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| | Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?Page 3 of 34 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34) | Singledadcb,
Same here. I, too, have a teenage daughter and I have done my best to set good examples for her as well as give her solid values. I don't understand why you'd get negative feedback. There is nothing wrong with a parent trying to teach their kids right from wrong. Hopefully, you have an open enough relationship with your daughter that you can speak to her about sex. My daughter and I do to a certain extent. When she was younger and asked me questions, I answered them honestly. However, now she gets a bit embarassed to discuss it, but I've always told her she could tell me anything. Over and over I have stressed the importance of safe sex and that hopefully before she makes that decision she will talk to me. She has informed me she will remain pure until she gets married and has asked for a purity ring. Considering I told her she is not getting married until she graduates from college, she has a ways to go. So, if/when the time comes that she changes her mind, all I can do is be there for her. Keep up the good parenting! It does make a HUGE difference in how our kids grow up! | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/3/2009 11:17:42 PM | | I was barely 19 when I had my oldest, and turns out I was a pretty good mom. So what if we're young? I don't see the difference between being a mother at 15 or at 25, as long as you take care of the baby, and act as a responsible parent should. I know women who are 26, 27 and are about as mature as a 13 year old. Age shouldn't decide wether you're adult enough to be a mother. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/3/2009 11:29:07 PM | it raises the  and:modhammer: why would they would they want to ruin there career at that age maybe they can rely on welfare and they dont need to look for work ever again but in that suition once they have been with dead beats they dont plan on having more kids in future and in the long term realtionship would probaly ruin there long term realtionship i would say  while you can if you are from canada you must have to know the laws up there | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 4:30:33 AM | The reason it matters more when you are young - no matter how good a mom you are - most marraiges these days don't survive having kids. The main reason being it does tend to take away from the parents time together and if you can't find quality time as a married couple how much real time can you offer to a new mate?
Of course this post will be picked apart because it will be viewed as - you men are just selfish- but it is true.
Women have no problem neglecting their husbands and mates for the sake of the children, the results usually lead to men seeking that closeness outside of the relationship or at the bottom of a bottle. Next step after that is the fighting and then divorce and then you end up here, hoping you will find someone who is willing and stupid enough to be third or fourth in your life after your precious brood.
Where if you had actually cared fro your mate or husband a little more and communicated together kepping the basis of the relationship solid you might have actually avoided the grief.
And the circle of modern relationship is complete. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 4:37:12 AM | "avoided the grief."
LOL I love being single and I love being a parent. No grief here, but I see couples that stay together even though they hate each other. Talk about grief. Some peolpe don't do single well, but lots of us, even lots of us full time parents, would not have it any other way. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 5:19:04 AM | But that grief was caused because of the bassacwards approach to finding a mate these days. More relationships are based on convenience and not real communication.
Parenting styles, same game plans etc. essential discussions that should have taken place before embarking into parenthood instead we fall into a bandaid approach of we'll deal with it when the time comes and we can see how that seems to be going.
So have you become another of the selfish single parents who are glad you don't have to actually compromise what YOU want to avoid conflict.
Then you are teaching your children that you don't need two parents too?
How quaint. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 5:27:33 AM | Q: So have you become another of the selfish single parents who are glad you don't have to actually compromise what YOU want to avoid conflict.
A: No I still have to make compromises I am single, but not King, not yet any way.
"Then you are teaching your children that you don't need two parents too?" This is true you don't need two parents. Fact
One good parent is better then two that hate each other. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 9:40:26 AM | Well to be honest for me, 18 is kinda young still.. I mean like you just graduated from high school and going to college/university. It sucks to have a kid at that age my friend she had her baby at 18 and it took her 4 years to get back to school and finish high school. i had mine when i was 23 and by the time my daughter turns 1 i'll be 24.. i've finished school already and had a good career but right now i'm on maternity leave..
