| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/24/2009 6:03:27 AM | Edit: decided to keep my d@mn mouth shut afterall.
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/24/2009 6:10:16 AM |
Is that really true?
Yes -- It's true CassaGo.
Depending on which part of the country you were/are in, depends on how much you would have heard it. Personally, I heard it a lot. | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/24/2009 6:35:23 AM | Sarah Palin does have a sister. She's the one who married the allegedly abusive state trooper.
The business of opening car doors for women seems to be one of those courtship rituals that dies off quickly once couples are sleeping together--or married.
So what does this say about marriage and/or intimacy?
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/24/2009 7:20:36 AM | We learn manners...whatever.. men/women slam the door because emotions are stronger than manners?
I love wonderful manner...the man gets down on one knee asking a woman...WILL YOU MARRY ME? | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/26/2009 12:35:50 PM | RanRan is back! wrote, "For example, 'I love a good sense of humor' but their profiles are as dry as a bone and as humorless as a root canal."
THAT's why they "love a good sense of humor" ... cuz it's LACKING in their personality so they're hoping their SO will bring that to the relationship!!! 
Molly  | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/26/2009 2:51:35 PM | I do have manners.
MANNERS - as opposed to - playing the *PERFECT GENTLEMAN*. (there's a huge difference) - Manners aren't about showing you value a specific person. Manners are about covering your mouth when you sneeze, excusing yourself from the table, covering your mouth when you burp - excusing yourself after a burp, etc., etc. Manners are about not being disgusting and repulsive to others. Manners are also about holding the door open for elderly or disabled people, helping little old ladies across the street, etc., etc.
No - not- requesting "pull my finger" before farting. Although I've even known many women who did that themselves and would find that funny.
NO - I am NOT always the *perfect gentleman* to every woman. I do not feel every woman is *entitled*. Period. If I've been dating her and we've been hitting it off - then yeah, but not on just anyone. I will try to show *some* gentleman - like behavior on a first date however, the standard holding the door open, pulling the seat out kinda thing.
The expectation that some women have of every man being a perfect gentleman to every woman is as unreasonable as it would be for every guy to expect every woman he's attracted to to have amazing sex with him.
Mike | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/26/2009 6:22:47 PM | | I think manners are very important to men and women. No manners your like two teenagers dating. By the time your in your 40's and 50's you better have manners for all the little things we do around each other. Rules of dating have been stated. If the persons you are dating don't have manners were does the realtionship go ? It better to play by the manner rules then act like a jerk. | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 2:38:32 AM | ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^........................................
Having and showing good manners.. is a thankless "job" at times. But.. I'll continue to have and show those manners.. everytime.
Renaissance Redneck msg #86..
Very rarely have I come across a gentlemen that orders for me.
However.. the few times I have.. I've always stated a very warm thank you afterward. I must admit.. very flattered.. and a bit surprised though. I agree 100% with your decision of an "early departure" as well. I would have felt humiliated. Not with my association of being at the same table.. but.. for "her". She apparently was not brought up in a decent.. warm.. loving.. and most of all.. courteous environment. I feel great pity for someone from those circumstances. Perhaps.. she's someone that will eventually learn manners.. the hard way. Sorry you had to be on the blunt end of her mis-education. But.. those are the possibilities we all face while dating.. right?
Good luck to you! | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 2:44:08 AM | ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^.......................................................
Wooby.. for all the obvious reasons.. I can't go to your profile.. but.. would love to know where that accent of yours is from? I love it! | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 6:18:25 AM | Redarc ~~ All you have to do to get to a hidden profile is sign in on your own account, and click the profile button on the forums. But it wouldn't tell you what you want to know, lol! Grew up in Utah. Live in WV now. WV is beginning to make inroads on the way I talked till I was 55, grin.
And Thanks!
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 8:35:24 AM | She apparently was not brought up in a decent.. warm.. loving.. and most of all.. courteous environment. I think she didn't go out to eat very often, certainly not with a man, and just didn't know how to behave--no sophistication, no class. I've been out to eat with woman friends who are treating and sometimes they do the ordering. Simpler for the waiter if one person does the ordering. | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 9:55:11 AM | I agree with Mike on the difference between manners and being a perfect gentleman.
IMHO, a "Perfect Gentleman" is someone who learned how to act in public in certain company. A "True Gentleman" has good manners that they use ALL the time with EVERYONE, including behind closed doors. I'm not saying he can't get down with the guys and laugh at bawdy jokes, but he won't be yelling from the car at a lovely lady on the sidewalk, even if his buddys are.
... gentleman - like behavior on a first date...
Even after 15 years of marriage I wanted to open the car door for my wife and give her a hand getting out. Though, in perfect honesty, she rarely would wait for me to get around to her side.
