| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 10:23:26 AM |
I guess now I have to turn in my membership card...lol
Fork it over! We got the bonfire ready! Good thing you didn't tell them about the secret decoder ring too. 
Um, just because the packaging (or plumbing) is different, doesn't mean that the product inside is. This is something I've been trying to point out to people for a while. Maybe, OP, they can understand your version better.
Good luck
~hands the card back to him for having the balls to say it~ | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 12:26:10 PM | Some secret hahaha men have hearts. Of course they do. They are flesh and blood humans like us females. They want to feel manly, and good about themselves.They want to express their emotions their way and have love in their life.Not all women are cheats Nebula, I have never and never will cheat.I have been cheated on.I was not the right person for that guy, he chose another, thats life and the world still turns. I don't want half or all of any mans money, I can earn my own.
So Valentino with the mysterious eyes is in love.Bless!!Good luck with that. Sociopath, rabid dog, yeah right, pull the other one it has xmas bells on it. You ain,t fooling anyone.Men are humourous, loving,caring wonderful beings, I like them just the way the are.Come in handy, for opening jars too. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 12:40:36 PM |
what complete and unmitigated bullshit. men care first and foremost about pretty + sex. if they can get that, only THEN are they willing to start thinking about whether or not pretty + sex lady actually cares about them. alas, pretty + sex lady often does not give a rat's ass about them for very long, because you're no different than any other guy out there lusting after her parts. she can pick & choose and try them all on for size until the cows come home.
Oh I don't think so,a lot of guys (and gals)? Absolutely,but stereotypes just don't work,I know men who are married to women that an best be described as plain.Yet they love them and don't even glance at another gal and that goes both ways.Do I have a standard of female that I prefer? Of course,we all do but you would be surprised to learn that intelligence and personality rank in the top 3 for me.I don't want to date an empty headed model,give me the country girl with a few miles on her and a great personality who can keep up with me.Of course there has to be a physical attraction but my standards are fairly broad,hell look at my photo,I ain't Brad Pitt. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 2:56:48 PM | OMG...
Don't let ValentinoScaramanga fool ya ladies... to break down his sociopath tendencies all one needs to do is stay out the kitchen and have a Southern accent 
And
Ron9 that was sweet and amusing | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 3:28:50 PM | Hey Ron....Thank you....I am so glad to see that someone out there has really figured it out..... And yes, if you give us crap.......well I will admit to slinging some "poop" back myself on occasion.....tee hee.....lol
sugar | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 5:21:07 PM | Blah Blah Blah
What good is knowledge of another being when in fact, it is the other being who is in total control of themselves (or should be) & there is not one single thing you can do to change that period?
I've done the same thing. I've reacted with anger to mask the hurt. That's my choice. It's called alienation. It didn't matter whether the other person knew it or not. THE only way that they were ever going to get closer to me is by my choice & mine alone. As in that I let them in. Knowing why I reacted the way I did didn't do a damn thing. See my point?
So if men truly do that crap then guess what? All they are doing is alienating people & for us to know this is simply a consolation prize to nothingness.
Knowing it doesn't make them get closer to us when we are standing there, heart in hand asking to be let in. Duh. They have to let go of the $hit & quit holding a grudge. There is nothing we can do to 'earn back' that from them. Grudges are grudges. Useless, wasted emotion.
But hey, thanks for sharing. LOL | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 5:42:24 PM | OP has got it right!
Dude, you are the REAL man and major league points should be added to your ManCard!
I was loved and needed as well by my wife and it made me a COMPLETE MAN.
Brother, I walked the walk and talked the talk, all because of her unconditional love of me. She needed me and I needed her.
And we both told that to each other thousands of times, especially at the end.
That's what true love is all about.
I want and need that again and I will find it.
Best of luck in your endeavor!
With your attitude, it will happen for you, for sure!
And, hopefully, me.  | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 5:45:47 PM | I thought the man code had something to do with beer, pizza, sports and tits...
Damn... Been going about this all wrong! | |
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vedin
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Joined: 9/25/2008
Msg: 62 | |
| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 6:01:59 PM | NHCowboy, your proposition is profound!
If we go through life without finding someone who cares about us (or at least someone who shows it) then we become tougher and meaner, with that "I don't need a woman" type attitude.
We are I believed programmed at a very early age, that programming is almost impossible to rewrite or delete. If one is kind it’s because someone kind nurtured them (male or female). If one is cruel it is because someone they have experienced cruelty very early on.
You can take a loving person later in life and treat them with cruelty. While they may be angry, it will not stop them being a loving person.
Take a cruel person later in life and give them love, it will very likely go unappreciated.
In a nutshell its hard to teach an old dog new tricks!
Thanks for such an interesting post. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 6:28:03 PM | Here Here, Cowboy!!!! that bad relationship thing is soooo over rated! Being alone, isn't all that bad when you've gotten yourself through one of those horrible break ups!
I recently was dreading going to an event alone and a friend lightened my mood by telling me that half of the people there probably wished they were there alone rather than with the people they had to be there with! He was probably right about that....
And that "secret man code"... its not so secret...we girls have known for a long time what you guys are all about... its all about making the right match... if two people don't "click", those clicks can turn into the wrong kind of sparks in a real big hurry! | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 6:51:14 PM | | hmmmmm...tried that whole caring about your man thing and all I got was "I dont want to talk about it, or "your smothering me, or they just ran off because , OMG, a woman liked them to much! perhaps they were the a**holes of which you spoke? lol! | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 7:41:14 PM | The notion that being 'raised' with love .. creates a loving person and one who is raised in cruelty will become cruel, well it's not really an accurate notion.
The things that my family did, by that assumption; would mean that I should be heartless, cold, selfish, no compassion ..
