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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 10:18:42 AM | I rarely post in the forums....sex, or otherwise. I'm very shy and meek and seem to have great difficulty expressing myself with the written word. I think I will begin practicing at home and hopefully, someday, I can muster up some courage and start posting. Until then, just know I am lurking and stalking all y'all. 
~ds~ | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 10:25:18 AM | If it weren't for you and a handful of regular posters here, the forums would be too tame and boring and candy coated. You are honest and if they don't like it they can all flawk off. What gets me is....why are they reading in this forum? It tells me they are no different than you, yet they have a holier than though attitude. I like your posts because you are honest and not phoney. Years and years ago women were taught not to express but to suppress their feelings towards sex. We have come a long way since then...thank goodness! How else are the people to know whether certain things are common, normal, kinky, weird, acceptable, treatable, behavorable, likeable and so on. Keep being you.             | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 11:51:16 AM | I like the fact that there are a variety of contributors. Vouyers, cynics, intellects, etc., make these forums well rounded.
I love the fact that you can decide when you've had enough; and, when it's time to attribute your personal experiences, sexual escapades, you can do so (at your own risk). Some people are brave enough to throw their opinions around, and throw caution to the wind.
In some cases, very deep and loving threads are made to provoke conversation; others, just to see who's daring enough to put themselves on a limb. I, for one, am very thankful for ladies like MysticalM, Afashionlady, OneMoreTimeWithFeeling and Ms. Micki, and gentlemen like windlover, lennielion, and Gangster Kitten , who make it worthwhile to participate...no matter if we are allies or opponents to the threads or posts we're participating in.
Danz | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 11:55:11 AM | | Lol i have had a few interesting comments ...... but i welcome good n bad comments .... people are entitled to their opinion , i am entitled to my block button !!! | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 11:57:13 AM | Victorian attitudes about sex abound here at the pond! Yes, this has probably hampered me in regards to using this site to date. Yet I'm realistic enough to understand that there's less of a 2% chance that I'll actually meet anyone off of POF for anything other than friendship. So logically, this attitude frees me to spout whatever drivel that I believe. While there's not been a backlash from the pond (irrate IM's or mails), I do believe that IF there was a man that was interested enough to read my posts before contact, I'm happy with all that I've shared from my life and would hope that my honest and candid posts give him a very clear picture of the person I truly am, supplementing my profile description. So if they choose to label me a slut, so be it. I embrace my sexuality, and know that it is just one aspect to who I am. If that's all that they wish to focus on, pity them. While I've responded to many different topics here at the forums, those are just the tip of the iceberg that makes me unique.
Experiencing negativaty from others isn't something that bothers me, nor does it influence what I choose to share and say. I know what I've done, understand what I'm capable of, and live my life accordingly. Others' opinions of me be damned. So message away.... It'll be good for a chuckle later!
And OP? Your posts are wonderful. Don't change them because of small minds in a very large pond!  There are some that actually look forward to someone being completely honest! | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 11:59:04 AM | | We're all adults. I maintain a bit of anonymity due to my profession, and I'm not as vocal as many... but I believe that discourse is healthy. Why judge someone on it? | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 12:06:46 PM | I haven't read all the other responses yet, but here's mine.
I learned recently that I'll get what I want if I'm honest and just ask. Haven't been active on the forums very long so not much mail yet, but here are my thoughts on these if they should come along.
Hookup is not what I'm looking for {delete}
You don't want a woman who is honest and will talk about your physical relationship {delete}
Not sure if I can receive mail from women, but if my talking helps someone else, great {reply thanks...}
I don't care what other women on an internet forum think of my five minutes of typing. That's like reading the 3 paragraphs on the dust jacket and deciding that Tolstoy wrote trash. You get the idea.... {delete} | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 12:44:57 PM | We all judge so it is a great way of judging people .. like I say in my profile .. all my favourites are people who I have gained and received respect from in this wrestling ring of words.
Whether or not I agree with someone is fabulous I love passion, it means, YOU ARE ALIVE.
As for personal discussions about someone's intimate life and preferences I believe the only way intimacy occurs is in privacy and when women describe in detail on these forums about their sex lives many men will see that as an invitation .. I realise that it is not .. but as I keep saying men and women do not think the same.