Old fashion? having babies after 25 is the modern thing and they have more high risk as most doctor would say.. as far as i know thats what i have heard correct me if i am wrong.. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 10:50:32 AM | | i agree , single mothers with means of income milk the sytem dry ! and their children see their Mom get up at 12 in the afternoon , and aspire to do nothing but wait for a handout ....... Some women probably believe its easier to raise kids at home rather than look for work ! | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 12:39:37 PM | | I read this thread and thought i would put in my pennies worth! I was a young mum i had my son at 16(he is 21 on sunday bless him),i had a challenging time raising him as i was so young however i managed to do it maybe not perfectly but well enough. I also had my daughter at aged 34( she will be 3 next week) this was also a challenge even though i was so much older. My point is this..no matter if you are 16 or 34 it is still not easy to bring up children especially if you are single. I think single mums get a hard time for various reasons and younger ones get it worse. It is worrying that there are young uns out there being single mothers however as long as they treat their child with love and care and get support when needed then more power to them x | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 1:44:00 PM | is it really old fashioned to be over 25 in my experience reading and learning about history didn't they start at like 16 and having like 4 kids by 20 so according to history I am half way to normal.
now aside from being a smart ass I would like to say there is a different story for every situation and some good bad or ugly as a single mom I dont want a man that can comprehend life happens and we all have our paths to follow and I want a man who does enjoy the presence of children eventually of course who has fun at the zoo and a dinner club this man will most likely not be some unsure insecure boy who doesnt need the extra pressure of dating but a well rounded individual who isnt afraid of a little risk and excitment.
heather | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 9:25:03 PM |
Career is a term defined by the Oxford English Dictionary as an individual's "course or progress through life (or a distinct portion of life)". It usually is considered to pertain to remunerative work (and sometimes also formal education).
A career is mostly seen as a course of successive situations that make up a person's occupation. One can have a sporting career or a musical career without being a professional athlete or musician, but most frequently "career" in the 20th century referenced the series of jobs or positions by which one earned one's money. It tended to look only at the past.
I really am sorry...but
Age 18 plus 4 yrs of school runs you to 22....and 9 months pg...23 and now 24 and off on mat leave.....so where is the career you speak of?
and high risk???in respect to children after 25...so what is the divorce rate for most married couples? 40% to 50% and what then happens to young woman with children and a career that last all of 1 or was it 2 years?
And supposedly marriages with blended families or to woman with children from a previous relationship even higher....glad you see having children early is not high risk!
And you talk of high risk? | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 9:32:07 PM | i was 19 when my daughter was born as i ready hell no but we made the best of it and by 21 i was a single dad single full time dad and have never looked back and why are there so many single mom's cause most times the "dad" isn't man enough to be a dad and isn't ready to stick around and be a family so i feel sorry for them cause i know how hard it is being a single dad and finding someone i'm sure its harder being a single mom and trying to find someone so hats off to the single moms out there | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/4/2009 9:37:34 PM | Actually teal I tend to agree regarding the 'high risk' scenario (physically AND emotionally.) Having had a child at the tender age of 21, and my second at the age of 33, I would have to say that physically *and* emotionally, I was far better equipped at 33, then 21. Sadly in some ways, I am twice the Mother to my youngest son than I was for my eldest, at that age. With modern medicine, pregnancies aren't considered higher risk until you're over 40.
I do disagree with your comment about her career though. Most students graduate at 17, putting them at 21/22 when they graduate post secondary, however with a diploma or certificate, they could be much younger. If she's on mat leave, she'll only be spending a year at home before going back to her career. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 3:19:03 AM | cleansed2.0 = nowserving.... I just figured it out.
On Topic....What concerns me more than young single mothers aged 18-22 is that they are "single" moms. Women have been getting pregnant during those ages I am sure for quite a while now....they just weren't going it alone.
