| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/21/2009 4:49:54 PM |
Men are not running away from intelligent and witty women, they are just running away from the women who claim to be but are not.
Agree, the same is true on the flipside.
That's one of the reasons my profile(s) are so outside the "norm". Yes, profiles because I like to write.
I was never all that comfortable with making claims, because bottom line, no matter what I may think about myself, it's up to the other person to make their own decision. Same for everyone else, they do anyway, so I'd rather post something I had fun writing and with a more humorous bent. Like it, lump it, from the email I get many get the humor, a very few don't. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/21/2009 8:51:07 PM | I admit I haven't read more than half of this thread, but op, you should realize that it it others' perception of you, not your portrayal, that makes you attractive. This is not to say that you aren't classy, witty & intelligent, but that you need to be careful of how you define yourself, and not to come across as pompous or arrogant. One can be classy, witty, intelligent, and also sexy & fun!
At the risk of offending the 20 something males (not that I care, as they are far too young for me, and far too old for my daughters!  ), it is likely that the boys your age wouldn't recognize those qualities anyway, unless they were tattooed on your breasts. Good luck! | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/21/2009 8:59:29 PM |
At the risk of offending the 20 something males (not that I care, as they are far too young for me, and far too old for my daughters! ), it is likely that the boys your age wouldn't recognize those qualities anyway, unless they were tattooed on your breasts. Good luck!
Not to worry, I doubt whether anyone would find it offensive, but it does appear to prove that you probably turned a blind eye to the guys who were in fact capable of appreciating those qualities when you were that age yourself. 
Anyway, it's not just the guys who are this way, the girls are also much less likely to notice a decent guy with a good head on his shoulders if he doesn't look like one of the "McDreamy"s of this world. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/21/2009 10:23:11 PM | How about this. Women who have the veneer of high intelligence are dying to find themselves in the hands of lamberjack types who simply don't understand the "intelligent" BS for awhile and walk away because they can't converse in that foreign language. Then they lear to smile and the sparks fly.
Now you know the rest of the story. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/21/2009 10:59:56 PM | | I think that when two people have the same type of interests or sense of humor coupled with similar intelligence, then it can make for great conversations and great fun. I don't think it really boils down to men not liking intelligence or liking it but it is an element in whether two people can really get along. I'm sure there are plenty of women who have similar intelligence to me but there interests are different or different sense of humor so it may appear that i don't like intelligent women which wouldn't have anything to do with it. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/23/2009 7:48:32 AM | To that, I'd ask, what quantifies this intelligence exactly? I mean is it the ability to communicate effectively? Is it how quickly she can grasp things?
IMO, what quantifies "intelligence", is not so much raw IQ, but a woman who is adept and self reliant, capable at problem solving, and is not naive about her surroundings, and the way that people operate.
Those who seek an "intelligent" woman, are looking for a partner. They're looking for a relationship based on interdependence.
There are those who look for co-dependent relationships, like men who look for a "mommy", or look to be the "daddy" in the relationship.
I still think that intelligence is cool but I suspect that most men are more attracted to a woman who makes him feel lucky to have her in his life.
I would say that's exactly right, however, the reasons for feeling "lucky" about a woman can vary wildly when you factor what relationship type a particular man is seeking.
A man looking to be the "daddy" paired up with an "intelligent" woman, as I elaborated on earlier, would not be a good fit.
That's why shopping for a partner soley by "attributes" is foolish without doing an analysis of their characters and behaviours. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/28/2009 2:45:18 PM | (sucks air into chest, to once again deliver a message that will fall on deaf ears, but here goes...)
Men don't dislike intelligent and witty women. We dislike abrasive, obnoxious ones, who THINK they're intelligent and witty.
Is it just me, or is it really hilarious how some women (I'm sure men do it too) will, after a relationship heads south, state that it was because they were "too much of (X)", where X is a POSITIVE attribute?
Why do people have such a dread of making HONEST self-appraisals, and instead retreat into grade-school, "Oh, well, I was too good for him/her!" You weren't too good; you were a waste of skin in their eyes!
Sheesh... 
Bimbly | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/28/2009 3:16:21 PM | | Because with some men all they want is sex and they know that with a woman with some sense isn't going to for all of that. I like intelligent and witty women. Trust and believe they are freaky too but they want more than just sex. | |
|
| |
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 10/28/2009 6:27:16 PM |
Okay, from my person experience, only a small demographic of men actually like women who portray themselves as classy, intelligent beings with a great sense of humor. I like them, but do they like me? Can they get past my forwardness and direct nature?
