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Thread: cant get over her, and she wants to be friends

MizBexReturns

Joined: 3/17/2009
Msg: 26

cant get over her, and she wants to be friends Posted: 5/22/2009 7:42:12 AM
The answer is simple. You can not be friends with someone you are still in love with. Her insistence on being friends is mainly to relieve her own guilt. It doesn't benefit you whatsoever, at least right now. It's a win/lose situation. She wins (no guilt), you lose (pain, no recovery). If she broke it off with you then she needs to accept the consequences. That means no friendship, no contact, POOF -- you disappear from her life. Cut off all contact. No IM, no text, no calls, no cyber stalking, NOTHING. While you implement no contact, you need to focus on rebuilding your confidence and self-esteem. Lastly, I ask you: "What can she offer you as a friend that you can not have with a REAL friend?" Answer: Nothing. Cheers. Jarbarian...as always I bow. Your posts help everyone, thank you. MizBex

heartsickman

Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 27

cant get over her, and she wants to be friends Posted: 5/22/2009 12:58:02 PM
Just pound down some beers bro

kent6560

Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 28
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cant get over her, and she wants to be friends Posted: 5/22/2009 1:57:42 PM
100% correct. I was and still am in the same situation. We broke it off, but she still calls or texts me everynight to talk about her day. I find that even just thinking about her tears me up. I have never been one to show feelings well so i dont let her see that it bothers me but when i get back home i am going to have to man up and just say goodbye, no more talking, hanging out or facebook. If you still love her set her free, if she comes back its ment to be. But bearing that in mind i give kudos to those that make a relationship work after a breakup. The feelings of resentment are always and are very hard to get rid of. Love her from a distance, keep her in your heart and hold onto the memories that you have, being friends only ends up replaceing the good memorires with bad ones, as the feelings never go away. it has been 7 years since my wife and got divorced, but they are still there. i will always be willing to help her but would never get back together with her, cant get over her leaving. So i think that you are going to have to break all ties, mourn the loss of your love, and move on man.

Bryan777

Joined: 7/25/2008
Msg: 29
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cant get over her, and she wants to be friends Posted: 5/22/2009 7:18:00 PM
I just spent the last 11 months trying to be friends with my ex... Dude, it doesn't work. It's gonna hurt any way you look at it so take the short path and bail out. The alternative is you tearing yourself apart over every word or action from her. That can go on forever and that's not really healthy... trust me I know. Having the love of your life break up with you and saying "we can still be friends" is like your dog dying and your mom saying "you can still keep it".

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> cant get over her, and she wants to be friends