blow-a
she was good with her throat
but she looked like a goat
maeby she will graze and i wont have to mow-a | |
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