| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/23/2009 11:22:35 AM | ^^^Again, you have not been around that long. These things come up over and over again, by the same posters, these and others. Not just about the vagina thing, but a myriad of things they find in older women, low libidos, for one, and other things having to do with being post menopausal. When I first came on POF, I was astounded at the descriptions of women who were post menopausal or over 50. All from men with laundry lists of reasons women in that category were past being desirable. It's pure misogyny. It's the equivalent of women saying all men over 50 have ED and just sit in their Lazy Boy all day in their underwear drinking beer.
And their posts are only partially backed up by the sources....these are problems, like ED, that some women have for various reasons.
As Saffire said, it's the mythology. And I do not think that the source that was quoted who said 'use it or lose it' is true can possibly be a credible source. That is not the terminology a serious professional physician would use...for one thing it is far too simplistic. And the use it or lose it myth applies to both men and women: I don't like symplistic thinking. Vindictiveness is also a trait I find to be very distasteful. And shows great lack of character. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/23/2009 1:34:40 PM | Ismene: I agree that there are hateful men on here- I've encountered them. And I ignore them because their attitude is obvious. I'm just cautioning not to label things that way if they're not. Maybe the issue is the opposite= because I've been here less time I don't see things with those eyes. I can't be bothered with those type of people and i don't get nuts with them. I just see them for the people they are- angry, bitter, with an agenda- and I ignore their comments.
That's all. I know there are misogynists- I didn't think this was. And the use it or lose it expression is not professional- but in every day parlance it's the same thing as the Mayo recommended. Maybe more base- but accurate. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/23/2009 1:53:15 PM | Sorry, ismene, the information is correct.
The vagina does shrink in some women after menopause - and it does feel a great deal tighter...(so I've read..lol..). It can make sex extremely painful. It also happens to middle-aged and older women who don't have sex.
However, a good gynaecologist can fix this - together with some KY..
I think the word "atrophying" is a little over the top and should probably be taken into context as a medical term. To laypeople, it probably sounds like it's disintegrating or something...
And the use or lose it thing applies equally to men. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/23/2009 2:06:08 PM | | ^^^My point was that it is not something that automatically happens to all or most women as has been suggested in these forums numerous times. It is like ED, it happens to 'some' and for various reasons, not just going through menopause or being celibate. And even being celibate is not necessarily an issue if a woman has a little 'friend.' Anyway, I did ask a doctor about this curious thing and was told what I'm saying now, basically that it isn't just a given, anymore than for men is it a given they have ED. I think if anyone is curious or concerned about these things they should talk to experts and not get information from forums like this. I read all kinds of things in here that blew my mind, things I didn't experience at all, so I asked a doctor about them in order to get true information. Also, I do know women who have gone for years, during middle age, w/o sex, and who after becoming active again, do not have this problem. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/23/2009 6:08:42 PM | [Perhaps it is true what friends have told me- "Usually if a man of over 50 is single, there is a very valid reason"]
So sexist and jaundiced view of men! There's always a reason why people of any age and sex are single. Your single lady friends should know that already. One such reason could be the conceit of feeling I am God's gift to anybody. Physical fitness is not synonymous with 2 hours a day at the gym. Might be considered obsessive. And which 57 yr old knows what younger people want in a person. Sometimes they see it in older people. Wish it happened to me! | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/24/2009 4:16:53 AM |
...I agree, ten years is about as young as I would go. Any younger than that takes me out of my comfort zone.
That's one thing I'm missing, having someone with a similar point of reference. Sometimes when I talk music with someone, they don't know who I'm talking about or I don't know who they're talking about. The same with watching movies. I try to stay current but... | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/24/2009 8:09:01 AM | Rick Springfield is still hot!! Anyone who watches General Hospital knows that. From time to time, he is a regular on that soap.
In my opinion, he's even hotter now than he was back in the day.
As an older woman who is in great shape, I don't chase after younger men. It's the other way around, so I usually end up with much younger men. I haven't seen any evidence, in my life, of older men shunning older women. Could be that they are just having a hard time finding an older woman who can keep up with them.
Same here, when it comes to older men. I prefer one who is healthy, reasonably fit, and on the same page when it comes to healthy living. The same when the man is much younger. To me, it's not the age, but the physical, mental and emotional condition.
