| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/5/2005 10:37:33 PM | Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/8/2005 9:07:16 AM | | Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up! | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/8/2005 10:07:42 AM | | a day without sunshine is like night | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/8/2005 12:14:52 PM | | IS THAT SUPOSED TO BE FUNNY ? CONFUSED | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/8/2005 12:43:43 PM | Hey, did somebody step on a duck?
Did you get a free bowl of soup with that shirt? Looks good on you, though....
Long live Rodney | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/8/2005 4:37:48 PM | your village called,they miss their idiot | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/8/2005 4:40:08 PM | if you don't swallow the solution you're part of the problem | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/9/2005 12:58:57 AM | Even crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.
My ex-con friend recently explained to me why he refuses to ever get married. He says "the wedding rings look too much like minature handcuffs....." | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/9/2005 12:08:21 PM | I don't get no respect.........I fell asleep the other night with a cigarette in my hand...........My wife lit it!!
The late great, Rodney Dangerfield | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/9/2005 3:13:29 PM | Used this one on a friend at the bar.. lol
Hey baby you are a ten! (Her: aww thanks)
Yes, it would take at least ten drinks before I thought about taking you home | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/9/2005 5:05:07 PM | | Confuscious says "Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement." | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/9/2005 5:49:00 PM | **** it
fat people are like mopeds it's only cool untill your friends see u riding one...
are u picking up what i'm thowing down,
are u throwing down what i'm picking up | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 2:19:18 AM | can i get you a drink or should i go f***k myself again??
be original and say yes, everyone else says no
of all the things i've lost, i miss my sanity the most
if u spin an oriental man, does he become disoriented?
can an orphan eat at a family restaurant?
Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
dont piss me off, im running out of places to hide the bodies
guns dont kill people, death kills people, its a proven medical fact
gun control is hitting your target
I don't know what your problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce.
I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
Those of you who think you know everything are very annoying to those of us who do.
a friend in need is a bloddy nuisance (the great benny hill)
do unto others.... and then run (also bh)
may the bluebird of happiness fly up your nose
if you dont have anything nice to say, come sit next to me | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 11:02:32 AM | Saw these on a shirt:
How can I miss you if you won't go away?
Every girl loves a dirty cowboy.
It's hard being perfect, but somebody has to do it.
(On a rodeo shirt) 2000 pounds of animated hamburger. | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 12:19:37 PM | | what's our oil doing under their soil? | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 1:57:24 PM | | if sex is a pain in the a$$, you're doing it wrong | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 2:35:33 PM | not a one liner but anywho........."What did the  say to the vibrator? What the hell you shaking for?.......I'm the one their gonna eat!!!  | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 2:39:28 PM | "I survived the Jonestown massacre"
Or how about.........F_CK...........the only thing missing is YOU!
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 2:42:36 PM | OOPS........F_CK Y_ _ ..........the only thing missing is YOU.........
Think I'll have another drink.............hehe | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 2:47:28 PM | | what does every elmo doll get before leaving the factory, 2 test tickles | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/10/2005 9:56:09 PM | | grow your own dope - plant a man | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/11/2005 1:40:40 AM | | i have the body of a god... too bad its buddha | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/11/2005 2:49:05 AM | the diffence between pms and a pitbull? lipstick
every man needs something to believe in i believe i will have another beer
what do you say to a one legged hitch hiker? hop in
sex is a misdemenor the more i miss it the meaner i get | |
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| Fun One Liners
Posted: 7/11/2005 3:21:08 AM | | if u love me you'll drop the charges | |
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