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 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 26
dating foreignersPage 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
Well that all depends on where your from. If its somewhere cold forget about it. If its some nice, im open to offers. lol
 dv8ter2525
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 27
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/24/2008 4:49:20 PM
In the states. Well I am on the road mostly, so I tend to go from one climate to the next... But it is never boring.... lol
 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 28
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/24/2008 4:54:52 PM
Alright, you got yourself a deal. Now well just have to negotiate the terms lol
 dv8ter2525
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 29
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/24/2008 4:57:57 PM
Hehe.... I am sure it is not much different there, than it is here.
 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 30
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/24/2008 5:01:07 PM
lol true. There is one difference though. Its 1 am here and im up for college in a few hours. Take it easy my man.
 dv8ter2525
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 31
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/24/2008 5:03:11 PM
You too. 8pm here.... Well in Atlanta, Georgia. Where I am at this moment...
 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 32
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/25/2008 2:04:47 AM
Cool. Id like to go to the States one day. A proper holiday, travel from place to place for a year or two and see the real America not just the tourist traps.
 stoutje
Joined: 1/6/2006
Msg: 33
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dating foreigners
Posted: 11/25/2008 7:21:24 PM
hello i think dating a foreigerner is a litle differend then dating somebody from your own country .. for the last 24 years in have been living in canada ,but i have notice there is some kind of culture differend between people from differend countries .. special the way we think about certian things ..etc
 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 34
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/26/2008 10:13:07 AM

hello i think dating a foreigerner is a litle differend then dating somebody from your own country .. for the last 24 years in have been living in canada ,but i have notice there is some kind of culture differend between people from differend countries .. special the way we think about certian things ..etc


That what turns me on about the idea of dating foreigners. Im open to new cultures, customs etc etc, it would be different to what Ive become used to.
 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 35
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/26/2008 10:28:48 AM
Out of interest what foreign male/ female would you be most likely to date???

My preferrence would be Scottish, Dutch or English, their accents are just so sexy.
 caramelspice
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 36
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dating foreigners
Posted: 11/27/2008 6:36:32 AM
well fabric i gusee the sound of sweet nothings being whispered wud do the trick :)
 fabric25
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 37
dating foreigners
Posted: 11/27/2008 10:24:12 AM
Oh yes. They would be very sexy whispers lol
 friendsnchats
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 38
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/7/2008 2:39:06 PM
Well some people are quite xenophobic but not all, There are many inter racial relationships in Ireland, it really depends on the person and the circumstance.

I'm engaged to a foreigner, granted he's Italian but the culture is completly different, He wants to live in the med and i want to live with snow, go figure!!
 caramelspice
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 39
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dating foreigners
Posted: 12/12/2008 12:46:09 PM
yes u right miss
it all boils down to personal choice an sumone excepting u for who u are
;)but at the same time a happy compromise always helps
 Foxfalk
Joined: 5/12/2008
Msg: 40
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/12/2008 5:20:58 PM

so many complaints about not meeting a decent guy ,about not seeing genuine ppl how about giving sum of us foreign blokes a chance atleast chat to us before deleting our mails ,what i want sum input on is why most irish women tend to be biased on skin color an what dont they like about foreign men ?


Maybe the problem is that you’re a racist from the reverse side pleading racism to cover up for your own failings.

The problem colour here is most likely BROWN but nothing to do with your skin and more to do with the fact you're a shithead who makes racist generalisations about Irish women.
 caramelspice
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 41
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dating foreigners
Posted: 12/18/2008 3:44:09 PM
so wat are the failings fox ,i have been brought up in a racially biased country south africa so i know wat i am blabbing about ,its not generalisation when its been proven ,internet dating is a hard way to start dating and alot of ladies shy away from meeting all i been asking was wat would make a foreign bloke more appealing ?
 carlall
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 42
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/18/2008 4:15:53 PM
i dated a foreignor i will admit there were alot of times when his friends would call and i would have to leave because the would be talkin their language and i had no idea what they were saying. It was very annoying
 caramelspice
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 43
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dating foreigners
Posted: 12/26/2008 12:34:53 PM
caroline
that is unacceptable behave an plain rude of that guy u were seeing ,i have seen that happen before with unrelated ppl as a guest at sumone elses house ,it is annoy and not nice ,i hope u gave him a piece of ur mind ;)
 pebbles061679
Joined: 11/6/2008
Msg: 44
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dating foreigners
Posted: 12/28/2008 1:05:31 PM
caramelspice,

I am from the states, but spent 10 months in Cork recently. The Irish are great people and there is A LOT less racism than here in the states. But I am SO tired of hearing how people are treated badly because of their skin color.

I read your profile and have to say that you are not a bad looking guy. However, a girl wants someone she can talk to. Your profile says that you are not that person. Your grammar and punctuation is horrendous. How much longer does it take to type you instead of u or some instead of sum? You also need to add "white space" to your description. And don't **** about how you're being judged first line out, or at all. It really sounds to me like you're making excuses for your own ineptitude. Take some responsibility, be proactive, and make the changes necessary. If you're not going to take the time in your profile, when you have all of it that you need, to make it the best you that you can be, what makes me think you're going to in real life and real time?
 caramelspice
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 45
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dating foreigners
Posted: 12/28/2008 9:35:18 PM
ouch pebbles that stings but its the truth
and i appreciate the feedback thank you
 caramelspice
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 46
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dating foreigners
Posted: 12/28/2008 9:38:07 PM
ps i did a small update baby steps
 celticmermaid
Joined: 10/12/2008
Msg: 47
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/29/2008 6:22:35 PM
Dear Caramel

let me respond to your question from the other side of the atlantic pond.

being an woman of irish descent I feel I can put in my two cents of opinion.

having dated a couple men of Indian descent, I get two more cents.
 zep_11
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 48
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/29/2008 6:40:35 PM
Interesting thread.. anyone want to hear about the Irish guy dating foreign girl scenario?
BTW.. go caramel, I know they all love ya really :-)
 celticmermaid
Joined: 10/12/2008
Msg: 49
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/29/2008 7:45:49 PM
perhaps I am a liberal and open minded individual.
Of the almost 40 men I've been on dates with over the past 3 years, more than half have NOT been white/or caucasian. And at least one third not born in the same country as I was. (( And just to clarify... that means dates in public places with conversations and beverages or activities like movies, walking, biking, etc. ....not random sexual encounters.)))

