| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 4:58:29 PM | flame me, i don't care.
pure and simple, this is a truely wonderful website for people who are SINGLE to meet other single people. having those in relationships (and from the 8 pages of those defending being in a relationship and being on POF it appears to be an overwhelming amount of womyn,) it really reads like your sticking your 'success' in our face and kind of like being rated/hearing your opinion etc without actually having to be susceptable to trying to meet a potential mate. its hard enough finding people to date, do we have to wade through profile upon profile of people looking for friends?
If its so innocent, and you have met SOOOO many friends on here, I advise also putting a craigslist ad out with your ht/weight/interests and asking just for friends. totally ridiculous. If the paradigm of this website is for singles to meet, then what good is it to come here while being in a relationship? I know, its because you meet friends, etc. But to the single person, it is rather offensive after awhile.
yell into your keyboards all you want, but it reads as rather boring and ego driven
to keep your profile on a dating website if your not dating. (not so much the forum, I get that some in relationships like to point out how brilliant/'dr phil' amazing they are.) Of course, I can say that it makes me bitter to constantly be on here and have those in relationships play the know-it-all role in the forum and in profiles. Well, heres' your pom poms and your cheerleader outfit for your favorite team, yourself.
Try cheering for those of us who are again trying to date rather than tootootin' your horn.
Is it possible for men/women to be friends without being intimate? Of course! But if we are meeting on a website that is streamlined for dating, doesn't that seem a bit FISHY?
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 5:03:57 PM | | I don't know about anyone else, but I find the forums rather addicting. My bf knows I read them and I tell him about posts on here, but he has no desire to read them himself. I have no desire to watch sci fi movies, so he can watch them and I can check out what's new in the forums. I think there are a lot of people who just like to read about the opinions of others. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 7:57:38 PM | Yeah, mayoroftempe, that's right, all the hooked up people are just here to make your life miserable and rub your nose in our happiness. Cuz it's all about you and your misery.
So Nyahhhh, Nyahhhh, Nyahhhh!
Or maybe we are just here to enjoy ourselves and it has nothing to do with you?
Naaaah! That is just not possible. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 8:00:35 PM | My boyfriend knows I get on here and if he wants to get on sites like this and chat on the forums that is fine because me and my guy have this thing called TRUST.
And once again the creator of this site gave the NOT SINGLE option.
My boyfriend and I met on this very site.
And those of us in relationships don't come here to rub it in peoples faces, alot of us met our significant other on this site and are wanting to show those who haven't met theirs yet not to give up hope because success can be found on here. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 8:09:40 PM | Yup, I'm here just for the forums. My profile is supposed to be hidden but I guess it's still visible going through the forums. But, about 1/3 of the people who have favorited me are women I've met through forums.
My boyfriend and I met on this very site.
And those of us in relationships don't come here to rub it in peoples faces, alot of us met our significant other on this site and are wanting to show those who haven't met theirs yet not to give up hope because success can be found on here.
ditto. We met because he saw my posts in the forums and then checked my profile.
I've only wanted one, and now have one. There are some people who know what they want and have enough integrity to stop searching (or even receiving) once they have what they want.
But then, there are some without integrity who will never understand that no matter what. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 8:51:51 PM | | i think is all bullshit, if you on here is because you are bored with who you are..if you are happy with your love one..all you will worry for is work and getting out to go home to your love one or whatever life you have..but if you here bored as me, you are single and seeking..cause if i am taken, i wouldn't be here and tons of people will agree.... | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 9:37:46 PM | If someone is honest enough to say they are dating or have a male/female friend doesn't mean they are being dishonest or looking to mess around.
Unless someone is a hermit, I see nothing wrong with wanting to make friends with new people.
And yes, sometimes with a busy life, being able to log on and read some of the serious forums is fun as well as enlightening. And with the economy and wanting to save money, various news stories have noted sites like POF have seen a big jump in membership. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/5/2009 11:19:58 PM | | I'm sensing a bit of scepticism here... yes, some people, myself included, are really only here for the forums, NOTHING ELSE. It doesn't matter if they're single or not, the main thing is they're here because they ENJOY posting and reading the forums. Hey who can blame them? I always learn something new whenever I come onto the forums, whether its in the Off Topic category, Dating advices, cooking, whatever. Most times its just for pure enjoyment. I don't know about you, but I keep getting the feeling that, you're only saying this because you've had a bad experience with someone who claimed to only be here for forums, but were in fact secretly dating... tell me I'm wrong. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/6/2009 9:39:39 AM | ''Yeah, mayoroftempe, that's right, all the hooked up people are just here to make your life miserable and rub your nose in our happiness. Cuz it's all about you and your misery.
So Nyahhhh, Nyahhhh, Nyahhhh!
Or maybe we are just here to enjoy ourselves and it has nothing to do with you?
Naaaah! That is just not possible.''
