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 flotsam
Joined: 1/20/2007
Msg: 51
If you got your heart's desirePage 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Aha! but is my heart's desire ready for me? lol. My heart's desire is peace, so yeah I'm ready.
 octaviarose
Joined: 7/16/2008
Msg: 52
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 12:44:02 AM
no, absolutely not. Cant organise my way out of a wet paper bag.
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 53
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 2:30:01 AM

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. ~ Rumi

Seems I'm not as ready as I thought. But highly motivated to find and eliminate those barriers as quickly as possible.


Wow, I really like that...But how exactly does one find the barriers within, how would you recognise them?

Good topic by the way, can't believe why people vote to delete such an interesting thread.
 thesilverdevil97
Joined: 8/8/2008
Msg: 54
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 2:38:44 AM
Immortality....

Don't have to worry about it because I will never get it. Ah, to live forever.
 ndulj
Joined: 5/27/2007
Msg: 55
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 4:38:30 AM
My hearts desire is so multi- faceted that it seems that as one part of it comes into focus I put it on hold until I can get the other pieces of the puzzle in place. ~sigh~
I guess I'm just not that adept at juggling
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 56
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 7:41:40 AM

Your task is not to seek for love,
but merely to seek and find
all the barriers within yourself
that you have built against it.
~ Rumi


Wow, I really like that...But how exactly does one find the barriers within, how would you recognise them?

There's a lot of wisdom in a 13th century sufi poet-philosopher, isn't there?
In my experience, to find the barriers - you do nothing. They find you quite effortlessly.

Some of the barriers to love are:
* the walls you have erected; they falsely promise protection and security. However much they manage to block out some hurtful stuff, they equally block out joy from coming in at the other end.

* the illusions about our selves and the world and how the world "should" work .
For starters, try on:
The myth that someone 'right' will come along and our walls will magically come down. The magical thinking that someone 'right' will reach through our walls and 'see' us and rescue us from the prison of our own making. The illusion we have that our walls are us - part of our identity.

* the fears we have and the fears we do not face. The fears we rationalize away as "good sense". Sometimes we have more of a commitment to maintaining our fears than in giving them up as something that doesn't serve us.
 MyLifeAsMe
Joined: 1/26/2009
Msg: 57
No...
Posted: 2/24/2009 7:47:07 AM
...I'm not, to be honest.

At this point, not only would it have to be my hearts desire...which might have happened and I blew it...but it would also have to be so pure and perfect that it overwhelmed me.

Essentially what happened to me most recently is I got what I wanted...or so it seemed...but when my belief of that was shaken...things went downhill. And I cannot honestly say I am in any better a place now than I was then. Working on it...but not there.

Hence I am not searching for a "serious" relationship....I just don't have to faith and fortitude currently to endure the ups and downs...the disappointments....
 ~SparklingRose~
Joined: 10/20/2008
Msg: 58
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 7:48:47 AM
Msg. 57: Great post ItsMargo! (I'm already in conflict over it..lol)

Things that make you go "Hmmm... " ... love 'em.

Copied, and pasted into Word, for mulling over... thank you!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

mylifeasme:

Essentially what happened to me most recently is I got what I wanted...or so it seemed...but when my belief of that was shaken...things went downhill. And I cannot honestly say I am in any better a place now than I was then. Working on it...but not there.

Hence I am not searching for a "serious" relationship....I just don't have to faith and fortitude currently to endure the ups and downs...the disappointments....
Then would that not be your heart's desire? ... To heal from this in once piece, and be in a better place for it?

 heartseekertrue
Joined: 6/24/2008
Msg: 59
If I KNEW my hearts desire....
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:00:59 AM
lol i might recognize her when she sashays out the door!

Truly, one cannot give what one doesn't own.
...nor can one own what one cannot give away.

Are you ready to give away your greatest desire?
...then and only then...you are ready for it....

Need change for your tupence?
err, thats not the change ya meant!
 MyLifeAsMe
Joined: 1/26/2009
Msg: 60
I understand what you are saying...
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:14:08 AM

Then would that not be your heart's desire? ... To heal from this in once piece, and be in a better place for it?


...but no.

I don't feel I have anything to "heal" from per say...I just know that the person I am today is not a person who is ready for my "heart's desire".

I guess is I were to add that I am perfectly prepared and willing to live without my "heart's desire", that might explain it more.

