| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 10:33:42 AM | That's BS... you don't need to be mature to get married or to have a baby or go to war for your country. So the idea that young single moms have babies because they are "mature" is bull crap
No, you don't need to be mature to step into those positions. But I've rarely met a person who did any of them for long without gaining maturity. I personally don't care if a parent was mature when they conceived. I just hope they grow the hell up at some point, and fairly quickly at that. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 10:42:10 AM |
No, you don't need to be mature to step into those positions. But I've rarely met a person who did any of them for long without gaining maturity. I personally don't care if a parent was mature when they conceived. I just hope they grow the hell up at some point, and fairly quickly at that.
They wouldn't have to grow up fast if they didn't jump into being a mom so early in thier lives. What's the problem with living out your teens and early twenties without being thrown into motherhood? Go to college, get a job, buy a house, find a nice guy, then have a baby... that's what I call mature. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 10:51:10 AM | What's the problem with living out your teens and early twenties without being thrown into motherhood?
What's the problem with not if your children are healthy and well cared-for? Does it personally offend you in some way?
Go to college, get a job, buy a house, find a nice guy, then have a baby... that's what I call mature.
That's all well and good, but that's your subjective definition of maturity. Not the gold standard. We all have our own personal definition and our idea of the way life *should* be, and your business is to follow your own standard and do your best to impart it to your children. And that's about it.
Not to mention that 90% of the time (and I just made that statistic up), young people accidentally get pregnant because they aren't mature enough to take the proper precautions to prevent pregnancy. So waiting for maturity is a moot point. It goes hand in hand with poor sex education and the declining rate of young people practicing abstinence.
Such is life. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 11:10:39 AM |
What's the problem with not if your children are healthy and well cared-for? Does it personally offend you in some way?
Not at all, but it seems to offend you that I don't see things the way you do. That's your demon, not mine.
Go ahead and defend your decisions and what has happened in your life and the life of other young moms, but it won't change how I feel. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 11:16:45 AM | Not at all, but it seems to offend you that I don't see things the way you do. That's your demon, not mine.
Go ahead and defend your decisions and what has happened in your life and the life of other young moms, but it won't change how I feel.
My point was exactly the opposite - I don't care how you feel.
You're more than allowed to share your opinions, but if they're illogical, I'm more than allowed to point it out. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 11:22:47 AM |
You're more than allowed to share your opinions, but if they're illogical, I'm more than allowed to point it out.
Point out what exactly? You've pointed out nothing.
You've pointed out that you don't agree with what I say because you yourself are young single mom. Your defending yourself, that's understandable. Retract the claws. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/7/2009 1:06:42 PM | Point out what exactly? You've pointed out nothing.
No, once again, I have no qualms with your opinions. But just because that's what YOU think is right, doesn't mean it's right for anyone but yourself. It's nice to say there's no problem waiting, but that doesn't mean there IS a problem with not waiting. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/8/2009 1:14:35 PM | | Because young people are dumb! not just the girls but the little boys that knock them up way to soon. Starting familys way to soon,and no hope of making it last when off to such dead end starts. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/8/2009 4:32:11 PM | | i was 18 when i had my daughter..... and i love being a mom just cuz we are young does not mean we should not be a parent ..... so no i disagree wit what u are saying about single moms i raised my daughter by myself i am 22 now and she is 3 and just cuz i am young does not mean i don't know how to be a single loving mom....... | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/8/2009 5:13:34 PM |
It's disturbing to me at least to see so many single mothers so young on this website and they seem perfectly content being a mother at such a young age. Maybe it's just me and my old fashioned views of having kids after say 25. What do you people think?
some will be quite happy to see that you have not chosen to reproduce  | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/9/2009 4:15:04 PM | im actually disgusted that this forum has been made!!
Ive been reading through this, your basically saying all young parents live off the system, have had a poor bringing up and shouldnt be allowed to have children!
Im 20 yrs old, i have a 2 yr old daughter and i am pregnant with my second daughter.