I would be far more concerned why these young men are finding it acceptable to bail when a woman is having their baby and why some young women are pushing young men away . What happened to good old-fashioned responsibility? Is that not being taught to our sons and daughters? What are the sexual values being taught to the younger generation? | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 6:08:07 AM | Aaaaaahhhhhh I'm touched itsallinthesoul that you spend that much time thinking about me, I hope boyfriend isn't jealous and you can thank me for the orgasm later.
But I have to say you are smarter than you look. See I know why I am here. Nursing an injury so I have lots of free time to ruffle feathers, it's entertaining and easy here because I've never run across a more defensive group before as single moms.
See I've begun a lobby presentation and this is mainly just great ammunition that is in a public fora. Yeah my profile is bogus but show me an honest one and I'll eat my keyboard. What troubles me though is why you spend so much time here?
Or do you pretend to be mom as well as a self delusional therapist as you caudle every new mom that joins up? Yuo spend more time with us than them.
Back on topic though, Times are tough and forcasted to get tougher. Just yesterday London college closed its doors and from my sources many colleges and universities are looking to cut costs and shut down satelite campuses, so the competition for those shrinking seats will get harder.
Second career is also chewing into the available ones left. Where do you think all those young single moms will go that need an education because it will only be a matter of time when young ladies who didn't decide to become moms will demand those seats.
Are you going to tell them that young mothers are more deserving than they are?
And as I have stated before and just based on the posts from a couple of the young gents here in this thread, a lot of guys aren't stepping up. It's bad I know but still very evident but whose fault is it really? Just the guys? Remember those guys can't get pregnant and the stats do show that abortion has dropped and kids will have a greater fiscal impact than preventing unplanned pregnancies. Your an accountant , do the math and tell me where you think the government number crunchers will cut first? | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 8:00:06 AM | Erm, first post on here so go easy! lol
Will hold hands up and say I haven't read every response, mainly because my daughter keeps changing her mind about what it is she wants to be dressed up as.
Someone said single moms are defensve, too right we are, we get a lot of stick.
I had my first child, within marriage at the age of 20, my second at 22. My marriage failed, fair enough young marriage young stupid, thinking that I'm sure.
However my point, is that I didnt go out and think, I know, what will make my life really difficult, take away my freedom, make people judge me and make me have to look to the government for support - lets pop out a sprog!
No. Not so much. I had my youngest with a steady partner, who three weeks before her birth decided he didn't want to be a father again and bailed. Has nothing to do with her.
Yes, I 'live off the state' if you want to put it like that. But not out of choice. I don;t want to put my children in full time childcare, I want to enjoy them. But I am , and I will.
Not all single young mums want to sit on their backsides the rest of their lives. Some of us want to stand on our own two feet. It's just easier said than done sometimes.
Anyway thats my two-penneth!
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 8:21:22 AM | Well nowserving....you better start eating your keyboard because my profile is 100% real. Whether I have a boyfriend or not is none of your business but believe me when I tell you that I don't think of you at all and never in the way you seem to imply...I just noticed that you responded under two identities in another thread...the style of writing and the platform was similar...doesn't take a rocket scientist, just someone observant, which I am.
I'm glad we single moms are a source of amusement to you. It shows the kind of person you are and no, it is not a pretty picture.
As to why I spend so much time here....unlike you, I have a job that provides me with flexibility (for my children) so I work mainly from home. When I need a break, I will peruse the forums but my intentions are not as malicious as yours are. I have always been a student of human nature, used to do a lot of people watching before the internet and forums such as this existed. We are fascinating creatures you know.
I just prefer to share my actual experience with others ... if it provides them with a feeling that they are not alone, great....if it helps them to see a situation they are mired in great...if it is fodder for someone like you to manipulate and twist to suit your perverted sense of how to treat people...well that is the risk now isn't it.
As for the amount of time I spend with my children....lol....how the hell would you know? You assume I do nothing but this....if that were true, I would not be able to make my mortgage payments, feed or clothe my family. Oh my, I might become one of those welfare recipients that you love to bash.