They may say that these are fantastic attributes, yet I constantly see men chasing the stereotypical sexpot. I've also been dumped a couple times for someone deemed "more attractive", and or frankly dumb. I'm not trying to sound arrogant by any means, but are men intimidated by this? Or, am I just meeting the wrong (shallow) people? I'd like to hear your opinions, or stories. Thanks! Me personally I would never dump someone I really liked for someone who is visually more "attractive". A person who is good looking enough can become incredibly "attractive" to me if there is brains & intelligence behind that, turning me on MORE than just somebody who is theoretically better looking. | |
|
| |
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/6/2009 11:10:58 PM | | I think stupid chicks are getting the short end of the stick in this thread. All these guys proclaiming that they will only date the most intelligent women around. Well, I will gladly go out with any not-so-smart women who may come around. I don't need to sit around and talk about politics or Noam Chomsky, or any other BS that self-proclaimed "smart" folks like to mentally masturbate over. I don't care what your IQ is, it's all about the heart. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/7/2009 3:45:35 PM | men like women who are intelligent, witty and with sense of humor...however, the following things are things that might stand in the way (unfortunatelly): body odor, no sense of style, being clingy, being stuck up, being too short, being too fat, .....you name it...You know these things...insecurity is a big one...we tend to put down the pretty girls because we know that we don't quite look like them...I personally always wanted to be described as unique ,desireable,interesting and sexy...My intelligence is always seen right away as well as my sense of humor so I never really tried that hard...I am a big girl, and I know that there are women prettier than me but what draws men (some men) to me is my personality...
Reevaluate and try again,
best of luck! | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/7/2009 11:28:24 PM |
I am a big girl, and I know that there are women prettier than me but what draws men (some men) to me is my personality...
I bet it is, indeed! I've only read one paragraph from you but I already can tell that you have a very positive outlook on life that can be a real man-magnet.
Frankly, I've found the world to be a great mirror. If all you see outside is negativity, then there's probably a lot of negativity inside of you. That's why I choose the women who have a great outlook on life. If they can see the beauty and wonder of the world, then that means they are beautiful, wonderful people inside, too.
If you think you're being rejected because you're intelligent and witty, you're wrong. If you think you're being rejected because you're overweight, you're wrong. If you think you're being rejected because of your height, you're wrong.
The reason you're being rejected is because you think you're being rejected. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/8/2009 7:22:40 PM | I don't think you are getting out enough or just not with the right crowd.
One question. Are you equating wit with sarcasim? That can be a turnoff.
Could it be that some of these guys you refer to lack maturity and self confidence? | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/15/2009 4:16:52 AM | | You are picking the wrong guys to meet, or mis-treating the guys you date. J.K. Rowling is intelligent,and witty, and-as the richest woman in the United Kingdom, and third richest woman in the world-she has no trouble getting a date when she wants one. Of course, she has enough money that she is not looking for Prince Moneybags to come along, and rescue her from the drudgery of work, and she already owns her own castle...literally. Without more data, I can't say much about you. | |
|
| |
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/15/2009 4:57:20 AM | | You couldn't intimidate me if you had the 82nd Airborne to back you up. One thing, though...those of you who think you know it all tend to annoy those of us who actually do. Stupid sexpots are fun because they put out...without expecting the sun, and the moon, as payment. That makes them nice for short term relationships. Intelligent, and witty, is nice for long term relationships. If you are long term material, but constantly trying to hook up with short term minded guys, you are going to be disappointed. Then too, there is humor, and then there is humor. Is your idea of funny: The Three Stooges, Benny Hill, The Last Of The Summer Wine, Jeeves & Wooster, Sex To Sexty, all of the above, none of the above, or what? It may matter. If you hate Benny Hill, but think Macbeth is a laugh riot, don't expect most guys to agree. Younger guys tend to prefer short term relationships with no real commitment. Older guys often want long term commitments. Do you only try to date young guys? If so, consider a change. If you are so intelligent, and witty, what keeps you from being stereotypically sex-pottish? Can't you don a mini-skirt,and low cut blouse, occasionally, to please a man you are with? Perhaps you'd rather die than give a guy head...while the typical sexpots provide guys with great head without being asked? There are too many possibilities for us to know what is wrong with you until we get more information about you. I'll bet it has something to do with your attitude, though. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:24:48 AM | Yes, some men are intimidated by this. Can't blame them, really. It's just their preference to have women who don't possess these qualities.
As well, perhaps you're giving off the wrong impression. Are you being classy, or prudish? Intelligent, or prestigious? Are you actually being funny, or quirky? All of these personality traits exist on a spectrum.
The women I would describe as classy, intelligent, and funny have never had a problem getting men. | |
|
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/15/2009 7:44:20 AM |
Men (seem to) dislike intelligent and witty women.
Men/people (generally seem to) like me (as I like most people).
Therefore...
I'm dumb and dim witted.
Wow, that was a brilliant deduction. You must be very intelli---
Oh, wait... Now my head hurts. | |
|
| |
| Why does it seem that men dislike intelligent and witty women?
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:18:35 AM |
Men don't dislike intelligent and witty women. We dislike abrasive, obnoxious ones, who THINK they're intelligent and witty.
This guy nailed it. You have to love the self delusion: "he dumped me because I was TOO intelligent and witty and he felt threatened" The same women probably think they are TOO good looking! | |
|
| |
| |
Home
login 