I got pregnant when i was 17, yes protection was used, and no it obviously never worked that time. I dont believe in abortion, simply for the fact, if you can have sex you should deal with the consquences of your actions. I raised my daughter by myself for a yr before i met my current partner. My daughter doesnt want for anything and is a lot better behaved than children of older parents. i "lived" off the system to further my education! to gain qualifications. i never had a poor up bringing, i have been educated all my life in a private school and come from a very wealthy family. i was taught right from wrong and yes i made a mistake, but i dealt with my actions and decided its not in my hands to chose who lives or dies!
Whilst i agree there are young parents out there that do spend there lives living off the government and are quite content with the poor quality of life it brings, there are alot of mothers out there like me that are out there with many qualifications, working and doing there best to look after there children regardless of there age.
My second child was planned, and we are both working and supporting our families. so there is absolutely nothing wrong with having children at a young age as long as you can provide for them and care for them in a loving way.
Alot of you that have commented on here are very narrow minded, it is disgusting to see how you people think. What does it matter to you that there are young people out there with children. and why the age range of 18-22? unless i am mistaken, you are legally an adult at 18 so it should not be judged upon.
Why hasnt a group been started about the middle aged people that sit on their arses in the jobcentres all day, whinging about their dole money. Old people whinging that they are so hard done by. If you take a look at the jobcentre website you will find that not only do the pensioners get there pension, they get winter fuel payments and cold weather payments. and you may argue that they have paid there stamp for all this, but so have i, what is going to be waiting for us young people when we come to retire.
You have idealistic view... buy a house... house prices are extortionate, some are fortunate to be able to get the mortgage, but others even as part of a couple are simply not earning enough money for even a deposit.
So why dont you get a grip, stop arguing about what you think is right and just deal with what happens around you. If your not involved in it, what position do you have to comment? | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/9/2009 7:31:16 PM | I am a single mom who is 23. I became a single mom when I was only 21. It was not a choice I made. My son's father was killed in an auto accident. Does that make me a hore because I have a child and i'm young? My son has been ill ever since he was born and i've never not taken care of him. I take care of my son all by myself, and I think any woman OR man who takes care of thier child and raises them right should be congradulated.  | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/9/2009 8:20:47 PM | I agree...I'm 18 and I have a 2 year old daughter. YES I HAD HER WHEN I WAS 16. No, it was not what I had planned for me life...me and the father were together for 3 years and then broke up after she turned one yeah it didnt work out but o well. I've managed to support my daughter her entire life. I've made it through high school and now Im in college. I've done what many can't achieve. The problem with our society is that we are so quick to judge others before looking at whats in our own back yard. Quite frankly I don't see why anybody should worry about it. If its not what you choose for your life or if its something you don't agree with then that is your belief but is it necessary to make a forum about others life decissions I really don't think so. Lets all worry about what we have going on in our own life before we go putting down people and their ways of life when you know absolutely nothing about it. Yes being a single mom is hard. Being a young mom is hard but I've seen single mothers and young mothers being better parents then married couples or older parents. It happens. And I think people need to step back and ask where some of the men may be in these situations?? Why not start a topic on why men can't commit or take their coat off and manage to stay a while instead of running of scared. There are many scenarios/ ways of life that you and myself know nothing about so lets just keep our mouths shut.