I have read some responses from woman on this forum,particularly the sex forums and already know by the statements that they make .. that they just invited themselves into a perverse and unwanted chat .. I could see it coming. I blocked someone from contacting me when I first began on POF who lives about 20 minutes away from where I am and knew who I was and where I was and where I worked .. which I found very scary , I never met him in my life.. scary... anyhow he is someone who starts threads on this forum to get his rocks off .. seriously so anyone that wants to respond with very personal information should be aware that the viewer or the OP may not be of sound mind and little mind. <-- alot of em are just getting their jollies and the entertainment may have dangerous consequences.
The forums have been a marvelous glimpse into the spirits and personalities, the brilliance and the humor of many people whom I admire deeply from their cyber renditions ... even though most times I waiver from the "norm"<--said lightly .. I love them ... especially my adversaries of distinct and insightfully acute rebuttals to my rants... you make me feel what all need, to be very, very ALIVE.
I think the OP is a gal who can handle herself, although if someone contacts anyone here personally and you have a "feeling" and their words creep you out as you read between the lines I wouldn't hesitate to report that as even a cyber trail could be necessary as no one is immune to the possibility of written abuse going personal to becoming much more. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 12:49:11 PM | | Ms Micki, I've only had one negative response and it was from someone I would say had issues far greater than my candid responses and honesty. I personally would rather be known for consistence and candidness than not... if someone doesn't like it, oh well....Life goes on! | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 12:51:21 PM | | I havent gotten any really negative messages because of stuff I've posted(yet).I however did notice as soon as I started posting I stopped getting messages from people.So I donno what the deal is | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 12:57:25 PM | ^^I agree, howbigisyourlove. There is an inherent risk attached to writing sexually explicit posts, especially for women.
I read the sex forums here as if they are letters to Playboy or something. They are entertaining, to say the least. Problem for me is: too much information. Do I really want to know about how a man likes his penis sucked? Do I really need to know?
At the risk of sounding like a big prude, it's a turn off for me. I wouldn't date a guy who posts very explicitly here. I might read his posts with a sort of voyeuristic fascination, but I wouldn't go out with him.
It's like sending a dirty email out to the world, imo. Some of the men who post here: who needs to sleep with them? I already know how they like it, with whom they like it, what parts they like the most, which are their favourite sexual positions - and how desperately horny they are.
Yes, it's judgemental. Yes, I sound like a hypocrite (I read but won't post). But...it's the truth - from my perspective.
As far as women posting, well I'm not interested in women sexually, so I don't take the same perspective as I do with the men.
Again - I stress this is only my opinion. There have been plenty of others who have written how they admire and welcome these sexually explicit posts and see them as a form of honesty. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 1:12:20 PM | The forums and profiles are just a glimpse of what a person truly is.........
If any man finds what I write in the forums as an invitation to be rude in my email box it speaks more about him than it does me. Though I don't give graphic detail in the forums I am very open. I do think somethings are left for more of a private conversation........but the way the gossip mill is in this pond, someone is going to write about your conversation anyway........LOL | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 6:41:06 PM | | I get hookup messages but no hate. I love your posts because you just tell it like it is. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 7:09:28 PM | It depends on what I've chosen to post in that week. I won't even mention the specific threads that spawned the worst e-mails; it seems that certain words evoke a Pavlovian response among the least evolved of the POF dwellers.
Sometimes I don't think people even read WHAT I've written, just what topic I've responded to.
I rarely write anything personal about my own experiences, but without fail when I respond negatively to someone's "are nurses really hotter?" or something equally inane, the reply is, "Well, you're the one writing in all the sex forums!"
I also post in the ask a girl, humor, dating, and local forums.
Oh, well. Delete, block, and keep on posting. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 8:28:17 PM | I dont believe in sending messages to women just because they post in a forum like this and are honest about certian things. Nor do I believe they are any less of a lady because they post what they post. We are all human. Every guy in there brother will try or do anything just because they read something a woman might participate in. Plain wrong in my opinion. We are adults this is a forum for this type of topic. My real question is do all or most women that dont post on these forums are they just as playful for a lighter term in real life outside the forums. I would have to guess yes but sometimes I have to really think about it. Some women like attention and it does not take much to get it when the topic of sex comes up. I still and refuse to think bad or that any woman or all the women that post are sl*ts or what ever some people might say. Many things can be learned here and I dont mean how some body particularly might like something. I am talking in general where someone can say I thought I was the only one who thought like that while they are reading something simalar to the way they think.
