| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 9:14:52 AM | | added pleasure never killed anyone that i know of. toys do not replace a man, they are jsut different. A toy does not in any way take the place of a man. it is impossible and men need to relaize this. If this was the case then women would not marry becuase they have a toy. Now how lame would that be? not to mention there are so many things men can do that a toy cannot.. kissing is one. moaning is another. carrassing your body is another. same goes for user of the toy. A toy is jsut added pleasure. I see nohting wrong with it. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 12:08:49 PM | Beats me. I love using toys on a woman. The woman I've been with loved me using toys on them.
If a guy objects I believe he's got a weak ego and is afraid of being 'outdone' by a piece of machinery.  | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 12:43:10 PM | How would the women out there feel if the man they were with pulled out a rubber vagina and started to have sex with that instead of her?
I think that'd be interesting, actually I always wanted to see that. I'm not so all about myself that I'd be threatened by it. WTF? It's inanimate - how can it bother you?
I think more men should have one on the shelf in case of emergencies. It'd take the edge off between relationships, that's for sure (for men who can't get laid while single). Maybe it would cut down on the webcam violations. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 12:47:18 PM |
I think that'd be interesting, actually I always wanted to see that. I'm not so all about myself that I'd be threatened by it. WTF? It's inanimate - how can it bother you?
I think more men should have one on the shelf in case of emergencies. It'd take the edge off between relationships, that's for sure (for men who can't get laid while single). Maybe it would cut down on the webcam violations.
Now that would be interesting - mutual masturbation using sex toys.
One of the posters above said it best - its like having your own porno scene right in front of you. I'll never understand how a guy or woman, for that matter, might be upset with their partner using a toy. I love to watch, its the voyeur in me coming out, I suppose. | |
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Jr2324
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Joined: 11/16/2008
Msg: 155 | |
| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 1:22:25 PM | in my past realtionships my partners had asked me about the use of sex toys and i always said n, however when i was with my ex, ill admit we did use a few toys but not all the time, and it was an enjoyment for both of us, but it had to be agreed by both of us and there is no way u can change someones mind on it.
I now work in a shop that sells sex toys, and most of the guys that come in ask us about the toys as their partners have sent them in or they want to experiment to "spice things up".
toys is a taboo subject, and from experience in the shop, men will either love it or they will hate is as they dont want to be made to feel as though they are useless in bed.
im all for the use of toys but it must be agreed by both partners.
Why not try a****ring, its small and discreet and this will not only give u pleasure but he will also get enjoyment from it too | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 1:27:05 PM | How would the women out there feel if the man they were with pulled out a rubber vagina and started to have sex with that instead of her?
did anyone hear me mention a dildo to take the place of his penis? I have siad i dont use them. so if im not replacing his penis with a dildo how can you possible compare and say a rubber vagina. Im not asking to use a rubber penis | |
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Jr2324
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Joined: 11/16/2008
Msg: 157 | |
| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 1:34:10 PM | clearly most people assume that all toys are dildos
well they aint, there are many things u can use and they dont need to be dildos
there is great things out there called "bullets" n they are mainly used for simulation on the clit for her pleasure and also as i meantioned before penis rings that mearly vibrate for both partners u dont need to have a dildo they are mearly preference | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 1:36:17 PM |
why is it that some men get angry if the woman wants to add toys during a night of lovemaking?
To some men, it implies that "he" is not enough for you. I'm not saying that it's right or wrong, but you should understand the implications of introducing another "lover" into your bed.
Try turning the situation around and see if you would be comfortable if he needed something else besides you to get off. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 1:50:17 PM |
Try turning the situation around and see if you would be comfortable if he needed something else besides you to get off.
or just mentioning another woman's name, I think she would box up all her toys and be on her way,, even though the guy might have been talking about his blow up doll, Barbie.. Boys and their toys.....LOL no wonder why the divorce rate is up,, way to many inanimate objects in the bed room...
If a woman wants toys,, I'm Ok with it,, but the fist time she calls out Oh dildo F-me hard,, or says your the best rabbit,, I'd have to bow out.. lower my head in shame and go see a shrink, replaced by a toy, who would think it would be possible..
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 1:53:23 PM | if he needed something else besides you to get off.
The catch word there is "needed". Frankly, if a toy replaces my man, then something needs to be discussed. However, some women AND men have problems and toys can help people with this.
Watch some educational sex shows - they introduce toys in a "pleasant" manner.
And yes, toys are NOT just dildos!
I dated a man who was all for toys (and yes he had his own too!), but he never "needed" to use them on me. What's more interesting is that I used toys before him for several years as I was single. I never became reliant on the toys and there is NO way a toy can replace a person's touch, more especially if they know what they are both doing with their partner.
People need to educate themselves more. They also need to discuss these things before becoming intimate.
It's fine that a man would not allow toys, but he should not expect to date or marry a certain type of woman then. Of course I'm not talking about a toy crazed person here either. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 2:20:10 PM | I think toys are hawt in the bedroom. As an accessory to spice things up of course, not as a replacement for your partner. I personally would be happy to buy my partner (if I had one... *cough*) a "rubber vagina", or an Aneros, or whatever boy toy struck his fancy, as long as he let me watch him playing with it.