Opinions are like a**holes...everybody has one! | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/11/2009 9:38:30 AM | | OK.... let me jump on this train... being a single mother of TWO and I am 22 yrs of age... I must say that I was not mature when I conceived my children. I was partying, being wild, and going down the wrong path. yes I was irresponsible I will own up to that and I will own up to not being mature at all.... I actually think right before I found out I was preggo I said "I WILL NEVER HAVE KIDS I HATE THEM" so I had my first one... continued going to college and watched my self grow into a mature woman although I still had my immature moments. I got engaged and had a wedding planned for October of 2008. I got pregnant again before we got married. I saw that I did not like the man he was...something opened up my eyes once I had my second child and saw I did not like the way he treated the kids. He was not very loving towards them at all. So I decided to leave him. I am now a single mother that is doing every thing absolutely on my own. no help... I work full time, go to college full time and love my kids with all my heart. I don't even go out any more because I much rather go to the park and play with my kids so that I can hear their laughter and see the joy it brings to them. So I must say that motherhood grew me into a very mature woman at my young age. Everyone tells me that I am one of the most mature young mothers they have met. I just wish other young mothers would grow up too.... I see it every day and it bothers me but hey what can I do?/ | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/12/2009 10:27:05 AM | | Umm bout this. I hate people like you who look down on us young parents... In your second comment you said something about "not being fully adult".. 18 is an adult the last time I heard.. I can guarantee you that since I've been 18 when my first son was born I was the best damn father type out there, I can honestly say that about myself because I got compliments on it in public.. Do you have any kids? NOPE so until YOU get the gift of becoming a REAL man then you can come back on here and talk. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/12/2009 1:39:36 PM | | My mother taught me right from wrong. I had a good head on my shoulders, I was going to college, then getting married, and after that kids. But I met this amazing guy when I was 15, and the pressure to have sex was huge. At 16 I found out I was pregnant, and thought my world had come to an end. I kept my child, finished school and eventually went to college. I am still with the same man....we've been married 2 years and have a good life. We now have 2 children...one is 9 and the other is 2. Some people plan to have children early and some don't. Some are able to make a good life for their children, and some might not be able to. Why judge what age they are? Are you saying because I had my first child at such a young age that makes me a bad person, or a bad mother. Yes I might of needed help from the system at first, but they helped me get my life together. I am now a nurse and can support my family comfortably with no help. Don't judge people in a group, everybody is different!!! I'm sure their are things about you, that people question and don't understand!!!!! | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/12/2009 9:23:38 PM |
I hope it's equally disturbing to you when you consider that many of those single mothers and children were abandoned by the fathers who probably don't pay support.
Nope, checked the rules and this is the way it goes! I know I know. It doesn't seem fair, but hey those are the rules.(jk) | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/12/2009 11:10:12 PM | There are a lot of young parents because sex is cool. Sex is everywhere so when two people do the do stuff happens. Sex is a shared resposability in the wrong hands it can be lethal. Check the warning label STD,Pregnant,Turned out, to name a few.
You should know that if you gonna do it what could happen. When used wisely sex is the shit, no runs ,no drips, no errors, no drama. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/13/2009 2:33:56 PM | | we are single mothers because the fathers are to immature to stand up to there responsibilites and stand by the mums. instead of slaggin the mums off because there single why not be nasty about the men? cos most of the time its the mans fault. at least the mum is supporting and loving her child and is always there for it. praise them instead. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/14/2009 6:51:02 AM | I had my son when i was 23 and i became a single parent one month after he was born!
So why are their so many young single parents? I think that is a silly question, the fact of the matter is the relationship didn't work out!!
Yes in an ideal world we would all be married before we have our children but funny enough thats not always how it goes!! And lots of marriages break down too, I mean i could have been married at 23 and still ended up a single parent it wouldn't have made a difference!
We don't always choose to be single parents or plan it to work out this way but unfortunately it happens so get over it! | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 3/14/2009 9:15:57 AM | | I agree with what you are saying. I was 19 when I became pregnant with my son, and I turned 20 two months before I had him. (He is now 15.) I admit I was extremely naive and unprepared. BUT, I have grown up and matured a lot in the years since I had him, and I have no regrets. I also only have him, because I know what it's like to be a single parent. I have worked full time since right before I had him, and now I am in school part time too. But, unfortuneately, not all young parents like myself ever fully mature. Some view the system like an 'entitlement' program. That's why they put term limits on welfare. At least here in NY they did. | |
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| Why are there so many young single mothers aged 18-22?
Posted: 5/14/2009 9:47:59 PM | My hats off to all the Young Single Mom's out there.
It takes a huge Heart, a lot of gut's and determination, and LOVE. to over come attitudes of others like the one posted by this guy. In my opinion he should pull his head out of his A**, breathe some fresh air. It's because of people like him, that add to the enormous difficulty of raising a child at a young age, that resault in young mothers having low self-esteem because of societies pissy attitude towards this issue.
Instead of asking why there's so many...MAYBE .... he should try asking how he can help.
I am a single man with no children, AND I AM AMAZED AT THE LOVE, COMPASSION AND ABILITIES OF YOUNG MOTHERS WHO WANT NOTHING MORE THEN TO TRY THERE BEST TO GIVE THE BEST TO THIER CHILDREN!!
Please ignore all the jrks out there, hold your head high, for you are raising our future!
God Bless everyone of you.........................................
Sincerely, Tim | |
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