Just because I believe I want something doesn't mean I...

a) Know it will make me happy
b) Know that it is what is best for me
c) Know that it is even possible

Right now...I'm good with an enhanced version of the status quo. I currently don't need anything more than "just a dining and dating companion"...with adult intimacies as well.
 heartseekertrue
Joined: 6/24/2008
Msg: 61
what IS your desire? are you certain????
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:30:49 AM
Its margo; how true. Wisdom is found where you seek her. Always seek her...
the other things will come anyway.

A safe and intentional community...affords the self-scrutiny we each require to tear down these damning defenses.

Do we trust enough to be authentic? Are those within our "safe village"....
"truth-tellers" enough to tell us what we are afraid to hear, or admit, of self?
Will we begin that daunting task? Our own defenses....hem us too close, and dark.
 ~Hello~
Joined: 7/30/2008
Msg: 62
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:33:23 AM
Yup - I've been ready for my hearts desire for a lotta years.
Not sure if I'm ready for what comes next .. once I have realized my hearts desire. It would be a Verrry different world.. the one my heart desires..

There would be Peace.. a spirit of cooperation rather than competition and retaliation.. we would all know that feeling of being Happy, Joyous and Free ..

Thanks for the 'dream sequence' ..
 lonesomerick
Joined: 1/23/2008
Msg: 63
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 9:36:07 AM
ItsMargo, I've read alot of your posts, sometimes we agree, sometimes we disagree.
But your last one was brilliant...thanks and I mean that!

Am I ready? absolutely. I actually got down to writing all my wants and needs in the woman I seek.....some of it even surprised me. I had the whole thing at one time, but she's gone. But I know I'll find it again!
 ~SparklingRose~
Joined: 10/20/2008
Msg: 64
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I understand what you are saying...
Posted: 2/24/2009 11:49:49 AM
Ok, mylifeasme... I think I see where you're coming from now...

Keeping the "Just because I believe I want something..." in context then, in answer to this thread, I would have to say that my own heart's desire is:

To KNOW that it will make me happy. (check)
To KNOW that it is what's best for me. (check)
To KNOW that it is even possible. (check)

All's good right? Except....

Considering anything is possible ... I guess what I, in particular, have yet to discover is: Is it probable ?

** Yep... more of "Things that make you go, " Hmm..."" ... **
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 65
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 11:55:18 AM

There's a lot of wisdom in a 13th century sufi poet-philosopher, isn't there?
In my experience, to find the barriers - you do nothing. They find you quite effortlessly.

Some of the barriers to love are:
* the walls you have erected; they falsely promise protection and security. However much they manage to block out some hurtful stuff, they equally block out joy from coming in at the other end.

* the illusions about our selves and the world and how the world "should" work .
For starters, try on:
The myth that someone 'right' will come along and our walls will magically come down. The magical thinking that someone 'right' will reach through our walls and 'see' us and rescue us from the prison of our own making. The illusion we have that our walls are us - part of our identity.

* the fears we have and the fears we do not face. The fears we rationalize away as "good sense". Sometimes we have more of a commitment to maintaining our fears than in giving them up as something that doesn't serve us.


Beautifully put..Thanks Margo.....
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 66
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 12:00:39 PM
My heart's desire may be what I "want" but is it what I "need" ?...that's why I’m really careful with what I ask for.
 goodgal1
Joined: 11/7/2007
Msg: 67
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 12:08:26 PM
Ok i have to say that i agree with thos eof you who said you have to be ready before you can have your hearts desire. And like a couple of you have posted, "it's like a chain reaction, you have to get right with yourself then everything else will fall in place". I couldn't agree more with that. I just recently learned that lesson. 3 years ago i lost my husband to cancer, a few short months after that (due to a complete lonelyness) I decided i wanted a relationship. I was NOT ready i was a mess personaly. I finally realized i was not going to attract the kind of man i want (or need) untill i was right with myself. So i started working on me. I am now a MUCH happier person and about 3 months ago i met the best man in the worl he truely is my hearts desire! And I am ready for the BIG changes to come with him being part of my life, infact i welcome those changes with open arms.
 MikeM1968
Joined: 11/3/2007
Msg: 68
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 12:21:23 PM

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. ~ Rumi


My hearts desire is to be the best me I can be:

Lord, make me a channel of thy peace
- that where there is hatred, I may bring love
- that where there is discord, I may bring harmony
- that where there is error, I may bring truth
- that where there is doubt, I may bring faith
- that where there is despair, I may bring hope
- that where there are shadows, I may bring light
- that where there is sadness, I may bring joy.

Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted
- to understand, than to be understood
- to love, than to be loved.

For it is by self- forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to eternal life.

