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 mel822
Joined: 8/17/2009
Msg: 51
She's Too Into You!Page 3 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
I so agree with this comment! Why is it that we have to change how we respond to men when we are the ones who have what they want?? Men should be happy to have a woman look at them much less be into them too much??
 mel822
Joined: 8/17/2009
Msg: 52
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 4:17:18 PM
Actually it means she only wants you for sex, I would call it a compliment considering the outfit your wearing!! Men have so much to learn about women
 green.apple
Joined: 8/20/2009
Msg: 53
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 4:17:31 PM
" What is it that a gal does who is "too into you" that makes it a turn off for you? "

Men are natural-born chasers and hunters. It's lost when the girl is totally available.
 Thebestbeancounter
Joined: 10/11/2006
Msg: 54
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 4:26:00 PM
Girls who don't understand the concept of alone time.. as in, my own time without her around me.
 unique1011
Joined: 9/16/2009
Msg: 55
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 4:39:28 PM
A guy into me too much is not only turn-off but also "scary"
 LOVESTRUCK_wannabe
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 56
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 4:55:54 PM
When you start referring to her as Rose (as in 'Two and a Half Men') instead of by her real name.
 Disposablehero38
Joined: 8/19/2009
Msg: 57
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 5:33:57 PM
I'm a very secure man and infact can be a bit**** if I don't watch myself. Saying that I don't think a person can really be too into a guy as long as it's not to the point of being attached to the hip 24/7 and can still have some go out with buddies time. If it's a person you're truly into you look forward to that time and those calls from them
 soflnighteagle
Joined: 8/12/2009
Msg: 58
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 9:45:28 PM
The biggest thing is the constant desire for contact. We as men really don't see the need to talk everyday, there just isn't that much going on in our lives. Ummmm well I went to work and then I drove home and you called. See not much there, a couple contacts a week on the phone, a date or two during the week and we're good. Also when the woman wants constant reassurance that we like and love them. This unending demand that we be together will drive us apart faster than anything else.
 Minau
Joined: 9/2/2007
Msg: 59
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 10:15:53 PM
If someone is “too into you”, then you’re not a match; it is just another instance of one-sided affection, IMO. The amount of elation/annoyance derived from someone being “into you” is directly proportionate to how much you are “into them”. If you’re not into them, then they are deemed to be needy, clingy, desperate, and a whole slew of other unsavory adjectives. If, however, you’re into them, then their hair is spun with golden harp strings from heaven; their voice is a lyrical sonnet; and their farts smell like warm Cinnabons.

Perceptions of being "too into you" is correlated with the level of attraction you have for the other person. If you are not that into the other person their behaviors may appear needy, clingy...however, if you were into them the exact same behaviors would be welcomed and stimulate good happy feelings for the person. I had an ex that had a shrine of me...turn off/scary...no...we were in a long term relationship that I was happy in and hence had no impending feeling to run like hell...didn't really think anything of it actually...he had a schlew of pictures of me right beside his dog...I figured it was a compliment actually...the two things he loves most :)
 crisscrim
Joined: 7/6/2009
Msg: 60
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 10:25:36 PM
the only way to answer your question is to pose this question to you.

he is too into you why?

what are some reasons a man is too into you once you can answer that you will have your own answer.
 Disposablehero38
Joined: 8/19/2009
Msg: 61
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 10:34:21 PM

The biggest thing is the constant desire for contact. We as men really don't see the need to talk everyday, there just isn't that much going on in our lives. Ummmm well I went to work and then I drove home and you called. See not much there, a couple contacts a week on the phone, a date or two during the week and we're good. Also when the woman wants constant reassurance that we like and love them. This unending demand that we be together will drive us apart faster than anything else.


I disagree if it's a person we truly care for, we desire the females contact greatly. We'll find something to talk about with them for the simple fact of speaking with them. Also as men we need to be ready to reassure a woman of her importance in our lives. It's time to let the "rules of dating" fall by the side and be the men we can all be. Treat her with respect, show her you care, let her know how you truly feel, make her feel as special as you truly see her when all your guy friends aren't around. If you do that and it's not enough then you gave it your all and it wasn't meant to work....
 ~Kyn~
Joined: 8/24/2009
Msg: 62
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 10:57:03 PM
She's Too Into You!


I find its the opposite way around.

Last guy I was seeing would email me 3 or 4 times a day... send me random chats during work hours... phone me on just about every break he had at work... ring me when he got home and tell me what was going on and why... and visit 3 or 4 times a week ontop of it...

On his way over... he'd send me a text from every freakin intersection he went through and from the driveway when he finally got to my house... umm... yeah...

