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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/11/2006 11:59:40 PM | there is a good thing to having one & a bad thing to having one also....
Good thing: is if u need sex they are the ones to call when u get a bit horny and needed some lovin'
Bad thing: is when they decided to date someone else exclusively that ruins everything not just for the both of u but just for u because then u have to find someone new to be your boy toy....
I have gone through a bunch of friends with benefits in my lifetime after my last engagement ended in June of this year & highly unlikely i dont recommend it at all because esp if its not your style or you are not used to that then you are meant to have a total disappointment & hurt in the process.... or even a stalker which i have gotten scared because he got mad when i decline to sleep with him ever again.... | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/12/2006 2:32:02 AM | i do believe that this is a great idea... my best friend (yes he is a he) let our relationship go to this level almost two years ago... we never say i love you, feelings on his part got involved about six months into it, we took about a month off, and everything is great. He is supportive in so many ways and respects that if i meet someone and get into a relationship it ends. we hook up about 4 times a month and let it be... we can both try things and critique each other without being hurt...
 FWB can be awesome in so many ways | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/15/2006 5:58:44 PM | | I think having someone to go to when you need some sex is great. But you gotta set your boundaries BEFORE you to that. I once had a FWB and it was great.......but it wasn't just all sex. But one day, I met someone and decided to be bf, gf and I couldn't do that with this friend anymore, we just remained friends WITHOUT benefits. wouldn't be fair to not give that relationship a chance. It didn't work out with the guy I dated, and when the FWB found out, he wanted us to be FWB again, but I couldn't do that again because of personal reasons, and now he won't talk to me anymore........ so perhaps it's not a good idea........You should just be intimate with someone you see a future with.........someone always ends up getting hurt that way. | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/15/2006 7:02:35 PM | Do what ever you like, is it good or bad? ,this is simple really just sex, one will eventually get attatched, or it will go on as just sex no more and thats fine but i would defintly practice safe sex, friends with benefits means no committment no obligation, whilest you might stary under those circumstances he most proberly will given the opprtnuity.
With your kids being the most important thing to you they come first and there mother being infected with something wont be too great for them, but you might say ''what if i can trust him?''
Well the whole idea of the freinds with benefits arrangment is that he has no obligation to not sleep with anyone else, even if he promises he wont, with no emotional attachment he will once a fresher newer more desirable piece of **** is put under his nose.
Dosnt matter how attractive you might be there will always be someone better and more appealing to him in someway, and im just repeating myself here he has no obligation not to take that **** up on its offer. | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/15/2006 8:00:41 PM | | Yes it's perfectly fine if you guys are both ok with it. Sometimes when theres sex involved, girls can get attached but if your not that kind of girl, then yeah nothing wrong with fufilling needs :-) | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/17/2006 6:52:41 PM | TLC4TLC, if feel that it isn't what god wants for you than so be it.
however many of us are not religious.
I've only had one friend with benefits. It was an ex-gf.
With the right 2 people, friend with benefits can be good while you're both single and not dating anyone. At least you're not sexually frustrated and may help you from rushing into a relationship that is not good because you are frustrated.
You just have to be careful about it and be aware of any signs the other is developing any feelings about wanting more. | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits? but I wouldnt recommend it if your friendship suffers
Posted: 12/23/2006 9:01:07 PM | Well to be honest here??? I am somewhat disappointed when someone claims to care for u then over-reacts in something that isnt true that ruins everything....
I myself wouldnt ever try a friends with benefits relationship at all EVER because it just doesnt hurt your relationship.... friendship suffers the most because it happened to me with this special person (he knows who he is). We were planning to have something more but then for one misconception everything is gone down the drain....
We had chemistry, we relate well with each other & just a miscommunication and over reacting over something that isnt really what happen ruined everything between us... I hate to admit I do miss sharing things with him & I am sure he miss sharing things with me because we had an instant connection from online, over the phone & in meeting each other we had sparks with each other as well.... And also we related everything in syncronize....... but then through exchange of words & emails that were given to each other in hurtful manner ruined what could've have been something special between us....
thanks | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/27/2006 8:39:24 AM | | Whether its friends with benefits or a bf gf relationship its unavoidable that someone gets hurt in most cases. I once filled the roll of a friend with benefits for 4 years until she ran off and got married. I knew about the new suitor and accepted the possibility she would succumb and I was fine with it when it happened because she was honest about it from day one. We are still friends and one day her new relationship may not work out and we could pick up where we left off ...but no I think your right once it is in the past it stays in the past. We will always be friends now. I think these fwb arrangements work better the older the male is because they are less inclined to chase anything in a skirt. They are happy with their friend and generally find their time too limited to spread themselves around. Just my opinion and experience to add to this forum. The key to success was knowing the boundries and expecting no more than that. then we could enjoy each other to the maximum. | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/27/2006 12:02:32 PM | the problem that can occurr is that someone will get attached and then hurt... and the someone can be you!
but it is better to say that out of the gate then to tell someone that you love them and want to spend the rest of your life with them and then dump them cause you are not ready!
So give it a try and be honest from the get go! | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/27/2006 1:23:23 PM | | ^^^ agreed...It's fine as long as you are both perfectly honest with each other about what it is. It usually goes to shi* because one or the other develops an attachment of some kind to their "friend". | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/29/2006 11:55:16 PM | | being in the same kind of situation (single mom/long ex relationship) i tryed a friend with benifits thing. it was good but after seeing my friend a few times i soon realized that in order for me to truely enjoy what we were doing i would need to get seriously envolved with this man and that was not what i wanted. i also had a girl friend having a friend with benifits and she ended falling for the guy cause she to needed that conecting emotion it got her a broken heart. another thing is if you found a friend with benifits in my opinion if you dont want him envolved with family ties than it is best to keep it a secret booty call from your children. it spares the heart ace and unwanted bonding between part time partner and children. | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 12/30/2006 12:24:33 AM | | Is it ok to have a friend with Benifits... hmmmm.. I think it is fine... I just got out of one awhile ago.... and it was good, we were both there for each other when we needed each other.. We had made the arrangement, so we both knew that if feelings developed we could easily step out. So yes, it is good, if you disscuss it first, because if you jump into it... emotions could go flying...So would I do it again? .... I guess I could.. but it would all depend on the Man and what the situation was like... | |
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| Is it ok to have a friend with benefits.....???????????
Posted: 4/5/2007 4:46:15 PM |
As long as you are both on the same page at all times, why not? But beware, 99% of the time, it goes to shit.
How do you even know if you are both on the same page? That 99% figure is probably because they aren't even reading the same book. | |
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