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avante
| | Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 28 | |
| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 1/13/2009 11:50:49 PM | I have one advice for you.....Keep yourself busy with work and do what you enjoy doing as always. Vent out your feelings to friends that are very supportive of your views if you are feeling down about your ex. You gotta love yourself and have respect for yourself. When your ex attempts to come back to you, Just leave her exactly where she is at. Tell her to her face or person to person this " You know what? You don't deserve me at all....I just realize that we were just not right for each other." believe it or not, that would hurt your ex more than anything. I did it and they were very hurt. P.S., Don't look back, move forward and just say next!.......smiles. Good luck to you bro!
mark aka Avante | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/15/2009 9:49:02 PM | | I guess it's just curiosity to see how quickly she's moved on from the relationship and you're probably curious to see if she has met anyone new which maybe posted on facebook. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/16/2009 11:53:52 AM | | You just have to delete them from your friends to be honest. That's really the only way you can truly move on in my opinion. Although I kicked my ex out, I still see his profile on mutual friends pages and the best thing I ever did was to make it where I cannot see anything. You should try it...it's very helpful in getting over the ex's. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/16/2009 5:55:15 PM | | Ummm...I don't know. I figure once I'm/they are done I don't want to know. So, facebook, myspace whathaveyou stalking is not an issue for me. Do you really want to expose yourself to more pain? Eventually you just might read something that is going to hurt. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/16/2009 7:06:21 PM | So at this odd moment that I know it is the final breakup, my new ex chooses to put his profile on PoF and then peruse mine. There's a history there with PoF and us and his exes who would stalk me here. NOW what was he doing?
I called him and asked him to please remove his profile. I also asked him to do me the favor of changing his number and email and moving away too LOL.
If she takes pity on you, she'll block you at your request. If not, you are going to have to get support of friends and make the looking more complicated. Change some settings on your computer like removing the bookmark to her profiles and these sites and if you can't help looking at her, set aside an appointment time each day complete with a timer. When you want to look, remind yourself that it's not the time, but the time is coming. Try the end of the day, then follow it up with web sites like PoF or something that uplifts you or makes you laugh. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/17/2009 6:14:16 AM | I have the problem of this as well, her profile is blocked to me, however she writes a lot on her friends walls and I want to see those messages just so I can know whats going on in her life.
I think the reason we do this, or at least the reason I do is that I still love her, and its unbearable for me to not know as much about her as possible because of this. I mean how do you stop yourself from a) loving a girl you've had a long history with? b) hurting yourself when you find out that she no longer loves you? c) desiring to know as much as possible about her?
Bah, I guess were just doomed to hurt ourselves! At least in the short run. | |
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rankal
| | Joined: 1/21/2009
Msg: 35 | |
| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/17/2009 12:42:03 PM | Sounds like the break-up wasn't something that was 100% mutual. Continuing to look at her stuff is only going to drive you crazy. The best way to get over someone, from what I've found, is to let yourself get angry at them for what happened. Eventually the anger subsides, and you'll realize just how much time you wasted and how much they weren't really worth it, and you move on with your life.
Just my $0.02.
Good luck. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/17/2009 2:02:35 PM | | I understand totally. It doesn't do the soul good for all the torment. I found my ex's myspace and seems for some reason she can't make the house payment but can go on cruises, over night trips renting a cabin in the mountains, buying expensive purses, blah blah blah. Someone's suggestion of having her hide the profile seems like a good idea to me. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/17/2009 2:39:10 PM | im glad im not the only one that looked at my ex facebook profile a lot. phew i am normal, lol. The texting bewteen us ceased so i took to looking at his FB profile but the thing was he never went on!! Don't know if he was avoiding me or he just got bored with FB.
In the end after a nasty episode between us I deleted him off FB. Thing is since then I have tried to re add him as a friend (crazy I know), this was nearly 4 weeks ago. He hasnt accept the friends request or declined it - its still pending on his FB account.
Part of me do not want him to accept it as I don't want to go back to looking at his profile again and getting upset of what I may see........ | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/17/2009 3:15:39 PM | Viewing profiles / blogs / websites are all just online versions of driving by your ex's house to see if there is a new car parked out front. It's gonna hurt regardless if you are behind the wheel or behind the keyboard doing it. And it ain't healthy behavior.
If you can avoid it...leave the profiles alone. It only hurts you, the viewer. Takes effort, I know, but it only prolongs the healing process...