I think anyone guys or women included but mostly guys that think wow I am going for a hook up look at what she has posted is plain brain dead as if he cant understand what the topic is. Sure once and a while there is something funny that comes along. You can foreget this guy messaging women about what they post about I commend them for being real people. I once had a personal question about myself and wrote to a woman poster who I knew would be of some help to me but it was not to try to hook up with her, and you know what she was able to help me out. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 9:10:19 PM | Men....do you truly believe a woman is a "promiscuous slut" because she is willing to be honest and straightforward in the discussions here?
I don't like the term promiscuous slut. That to me seems to imply cheating. If a woman enjoys sex she is normal and should not be labeled. If she wants to talk about sex I admire that and respect it. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 9:38:02 PM | I've received some interest from men due to my forum posts, but not much, even though I tend to be pretty open and frank in the sex forums as well. If my honesty in my posts, about sex, is too much for a guy to handle, oh well. That's his deal, not mine. His insecurities, not mine. It doesn't mean I'm "sleeping around" just because I'm open about sex. It just means I'm open about it and it's not taboo for me to talk about.
To me, if a guy is uncomfortable with certain posts I've made about sexual topics in here, then we wouldn't be a good match anyway, because when it comes to sex, I like everything out in the open. (no pun intended)
I've read and enjoyed your posts in this forum, so if some men read your posts, and "can't handle" how open you are, that's their problem. Their loss.
Too many people are sexually frustrated these days, which is why being more open in this area, is so important. There is also still so much ignorance about sex in general (which still kind of shocks me, but what do I expect in a society that's cutting funding for sex ed in high school.) That tells me that forums like these are important, if for nothing else, to pass on correct sexual information alone. For example, threads concerning STDs, date rape, etc. It all, needs to be talked about. When it comes to sex, ignorance is not bliss. It's simply, ignorance.
I like your honesty and bluntness in your posts. I wish there was more of that, in our every day lives. It would making dating, so much easier. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 9:39:44 PM | | Nope, haven't received any feedback whatsoever regarding postings in forums but then, i've only been active in the forums for a couple of months.... so ask me again in a few years. My answer may be different. :P | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 10:02:46 PM | Your attention, Everyone!!
Due to the nature of this thread, and some very shady people acting in cowardice, MsMicki was handed a ban of 23 days from posting.
She has asked me to represent her, in thanking all of you for your kind and loving words. It's a little unfortunate that some people do not understand the concept of free speech, but...this to shall pass.
I hope that we can continue to enjoy the forums, without making complete pigs of ourselves. Let's try to respect the opportunity to converse with one another. And, remember that we have feelings that don't want to be trampled, when we are trampling others.
Danz | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 10:06:11 PM | | I mean in all honesty look at how you pose in your pics that should sum it up why guys are leaveing you nasty messages. | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/30/2009 10:44:43 PM | MsMicki mostly I get guys telling me they like what I wrote regardless of which forum it's in. However I did have one guy tell me that after reading through some of my posts he really didn't think it was appropriate for me to be telling the world what I thought about certain "sexual" things. He basically thought it was wrong and proceeded to tell me that he wouldn't even consider dating someone that shared that sort of information with others.
I told him I am an open person and an adult. If I wasn't comfortable with talking about things then I wouldn't. I never said I wanted to date the guy - he was majorly fugly!!! | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/31/2009 2:32:13 AM |
Due to the nature of this thread, and some very shady people acting in cowardice, MsMicki was handed a ban of 23 days from posting.
WTH??? To me the only possible reason for banning someone would be if that person threatened someone else. Oh, wait, never mind. Since MsMicki is open and honest, she is a threat. I forgot, liars and cowards don't like people like her.  | |
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| discussing sex in the forums
Posted: 1/31/2009 2:59:08 AM | Yes, those of us who love sex and are comfortable with talking about it are labelled bad or sl#tty. Funny thing is that we are only saying things that they are thinking or currently doing but can not say without feeling guilt or shame. When they read or hear someone get detailed they take offense so as to somehow put themselves on a higher moral ground. Meanwhile the whole time they are probably masterbating as they compose their trash letter to you. Weird hey?
I guess some may feel that this place is not the place to discuss sexual things but why then are they in this particular forum reading honest and frank comments of a sexual nature? If it so offends them they have the opportunity to avoid this cateogory. | |
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