Maybe, if in fact older men are shunning older women, it has nothing to do with the age of the woman. Maybe there's just something about her that they are not attracted to. Takes more than just looks or physical condition. Personality, attitude, views on everyday issues, etc.
On the issue of older women becoming atrophied in certain areas, or shrinking, the term "use it or lose it" can be applied. However, leading a healthy, active lifestyle can also prevent this from happening. There are other ways, which I won't mention here. But when it comes to age and sex issues in women, at my age, I know quite a lot about it. Made it a point to learn, so that those issues won't happen with me.
My advice to older women. Exercise, Exercise, Exercise!! Daily walking is enough to keep certain areas of the body in great shape. Yoga is good. Pilates, etc. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 8/24/2009 8:51:27 PM |
Personally, I'd have a problem with a health care professional, such as a gynecologist, that tells me what I want to hear, rather than the truth I think it is an American thing...this leap of illogic, to assume that medical professionals cannot be trusted, that they pacify patients with false information, etc. It is also a prevalent idea that women are often treated this way, as children, by their doctors. Such a perspective seems to be part of, for some Americans, a distrust of authority at a very deep level. And this, coupled with the apparent fact that so many prefer to believe what they read in 'best sellers' which exaggerate and misinform in order to be more sensational and sell books, or they prefer to believe information disseminated in public forums by lay people, can, I suppose, lead to such an automatic assumption that what a doctor tells a patient is less factual than what they read in forms, hear as gossip or glean from best sellers.
I'd prefer to get my information from a doctor than from a public forum like this, even if people cut and paste small bits of data from various internet sites or best sellers. I don't distrust doctors, but I don't believe in conspiracy theories either. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/10/2009 4:48:25 PM | | I was thanking my lucky stars when I was reading a wonderful profile from a man who was spiritual, open-minded, great communicater, interested in the heart, mind, and soul, etc. etc. Everything was great until the end when he "had to admit" he had a strong preference for women 15 yrs. younger than he was. It negated everything he said up to that point about how the spiritual, mental, and emotional was what was important to him. Who was he trying to fool? | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/10/2009 4:57:10 PM |
Everything was great until the end when he "had to admit" he had a strong preference for women 15 yrs. younger than he was. It negated everything he said up to that point about how the spiritual, mental, and emotional was what was important to him. Who was he trying to fool?
So? I have a few women friends with whom I have wonderful "mental and emotional" connections, but I'm not interested in having a romantic/physical relationship with them. I can also see connecting in that way with a very old, infirm man, but I wouldn't want to date him, either. What's wrong with that? | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/10/2009 8:56:24 PM | Hi Stagecoachred,
Son of a gun. I don't know what the guys in your area are thinking.?Your one good looking lady, and got the smarts also. What a combination. If you were here on the island, you'd have to beat me away from the door.
You have your profile together, a cute smile, intelligent, and outdorsy also. Gotta love a girl who can kayak. Maybe the guys in your area are wussies 
Girl you have it all together. Just hang in there, he'll be by befote you know it.
Smoothjazz | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/10/2009 9:24:38 PM | Older men chasing younger women are on an ego trip ( a BIG one) they want to show off ,are very insecure. Besides, most of the public take it for granted she is his daughter. The younger woman may not have high esteem of herself and she may be after his money if he's rich or close to it. It is a cryin' shame because most older women have money and are better lovers. An older man with a very much younger woman are mostly classed as "pamper huggers" like in diapers????? | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/10/2009 11:21:47 PM | In response to the OP: why waste time worrying what some shallow superficial little boy thinks or does? Remember this, juveniles come in all ages! If some 50-60 yr. old wants to chase after someone whom he has absolutely nothing in common with, who cares? Anybody with eyes knows why a guy that age wants a 25 yr. old girl...1) it's because he loves spending a lot of money for 3 minutes of pleasure.( In other words... neither one of them knows what they're doing in bed) 2)He likes to "pretend" he's into the same music she likes....3)He loves hanging out with all her" cool" friends. 4)He can learn all about the latest "trends" in order to have more things in common with his grandkids. And 5).. he knows he cannot satisfy a "woman" in any way at all, so why torture his already-battered ego?
Personally I would feel kind of like a "baby-raper" if I were to date someone young enough to be my granddaughter. As far as I'm concerned, these guys are leaving all the "real women" for all of the "real men"!
Sincerely, Sho-me | |
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