| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:05:28 PM | | I was almost going to go with Wild on this one, but I stopped and thought it for sec or two. I do remember the one late fall October evening when I hooked a very sweet fish on one of BC's finest rivers. After battling for over 15 minutes I do regret trying to horse him in. I sat down and cried, then laughed. I did learn a lesson that day. That fish taught me more than ya know. | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:10:04 PM | I want to qualify that I am cool with the decisions I have made and have come to accept a lot of things that have happened in my life. But as with any journey, the road will have potholes, obstacles, stops, starts and detours along the way. When you look back on the journey you can wonder what might have happened had you gone right or left. As for thoughts of raising children as a single parent, I will tell you that there isn't a single day that goes by where I think about the impact on the kids, and ML1 if you knew me, you would know that I would never slag Mom in front of the kids.. hardly ever do anyway. Loved her once and in a way, will always love her. Live with her is obviously another story.
I think this topic is scary for some as it forces you to lay bare what you may consider a weakness and accept that you might have done it differently given the chance. I believe there are a bunch of people that have learned little by their mistakes and continue to make them..... | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:34:29 PM | Would not change a thing now when I look back because I have two wonderful children and many experiences that have made me the person I am today.
I like who I am!! | |
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| discussing our pasts, it almost is inevitable that we will discuss what we would do differently if w
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:37:06 PM | discussing our pasts, it almost is inevitable that we will discuss what we would do differently if we were able to go back and change things
If I were able to go back and change things...as many have mentioned on here -
"EDUCATION" - paying more attention to my education in my younger years
and
I would focus on my passion bits at a time each year while my children grew , instead
of waiting till they grew thinking I could catch up after ... now I have the time but not the means anymore.
I would change how I reacted to some people be that good or bad - I just would.
EDIT/ADD (these are not regrets - these are just things I would do differently as the OP asked) | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:38:07 PM | ^^^ piggy
think your forum comments speak for themselves, I sometimes I can read between the lines...
my comment wasn't directed at you personally, just meant in general
sorry, should have been more specific
nice topic it is...
surround ones weaknesses with ones strength, knowing them is what counts and mistakes certainly can be a good indicator | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:41:19 PM | | I have one huge regret, and it will haunt me for the rest of my life...would i turn the clock back and change it...yes. Can i accept it and live with it....never....does life go on...yes it does...would it change my whole life if i could turn the clock back....more than you know, and way more than i could ever dream for....Did I learn from my mistakes....hell yes !!! Would I ever make the same mistake again....not a chance in hell. | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 6:41:59 PM | when i was younger i had no regrets and everything that happened made me who i am..
it's true everything that's happened to me makes me who i am..
the older i get the regret list gets longer...so in my case..
younger = less regrets....older definitely = more regrets...
i've come to an age where i can say i have regrets...
when i was younger ...never.........no regrets ever....
hindsight is 20/20...and i can clearly see what i would have changed..
i never thought i'd ever have any regrets..but i do....have a few...
i'm a poet and didn't know it......lol...
in my best Elvis voice " regrets i've had a few,but then again to few to mention "...
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 7:55:39 PM | ya, there is one thing that I would have done differently. My adopted son came to me will all sorts of problems that I was un aware of and did not understand. His birth mom was a young teen, who drank, smoked and did drugs during her pregnancy. When I was bringing him up I did not have the patience to deal with such a needy child, so I just chalked it up to inexperience on my part, and him being spoiled. It took until he was almost 20, when he met his birth family, to understand why he had so many problems. Although, in my defence, in his early years I did have him at a psychologist office as early as 5 years old, so I DID try.
So, yes, I can honestly say I would love to hit the rewind button and raise him with more compassion and patience. I have no excuse for how I reacted to his behaviour, as I was in my late 20's and should have known better. I still love my son, but I think I did damage mentally to him that will not heal.
But, lucky for me, this kid loves me with all his heart and has never blamed me for any of his "later in life" problems. He is a very special child.
Other than that, I would not change anything in my life. | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 8:05:47 PM | If I were able to go back and change things...as many have mentioned on here -
"EDUCATION" - paying more attention to my education in my younger years
So many of you have stated this in your post's and I share this same regret with you all,
so in my own way I am trying to "hit the rewind" by doing everything in my power
to insure my kid doesn't make this same immensely impactful mistake in his life.