I actually prefer to be mannerly all the time. For me, it's just part of my innate personality. Even those that "aren't entited" are treated the same way. It costs me nothing.
-desertgeek | |
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*Don*
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Joined: 1/30/2009
Msg: 113 | |
| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 10:22:31 AM |
I actually prefer to be mannerly all the time. For me, it's just part of my innate personality. Even those that "aren't entited" are treated the same way. It costs me nothing. {msg. 122}
Yes sir, I think that’s the ‘ticket’. And it seems to be something people either have or they don’t have. And if they have manners, it’s part of their innate personality (as you say) and comes out in everything they do. I guess I was fortunate in that it was drilled into me as a kid and has managed to register and stay mostly in my personality today. When I go through a door, I always look who’s following and hold it – it doesn’t matter what gender or whom it is that is following. When I’m in public I have the choice whether to make people feel like chit or try to make them smile a bit. It just doesn’t make sense to me to choose the former. I sat at a streetlight the other day, waiting for an advance green left turn signal from the other direction. There was a lot of traffic at that corner and cars were trying to push their green and make it through the intersection. As soon as our light turned green, the guy beside me shot off the line, right up to the car still clearing the intersection a little late, honking his horn over and over. I just sat there in my lane, not moving, wondering “Why ??”
From what I understand, people have unresolved issues that are bothering them. And they will continue to flex that frustration (as in my green light example, above) unsuccessfully until they finally deal with the real issue that is bothering them. I think that those with manners have learned that taking these issues out on the general public just isn't the way to go.
D | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 12:54:48 PM | Some have commented that there is no point in posting in their profile that they have manners. Sure there is a reason, because it is so rare! For those of us who appreciate and value manners it is one more reason to send an intro email.
Does anyone prefer to be treated like chit? No not normally (there are a few).
Certainly I am different in my own home than when out for an evening with a gentleman, and so would he be different. It is not usual for a husband to pull out the chair for his wife at the kitchen table on a Thursday night, but greatly appreciated when at a restaurant.
Manners, to me, equates to respect for others not just women. I use my manners to hold doors for others, help load groceries into the car for an elderly person who needs help, pay the extra 12 cents a kid needs to 'Super-Size' his fries. Why? Because, in turn I appreciate when people are respectful to me. Maybe, just maybe, they will remember it and use their manners a little more. If not - oh well, I am not a worse person for being who I am. | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 2:18:35 PM |
A political movement, feminism isn't about making men the enemy, but more about ensuring equality in all aspects of societal life, including the workforce.
Equality eh ? So why is it that i would have no manners if i don't open her door or pull out her chair ? Seems to me that i can open my own door and being as how she has two hands, she can open her door equally as well. | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 4:23:17 PM | So why is it that i would have no manners if i don't open her door or pull out her chair ? Seems to me that i can open my own door and being as how she has two hands, she can open her door equally as well.
Manners and whether you have them has little to do with opening car doors or not, as little as this same topic has to do with equality, feminism, or politics.
A gentleman will open a door and a lady will allow it because this is the way they were raised. He may not always open it and she may not always wait for him to do so. Still they are mannered. Opening doors is but one example.
People with far less couth will scoff at this idea. Men with even less than that stand on the sidewalk hollering "Hurry up b**ch, we are gonna be late again" | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 4:44:40 PM | "So why is it that i would have no manners if i don't open her door "
I can open a door for someone. Why can't you? | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 5:21:58 PM | | It wouldn't. However, if this other human is female, and she is of the type that carries on about equal rights under all circumstances (which i believe should be the case), then she can certainly open her own door without crying "no manners" ! | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 8:21:55 PM | Is this the question?
So why is it that i would have no manners if i don't open her door or pull out her chair ?
The answer is that not opening her door does not mean that you do not have manners. It's HOW and WHY you don't open her door that speaks volumes. I don't need to say anything, you have spoken for yourself quite eloquently.
See the "True Believer" thread for more on how our attitude affects us and those around us.
-DesertGeek | |
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| Manners among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/27/2009 11:18:45 PM | | Well I see Society Has really changed in reference to mannerism, well anyone that would not show mutual respect to another person, is very strange to me and not sure I would want to be around that person, should not matter on age at all but how we a raised and the values and morales we show to each other is very important and should really who you are! | |
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| Mannors among the over 45 yr. old
Posted: 2/28/2009 4:15:53 AM | | Yes it happen to me, Coming out of a store a woman was behind me carrying packages and I held the door for her and she said very rudely" I am perfectly capable of doing this myself" Which I replied "I am not doing this because your a woman I am doing this because I am a gentleman" Then she walked off in a huff. I use courtesy towards EVERYONE. Thats how I was raised | |
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