Mike
 CynthiaM
Joined: 8/29/2008
Msg: 69
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 7:41:01 PM
Thank you, ItsMargo, that's a very good description of the barriers to love. I'll add mylifeasme/SparklingRoseR’s barrier –
*knowing that it is even possible.

this is the one I struggle with. Although I can't say I've ever had a role-model for what a 'successful' loving relationship looks like, I've been in a few long term relationships that were pretty good for awhile. Until they weren't.

But, I've had a taste of the kind of love that I’ve only imagined and it's almost overwhelmingly scary to think I could have that and either lose it or find it’s just an illusion.

Add in childhood conditioning ('you're not good enough', 'you don't deserve ...' 'don't be pushy') and it's difficult to give up the fear even when I recognize it and know that it doesn't serve any value. But, I’m working on it. Hence the purpose for this thread.

Thank you to everyone who’s posted here (even chocolate muffin man ;-). This helps.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 12/16/2008
Msg: 70
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 7:45:37 PM
Yep. Absolutely.

Though I'm happy exactly as I am right now too. It's all good.
 Ron9
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 71
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:03:38 PM
I’m easy. I think in three tiers (in case I have to lower my hopes)

1. Diane Lane locked in my basement (her husband Josh Brolin might not like that one too much)

2. See Jennifer Love-Hewitt’s bOObs - in person. This might actually happen someday. I am still waiting on her reply to my email (sent it in 1998)

3. A home made meat loaf (one that don’t taste like cardboard - like the one I made)
 2Irish1
Joined: 9/1/2008
Msg: 72
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:12:17 PM
Yo Posters,

I put in my profile

I know some of what I want, some of what I'll accept, and exactly what I do not want...


At this stage in the game for most of us we do have walls. We are afraid of what we wish for.

this is the one I struggle with. Although I can't say I've ever had a role-model for what a 'successful' loving relationship looks like, I've been in a few long term relationships that were pretty good for awhile. Until they weren't.


I hate to tell you..."The Brady Bunch" wasn't real...Every relationship that works...does so...because the couple involved works hard at their relationship....absent of: abuse, drugs, alcoholism, cheating, lack of trust...and a few other absolute deal breakers....most relationships will work...as long as....the couple is committed to working thru the tough times...

But, we all live on easy street So, most relationships fail due to lack of effort on the part of one or both .

My hearts desire is to find another that will realize that I'm not perfection. she isn't either, and non eof our prior relationship were nirvina. Someone who see's the good times as good, and the bad times as temperary.

Just my opine,

Irish

 AngelnGa
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 73
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:34:03 PM
An essential part of life is being open to change. Desires are a givin in us all yet there are many different roads to travel in this journey of life and at times our desires change or become seasoned. Its all about choices yet their are some paths along the way that give us no choice and we can choose to adapt or not. I used to think the world changed around me yet I have learned I have changed with it. My hopes, dreams and values still remain I just smooth them into the new chapters.
 rune3
Joined: 7/13/2006
Msg: 74
If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/24/2009 8:54:34 PM
I held back on posting because I was hoping I'd understand the topic better as more people posted. I don't.

This "heart's desire" idea is peculiar to me.
I don't long for stuff I don't have -- never have.
My heart doesn't desire: it appreciates.
I think I'm rather lucky there.

Change is part of life, so I accept that I can't keep everything like it is right now forever and I like that we get to grow and learn etc -- but I would say that there's no change I'm anxious for. The stuff that is in my life right now is what I desire/appreciate. There is no question of being ready for it. And I've felt this way about my life for a long time: it's just part of my nature, I think. I consider myself fortunate to be made this way. It must be very confusing to be otherwise.
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 75
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If you got your heart's desire
Posted: 2/25/2009 8:47:26 AM
(msg 75) I think you are fortunate rune.

My interpretation of heart's desire is the longing to be with someone who really resonated with me. It is a bit of a paradox in that the longing for something can 'pull' one into looking for it rather than being exactly wherever you are. Or question it if it actually did fall into your lap one fine spring day. Maybe, perhaps, because we attempt to "name" the unknowable. (If I recall correctly, crazy posted something to that effect on an earlier page of this thread, or one similar).

If I am not totally mangling his words, he said something to the effect of how he didn't know what his heart desired until his heart recognized it. I didn't have that wisdom *grins* I always tried to figure out what my heart's desire would be and look for it... which led to questioning and evaluating each potential candidate to see if they measured up to what I thought ought to be the perfect relationship for me.

Silly me, to imagine I could:
1. figure it out ahead of time,
2. "think" my way through something one "feels" their way through

The critical insight for me... it's the relating not the relationship... I learned from you and crazy here in the forums. One relates with people from exactly where ever you are - and either that resonates with you, or not.
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