Except maybe the blow-up dolls. Those are scary looking!  Maybe if there were a non-scary-looking Dutch wife that didn't give me the creeps, I'd love to watch him fvck it. My own personal porno, starring my favorite person in the world... Hell yeah! 
Watching a man get himself off is a major turn-on for me... I love to hear him moan, watch the expression on his face, observe where he touches himself, and how, and for how long. I love to watch him shoot his load. It's a beautiful compliment when someone trusts you enough to share that much of themselves with you... if they are willing to be this intimate, why should a toy ruin that?
OP's husband needs to get a grip! He's missing out on something that could be a wonderful experience! | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 3:18:38 PM |
seems to me he would wnat to help me anyway he could since he knows I have not had an orgasm with him since we married two weeks ago.
Just curious. You didn't know this would be an issue before you were married? | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 3:26:54 PM |
How would the women out there feel if the man they were with pulled out a rubber vagina and started to have sex with that instead of her?
That sounds kinda hot. I might have to run that one by the wife... 
Btw, one idea I just had was if you just started using the vibrator while he was doing you. Figure out a position where you can use the vibrator and have sex at the same time (I can think of a few right off the top of my head). At the very least, you will get him to talk about it. You can then take the opportunity to explain that if he could make his wanker vibrate at 120 cycles a second, the vibrator would be moot. But since he can't, and it does, why not watch me cum while we are doing it for a change. It could be fun, no? | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 3:29:20 PM | kitten, As others have mentioned previously, some men feel threatened by what is new to them ...and especially when toys, and not the GI Joe variety, enter into their 'sexual arena'.
Of course, if you feel as though you need one or more of such inanimate or battery-powered devices to achieve your own satisfaction in the same arena, you might be the one w/ the bigger problem. IMO: Toys should be an option, but not one always needed or taken. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 4:27:14 PM | Kittenhere, I think you need to talk to your husband and explain your body to him. It sound like he is not sure how a woman's body works. Quickies are good for him, but the pay off for you comes on Saturday evening. You need to explain to him, you have no problem with grabbing a quick one, but when you both have the time to give to serious romance, then it is all about you. That is what give and take is all about. Explain, men are like light switches and women are toaster ovens, in other words men are hot very quickly and it takes a while for women to warm up to the occasion. So, if you are willing to give him, quick satisfaction, then ocassionally, he needs to take a step back and slow down, so you can catch up. I truly think if he takes his time with you, making it very romantic and uses his body, (hands and mouth) as well, he could probably bring you to a climax without entering you. Once you have achieved your orgasim, then let him come into you and I will bet, you will hit another one before or as he does.
It sound to me, like you are always grabbing quickies, hense the reason for the toy, you are just trying to get there as he does. If, you slow down occasionally, you will get what you are looking for and so will he, when he realizes he is the one that had you squirmin and screamin, like a crazy woman. If he loves you as you say, then he will be willing to put a little time into making your sex life wonderful.
Good Luck
Rose
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 5:42:45 PM | I have read that there are many women who don't orgasm vaginally, through intercourse alone. They need stimulation of the clitoris in order to acheive an orgasm.
If you've explained this to your husband, I think he should be willing to satisfy you in any way he can. If he's against using toys, has he performed oral sex on you? Or manual stimulation? You should be enjoying lovemaking just as much as he is. If he doesn't see it that way, I'm afraid you probably have a big problem on your hands. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 6:31:14 PM |
PS. I read your post somewhere, about you discussing the topic of sex with our daughter, (as in education) more men should do that,, good for you,,
Thanks, RDC. Parents do try to pass along what they have learned to their kids, always trying to protect them from the major traps, at least.
But, I gotta say that I've gotten mixed reviews from people on that advice.
However, I was named father of the year by acclamation of the 20-something guys in Oklahoma. Lol. Seems my daughter told some of her guy friends, and they told their friends, etc. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 8:18:10 PM | Where oh where is the man who was explaining about working over the g spot when y'a need him????
Just for the sake of discussion, I normally am well-satisfied by men of reasonable talents.
But, I do hear my sisters when they say they need STIMULATION.
If you can provide that, go ahead.
By any means necessary.
:) | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/12/2008 9:36:19 PM |
But, I gotta say that I've gotten mixed reviews from people on that advice.
Any parent, mom or dad, who does this deserves a kudos in my book. You hear many adults commenting about communication between couples, but many parents lack the courage to talk to their kids about sex. | |
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| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/13/2008 9:34:54 AM | | Guys that object to toys are (in my experience) either insecure in thier ability to please a woman and/or selfish and not concerned about what makes the woman meet her goal. I know I can't be with a man who is not comfortable with getting toys involved in bed. I am not trying to replace him, just to enhance the experience and give him a little help. It can sometimes take a lot for me to reach the big O and not many guys have the staying power or attention span to get me there on his own. | |
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spkit
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Joined: 11/11/2008
Msg: 174 | |
| men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/13/2008 1:15:43 PM | | Are these the same men that look at porn or do other things to satisfy their sexual needs? If so, how lame. I agree with the post about it being my own real porn. I like the real thing and some toys just make it more fun. Nothing worse than sex becoming boring. | |
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