| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 4:03:15 PM | | Korky the Counsellor - Humungo surpasses us all in his ability to write amazing posts which sadly, few people seem to pick up on - such is the joy of being really, really smart on a site like POF. Humungo, reddit may be more up your alley (and you may already be on it). Personally, reddit kind of drives me a bit crazy - far too many, delusional 24-year-old basement boys ... but geeez, lots of brilliant repartee. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 4:42:25 PM | It isn't a gender issue. There are plenty of women out there that toy with men. Men just don't broadcast their boo hoo's as much about it. They figure it out, deal, and move on.
Look at it like this... You have men, actions, and women. Both genders are entirely capable of any action given the situation.
Your situation? He just ain't into you honey. A man should be sure of himself and what he wants. He shouldn't have to kiss your ass. At the very least he should let you know his level of interest by his actions. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 4:57:44 PM | I think they do that in case the beauty queens don't want anything to do with them. I know one who has been undecided for 3 yrs said he will decide his destiny. If I met someone in the meantime, he would "step in".
Sorry, but we are not getting any younger. If I met someone I would not let Mr. Undecided decide to "step in". I don't want to be 60 and decide I'm not good enough after all.
I say just keep moving forward. Apparently, he does not know what he wants. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 7:23:13 PM |
Gonna sound like Katie Perry here but: Why do men run hot then cold and are yes then no? Been kinda seeing someone but it seems he rushes forward then holds back only to move forward at a later time. I never know if I am coming or going.
If I had the answer to this, I wouldn't be here! But if you figure it out, please let me know! | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 7:53:22 PM | I dunno...In my experience, this happened (beside the obvious "I let him") because he wanted to keep his options open...A woman would cross his path and the grass would suddenly become greener on her side...I mean, really, why would he commit to me if he thought he had a chance with this other woman who, seemingly, had more to offer? Of course, more often than not, the alternative is not better and they return to the "tried and true" - UNTIL, sigh, their next "interest" comes along...
Now? My attitude is "This is Me...Take it Leave it"...And I tell you what, if they choose to leave it, as far as I am concerned? It is permanent... | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 9:17:47 PM | | Why are you hanging on a string? If he does not fit what you are looking for, move on, what good does it do to analyze his actions and why keep letting him treat you that way. It's simple, you don't like his behavior, stop seeing him. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/22/2009 9:27:24 PM | cause women allow it....kinda simple really.......the question is why?
humongo....loved the analogy......wonder if she might figure it out....
hint: Check your level of self-esteem OP....you might just realize it matters not what people do but why you put up with it in the first place. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 1:24:07 AM |
hold up Arabianangel, many others were in the OP position too, and most of them who figured it out finally admitted OOPS, I pooched screwed by ignoring the warning signs or Red Flags to others.
If im in the beginning stages of a relationship and a woman is telling me after a month she loves me blah blah blah, warning signs are going off in my head, " danger will robinson danger" im having a talk with this woman to see where is her head, Ive found that people who claim they love that quickly falls out of love just as fast, you want some proof look at some of the threads.
Eg; This person moved in after 3 months of dating, they were hot and heavy and one day the partner got up and left broke up with them by text, note on a pigeon, email, snail mail from another country blah blah blah. we hear stories like that all the time.
My point is too many people ignore the warning signs because they think 1) it cant happen to them 2) it only happens to stupid people 3) there emotions in most cases are acting without the benefit of intellect.
Point taken …. (lost in space was my favorite) :)
When I`ve done this what I`m thinking is you just fill me up so easily. I`ve had my fill of love and affection for now.
But when it runs out I`ll be back for more.
Hint: dont fill me up too fast.
So is it a never ending process?... at what point are their appetites fulfilled? | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 2:33:28 AM | I think because it's a known fact that men are way too proud.
Like resusing to ask for directions. So it's not that hard to understand.
He's probably not doing it on purpose; In reality, he doesn't know if he's
coming or going either, and certainly not going to ask anyone . | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 4:25:41 AM |
He was the one who has said I love three times....then states that maybe we should slow it down...? I never said those words
OP, let's go through this.....
Him "I love you"
No love responce from you?
You "Oh yeah, that is great. I like being around you."
Him (thinking) Oh sh!t, what an idiot I am!!!!!!! So he says"uhhh, hmmmmm, yeah, we are moving too fast.......what was I thinking?"
