| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 1:13:32 PM | LOL...too funny
I think whoever started this thread is on to something. Not a lot of us black women date white men. But then we dont date a lot of asians either but i guess the topic is black and white so I'd better stay on task ..
I personally have no problem DATING a white, asian, latino, or GREEN man (ok maybe not green)....however as a black woman i find some of the attributes on a black man more attractive than others....and assuming im normal...that is probably what other black women experience. And I know for a fact some white men feel the same, i think one poster mentioned that black women tend to be larger in frame than white women and so hes not really attracted to that....someone else talked about the coarsness of black hair and how he didnt like that....I say date who you feel comfortable with spending your time with and if they happen to be of another race so what thats your business....it shouldnt be as taboo as it used to be to see mixed race couples... | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 2:25:01 PM | | u have a point leggs but of all races of women and this is a fact black women have the lowest percentage of interracial marriage and dating so lets say that what u say is true that everyone generally prefers to date those with similiar physical features then how does that explain why white asian latino women have higher numbers of dating black men than do black women of dating men of other races it says to me that black women prefer to be prejudice and racist and just plain ignorant when it comes to other cultures of people like i said before to all my non black brothers who date black women if u want a good black woman get one from africa not america | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 4:10:38 PM | I think most I said most white men just want to use black women for experiemental purposes and once the thrill is gone they go back to white women because its easier for them to been in public with someone who looks like them. If a white man cant hold my hand kiss me and touch in public but want to do it in private he can go to hell.
Also I believe that most white men dont want to have deal with telling their friends famlies coworkers they are dating a black woman. I had one bad expereince with a white guy and when I finally realized his motives I kicked him to the curb. I dont take this one experience and say that all white men are like this but it has taught me to be more aware of thier motives.
I feel that black women need to be careful and make sure the guy is really sincere about wanting to date you and not just liviing out a fantasy. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 6:31:05 PM | SexyK
I agree with you again 200% I am 31 never married no kids went to college I go to work and I dont have any drama. I try to take care of my body.I go to work go to the gym and come home. I live alone I have car and I dont need anyone to pay my bills. Ive been on my own since I was 16.
With all that most will never see me or any black woman for that matter as nothing but a ghetto uneducated babymaking welfare recipent. Its a stereotype black women have to fight everyday and we know its true look at the comments. I dont know if you seen that epsidoe of Tyra Banks when she had women of different races on her show and one of the questions she asked the men out of about 20 guys of different races how many would take a certain woman of a certain race home. Need less to say white women had the most followed by Asian and hispanic and black women the least. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 6:45:28 PM | So a black woman is only beautiful if her skin is light or if she is interracial? Well if that floats your boat do you! BUT!!!!!!!
I teach first grade and I listen to the dark skin black girls talk about how much they hate their dark skin and they wish they were lighter because people will like them more. Kids are telling each other stay away from the "dark skin" one some of her black might rub off on you. Thank GOD I have dark skin because I can be an advocate for these kids and tell the to love their dark skin. I tell them all the time because they alway tell me I am pretty for a teacher lol. I tell them if I am pretty and I have dark skin why dont you think you are pretty.
Its so sad to see these kids already feel defeated because they think their dark skin is a curse.
I love my dark skin and I will love it even more when I am in my 50's and still wrinkle free. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 6:52:39 PM | | That isn't what I said don't get it twisted. Like, I find you very attractive. But, generally, for me if I'm going to date a black woman she has a lighter complexion. Skin color is only part of the equation. Personality is another part of the equation. Don't forget shared interests. When I choose to date a woman black, white, hispanic, asian, mixed... I look at the total person. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 7:00:51 PM | I often thought about this too, Jaila. In Toronto I was trying to date some black women, and they all turned me down. They said I looked like a tub of lard. They did not say it in unison, like a barber-shop quartette, but they each did. They were not rude, still, the meaning was the same.
I think in northern North America the racial discrimination is there, very strongly; and now both ways. We don't get racial discrimination with the Chinese, but they don't date white men, either. If you take me, as an example, white women don't date white men, either.
We, white men, have become pointless. Sorta. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 7:06:13 PM | You have every right to be attracted to a certain kind of woman. I responded because I am a dark skinned black woman and it stings just a tad everytime I get counted out because I am dark skinned. I am considered lower in status no class and worthless. I wouldnt have a chance in hell if I was put next to a woman with lighter skin she in most cases would be considered the "beautiful"
I know because I live it everyday and it is what it is. Im not angry or anything like that I smile everyday even though I cant find a good man lol   | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 7:20:25 PM | Hey Rebound City, are you sure you live here in Toronto?
I think then you may have experienced some of the few black girls who are not so nice. But honestly? I have found many black women to be alot more outgoing, fun, and are overall great.
Also again, what part of Toronto are you in and around? I see many Asian men dating white women here. I will admit that yes you do see alot of Asian women dating white men and black men, but I also think because it is becoming more of a popular topic, it is in the back of our minds and so we will notice it more. Sort of like when we would see alot of white women dating black men in the late 80's.
Toronto has got to be the most diverse city in North America and I have found that all races and cultures do date outside thier "race" here.
