| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/18/2009 8:33:55 PM | It's nothing more than us all being products of our environment.
Some of us learned not to be inhibited about who and what we are and are proud of it. In my case, I think perhaps I witnessed my father's occasional frustration with my mother's inability to help him on home projects and since working with my hands appealed to me, I volunteered to do it and learn. I know that the knowledge saved us (during my marriage) a lot of money over the years, and I'm not upset that I know what I know ... I'm proud of it.
Then again, some guys feel they have to rule the roost, get in there and take charge and be a "decision maker". In that case, a woman who would try to assert herself into that activity would probably be considered over-bearing and might even intimidate some men.
There are no doubt women who applaud such a "take-over" type of guy. Perhaps they need someone to run their lives and actually look up to that. I'm not sure why and simply can't imagine not being part of a "decision making" activity ... but then again, perhaps such women lived that environment while growing up and are quite comfortable with that.
There are men (as is apparent by the posts here) who actually appreciate a practical woman (able to help with most projects), smart woman (able to have an intelligent conversation), and even a talented (whoops ... skilled) woman (able to go out with him and participate in his favorite free-time activity and actually keep up).
Different strokes for different folks.
I really don't think it matters about the different personality needs of men or women ... as long as we find what fits us best and don't have to struggle with accepting such differences that might occur.
I know women who are very happily married to men who wouldn't be able to put a nail in the wall to hang a picture ... and they are perfectly happy to do it instead ... or hire the work done. I grew up with a man and was also married to a man who was able to do just about anything and can honestly tell you I would be very frustrated with a man who was not mechanically inclined or not able to do things around the house.
We don't need to be intimidated by our partners ... or any kind of personality out there. We just need to be able to recognize it when we see it and choose not to get involved if we know it will create problems ... eh? | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/18/2009 10:32:59 PM |
...You had better quit those classes or your going to be on PoF for a very, very long time.  btw...I like the new pics. ...maeflowers 
aw shucks,,, what approach do you think I should take?
and thanks,,, I always liked the "not high maintenance one of yours,,,  | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 6:13:44 AM | Dawn; As I stated, most of the responses were from those who are younger. I welcome their opinions as I do yours. What I meant by saying those over 60 have more valid opinions was because they may have experienced what this thread is all about. But those younger, may in the future.
Phoebe; Happy Birthday! You're 60 now, so your opinion is valid as of now!
:
But seriously, I understand that this could happen in even younger people. However, I was coming from my age group point of view. I must say that when I was in my 50's, I did not encounter this situation among men in their 40's and 50's. Since that is the age that I usually date or have been in relationships with most recently, I can truthfully say that I still have not!
I could start a thread about men in general, of any age, who are intimidated by sexy women. Or women, in general , of any age, who are intimidated by sexy men. But, I'll leave that to those who are experiencing that now, at a younger age. I doubt if there are many men, unless for health reasons, in their 40's or 50's who would feel inadequate with a sexy woman of any age.
I have never been with a man over 60, so I did not start this because of being dumped or snubbed by a man over 60. Some men over 60 are just as sexy as ever, with no need to be intimidated by any woman, of any age. I was only making an observation about the men of somewhat advanced age who think they no longer have what it takes to satisfy a sexy woman.
Sexy means different things to different people. Intelligent, talented, confident, looks, personality, attitude, etc.
No more explaining from me! Post your thoughts, wherever the thread title takes you.
All are welcome. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 8:05:02 AM | abby156:
If the man or woman makes an effort to take care of themself as best they can: older does not mean unsexy. There are a number of women my age (50's) at the YMCA where I workout who are very sexy. I also attend a ballroom dance on Friday evenings and there are plenty of sexy 40 and 50 year olds that make me go home and take a cold shower. Add to this a personality developed over a lifetime and that's quite a prize to find. In my opinion, older doesn't need to mean put out to pasture. In fact, younger men wouldn't have the hot's for older women if the woman they are targeting wasn't sexy to some degree. In my view there are lot's of sexy women on POF including yourself (did I make points).
Cottor (Some of us learned not to be inhibited about who and what we are and are proud of it.):
FOr the most part your statement is correct. However, as I stated above, there are some characteristics that human's have, that we do have control of. We need to make a concerted effort to work on those items within our control. All to often men and women give up and say, "why can't you just take me as I am"? In a way, that's a bit selfish if the person (man or woman) is 50 pounds (roughly 23kG) overweight and dresses like they have just been working in the garden.