....but giving a guy a chance just because he is a person of color isn't a good reason to date them, for me.

I have a few female (white) friends that prefer darker skinned men. For those women, it's a good enough reason to date the guy.
Its a preference, like men who date only women with a particular color of eyes, or hair, or bra size. Men who select completely by a physical attribute. Women do that too. I'm going to guess you have preferences of your own.

The reasons I have dated men of all different nationalities has more to do with me being interested in who they ARE as people.
What experiences they might have had that are different than mine. Or similar to mine.
If they are articulate on their profile (be it POF, match, yahoo, craigslist, eharmony, etc) they get points and move to the front of the line.

Once I meet them in person, I can usually tell fairly quickly if their intelligence level is above or below how they presented themselves on their profile. It speaks to honesty and character. Important in my book.

If we go on a second or third date, and they can't have a conversation, but just sit there and stare at my breasts....well they just don't get to move to the next base if you know what I mean.

If their emails begin to degenerate to just a few poorly spelled words, then they also do not get to "pass go". This has been true for many many many men. White, black, brown......and whether English was their mother tongue or not. If you are struggling with composing sentences in English, say so. Its much more adult to say that, then to revert to lazy writing. I think you will find that you will have more success in getting women to interact with you.

Like one of the other responders said, using text lingo and internet abbreviations will be a turnoff to many women. SMS has its place.. Oh, its cute, once in a while, and after you have an established relationship, but never should take the place of a good communication.

Since you are Asian Indian, and I have dated a few men from that ethnic background I can also give you what I see as possible roadblocks to your success - based on my own experiences of course and comments I hear from single women:

(((Granted, i am writing this assuming that you did NOT grow up in Ireland, or the US and therefore did not have the same CULTURAL experiences in general, so please forgive me if I spin this wrongly....)))

1) I know women who would never consider dating a man of Asian Indian background because of their diets - which has a direct effect on how a person smells. The preparation of foods (cooking oil, heavy use of curry or chilis) can affect your personal skin fragrances, as well as how your clothing smells as it is exposed to those as well. And whether you keep to a veg or non-veg diet will affect it as well. Hygiene can be a whole different world between cultures. Each culture has different standards.
Showering everyday, wearing clean freshly laundered clothing, using deodorant, etc.
In the US, most US born women expect these things. Men from other cultures may not live up to the standard. And not just the subcontinent. Many places in the world have a different standard.
This is sometimes just a terrible stereotype, so forgive me.
But sometimes it is truth. Just a learned behavior.

I can assure you that women from the US are not the only one who notice this.
My roommate, a male who grew up in Mumbai, has had complaints about other male roommates whose hygiene
was definitely sub-standards. These are college educated men, adults. Many doing their graduate or post graduate studies.
Living on their own in circumstances that would allow them access to laundry and showers at will.

For women, smell is a really big turn on. Covering it up with commercial fragrence only lasts a while and once you get intimate, the real truth will be known.

2) If you plan to enter into an arranged marriage, but are just looking for "fun" now, it might be having an effect on your success rates. If you give off the aura that women are expendable and interchangeable, real women who are looking for a relationship or a connection will pick up on that.

3) desperation. If you are feeling super lonely and so desparate for physical contact, you just might overwhelm her.
One guy was so lonely (he had previously been married) he was offering to drive me to the grocery store and take me around town to do errands and similar things before the end of the first date. He just needed human interaction.

Emotionally available good. Emotionally starved, bad.

4) looking for a residency status anchor. Don't do it.

5) don't ask if she would consider marriage with you after one or two dates. I've had this happen three times now. I now think its just a general question, trying to find out if I would be open to continuing the relationship into a future time frame. In your culture its done more often...meet once or twice and then go for a more permanent legal connection. That strategy has its good and bad points. Just know that its a cultural difference that can play some serious mind games with a person who isn't ready for it. It feels so WEIRD. Because in my culture you don't ask that question until there is a serious connection. Instead ask, if she sees you spending more time together or something of that nature.

6) accents and language barriers - if your accent isn't from the UK, then while it might be cute at first, it might also be problematic.
If she can't understand what you are saying and asking you to repeat EVERYTHING, there is an issue. Get help. Speak slower. Pitch your voice down. I notice that men who learned British English in India speak VERY FAST and that causes a lot of miscommunication.

7) approach women who don't look like models.....
there, I've said it. Search through POF and look around your neighborhood. Approach women who at very first glance you DON"T find COMPLETELY hot. Expand your own horizons. You want women to move outside their comfort zone. You do it too. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised that once you really see her as a human FEMALE first (as you want her to see you not by the color of skin, or the accent, etc. but as A MALE) you are going to have much more success.

Your profile states you are on this website for friends.
But you are asking questions about getting opportunities for actual dates, I think you want more.

So update your profile. Expand your own horizons. Take the chip off your shoulder. Talk with honesty. Approach many women with confidence and humor, (a lack of desperation), and lots of really good hygiene.

Good luck.
 zep_11
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 50
dating foreigners
Posted: 12/30/2008 4:29:50 PM
wow.. youve been experienced cm!
Maybe you should pen some self-help books?
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