And Jojonla, here I have found that it doesn't matter if you are a light skin girl or a dark skin black girl, you will be viewed as sexy and not put into classes. There are lots of sucessful, beautiful black women like yourself.
Black women, Indian women etc, they are all more popular here than your average white woman. I think white men love curves, exotic features, smiles etc. What black women have naturally. Just one's views based on experiences and observing others.
Also still surprisingly, white men think black women do not date white men. So far from the truth I tell ya. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 7:22:44 PM | You know, I often think about why god made people different colors. It is an immediate identifier for those who make their responses different by racial ranking.
I don't believe in god any more. I believe in Darwinist evolution, and I accept that dark skin is better in hot, sunny climates to fight cancer-causing effects of the environment. That's all there is to it, and we, humans, turned it into a tragedy for 1/3 of the US population. Or 1/5th, whatever. Any number is too high for this.
The dilemma of black-white in the USA is the most complex human sociological dilemma, and it is not only really far from being solved, but it is getting farther and farther away from any sort of satisfactory solution.
This is fine, but not for those who directly and unjustly suffer because of the effects of this "sociological dilemma". | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 7:32:34 PM | Yes, I live in Toronto. I see hardly any interracial couples on the street, though there is a small number of them, granted.
I don't know why this is so. I don't think it's because, categorically, white men don't want to date black women or vice versa. I don't know what the cause of it is, really, and I definitely had more than my share of liking or admiring black women, and vice versa.
I also like and admire Chinese women and vice versa, and I admire white women, who scream "get away from me, creep!" when I'm closer than a city block to them on the sidewalk. The management of Loblaw's has asked me to notify the manager of their store nearest to me to clear it from people when I want to go shopping, as a gesture of my allowing self-preservation for the race (as in 'species').
In fact, the weather satellites only take pics of my area on overcast days, so I won't break their expensive space satellites and the photographic equipment on them. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 7:40:47 PM | rebound City, you must not be getting out and about in the city...or as my American friends like to say to me..aboot..but man interracial dating here in Toronto is the norm. I see interrcial couples all over. Take a walk down Yonge Street..when the weather gets nicer..and get some take out, grab a chair at a table at Dundas Square and people watch. Or grab a friend, go to Milestones on the 4th floor of Toronto Life Centre at Dundas & Yonge across from Dundas Square, sit on the patio and people watch. You will see tons of interracial couples. Try to sit in a section of a restaurant where there is a non-white girl serving. Strike up some fun conversation with her. Ask her what her ethnic background is. I bet she will be genuine and great to talk to.
I know of many black women who prefer to date white men. Who date all kinds of men as well. Black women are some of the easiest women to talk to.
Here is something I would like you to do. Nxt time you see a black woman that catches your eye, have a friendly smile when you look at her, even say "Hi" as you are about to pass by. She'll smile and say "Hi" back I bet.
But do not have a glaring stare at her. No woman likes this. Smile nicely and they know you are flirting with her. Have confidence though, because no woman likes a man with no confidence. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 8:30:46 PM | Sigh
I was kinda sorta hoping this would die but I see that it hasn't.
Here's my 2 cents for what it's worth.
I date MEN. Black, white, Israeli, Turkish, Jewish...the commonality is men. That being said, there are many times when I **attract** every color of the rainbow BUT black, regardless of what I am doing or saying or even where I'm at. Men who have no problems dating black women (not trying to hook up but dating) do so and don't toot their horns about it. Black women like myself who date whomever they're attracted to don't holler and scream about it either. When I dated a white guy over 20 yrs ago, HIS family and friends had a hissy fit. My friends and family didn't care--but that's because I've always surrounded myself by people of every color of the rainbow. I was raised to believe that people are people and ignorance doesn't have a color. There are assh**es in every shade...witness some of the crap being said here.
Jaila...obviously there are answers here that disprove your question--there ARE BWWM coupling in the dating world...but yes it's just not as common as BMWW. That's just how life is. It's not right, it's not wrong. You may just happen to be in a place where IR dating just ain't the most popular thing. I live in St. Louis, MO--and, depending on where you live or hang out, you'll see women like me, who are happily holding the hand of a man who's not black. And damn if he ain't happy too! And yes, there are times when someone will have a funky look or whatever--but the right person will know how to handle that. I think there's only been a few times where it looked like the guy I was with was going to have to say something...but mostly people stare. Who the hell cares is how I see it.
The problem might be that there are a helluva lot more white folks out here on POF--and almost ANY dating site that caters to all colors/ethnicities will be the same. Here's the thing though--you can't let that bother YOU. If you want to date a man who's not black, what are you doing to further that? Are you making friends with men and women who are like-minded? Or are you sitting there, pouting and unhappy because the guy you like ain't noticing you? Hmmm? Baby, men of ALL colors sometimes need a clue. If there's a guy that you're interested in, are you even saying hello to him? Or do you think, like many women apparently, that a man is supposed to know you're interested and don't understand cause he's not into you. You don't know if he is or not--all you know is that he's not talking to you. But are you talking to him? If not, then some of the belongs on your shoulders love. Only you can work on that.
