| I am off to the airport!!!
Posted: 9/23/2005 11:21:43 PM | Hello this is what I yearn for! I want to be a mom and this makes me want to be a mom even more. I am blessed to be a God Mother though and that is a fun job. I hope one day im as blessed as you all are. The one thing I want most is to be a mom and have that bonding feeling a mother and child have. I am glad your daughter is ok. I lost my dad at 4 months old and it is hard knowing I dont have a mother and a father but I was blessed enough to have grandparents raising me grandparents are so wonderful and loving and caring and I was spoiled growing up and theone48060 sorry that post was for my friend shes the single one im the married one. im sorry guys i got off the topic but i just wanted to put my two sence into this that grandparents are wonderful and I cant wait to be a mom! BTW I have 4 furbabies and they are my life I would take the kitties everywhere with me if I could! LOL well its 2am and im really tired so I will talk to you guys later
very sad story
Annamarie | |
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| I want to hug the whole sky. My daughter is there now.
Posted: 9/24/2005 8:02:38 PM | My heart is breaking for you....I share custody with my childrens father and every other week they go away. It doesn't get easier but like me, please take some comfort in knowing that you are doing the right thing in allowing your sweet little girl to grow.
I hope you feel lighter soon. Write me if you'd like, if you are feeling lonely I'd be happy to talk with you. | |
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| Learning to be Mom again
Posted: 9/24/2005 11:01:13 PM | >>>> smile*with*your*eyes
Thank you for reading this thread and thank you for sharing my experience!
Yes, nowadays we have all means of communication.
My daughter wasn't a bit surprised when I reached her with a phone call in Frankfurt' airport.
Kids are so used to the wonders of modern technology...
But even daily phonecalls didn't prevent me from what I feared the most - my daughter discovering the advantages of being the only granddaughter.
:Why do I have to load dishwasher? My Granma told me, I'm too young for that!"
Baby... before you left, you were even younger. But ever since 10, you had been doing this easy chore to help your Mom, and you never complained about it, more, you rushed to the dishwasher the very second you heard the buzz... Just because you knew that your help will make me happy and I will treat you to your favorite cookies...
"Why do I have to make my sandwiches? Granma never let me go into kitchen!"
Just because you are almost 12 now and your own Mom works long hours and gets tired and it's nice tp have fresh sandwiches, not sitting in the fridge overnight.
"Why" and "why" and "why". And every one of those "why"s cutting my heart open. I thought I was very succesful at being a Mom.
Well... three weeks into being home and it still feels like she is visiting. If you know what I mean...
Cheers,
Feline. | |
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| I want to hug the whole sky. My daughter is there now.
Posted: 9/24/2005 11:03:59 PM | >>> chryslergirl
Thank you so much!
I am working on "feeling lighter".
Just there are still too many clouds on my horizon.
Funny as it is, seems like I need more help and advice now, then when she was gone.
All the Best to you and your kids!
Feline | |
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| Learning to be Mom again
Posted: 9/25/2005 12:42:17 PM | Feline, you were a successful Mom before her trip. Granma had a lot of time to spoil her and make it a "vacation" experience instead of day to day life. You've just got some re-programming to do, that's all. There is nothing about that which reflects upon your success as a mother.
Sounds to me as if all these "whys" are a result of her complete freedom from responsibility while on vacation. I don't think you need to explain every single "why" question in detail...just a gentle reminder to her that this is how our life was before your vacation, now you are home, and we are living the way we did before.
Hugs to you!
-sparkle | |
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| Learning to be Mom again
Posted: 9/25/2005 12:55:11 PM |
Might sound a bit nasty, but, honestly, this is a totally different child now.
LOL - no Feline, it doesn't sound nasty at all - because you're right. She is a different child now than she was before. She has experienced a lot recently, and things are different than they were. But that will never change - 3 months from now, she will be a different child than she is today. As Sparkle said - gentle reminders from you will help her along.
But she will always be growing, always be learning - and always be testing you - to see where the boundaries are, see what she can get away with, see what the limitations are. And I do NOT mean that in a bad way. It's what our children do! But they actually WANT boundaries and limits - that's what makes them feel safe.
I'm sure you will both do just fine! | |
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0tto
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Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 157 | |
| Learning to be Mom again
Posted: 9/25/2005 10:58:12 PM |
"Why" and "why" and "why".
don't worry. everything will be back in track. you only must be lil firm.
and you know for me handling my "baby" harder. he even don't ask "why" but just did what he wanna to do :) | |
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| I want to hug the whole sky. My daughter is there now.
Posted: 9/26/2005 9:27:41 AM | I know the feeling -- my kids see their granny in the states for a couple of weeks each summer. Her idea of grocery shopping with them is , "Does anything on this aisle look good to you?' My idea of grocery shopping is,"These 2 cereals are under $3, which one do you want?"
My mantra is this and it works with both grandparents and the other parent:
Different houses have different rules
You are doing a great job and I can tell you love your daughter very much! | |
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