| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 6/27/2009 9:08:13 PM | | Rarely, I am nervous on the 1st date. Guys ask me if I am nervous and I say no. I had lots of guys in the past who were nervous on the 1st date. I start talking about professional sporting events I attened when I lived in washington, D.C. or cars or somethning masuline. Then they are almed down. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 6/27/2009 9:10:31 PM | I try not to judge if someone is nerovius or not, maybe they have not done much internet dating or they just started dating again. Maybe, it is scary to meet a stranager.
I try to look at people as indivials. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 6/27/2009 9:21:40 PM | I used to think it was sweet and charming but then I realized if they are nervous they often wind up wanting to get one up on you later for it and now it puts me off. It's a sign they know you are a bit much for them and they want to even the score which usually means bringing you down rather than lifting them up - no matter how much you try to. I would avoid it because it's a sign of low self esteem and people who feel in the one down position can be a handful and often very high drama. I'm not saying that's always the case but as a woman I found it was. Maybe if it's the other way around it's different. Don't know. I just know men generally have mixed feelings or outright don't like women they look up to over the long term. Sure they want to bag you but that's just a power trip and is that really what you want anyway? Anyway, I just don't think it' good to be with someone who is uncomfortable around you. If I really liked them I'd give it a while to see if the discomfort went away, like a few dates at most and some compliments but if it did not completely disappear or the person did not take responsibility for how they feel or started to project their feelings of discomfort onto me as if I'm responsible for their self perception I'd be so gone.
It really is all about them not you. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:05:54 AM | Depends.
If it's short-term nervousness..then "No."
If it's throughout the whole date...then I guess you'd have to determine whether or not it was worth your time to continue.
I usually give most women a "2nd chance" because I don't believe in the whole "chemistry" thing myself.
Sometimes you catch people on bad days.... | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:17:00 AM | | Fear of acceptance is the biggest fear in our species so yep .. until you feel accepted and the energy is one between the eyes of acceptance then you will be nervous .. sinking into someone is an intergrated process brought on by actions and that is what takes nervous to courageous and courage is love. Anyone who is vulnerable and authentic will be receptive to the energy field of love anyone else will miss the boat.. it must be that way or you block out what you need to see. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:26:39 AM | | I think when a person is nervous its a good thing...for me it shows they feel the same way i do. When a guy is soo confident..they come in an put their arms on the couch, that makes me want to run out of my own place!! When im really into someone I am nervous, and you can tell...I will hardly make eye contact, its weird but I would think a guy mite find this as a compliment...I mite be wrong thou lol | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:39:18 AM | | It's not a turnoff for me, instead I would consider it a compliment. It usually means they like you. Nervousness is only temporary anyway. Then people settle in and start acting like themselves, more quickly if you help them along. And I don't think it's always a sign of insecurity, it could also be an indication of humility, or down-to-earth-ness if you will. Hard to find these days, especially in people who are very attractive. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/6/2009 9:43:40 PM | depends on how nervous.
if your nervous to the point where u act very very stupid then ya it can be a turn off i guess.
depends on the person your on the date with.if on a date with a girl who thinks shes all that and dates a lot she will be turned off by it maybe. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/6/2009 9:52:08 PM | I'm as shy as shit on a first date. I don't know the other person and why, oh why....do men seem to think eating out is the best first date?????
So you sit there opposite each other so you can see each other face to face and then commence to chew and talk>>>>>never ceases to amaze me.
Why not just invite me to visit you in the bathroom so I can observe your toilet habits?
If you eat spaghetti, you can't help but slop sauce all over the place or on the table cloth....
If you eat pizza and you are so intimidated by it that you cut it like a Tbone steak, you really have problems.....if you pick it up, tilt your head back, open your mouth wide and take a humongous bite, you are a Creton.
Salad......dripping dressing, bouncing tomatoes, onions....
Cutting up steak, if you hold your fork upside down and cut with the knife then use the upside down fork to present it to your mouth.....you're a Creton.
If you simply pick up the Tbone and commence to tear it off the bone....you're from Florida.