Not going to write a list or blow my own horn - but I can stand tall and say I am none of those things. I care deeply for others and when and where I can I try to help out. Many people who Are compassionate, are that way Because of their own hardships. When you 'know' what That hurt feels like, it isn't something you want to do to others.
* I accept there may be exceptions.
Sorry to interrupt the levity of this thread, I just had to say that.
OT - I like a man who is in touch with and able to express his feelings .. provided of course he is The man .. strong, protective, safe .. sigh .. :)
And there are men who are in touch and who can communicate, I am lucky enough to know a few .. but maybe it has to do with my focus ... ;) | |
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vedin
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Joined: 9/25/2008
Msg: 67 | |
| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 7:59:51 PM |
The notion that being 'raised' with love .. creates a loving person and one who is raised in cruelty will become cruel, well it's not really an accurate notion
Please believe me when I say, I know where you are coming from. I have had pretty rough experiences in my childhood and thankfully turned out ok. I once presented an argument very similar to the one you outline her to a wise lady. She replied by saying “I know you had it hard, but who nurtured you?”
I thought about it and remembered that through all the pain my grandmother was always there to give me kindness. She had a profound influence on how I would later interpret senseless cruelty | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 9:32:13 PM | Whew! After months of deliberation and countless hours spent in secret "man club" meetings, we (men) finally agreed on making NHCowboy our official spokesman.
Speak for yourself dude. That was such crap I just can't resist picking it apart. First, you bring up sex. Here's a newsflash for you: Women love sex too. Lots of women like lots of sex. It's "up there" for women too.
And wanting someone who cares about us? We weren't raised to show it? I don't think it has anything to do with how someone is raised. Hell, i'm a grown man, I choose how to live my life.
Most of them are just hurt...? EVERYONE has been hurt (Susan, fifth grade, you know who you are), men and women. ANYONE can be bitter. Again, its about choice.
When we're hurt we show strength (i.e. anger)? Really? I thought that acting out in anger (not righteous indignation) had something to do with emotional immaturity.
A real man never takes anger to physical extremes but says hateful things...to protect himself. Men, my friend, think before they act, and if the can't think fast they just shut up until they can think of a way to make her think she's right, without actually conceeding, so they can still have sex later.
I feel for you dude. I can see that you are in a place that maybe you feel like you have to bare your soul and thats fine. Just don't do it on my behalf. I don't find myself agreeing with you on most things.
Now of course, as is the custom in the man club, you must commit the act of Seppuku since you have broken loyalty with our neato little club. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 9:50:36 PM | I can't believe it took 71 postings for men to publish a good critique of this thread.
PS: I agree wholeheartedly with you, Vedin: [Quote] If one is kind it’s because someone kind nurtured them (male or female).
Still, there are no excuses for rudeness toward strangers: at a certain point it becomes a matter of civility and reasoning. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/2/2008 10:08:51 PM |
Yes sex is right up there, however, the biggest thing all men want is to know someone cares about them.
LOL!
I will let you in on another secret... even my dog wants to know it's loved and cared for.
Think about it, most times when a man becomes ornery it is usually after an argument or "fight"...his feelings are hurt...yup it's true.
That's like saying that after a boxing match, one or both boxers have some bruises.
The purpose of a "fight" is to hurt the other person's feelings. I will be impressed if after a fight, no one's feelings are hurt. But if no one's feelings were hurt, then it wasn't a fight, was it?
We are taught at an early age to not show weakness so instead (when we get hurt) we show strength (i.e. anger).
Remaining calm is a strength. Getting angry while having a fight is what normally happens. Anger, in the context of "fights" is not a strength. Anger can give you physical strength - a boots of energy - but it's not a strength of the mind.
A real man never takes that anger to physical extremes (toward a woman) but that is the whole reason (mostly) that he says those hateful things....because he is protecting himself and his feelings.
Who likes having their feelings hurt? If there is someone here who likes their feelings hurt, seek help.
I guess now I have to turn in my membership card.
Stating the obvious isn't grounds for "membership suspension" from the imaginary men club. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/3/2008 6:11:43 AM | We women and you men all need to talk. Sweet Lass has the best post here, Ron9, are you trying to get laid again? LOL. I agree with Lass when she says that we all need to love each other for who we truly are. We need to reach each other's hearts. The only way to do that is with faith in ourselves and trust in the faith we have in ourselves to reveal our hearts to those we dare to love, without getting hurt. Love is a divine power, we can't control it. Men and women were raised to be different and we are also different, but we are all human. We together are the warp and the weave that become the wondrous tapestry of life. Together we can do anything. Let's get together and start a new club.
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/3/2008 6:51:48 AM | I hereby revoke your membership card on the grounds of not breaking your post into paragraphs. Making long posts without busting it into paragraph format is grounds alone to revoke said license.
You are dismissed.
and: Too long; didn't read. | |
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| Breaking the secret man code shhhh!
Posted: 12/3/2008 6:57:59 AM | Men are taught not show our emotions and to be loyal and dutiful. Furthermore, most men including myself had bad role models from our childhood and have to find suitable ones through life. Is it a wonder that we want to be loved but don't know how to or more importantly don't know how to tell someone else?
I give this guy major props for bringing it into the open. It may not be a novel statement but the next time you women get hurt by some gratuitous email, think twice about judging the guy sending it. Cut us some slack and stop stereotyping guys for being sexual and emotionless. The last I saw, females are becoming more aggressive, logical, and efficient to get ahead professionally, which undoubtably affects their personal relationships. I see it all the time in New York.
Also, the last thing guys want is another guy so if you women are unsuccessful in relating to us it could be that you are intimidating or just not feminine enough. | |
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