When he went away on his "boys" weekend and rang me everynight and emailed me once a day ontop of it with the pics... I was thinking wtf? you're supposed to be doing "man stuff" not checkin in like Im your parole officer

Guess he was really realllllly "into" me...lol...

"too into you" that makes it a turn off for you?

Didnt bother me... I thought it was kinda cute... even if a little strange. He obviously was just one of those men that like to touch base frequently during the day and we were never stuck for conversation... no "awkward" moments of silence.
My ex hubby used to be similar.

If I cant have that much contact with somebody without them doing my head in... there's no chance we'd make it married.
 ChancesRMD
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 63
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/24/2009 11:09:32 PM

What is it that a gal does who is "too into you" that makes it a turn off for you?


Too much too soon.

If she is saying I Love You, let's move in together or talking marriage too soon it would make me question either her sanity or motives. How soon is too soon? That's another thread, but to make the point let's say one date.

For example the thread where the guy was going to move from Colorado to Alaska for a girl he spent all of 5 days with. That would have scared the cinnabons crap out of me. It may not be the end all, but it would definately lock up the brakes.
 whatsallthis
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 64
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 4:39:31 AM

There are guys that make the same mistakes.


You got that right. You hear women complaining constantly that “he doesn’t pay enough attention to me” or “he isn’t very affectionate”. When you try to accommodate them, then you are “needy” or “smothering” them. If you back off, then you are “using them for sex”.



Well, according to the best seller "Why Men Love B1tches" no man truly appreciates someone that is always available for them when they call, automatically brings you soup when you are sick or enthusiastically jumps into bed every time when in a real relationship with you.


Women do this?!?!? Not in my world! I always knew I was missing something.
 CapriciousJane
Joined: 4/12/2008
Msg: 65
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 6:49:20 AM

In the end their relationships suffer because enough is never enough. No matter how available, accomodating or pleasing the people in their life are, it is never enough to meet their high expectations or satisfy their constant need for attention and control.


Eve hit the nail on the head. This my experience, anyways. It's all about needing attention and control.

I had to cut contact with a man this summer because of this exact behavior. We had seen each other everyday for two weeks straight. I felt ill one day, and said I didn't have the energy for going out...I was actually going to stay home for a night! He sent me a text saying "I feel like you're avoiding me!"

WTF?

NEXT!
 PiggyT
Joined: 9/14/2009
Msg: 66
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 6:50:48 AM
If I turn around and all I can see is her high heels sticking out of my arse.... she is too into me.
 MetDBlck
Joined: 1/18/2009
Msg: 67
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 7:37:04 AM
As a poster said a few up, it's about attention and control and (in my opinion) perception of the relationship and an "ideal, good relationship".

From my experience (which could just be down to me really) the major thing I looked back on after dating a few girls who I would have said "Too much too soon" was their lack of reflection/observation on themselves, me and what "we" were doing.

I see a relationship as a continual exchanging of emotional balances between the involved, because they feel desire and happiness for eachother and it just turns out that way. There's less asking and more intuition (perhaps because they found out the facts beforehand prior to getting hotter and heavier). There's less viewing of "criteria to make them like me" and more actually looking at the person.

I guess what i'm trying to say is it's less objective and more subjective?

For example, one of the girls I dated would ask my opinion on anything before she did it, no elements of suprise. It could actually be cute and very sweet turning up at my work just as I finish for an evening bite, but instead she'd have to repeatedly bring up the idea of it, and continually check "would this be ok? will it make you happy?"

I would go as far as to say in an ironic sense, the neediness factor is a result (sometimes) of people actually having a selfish approach to their relationship, they just go about it the opposite way. They do what they do because their only objective is for obvious appraisal from their SO because "that is what a good relationship is" and this in turn makes them feel good. Their primary concern is how to make themselves feel better in the relationship by trying to make you happy.

In reality it's mostly harmless.

I disagree with the people who say "all it means is the man/girl is not as into the other person, else it'd be fine". I could be just as into someone as they are me, but this does not change the fact that certain ways of "wooing" me or being with me I view as distasteful to others, which will CAUSE me to not be as into them. It doesn't start that way though. That's like saying your friends could never really piss you off, because they're your friend. Which is false, even thought you may be very very attached to someone it does not mean that you do not have a difference of character/opinion which can sometimes cause a rift, it just means that your friendship is strong enough to cause you to see the trivial nature of the spat vs the friendship.

Like if a guy/girl likes their needy SO enough, they will probabley try to communicate with them to solve it, if too much damage has not been done to their perception of that person through the emotional bulldozing already.
 flyin squirrel
Joined: 5/25/2009
Msg: 68
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 7:42:28 AM

I kinda think if anybody thinks that anyone is "too into" them it is basically just because they aren't into that person at the same level (at least not yet anyway) ??????