No eating out on the first date and yeah, I'm shy....but a couple glasses of wine and I'll be entertaining you from the bartop at Karaoke....and you'll have to be standing tall to catch my bra. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 7/6/2009 9:53:13 PM | I've always been nervous on a first date. I just can't help myself.
I'm either jittery or I'll unknowingly ask a question I already asked 3 minutes ago.
You shouldn't turn someone down because of how nervous they are on a first date though. If the nervousness continues over time.. give or take a week or so, then I might start to worry. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:44:31 PM | | Don't be too hard on those that are a little nervous. I'm one of them. I work myself into a minor tizzy prior to the first meeting. If I stay a little nervous that means I'm interested. If the nerves are gone immediately, there is no chemistry and there won't be a second meeting. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:52:41 PM | I'd actually prefer dating a woman who seemed a little nervous on the first date.
If a woman, who I were meeting, didn't seem at least a little nervous, I may just assume that she's some sort of serial dater who's too used to meeting strange men on a regular basis. Which would be a bit of a turn-of to me. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/7/2009 12:49:42 AM | If both peopl are intersted in each other, then there is a little excitment anyway prior to a first meeting
If both people are caring, then they'll make each other comfortable anyway
so simple
~sc~ | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/7/2009 8:20:45 AM | | Yeah, I can completely understand being nervous on a first date. That's how I am. Plus, I'm shy at first anyway. But within a short period of time, I calm down, relax and can have a great conversation. But if she is still nervous, I do my best to make her feel at ease. I've been told that I'm good at doing that. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/10/2009 5:23:50 AM | | Well there is a line between being nervous and not having confidence. It is normal to feel a little gittery at the first date, but if a guy (or girl) is so nervous that he starts to act stupid, or embarrassing, then that is a big lack of confidence. Usually if I get a bit nervous, it goes away after a few minutes.... as it might just be first minute jitters.... but to be overly nervous or nervous all night is really a big turn off for me. It give me the feeling I'm dating a real dudd and dummy. You can be nervous on the inside, but dont let it show so much on the outside. I met a guy and he was literally shaking. He brought the drinks to our table, and he was shaking. He started to stutter. He was making no conversation at all, just vague words. The worse part was, the whole time I was with him, which was about 2 hours, he continued to shake. He never got his composure, and then he told me that he was not used to meeting women. Oh really??? Duh??? I wonder how i could tell. Well, I definitely did not want to see him again because it put me off so much. I mean I want to date a man.... not a mouse. So being a bit nervous is ok, as long as your natural relaxed self takes over.... but if its more than just the jitters, it's lack of confidence and insecurity and both of those in either man or woman is a real turn off for me. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/10/2009 5:47:01 AM | I WISH I actually still got nervous on first dates... I've done so many of them that I'm afraid I've become totally indifferent to the experience and partially sleepwalk through it out of reservations that there won't be a second one (statistically-speaking from past experiences with online dating). 
At least if I got a little nervous it might be a pleasant indication that I was actually somewhat invested in the outing if I'm that worried about it turning out well...  | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/10/2009 6:35:17 AM | i kind of like it when a woman is nervous at first and then lets her true personality shine forth.
i'm rarely nervous on first dates or any date.
as a man who has been single almost all my life i believe i've been out with over 500 women so it's no big deal anymore. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/10/2009 8:03:47 PM | Sorry in advance if this post sounds too judgmental
i believe i've been out with over 500 women so it's no big deal anymore. This is exactly the reason why I'd personally prefer someone who I was dating to be a little nervous.
I'm sorry but, to me, someone who's dated over 500 people is a turn-off. | |
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/10/2009 9:09:11 PM | Anytime you're excessively nervous and needy, you will scare the other person off.
I've learned that lesson concretly as this decade draws to a close.
she should put u in concrete overshus b4 the decade closes, the rest is merciful for all concerned, blub blub blub
help..the gene pool is in dire jeopardy...
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| Is being nervous on a 1st date really a turn off?
Posted: 11/12/2009 6:27:37 AM |
I'm sorry but, to me, someone who's dated over 500 people is a turn-off.
i'm not for everyone. but i've been a bachelor for about 45 of my 57 years. what do you want me to do? sit at home and watch tv? | |
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