| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/5/2009 12:09:55 AM |
I wonder if you'll try to ruin her reputation and chances of being a mother to her son just for your own needs.
Wow. Just... wow.
To the OP, here's to hoping the paternity test comes up a negative match. 
I imagine you will make a wonderful father with a much better woman. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/5/2009 1:37:15 AM | Try to contact her. Tell her that you know she's still pregnant and you want to take responsibility. If she refuses to let you, Take it to court! I'm sure the judge (I imagine Judge Judy only because of her rude attitude lol) would find your case a bit amusing.
Woman agrees with boyfriend to settle down and have a family. Woman finaly gets pregnant and decides to have an abortion without discussing with the father-to-be. Woman breaks up with boyfriend and moves back in with her folks. Woman decides not to go through with the abortion but regrets to inform said father-to-be.
I say take her to court!! At least you're a man who actually wants to take responsibility!! (unlike my child's father..)
I'm routing for ya! | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/5/2009 10:12:24 AM | | And you wonder why I wont touch a woman with a 40 foot pole. She ****ed you. She wanted to be a single mommy and mooch off of everybody. Her parents, the government, your paycheck, she will get money from them all to raise her child. She is a disgusting person. The person who will suffer most from this is her child who will be raides without a father, hecne never become a man. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/6/2009 11:32:39 PM | bosoxfaninwa - To reply to the "wow. Just...wow." it sounded very strange that over several months he NEVER once mentioned the mother having ANY problems beyond not telling him that she was still pregnant. Then, out of the blue when he realized he must now go to court, he brings out the "I didn't want to" line. It sounded strange to me, and yes it made me wonder if he would try to ruin her chance to be this child's mother, just for him to be able to see and hold him.
Most courts, despite there favoring of mothers, would look at drug abuse as a serious problem, plus since she is living with her parents the "things she said about her dad" could be very damaging to her chances of see the child she so carefully concealed from him.
Jen | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/8/2009 9:19:08 PM | OP...hope your ex did not use cocaine and alcohol (as you stated she uses) during her pregnancy and also she is not verbally abusive (like you stated she verbally threatened) to the baby.
Hopefully the baby will remain healthy (physically, emotionally and mentally). | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/9/2009 8:08:07 PM | | I would first get a paternity test done & contact youe ex & tell her that u want 2 be involved. If she ignores your request then I would get a lawyer. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/9/2009 10:43:52 PM | No Change = No Reply
Court date in a few weeks as previously stated. Trying the Mediation thing, however it seems to be at a standstill. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/9/2009 10:47:11 PM | | Have you had a chance to ask your ex what the heck happened back in the beginning of this mess? Why was she suddenly looking to abort a PLANNED pregnancy, why did she leave, etc.? | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/9/2009 10:55:16 PM | Futureshock,
Still in the Mediation Stage of things. We do not talk directly, as the Mediator acts as a Middle Man (well woman), which was also recommended by the Lawyer.
Right now any of that is the last thing on my mind. This is about our son and him alone. All the other stuff is in the past, and I don’t care for bothering myself with any of it.
My son is now my only concern and the relationship between him and me.
Hope that makes sense to you all. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/9/2009 10:57:09 PM | Hope that makes sense to you all.
You're right, and it does make sense. I wish you all the best, and I hope it all works out. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/10/2009 11:28:42 AM | | OP...you keep on saying "your" son...lets hope that is the result of the paternity test, as it seems you really want to be the father of this baby. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/13/2009 7:37:19 PM | I Attended an Intake Meeting with a supervised visit provider today.
Filled out all the necessary forms, just waiting on the ex to do the same.
If all goes well, I am hoping that I get to meet/see my son on my Birthday.
The next few days are going to be very long. I hope that I will be able to sleep! | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/13/2009 7:46:04 PM | alwaysyummy,
Seeing as you do not have or want kids, I don't expect you to understand my optimism with these circumstances.
My gut feeling tells me that there is no shadow of a doubt that he is my son.
As I have previously stated, I am willing to accept whatever the outcome is, and will hope for the best but also plan for the worse.
It feels like one of those things that is just hard to explain. I am sure that others know what I mean. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/13/2009 10:27:16 PM | OP...you misunderstand my comments completely.
I just do not want you to be disappointed if the baby is not yours.
It is very easy to say you are preparing for the worse (that the baby is not yours), but in your inner heart you really want to be the father of this baby.
I wish you all the best and if the paternity test does prove you are the father, then you are truly blessed and will be a good father.
This baby will be blessed and lucky to have you as the father. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/14/2009 1:54:19 PM | I would get a paternity test done just in case. I know that you said you are sure that she would not have cheated on you because you have known her for 12 years. However, I bet you never thought she would become prego with your child and then lie to you about keeping the baby. You should go through the legal system to get custody or shared custody of your child because it seems clear that she has already made up her mind that you will not be a factor in the childs life.
Another reason she may have done this is that she wanted a child and decided that she wanted you as a sperm donor but not in her and the childs life. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/14/2009 10:59:08 PM | If you are HAPPY and you know it, clap your hands "CLAP CLAP".
If you are HAPPY and you know it, clap your hands "CLAP CLAP".
If you are HAPPY and you know it and you really wanna SHOW IT!
If you are HAPPY and you know it, clap your hands "CLAP CLAP".
I Get to meet/see him this friday afternoon, for two hours, just him and I (and a supervisor).
If you are HAPPY and you know it, clap your hands "CLAP CLAP". | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/14/2009 11:05:22 PM | OP...congrats on being the father of your son...very happy for you...enjoy your son...you are going to be a great father.
what a great gift for your birthday.
"Happy birthday". | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/15/2009 7:00:31 AM | Why have you not got the paternity test? Just curious. You are wrapping yourself all up in this without knowing. Going on your "gut feeling" is a little risky.
I KNEW that my daughters bio dad was her dad but still insisted on a paternity test...just in case. And maybe I was hoping that someone elses sperm had somehow jumped over onto me and impregnated me. lol | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/15/2009 7:07:25 AM |
I imagine you will make a wonderful father and a much better woman.
I fixed this quote. Seriously, in the nicest way possible, you have some deep seeded emotional issues. If you act this much like a women in real life, it is no wonder she left you. Just be happy she wanted to your kid at all, I would have elected to go to the sperm bank, or find some random attractive guy who possesses all of the features needed in a man. I really hope you elect to go to counseling for yourself, because otherwise you will be nothing but destructive to this child. And finally, I have serious questions and concerns as to why you seek validation for all of this from strangers on an online dating website. Perhaps mommy didnt hold you enough as a child, and daddy wasnt there? I do not know, but get help... seriously. | |
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| PLANNED PREGNANCY GONE........????
Posted: 7/16/2009 9:07:58 PM | First tell her you know, and you want your share of time with the child. Tell her you want to be civil and adults about it and go into a lawyers office to draw up a custody agreement TOGETHER that you can both agree on, with the lawyer. Everything from child support, days a week and holidays; down to the exact times of pick up and drop offs, and who does which, and even who claims him on the odd years and even on tax returns. Make it as tight as possible. Also in these papers I would have added you want a DNA testing, and if it comes back not your child, the order is void. I say this because I wonder if she cheated and the reason she told you she was aborting and split was because the child may not be yours. You never know, so be sure.
It doesn't cost a whole lot to do this...$200 dollars if it unless you spend 5 hours in the lawyers office debating.
Discuss whether or not you can pick her up to take her to the hospital and be there for delivery, etc.
If she refuses, tell her you have no choice but to take legal action, and then do so. | |
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