As for anything else you have to say....now that your true colours are shining through, do not expect a response from me on this or any other thread. I may simply choose to call you what you are....troll. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 5:14:40 PM | its all in the soul about that ages they are going to be having a rough time dating at that age they are knocked up and you can see no wonder the because at that age the flag needs to be raised and thats a deal :modhammer: breaker and for the long term affect it will have a impact on a realtionshipas they marriage is over and done with its a miracale that jaxi is not hear giving me a hard time but in the end at that age they arent willing to have more kids i would suggest in the long term affect you can expect guys to away from a suition there was a post of a woman with 6 kids now thats alot off bagagge to handle you can except to raised the red course people will run from people like that  | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 5:28:34 PM | Maybe because women in that age group are hotter than their older counterparts and thus get laid more
Ok seriously. I had my daughter at 19. Why? I was a foolish naive young lady, and had the "it wont happen to me" mindset. I was not on the pill, as my dear old traditional catholic mother thought the pill was evil (her church believed that it was a form of abortion, after my first child i told her "i love you but stick your beliefs on birth control where the sun dont shine, i as a woman in this day and age have the right to enjoy a satisfying sex life AND take responsibility to ensure i dont get pregnant until i WANT to, the two are not mutually exclusive.)
I was gypsying around the globe and at that time in Hawaii, and met a strapping man from my hometown, we struck up conversation, we kissed, he told me i was beautiful he wanted to sleep with me, etc etc etc,
it was a beautiful night, my pheromones or hormones or whatever you call them were kicked into high gear, he was devastatingly handsome, yeah i slept with him with out any protection. The whole "fairytale" like moment of making love in hawaii with the waves crashing felt so right, at that moment.
I did inquire about a condom, he mumbled something about "babygirl im gonna pull out you dont worry aout a thing:.
Now at my age NOW i would laugh my ass of and then drop kick him for even suggesting a thing, but i was just not using my smarts!
Now i dont know if plan B was available back then, if it was i had not heard of it.
had it been available and/or myself AWARE of the plan B, i would have DEFINATELY took it.
Because the "morning after" i was sick as a dog with worry.
How could i be so STUPID? What will in tell my parents? How will i make it in life if i have a baby this young?
Well a week later i headed home, 2 weeks later "baby daddy"came back home as well and we saw each other a few times, lo and behiold my worst fear came true i got 2 pink lines on one of those home test pee on a stick thingies.
He informed that he had NO desire to be a father, and that he had girlfriends all over the world and i was craxzy if i thought he was going to settle into some little domestic life with me (glad he did because i met the true love of my life 4 years later.)So there i was, a young single pregnant mom to be at age 19.
I am not proud of myself for GETTING pregnant so young, no. I was quite ashamed of myself, and the dissapointment in my parents and grandparents eyes made me want tio crawl in a hole and die. i AM very proud of myself for handling it well. I swallowed my pride and asked my mother for help with babysitting, I worked worked worked and handled my money well, took classes on computers so i could go for a county job down the road, worked in a restaurant, stayed after work learned to bartend (not glamorous but got me the cash flow to start making my money work for me, moved on to a higher earning bar gig, later went to work for the county then a radio station ), i gave my child a great life, we lacked for nothing, even with my young age.
And as much as i love love love my daughter, yes i WOULD have taken a plan B if i had known about it. (not sure if it was availabale in 1999 though? anyone know?) | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 2/5/2009 6:33:46 PM | Old-fashioned values = old enough to bleed, old enough to breed, lol. Women used to have kids when they were fourteen; they still do today. So many single mom's aged 18-22??? Maybe there's a lot of guys ****ing chicks without condoms and not taking any responsibility for their actions?
Maybe this generation is thinking twice before having an abortion? I really can't answer that, but I do know there are plenty of 18-22 year olds without kids, and perhaps you should focus on chasing them rather than worrying about the "single mothers so young on this website... perfectly content being a mother at such a young age." I'm just happy they didn't abort em! | |
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