Well, I would think a website that has a focus on singles is MORE about someone like me, more about women who are searching for mates, than it is about you? And if your here to enjoy yourself and it has nothing to do with me, then who is the selfish one?
Nah that is just not possible.
I didn't make a direct personal attack at any one person, but my inquiry was not addressed. And if your insinuating that being single is 'misery' which I never voiced, then I DO think my point about those in relationships rubbing their 'success' and advice in the faces of single people can be evident in your post.
It has everything to do with me; it has everything to do with people on here who are serious about finding someone special. I am an individual and also a part of that group. A group you aren't a part of; but since YOU ARE in a relationship and most definitely your words are more substantial than a lowly, miserable person such as myself and anyone else who is single... Kudos to you.
I think I am gonna go to a BBW forum and post about how awesome it is to have a good body mass index. How amazing it is to go to the gym 4 times a week. And just talk talk talk about it for no reason except I WILL ENJOY MYSELF and that it has nothing to do with the people who are BBW and that they are miserable. Wouldn't that be insulting? Wouldn't that be incediary? Would you not at least consider that it would make no sense? Now, put it in context of those that are on here with relationships. I see it as very very similiar. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/6/2009 11:51:00 AM |
It has everything to do with me; it has everything to do with people on here who are serious about finding someone special.
I hate to break this to ya, my friend; but it's my considered opinion that your difficulty in finding what you seek is in no way caused by people who have been successful but choose to remain here at PoF for forums/friendship.
Cindy O | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/6/2009 1:49:48 PM | My great discovery is that the forums are one of the best parts of this sight.
I am not in a relationship.
But really being able to talk freely (virtually) is a wonderful thing and no wonder those in a relationship still like to be involved in the forums.
Anyway the more opinions from different perspectives the better!
Being honest on the profile about ones intentions is important! I guess when a profile is hidden nobody can contact you anyway. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/8/2009 10:20:18 AM | mayoroftempe--if you wish to socialize on a BBWforum have at it. I socialize here on this forum.
I really don't see how the people who are not looking are getting in your way. Are they blocking you from emailing the people you are interested in?
Can you not see how forums on relationships and dating might be valuable to people who are in relationships and dating as well as those who are looking? I frankly don't understand your resentment. Do you only want feedback from people who are looking for dates rather than those who have found them?
I don't see people rubbing anyone's nose in their alleged success. Well maybe a few. Most people only bring up their status in a post when it is relevant i.e as in a thread like this that asks the question are you really just here for the forums.
I think most respondents are not ego-driven. They are driven by our shared social nature as human beings. We used to sit around the fire and tell stories. Now we sit around our computers and swap advice. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/8/2009 3:07:29 PM | Hi Mayoroftempe, I'm with you actually.....Just coming to that stage of feeling a little irritated that nearly everybody is already hooked up with someone.
If I had a boyfriend I'd be telling him what I think about the topics that I contribute to on here. That is what I like in a relationship - being able to talk freely and often with someone I trust, along with other nice things.
But forums are great, only they are the default scenario.
Talking on here so as to find someone to connect with....someone with the same intellectual leanings , trying to find one to understand and be understood by.
The waters are muddied by those who admit, and those who don't come clean about being in a relationship already.... | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/8/2009 7:59:20 PM | We're now in relationship, thanks to pof, and we both STILL have our profiles on POF.
She's with me because she WANTS to be with me. And vice versa.
She trusts me, and I trust her.
But.....before she ever came on this site, I made the statement that, if the trust I held was called into question? I would sign on and let my woman peruse my dealings.
Unless I'm planning to surprise my woman with a gift or something positive...
I have nothing to hide from her. | |
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| You're in a relationship, but you have a profile on POF just for the threads? Really?
Posted: 3/10/2009 1:15:07 PM | 'it's my considered opinion that your difficulty in finding what you seek is in no way caused by people who have been successful but choose to remain here at PoF for forums/friendship. '
I am doing well, thank you very much. But assuming I am having difficulty in finding what I seek is tant amount to EXACTLY the sort of superiority complex I come across here when in regards to those in 'successful' relationships. Should I post how much I get laid and how many times I have rejected being in a relationship as of late? Does that make me have a more valid opinion? No, it comes across as rather egotistical and snotty. So, I am rather stating that I think those that come on here just to socialize via the internet and not date are using this website for inane reasons. Its like going to a new car dealership to just smell new car smells without even test driving. Its a waste of time for the dealership and for those shopping for a car. Thats my logic, regardless of how much animosity this internet social club shows me, I would just assume that if your in a healthy relationship that POF serves no further purpose except to get ego trips?
I don't care if people in relationships post here; I realize this forum exists in a vacuum seperate from the dating world. My main complaint is for people who have very explicit, very detailed profiles and are in relationships and NOT LOOKING. That just seems ridiculous. Do I need to know how tall and how much you weigh, and what you like to do on dates!? if you are already in a relationship? Explain that because I find it wierd.
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