I do wish I could go back and tell both of my parents(who died much too early in their lives)
that I understand and forgive completely, also that my love for them remained strong throughout all the crap................................... | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/25/2008 9:49:46 PM | I ignore the 'rewind' button and don't even acknowledge or consider the 'fast forward'...I prefer to hit 'play' and go from there....
D:) | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/26/2008 2:48:34 PM | Normally I would say that I never regret anything from my past because it has made me the person I am today. I honestly think I'm a pretty awesome person & I have lots of friends who love me for who I am. Had I not experienced life as it was, I may have missed some valuable life lessons & turned out to be a real biatch with a ton of enemies instead ... who knows?
But today is a really sucky day for me so I'm thinking about areas of my life where I might have screwed up:
* I would have followed my lifelong dream & ignored that MCP professor who discouraged me from pursing a career as a veterinarian & said, "this will always be a male profession & nobody will hire a female vet or take their pet to a female vet, so you're wasting your time & money".
* I would have finished my degree at UBC instead of taking my husband's advice that it was totally the wrong career for my personality, because now I know that it would have absolutely been the right career for me.
* I would have left my husband after 5 years of marriage instead of 15 years when my boys were babies & saved all of us from the psychological & manipulative abuse we suffered for so many years & also saved my children from exposure to the divorce crap they witnessed as impressionable teenagers. I know now that he did not deserve me or everything I put into our marriage. It's taken me 10 years to be able to say this with confidence without feeling embarrassed about patting my own back.
* Then I would have kept our first home with its small monthly mtge & bought out my husband's share of the equity. Or we would have sold the house & both walked away with $200,000 each to start off fresh, which would have been enough to buy two houses and two new vehicles back then ... & I would be rolling in the dough now.
* I would have taken guitar, voice & dance lessons & pursued a p/t career as a singer & maybe dancer, two of my biggest passions in life.
* I would not have quit piano lessons & competitive swimming after 8 years of rigorous training as a child & would have stuck with it, at least throughout my youth.
* I would have spent more weekends with my mom instead of spending so much time working or going away with my b/f & kids ... & maybe taken her on a cruise ... if I knew she was going to die so soon & so unexpectedly. | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/26/2008 3:02:28 PM | Sorry today's being so sucky, FunnyAndSweet. But hmmm, surely you can take every one of those "would have"s of yours and see how that path might have turned out WORSE, right? And maybe you'd be much further from the great person you are now.
I hope your Thanksgiving is full of reasons to be thankful and nothing whatsoever to regret or rewind.
--Ms. Flis | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/26/2008 8:38:34 PM | ^^^I'm not one who usually harps on the past 'cause there's nothing you can do to change the past so I haven't thought about all this shyte in many, many years. Best to just take the lessons learned from it to try & build a better future me thinks. 
Appreciate the Thanksgiving wishes but I remember going to the Island on Thanksgiving weekend & eating turkey, playing pool & winning a family poker game last month . Ahh ... it's time for the U.S. Thanksgiving. Does that mean I get to celebrate & pig out on turkey dinner all over again?    | |
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| Hit the rewind button
Posted: 11/28/2008 6:57:40 AM | I remember making the decision (fairly young) to not make any decisions that I would regret going forward, mostly a moral thing... one has to live with oneself after all. That was not apparent to me from birth. So while making decisions, I include the question, will I regret this, in decision making..etc etc
It follows that I must have regretted something to make that decision--but I don't remember what horrific decision I had made that would cause me to chanage my decision making like that!!!!! I just remember that I grew that day. And I am pretty sure that if I did remember I wouldn't share it with anyone.....ever. :O)
One regret I did have that I WILL share is that I often regretted sharing my son with his father. And indeed, MY life would have been a lot better if I had cut the father out entirely. I considered it at the time, but believed it is important for my child to know and have reason to appreciate his parents. Talking with my son recently, he appreciates his father in his life. So there you go. Life seems to be like that. You make the mistakes you do because that is what you have to learn. so you learn it (eventually), you grow as a person and if you want to have a healthy ego, that is what you remember. | |
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