(a "take-over" type of guy)
Granted, Women don't want a CONTROLING type of man. You womenfolk don't like being a carpet to be walked on. However, the majority of women want a man who will 'LEAD'. They also want that man to listen to what they have to say and be taken seriously. Lead doesn't mean control. I've read plenty of women's profiles and in a good percentage they want a man who will lead, yet, the man should listen to what their woman's idea's and desires are. I've followed a number of topics on POF and one in particular. Women seem to like a man who will lead and be aggressive in a loving manner when it comes to sex. Sure there are times in the bedroom when women like to show agressiveness but this is the exception and not the rule. Women don't want an uncontrolable wild animal but one who will be agressive in a loving and gentle manner. And sometimes finding this combination can be difficult. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 8:29:04 AM | "Women seem to like a man who will lead and be aggressive in a loving manner when it comes to sex. Sure there are times in the bedroom when women like to show agressiveness but this is the exception and not the rule."
Does this mean I can stop practicing with my bullwhip? (I do have to admit I snap myself as often as my target.)
Maybe if I put in my profile that I've hung it up, I'll get more responses... | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 3:14:40 PM | Bwahahaha! Neither topic nor first sentence, both questions, mentioned an age, let alone 60+. It's both classless and rude behavior, but especially obtuse acting-out, for a well-written-enough OP to behave not just "as if" the subject is only about 60+, but harass other posters. Simply crass throughout.
I'm intimidated only by an intimidating wall put up by others. Most often it's verbal-based as I have a touch of (high functioning deficiency). I was raised with class, practice kindness, and shoot from the hip. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 3:49:43 PM | BALANCE. In everything there has to be balance.
I have no doubt that some of the ladies her were mistreated by their spouses. The problem seems to be that since he won't listen to you're complaints you take them out on everyother man especially here on these forums. We don't look like or have the same name as your ex-husband. Please stop taking your frustrations with him out on us. This does nothing but cause arguments and turn off the male population here on the area of POF's forum. I'm sure there are men who do this and should stop but women seem to have a propensity for this.
We're not your ex-husband: please stop blaming us and treating us for what he may have done. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 4:04:41 PM | BALANCE. In everything there has to be balance.
I have no doubt that some of the ladies her were mistreated by their spouses. The problem seems to be that since he won't listen to you're complaints you take them out on everyother man especially here on these forums. We don't look like or have the same name as your ex-husband. Please stop taking your frustrations with him out on us. This does nothing but cause arguments and turn off the male population here on the area of POF's forum. I'm sure there are men who do this and should stop but women seem to have a propensity for this.
We're not your ex-husband: please stop blaming us and treating us for what he may have done.
Dave,
When either sex displays that type of behavior, they do the members of the opposite sex a huge favor,,,
When I see someone that makes blanket statements or generalizations and they are someone that I had viewed as a potential interest, I make sure it won't happen by various methods,,, I don't want to have to deal with someone like that in my everyday life,,,
Let them rant !  | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 4:07:41 PM |
I'm sure there are men who do this and should stop but women seem to have a propensity for this.
That's because you're only seeing it in the women's posts! Read some of the men here - bloody hell, bitterness isn't just a gender issue, ya know... | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 4:20:24 PM | "We're not your ex-husband: please stop blaming us and treating us for what he may have done."
LOL! If I were blaming all men and treating them as if they were responsible for the things my ex did [my ex husband, not the one that passed away], I'd be luring all I could to into my cave and meeting them with a baseball bat or a loaded .45.
Belive me, if I blame anyone, it's myself for getting tangled up with him in the first plaace. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 4:30:13 PM |
I might be intimidated by a dead woman, but not by a merely old woman
OBVIOUSLY (and luckily) Mr lepetitehomme.. you've not met any of my ex-wives..
I assure you that had you..
then , now as I do..
the ONLY women YOU'D date are ones
that CANNOT box or knife fight better then yourself..
Those are my standards..
and although it has cut down on the "available fish" here in the pond..
I no more have to ask..
"is it O-K if I come to bed now, honey..??"
This thread gettin way to hot..
I'm outta here....
---SoldierByte--- | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 5:38:58 PM | | You're correct, however, what the women do that men tend not to do is gang up on one particular person of the opposite gender. Men will eventually get tired of the ranting and say something and go on but there is a group of females who can't seem to let a dead dog lie. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 5:59:29 PM |
there is a group of females who can't seem to let a dead dog lie.