This is completely true....timing ,timing,timing...timing is everything!
And such a delicate balance of power.....ahhh dating!
 elenic
Joined: 5/30/2009
Msg: 69
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 7:48:26 AM
Yes there are gusy that make this mistake too. I just got out of relationship where he smothered me at first with attention . Some woman call this sweeping me off my feet. Very intense at first. And I guess I was swept up. He proggresively wanted to spend most weekend days together Friday-Sunday. Calling several times a day. At first I was flattered, then litted concerned it was too much , but after some time I just gave in and figured he really was that into me I would go with it . Then, when he told me he loved me I thought well he really must wiht this amount of attention and seemed pretty wrapped up in me.

But after 5 months suddenly he came to the realization he was simply attracted to me and blinded by passion and needed more space . Laughable that he was asking for more space when he initiated the amount of lack of space to begin with.

Needless to say it's SO over and did not end very ambically.

It really taught me to beware of those who come on like gangbusters in the start of a relationship because they will soon fizzle out. They run too hot and then too cold.

Maintain a balance. Don't have to spend all your time together or calling 24/7 or textin.g. I personally like someone who gives me attention, calls often and little texts just to say hi. someone who likes to spend time with me but within reason..... it has to be maintable. and not suck up your entire life.

Also need to give each other room to breath, pursue hobbies, own interest etc.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 70
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She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 7:48:50 AM
I'm with BigDaddyJinx on this one only I recently met a guy like that. I'm surprised he didn't have us married by the end of the week.

He cut it off 2 days after meeting cause I wouldn't jump at the phone or doorbell. I wasn't ready for a home visits either. Yet, I still got a criticizing e-mail yesterday "he can see why I don't date". Buddy I don't want to date your kling on unemployed butt cause your too clingy after one meet. If I don't date it's my biz anyway.
 REDDRAGON.
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 71
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 7:55:35 AM

Scarred Out Of Your Wits?

Some guys like it when a girl draws blood from his back with her French manicured nails. And some girls, when doing the doggy, like to be spanked till their buttocks burn pink. But if the recipient of said "passionate" punishment isn't the one getting off, this kind of thing falls under the category of branding. As in, "This is my man and I've created a hickey self-portrait on his neck to show you that he's taken."



 dysfunction_junction
Joined: 7/17/2008
Msg: 72
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 7:58:07 AM
when someone is "too into you" it's because they're emotionally insecure and therefore needy. oy vey, always with the constant validation! when they get it, they over-analyze it just to be sure you really mean it. and when they don't get it, they over-analyze some more to the point of panic. aaaaaah!!!

::omgnoz::
 whatIlikeaboutyou
Joined: 3/21/2009
Msg: 73
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 8:11:51 AM

Guys try to be better men and strive to be gentlemen and be honest. If you do, that is one more good person in the world. That is how it works one at a time.


Ah, the voice of reason. Thank you.

Guys complain incessantly about all the bitter jaded women who have bad attitudes towards men. Well, don't blame us. You're the ones who ****ed up probably a nice gal or two. If you want to be users, abusers and womanizers expect a trail of wary, angry women behind you.

If more GOOD GUYS stood up against this behavior maybe things would improve for us all.

Oh no but that's no fun is it. Ok, then go buy yet another book on how to bed a million women and see what the result is for everyone huh? And tell yourself you're just being a guy and doing what comes naturally (snort). Then don't forget to blame the feminists for the fatherless kids and the breakdown of family values while you are at it ok. Now go forth and conquer and see if you enjoy all the damaged goods you are left surrounded by.
 elenic
Joined: 5/30/2009
Msg: 74
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 8:21:48 AM
Someone who is "into you" at first can be very flattering. but after awhile it can bring the entire relationship off balance. People do need room to breath, be themsevles.

You can get lost in relationship. I can attest to this. Soemone was I was dating came on very strong a first. Wanted to spend all his free time with me, called several times a day. He kind of took over my life for several months.

I wish I had the sense to back it off early on.

But pretty much as soon as I was on board and as into him he did the cool down. Played hot and cold. Unsure if he really loved me or not.

I now seen someone who comes on so strong a real red flag. It's simply not normal or healthy. If you fall for it either you get someone who is very controlling or someone who likes to play games with your emotinons or someone who is too needy.

I think both parties should maintain balance and give space. It's easy to get caught up especially if you haven't dated in a while. Just take it slow and that seems to be the best way to avoid problems.
 Mahogany-Rush
Joined: 7/23/2009
Msg: 75
She's Too Into You!
Posted: 9/25/2009 4:33:54 PM

What is it that a gal does who is "too into you" that makes it a turn off for you?
on the third date, she's introducing you to her maid of honor, and asking who is your best man?
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