My two cents (well, maybe three)
Paul ;) | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 4/17/2009 5:04:50 PM | | Shoot her a message and say you're stalking her and can't help yourself. Chances are she'll make her profiles private and/or block you. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 7:57:34 AM | you gotta stop man.
i had the same problem... he dumped me and immediately took me off his top friends- so as revenge lol i deleted him as a friend... which didn't phase him in the least.
and then of course i couldn't stop looking at his stupid myspace status. everytime i looked i felt worse and worse- especially if it said something like "had an amazing weekend..." or something remotely positive.
plus! once i had sort of gotten over him. about two months later... i made the mistake of looking again to sort of test myself to see if i still cared.
haha. well i did... and it set me right back at the start of my recovery.
:(
So be strong! don't look... | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 9:11:11 AM | First of all... [BIG HUGS] because you need them.
Don't be too hard on yourself, it's only been two months. Don't burden yourself with never looking at her profile (which she should have blocked from you, I think she's just being vindictive) ever again, just don't look at it today. It's only 24 hours without knowing what she's up to, you'll do that easy, won't you?
So many of us have been there. I dumped my LCB ex at the end of Feb. The other week I was going through some stuff and found a letter from him. I read it; I shouldn't have, it just made me feel like ten tons of shite when I thought of all the lies he was telling at the time.
It happens, but just try to be strong for 24 hours. You'll surprise yourself that you can do it, and then when you do I'll bet you'll be able to go 48 hours, don't you think? :o) | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 10:59:54 AM | It's been two months for me as well and I had the same problem.
I did the "drunken monkey dog of over-exposure kung fu technique."
I looked at the profile so often and so much that eventually I got sick and tired of seeing her face. When she put up a song that almost broke me, I looked some more. When she never bothered to change her status, I looked some more. I just got so tired of making myself feel like crap, that I quit doing it and now my life is almost as awesome as if I had a Slap-Chop and two Shamwows! | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 12:25:09 PM | Personally I don't think ex's who have not moved on should be on each others profiles on fb, it is much to painful to know what’s going on with them, and if your anything like me you hold yourself back on your own profile so you don't hurt their feelings.
My most recent ex & I had a really hard time with this one (we also share a child) I had deleted him a few times, but it just seem to cause more grief (which is why we ended being fb friends again), and really since I was not over him till recently it just served to hurt me more than anything else.
Ignorance can be bliss. I am so glad he was the one to delete me this last time, I don’t feel any guilt about taking myself out of his life (I would never take the child out of his life unless that was what his choice was). I do hope he is happy but we are not even friends right now so honestly the less I know the better I feel! | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 2:47:14 PM | kinda funny, I see girls I dated all the time on here.
I just feel bad for whom dates them next, and hope they don't make the same mistakes I do.
just gotta show restraint, and not look at them, because they are part of your past now. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 3:02:27 PM | Hehe--
I've done that -- pray for the guy she's dating now! Still don't know if I want him to make mistakes or not. She was a tough nut...
Its good to see so many others with the same addiction of viewing statuses and profiles. Imagine, she's moved on and her profile now says " How does it feel to be accidently be so complete", and her mood says 'complete' with the rising hearts, and I still check it! Ouch -- Gotta stop... | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 3:04:57 PM | | i feel your pain. i to am going through a very painful breakup, and know exactly what you are going through. my ex also has various internet accounts and it is hard not to visit her profile. i have done exactly what you have done. with one exception, i stay away from anything that will bring me to her profile ( at all costs ). it is extremely hard and takes some self control. but it is more painful to keep visiting her profile than it is not to. so my advise is to just stay away, no matter the temptation. it will get better. i feel your pain man. keep your head up and look foreward to meeting someone new. don't get obsessed whatever ya do. hope this helps. good luck. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/14/2009 10:09:53 PM | It's been almost a year since my ex dumped me, yet I still lurk on her MySpace page.
Why? I keep thanking her for breaking up with me before I found out she was into open relationships.. Not to mention the one blog entry where she's bragging about her obese physique and how everyone wants a piece of her "gluteus maximus". 
Self-confidence is one thing, but being full of yourself is another... | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/15/2009 1:02:03 AM | | Its hard staying facebook enough already. Just get out of the house and off the computer. Unless you have school work to do that is. Get in touch with friends if you haven't already. | |
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| Staying off ex's facebook and myspace
Posted: 7/15/2009 5:53:59 AM | I'll do you one better.
I still had her password to her mailbox and couldn't stay oit of there.
Sh e finally caught on and changed the password and I'm glad she did. I was obsessed with knowing everything that was going on in her life. | |
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