While that might invariably be the case, I have to say that I prefer to hold out for the proverbial flogged dead horse. 
OT: To me, one who purposely relishes intimidating another person equates to someone who could very possibly be a bully. I much prefer to surround myself with people who are comfortable with me and I with them on equal levels. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/19/2009 6:45:19 PM |
I much prefer to surround myself with people who are comfortable with me and I with them on equal levels.
Me tooooo........
specially if they bring me beer and pizza
while I'm layin on their couch watchin T-V....
I just luvs my equals........
---SoldierByte--- | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/20/2009 5:04:34 AM | Is it safe to peep back in here yet?
I agree that I can't see why anyone would want to be intimidating in any way, in a relationship. Doesn't seem like any good relationship could survive that! I would not want to intimidate nor be intimidated by a partner in romance. It should be about love, respect, and equality. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/20/2009 5:23:43 AM |
I can't see why anyone would want to be intimidating in any way
Intimidation is mostly in the eye of the beholder. People are intimidated because of what they think, not necessarily because of what one actually does or will do. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/20/2009 5:52:07 AM |
I'm intimidated only by an intimidating wall put up by others. Most often it's verbal-based as I have a touch of (high functioning deficiency). I was raised with class, practice kindness, and shoot from the hip.
I love this. This is the answer. At the beginning of singles ville I behaved with a chip on my shoulder. I didn't want to be single so I made myself be so independent that I didn't need anyone....My Husband died and I felt vulnerable. So I became so independent of everything and everyone. I think I needed that for awhile. I was angry and unhappy and very sad. For myself it was a wall. If I was intimidating than no one would bother me for very long. Even if they thought I was cute or sexy....they didn't want to be with someone that didn't need anyone. And I figured out everyone needs humans....male or female. We need that magic touch that kindness and that wonderful listening ear. Being independent has its perks. But reaching out to another human being and risk being rejected hurts. So for myself it was to prevent anyone male or female from getting to close.....I rejected them before they rejected me.
Today I am learning balance. I still want to be cute and sexy and independent.....but I want to be able to also be vulnerable, trusting and enjoy love. Whenever that old thing comes up that I am intimated.......I trust it sometimes others aren't trust worthy and I need to take notice of it.......I need to trust my instinct.
I don't think that men or women are intimated by independent people....I think it is what they either like or dislike how they have been raised and what they find desirable. And what they find attractive.....it usually has nothing to do with me. | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/20/2009 7:28:38 AM | Thanks all for the birthday wishes...................Yes, it was a good one!!!
And what they find attractive.....it usually has nothing to do with me.
I too, practice kindness and shoot from the hip. If that intimidates some men, then so be it..............I'm going to carry on.......being too sexy for my jeans and my age.......
Glances 'round, checks out shoulders........Nope, no chips there! | |
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/20/2009 8:05:16 AM | No such thing as being too sexy for your age. I did a thread once about "Should older women try to de-sexy-fy themselves?" What prompted that thread was when a couple of teenage boys were flirting with me, just from seeing me as I was walking, not seeing my face. They had no idea of my age. It was embarrassing!
I had on my usual everyday warm weather outfit of shorts and tank top. That got me to thinking that maybe I should start wearing old lady clothes (sweats/baggy shorts,jeans with the elastic waist, fat shorts, etc.)
Then I thought, "Nope". I will not try to play my sexy-ness down. I don't try to look sexy. All I know to be is myself. I will continue to be me and dress comfortably in clothes that I like. Because the fact is that no matter how much we cover up, there are those who will find us sexy. It's an attitude, an air, the way we carry ourselves, and not something voluntary that we do.
Go sexy ladies!! Of any age. Wear those sexy jeans, shorts, or whatever! I do. The kind of men we (at least I) like would not be intimidated by us. Go sexy guys! Of any age! I see this one man, sometimes coming from the gym, who must be at least 70, and he is sexy! WOW! I say, Go sexy guys!!
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| Are older men sometimes intimidated by older sexy women?
Posted: 9/20/2009 8:19:59 AM | No such thing as being too sexy for your age. Trugold: This reminds me, for some reason, of the television show "Gunsmoke," and Marshal Matt Dillon and Miss Kitty. The actors had on screen 'electricity' and sex appeal for 20 years. As they aged, they still had that electricity between them, and Matt and Kitty still had that sex appeal, though aging. When you've got it, you've got it. | |
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