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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 1/11/2009 6:22:05 AM | Some men don't have an 'edit' program on their mouth. They may not realize how idiotic saying something like that sounds. They may not be able to tell the difference between a dinner in a public place with several couples, and an annual weekend Beer Hunt out in the woods with their college buddies, where any comment, the more outrageous the better, is laughed at.
There is, however, a difference. What's appropriate to say with a bunch of drunk guys and what's appropriate to say in a mixed group at a restaurant MAY actually be different, LOL.
If the person did that often, I'd start to think it was more than a nervous blurting out of some nonsense when they feel under pressure.
I'd think either that the person had absolutely no ability to judge social situations and had a serious problem with respecting other people's boundaries, or that he had an aggression/anger problem.
It's also QUITE possible that the man is completely serious, and that he has a serious problem with aggression against women. Since that problem does tend to get worse over time, going from comments to actual action, I would be very, very cautious around the person. It would take a fair amount of convincing for me to believe that someone who says something like that, doesn't have a problem. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 1/12/2009 7:26:12 AM | the dude has issues......especially if he said that in a average/good mood, imagine what he would think if he was angry at his gf
^^
contact350 has an good point! as well as Hanna above me...
is it possible such comments containing violence could be an indicator of a person's underlying dark characteristic that easily manifests during anger?
I would think so
run forest run! | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:08:23 AM | RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN ....... my ex of 2 years once joked about that, then towards the end he moved on to talking about choking women unconscious during sex, or "role playing" a rapist that had broken into the house. I reacted with disgust, and he got angry!!!
Two days later, I was calling 9-1-1 for domestic violence, and have never seen him again.
It's an indicator of some ISSUES, OR, it's just a deeply lacking respect for women as human beings - not c*m sponges
So I repeat "RUN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 3/25/2009 1:08:26 PM | **Update**
I know I haven't posted on this issue for a while. Well my friend is still with that idiot. I see her every now and again, but I don't go out of my way to drop by her house. I dislike that guy a lot so I am keeping my distance.
But the part of this OP I wanted to really update was that they caught the serial rapist. It wasn't her loser BF, but it was a guy that is accused of killing his girlfriend and then hiding out in an old freezer across the street from her house. Sick dude for sure. But they did a DNA test and his DNA has come up to a match for at least 3 rapes in the area. So they have him.
Edit : I had to change the was to wasn't. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 3/25/2009 2:36:20 PM | I'd tell him I didn't appreciate such a comment and how it was very disrespectful. More than likely it would cause me to examine the relationship and eventually end it. All within the 5 minutes of following his comment. I work fast.
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 3/25/2009 3:08:20 PM | NOTHING remotely FUNNY about RAPE.
Not to mention the idea that he was explicitly lusting after a woman while in my company.
I would have gotten up, called a cab and never looked back.
No excuses, no explanations, no more contact. Period! | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 3/26/2009 9:26:52 PM | | Were I a female, and I had a SO that joked about raping a women, id punch him in the balls. plain and simple. I've known people that have been raped and it truly affects most every part of their lives. there is nothing funny about it. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 3/27/2009 3:08:54 AM | Some of the comments on here make me sick to my stomach. We all have a different sense of humor but there is no such thing about making a joke of sexual assault(formally called rape). Those who have been survivors of this go through the worst pain in life. It's worse than murdering someone. At least after the pain and torture go away, they are killed. A woman who is sexually assaulted never gets over that, never has a normal life again and gets to live with PTSD for the rest of their lives. What a great way to life.
If someone said that in my presence I would give them facts about sexual assault and then I would leave and never talk to them again.
Sexual assault is not a thing to joke about and anyone who thinks there is anything funny about it is in need of some therapy and needs to spend time with sexual assault survivors.
~Carrie | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 3/27/2009 4:49:58 PM | Some of the posters on the thread have the emotional maturity of 12 year olds. They hear someone say, "is," and they say "is not." And these merciless comments, made with the depth of observation of a sex-rag cartoonist, are supposed to amuse. Many years ago I intervened when someone was accosting a woman and had begun to put his hands on her. I managed to cool the situation down thanks to the gift of gab and he left. As obvious as the question might be, I asked him if he'd mind me running down the street towards his Sister or his Mother, then come on to them. Then put my hand on them. In his somewhat inebriated state he got angry at the suggestion. Then I pointed out that that girl he was bothering was someone's Sister and might be someone's Mother. I got through to him and he left. What I'll never forget is the look of terror on the girl's face. More than terror actually, it was horror. She was smaller than him, she was weaker than him, she was at the mercy of this predator.
I suggest the b/f who made the original comment and anyone else who thinks rape is funny, be put into a prison shower room with a bar of soap, and have the guard say, "I'll be back in 15 minutes." Let them see what helplessness and absolute fear feel like. Let them be ashamed of their bodies the rest of their lives, unable to trust, unable to sleep in a dark room.
b/f boy is an ***hole and his g/f is a jerk for not confronting him with his ignorance. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 5/8/2009 6:56:07 PM |
I would slowly turn, look him straight in the eyes and without a word slap the every loving sh!t right out of him and get up and leave him sitting there, cheeks stinging.
He would still be an idiot and you would now be a violent criminal who deserved to spend time in prison. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 7/23/2009 5:13:25 PM | That's like saying that if I weren't with you I would murder that person tonight.
Nothing funny about that. I think he meant it in a way.
Guys who talk about rape have it on their minds. I wouldn't have a boyfriend
who could say a thing like that. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 7/23/2009 5:47:20 PM | I hate men like that! They give men a bad name because it does not even matter if the little shit was joking. Calling out in a crowded theater "Fire" is moronic, and just as distasteful as telling someone even offhandedly that you would rape them. Boys and men have more sense than this prag!
Rape is not funny, it is not another way of saying "I love you" as one dumbass posted either. It is a violation of everything that makes a person human. It is unfinished murder.
"The only difference between being raped and being hit by a truck is that afterwards the rapist ask if you liked it."- Margaret T. Rape Survivor and Poet Laureate | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 7/23/2009 5:51:58 PM | dark humor doesn't exclude any subject, but you've got to really, really know your audience to pull off this one.
people in my ska band, including a woman, love to go to places like this. www.urbandictionary dot com/define.php?term=pirate+sex
not really my taste, but hey, if it works for them. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 7/23/2009 5:58:16 PM | Dark humor is not the same as tasteless. Maybe it seems funny to a select few, but then those are the same ones who could not imagine one of their love ones being attacked and violated. You never know for sure who your audience is, just as the prag in the post may not have realized (though he should have) that he had offended his g/f and a male friend, too. Sometimes, it is better to keep ones trap shut, or say something different. By age ten, you are too old to say those kind of stupid things, so at age twenty something either he is mentally challenged, or a sociopath. | |
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| If Your BF Joked To You About Raping A Woman, What Would You Do?
Posted: 7/23/2009 7:09:07 PM | This is interesting. There is a thread devoted to women purporting that it's "okay" to have rape fantasies and yet a guy makes an inappropriate comment about rape and probably meant it in a different context and he gets put down for it.
I agree that his comment was downright idiotic, but I just don't get how this fits without it being highly hypocritical of some of the posters who responded here considering their views on "rape fantasies." Pffft..whatever.
Anyway, my response to him would have been :
"You know, I've been waiting for you to do something stupid enough for me to dump your sorry A$$ and baby cakes, today is the day. Might want to chase her out the door because you sure as sh*t aren't getting anymore milk from this cow." Moooooove out." | |
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