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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/9/2009 6:51:07 PM | | tell him you had a great time and everything you just dont see it working out for a relationship maybe a friendship but thats it. good luck | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/9/2009 7:23:31 PM | I find a lot of women who say they don't want to reject a guy because they don't want to hurt *his* feelings are really only concerned about their own. They don't want to reject him because they are afraid of conflict. If they really cared about the guy's feelings, they'd let him know quickly and unambiguously that they are not interested in dating anymore.
The women who have had the intestinal fortitude to let me down quickly are the ones I have respected the most, and occasionally been able to remain friends with. | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/10/2009 1:59:08 PM | why don't you just come out and say it; say that you dont feel you are a good fit and that the spark isn't there for you in regards to him.
EMAIL; omg; the internet age is making people absolutely clueless on how to communicate; you act like an adult and talk to him and let him know the truth but do it with sensitivity; tell him how you would like to be told. | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/10/2009 2:36:06 PM | | I would suggest replying to his email, thanking him for the date and stating that you didn't feel you had any chemistry. Wish him the best. It's better than leaving him wondering. His feelings might be hurt, but it beats him waiting around to see if you're going to email him back. | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/10/2009 3:49:29 PM | As hard as it is to look someone in the eyes and tell them "Sorry, but I'm not feeling the spark...", it is one of the most liberating feelings in the world when you say it.
Last fall, I met a guy for coffee as we seemed to have some things in common. Physically he was not my type but I thought, "You never know" and I was not about to write him off because I didn't find him physically attractive. His emails were well written, extremely witty and oozed intelligence.
However, when we met, I felt nothing at all. I stayed for about 30 minutes and knew without a doubt that there would be no more dates. He was chomping at the bit to ask me out again and instead of saying "Sure......" like I had done in the past, I took a deep breath and telling myself this guy needed to hear how I felt, said, "No, I'm sorry but I am not feeling any chemistry." He seemed a bit taken aback by this but I told him the truth and I felt good that I ended it immediately. There were no dodging his calls or emails the following week and both of us were free to move forward instead of being left hanging or second guessing actions.
If someone DOES get pissy when you tell them "no", you have all the proof you need for not accepting a second date. | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/11/2009 3:23:25 PM | | would you see him again if it were just as friends? if so, let him know it would be a "friends only" date and see if he is interested in that. Usually the guys aren't but ya never know... | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/11/2009 3:34:12 PM | Just tell him that you are interested in only a one night stand, and since you would be on a second date........sorry......to late........
OT.........Why not just let the man know that you think he is a fine gentleman, but there are no sparks there to want more than being friends, and if he can not understand that, why worry?
Just my opinion........   | |
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| you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/20/2009 4:48:02 AM | Its a shame that you cant give the guy another chance. First dates are always so difficult at times, both are trying sometimes too hard to impress the other and doesnt always come across as the person they really are.
To be honest, i didnt find my 2nd husband attractive when i went on my first date with him. He was lovely but he didnt make my heart go boom. But the more i saw him and got to know him, the more and more i found attracting me to him. Ok we ended up in divorce after 6 years of marriage but that had nothing to do with how we met ( online ).
Some people are just 'slow burners'....but boy, when they ignite it could be the best thing ever to happen!!
I'm dippin my toes in the waters just now and as long as any potential dates arent axe murderers,ask me to do anything kinky within minutes of meeting them, or are just basically weird, i'll give them a chance, even if the first date doesnt produce heart stopping fireworks and butterflies doin loop da loop in my tum! lol | |
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