He needs a way to backpeddle when he puts his feelings out there and you do not recipricate. Some people call that "needy" but to me, you have told him THREE TIMES that this is not what he wants it to be........and then you complain because he backs off????????
I would rather be alone than fall in love alone (again) and apparently, he feels the same way. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 4:38:21 AM | [qoute]unfortunately OP.....you asked the wrong question. the question you need to be asking is why do women allow men to keep them on a string?
We really do teach people how to treat us. If YOU hang on that string it is Your responsibility... your choice to hang or 'let go'.
If I dont like the way someone treats me - I have choices. I can let them continue, ask them to stop and if they do .. done deal, if they don't - it is up to me to move my own as$ and hang or hit the road. I would hit the road.
Also agree with the poster who said it isn't a gender issue. It isn't ONLY men who keep women on a string.. there are lots of people who aren't finished with the relationship they're in who expect 'him' to hang on that string too.
People do what they do because they can. **Not all people will do what they 'can' .. Some of us are pretty frikkin decent.
One thing I do like about Most men - they really do Like 'most' of us women .. and vice versa. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 5:18:26 AM | I, too, think he did feel he rushed it by saying he loved you and you didn't respond, so he backed way off. That's understandable.
If a guy backs off from me, I'm going to let him. I refuse to run around on a string.
It's not them that attach the strings, it's you. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 11:19:46 AM | | I used to be a player, so I would say he probably has another woman or two on the line. He is playing all of you. If he was really interested, you would be getting more attention. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 11:24:43 AM |
uhm duh. Cuz women let them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good freaking Gawd. I bet you have had to replace your computer more than once from trying to shake some sense into it.
It's not about women letting men do it, but asking men to do it.
"Here is my string, please hold the end of it." | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 11:29:43 AM | | So we don't lose track of you or run away lol....Ok for the most part its who you are going out with when you date someone online on what you are attractive too you never ever going find the right person you need to be with. Love yourself before you can venture out and be in a relationship.... | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 12:14:33 PM | If I am fortunate enough to find a suitable lady I will likely keep her on a string, but only at night. That is because my night vision, at my age, is going. Not much else seems to be going yet so I'll need her on the end of a string so I can find her in the dark.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm
I doubt if she will mind at least not until the sunrise after which I don't need the string anyways.  | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 12:53:46 PM |
Why do men run hot then cold and are yes then no?
I tell you if tell me:
Why do women allow themselves to be kept on a string?
Btw, op, running hot and cold is not exactly "being kept on a string".
Also , it might very well be that the guy has insecurities/worries/problems, but it might also have something to do with you - or it might be both. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/23/2009 1:15:21 PM | I don't think it has anything to do with some guy doing awful things to the OP.
It's all in her poor widdle confused mind: he loves me, loves me not, loves me, loves me not, lather, rinse, repeat... | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/31/2009 12:52:07 AM | | Honey, get use to it.Men normally get cold feet.Think about it, does a stallion buck first time you put a sattle on his back then as time goes on he gets use to it. same dang thing.Men eventually likes dogs hang there head and wimper to you.Not saying that men are bad there just not ready to be strapped down to kids, a car, wife, and a house, and all the stuff that goes with it.Patience is the key.Men get controlled by women alot of times and they don't want the yes dear so soon. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/31/2009 4:54:50 AM | Why are you letting some guy jerk you around sister?
Remember...a man will only do to you what you LET him do. This ain't about him--it's about you not having the girly balls to walk away and let him dangle someone else. And you're 39??? You should know better.
No relationship is worth losing one's self-respsect. Male or female.
If you like being a yo-yo, then I'm happy for you. The rest of us will take our strings and keep them to ourselves. | |
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| Why do men keep women on a string
Posted: 3/31/2009 5:01:23 AM |
Gonna sound like Katie Perry here but: Why do men run hot then cold and are yes then no? Been kinda seeing someone but it seems he rushes forward then holds back only to move forward at a later time. I never know if I am coming or going.
It depends on the situation, but there could be a lot of reasons.
A) He may not be into you
B) He may not be sure of his feelings towards you
C) He may not be sure of your feelings towards him
D) He may be waiting on you to making the next move, or at least give some indication of how you feel towards him.
I know personally I have to have some indication of where I stand after I have initially asked a girl out, it makes it easier as I dont want to waste my time or theirs. I know I am worth more than that, I dont mind doing the chasing but I would rather chase a girl who wants to be chased its more fun when you catch her  | |
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