And to the crazy ass white men who keep saying it's about penis size--give me a freaking break. You need to pull your heads out of your asses and get a clue. There are small d**ks in every color of the rainbow. To insult women in general by insinuating something so assinine shows your lack of intelligence, and again, willingness to believe some BS as a way to make yourself feel better when rejected. To the black man who constantly says that black women--excuse me, WOMEN, will pick a white man because of finances--you don't know how many women would vehemently disagree with you. Apparently the only threads you read have to do with interracial dating, or you'd know that there are some broke ass white men floating around trying to play that they aren't. And that, contrary to your belief, dating a white man is NOT trading up. Jesus...if I keep hearing that as an excuse from others to justify why a black woman isn't dating YOU. It's just not always the case. That's about as bad as black women trying to justify a black man dating a white woman "cause they're easy and will do anything for a black man." PFFFFFFTTTTT...apparently those women forget that there are black women who will roll over and play door mat just as fast as their white/asian/whatever counterparts. To the men in general who say "well black women just aren't attractive to me", something tells me that if Halle Berry switched by you and said hi, you'd change your mind quicker than sh*t.
It's perfectly OK to have a preference and it's even more ok to not justify said preference to anyone else but yourself. And if you have a PREJUDICE well goody for you cause that's all your business too. I am trying to remember if this is a free world or not...oh wait...mostly it IS. And because it is, you can date or not date whoever the hell you want to and it ain't nobody's biznazz but yours and the person you're dating (well as long as said dating partner is of legal age wherever you are).
Instead of saying "why isn't there _________?", figure out a way to make what you want HAPPEN. Realize that not everyone is going to be your flavor, and vice versa. I can only hope that you've reconsidered the victim position you originally took when you posted this. A strong woman will attract a good man--regardless of his color or yours. A weak woman will attract a leech--again, there's no color involved in ignorance.
AFL...
Well maybe it was more like a dollar. But times is tough...! | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 8:34:27 PM | | I live in south carolina, what the media says is racist, but at 31, I have been with 2 black women- but check my pic, I got sum dark skin, not sure if that makes a difference. Down here, black women want a black man- I cant say much more than that. I think if you are worried about white women being with black men, you have watched too many pornos. Trust me, it feels the same. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 9:48:55 PM | | While NYC can definitely have issues, I can honestly say being a black woman, if you put yourself out there and if you are attractive, educated, well spoken, in shape, and especially if you don't have children, you will not have a problem getting men in NYC approaching/wanting to date you no matter what ethnicity...I think there's something in the water...NY men tend to be really confident! Since living here, I've had relationships with both European and white American men...and NYC white men definitely haven't hesitated in contacting me on this site. I'm really not into the club scene and I'm not into the guys at my gym, so I'm trying this site...I've updated my profile and posted a pic 3 weeks ago, so far so good... | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/10/2009 10:55:20 PM | | this is to jajoinla ur profile sounds like u r defeated urself, u r very beautiful u know that but like i said here in dallas black women dont date white men only african women seem to, i try to talk to black american women all the time the dark ones too but all they say is no white men allowed | |
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MNaja
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Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 146 | |
| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/11/2009 6:21:56 AM | I'm of mixed blood and I mostly date men who are outside of my race (white/asian/hispanic/native amer., etc.). It's just a preference I have because of what I'm looking for. Not saying that I don't love African-American men. I do. It's just that, most of the time, they always say: "You're not what I'm looking for." or "I'm not interested." Plus, I've had some none too thrilling experiences in the past with having relationships with them. Long story short: I haven't found an African-American male who has the qualities I'm after for a 'true' relationship. So, most of the men I contact or who contact me - just happen to be outside of my race.
I love dating all kinds of men - learning new backgrounds, etc. Gives a whole new experience to life and makes you more receptive to the world around you. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/11/2009 9:34:50 AM |
Even on POF, all you see is the usual done to the death combo between white women and black men..well what about white men why are you approaching us or pursuing us as often? what is going on?
Some groups enforce severe social (sometimes physical) consequences to interracial dating.
The more strongly one identifies with that group, the more likely they are going to follow and enforce the groups rules.
Sometimes people go outside their "rules" in order to belittle those of another group. Especially if there are greater rewards to the individual.
So a minority group member can "break" their rules in order to harm the majority's group or rules, but the majority group member can't harm the minority's rules without serious social (sometimes legal) consequences. As the majority's members are more prevalent, and since the population is larger it's more likely someone will go to extreme's to enforce the group's rules.
Sorry, oversimplification but still valid IMO. | |
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| Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/11/2009 4:50:16 PM | Ok Ok so Ive read the post but Im still wating for an answer to the subject from a white male. Be honest I see alot of black men dating white women ( for the record I am not offended when a black man dates a white woman or a woman of another race) I honestly believe that black men dont worry about being judged and I also believe when a black man brings a white woman home the family is going to welcome her with open arms . I think that if a white man brings a black woman home it will be different story and that is what keeps most white men from going after black women they dont want to have deal with having us in their personal lives. I could be wrong but I know some will disagree.
Why is it so rare to see white man and black woman together??? I want real and mature answer without the racial insults. | |
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