| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/21/2009 4:38:23 PM |
Multi-lingual, multi-cultural, well read, articulate, talented, attractive, knowledgeable about world affairs and politics, gourmet cook and fine wines, travelled, well respected in our careers, social outlets, loving
There are scads of 25-year-olds (of both genders) who also fit that description.
our only sins-----------------we aren't 25
It's not a "sin." It's individual men who don't find individual women (of any age) - even those who have all those listed attributes - ATTRACTIVE TO THEM.
If a man does not appreciate us.............he does not deserve us.
Well I should hope not. That would be mean. He doesn't want us. It's NOT his loss. Or ours. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/21/2009 5:18:13 PM |
The moral of the story is "why buy the cow when the calf costs the same?" Hmmm I didn't spend any money for my bull, don't feel like he bought me except with love. Of course I guess he would be considered a calf. I sure as fertilizer, won't let anyone call me a daggone cow, sow, or any other barn yard animal. I'm not a cougar, I didn't devour him. Gosh, I guess all these stupid cliches mean absolutely freaking nothing.
I really don't understand the need for putting anyone down, young, old, or in between. If a dude doesn't get that age means nothing, that his problem. Next...
I don't see older men with younger women in my area, but maybe I don't see ages, but people. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/21/2009 5:33:49 PM | There are scads of 25-year-olds (of both genders) who also fit that description. no where in my post does it indicate that 25 year olds don't have those attributes. There are alot of brilliant, articulate, talented 25 year olds-------most, not all, don't have the maturity that comes with time.
It's not a "sin." it is an analogy.........
He doesn't want us. It's NOT his loss. Or ours. while he may not want us...........he also may not realize what we offer when we are rejected simply by the number rather than the sum.................... | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/21/2009 7:19:19 PM |
he also may not realize what we offer when we are rejected simply by the number rather than the sum.
I'm sure I didn't make my point well. It's that IF a particular man isn't interested in women of (whatever) age - for whatever reason - "what we have to offer" is quite frankly nothing. Because he's not interested. (This applies to any scenario where people are complaining that they're being rejected for this reason or that reason.)
Further, I made my initial post way back when this thread started, and I also stand by that: just because someone rejects me, it doesn't mean he's necessarily only interested in "chasing 25-year-olds" and would reject ANOTHER 51-year-old woman, as the OP suggested. That reasoning is shoddy. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/22/2009 5:14:25 AM | | Older men who are fit make me more nervous than other men. You can never tell what they really want. The double-standard is in full play with this problem. No matter how far the women's movement has come, women are still viewed as old while older men are viewed as distinguished. They look at younger women because they know it's possible to still get one. While older women rarely get a younger man for anything more than just a sexual fling. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/22/2009 6:31:05 AM | At the risk of insulting more mature women I'll jump in. I love women, always have, always will. I'm a father to two lovely adult daughters, 28, 32. The thought of dating a woman close in age to my daughters is unappealing to me. I would like to find a keeper, a partner for the rest of my life. Often I find women in my age group to be wrapped up in grandchildren, work and possessions. Great, I love a person with interests, but I'm seeking someone to build a life with, together. I am not looking to exclude all aspects of her life, but damn, I want a partner who has the time to be spontaneous, to grab a jacket and take off for an adventure at a moments notice. Not balk about driving a couple of hours for lunch to a restaurant sitting on a bluff, above the ocean's edge, because the grandkids might drop by.
Sorry to be insulting, maybe it's just been my experience, but I want a fully engaged partner, on who hasn't lost the ability to go new places, learn new things, experience new thrills, laugh, love with abandon...continue living life. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/22/2009 6:39:49 AM | eastendwoman:
"Older men who are fit make me more nervous than other men."
Why does a older fit man make you nervous?
What double standard are you referring to? There are numerous double standards within our society. Some benefit men and some benefit women. It all depends on which side of the gender divide one is from. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/22/2009 6:59:28 AM |
Often I find women in my age group to be wrapped up in grandchildren, work and possessions. Great, I love a person with interests, but I'm seeking someone to build a life with, together. I am not looking to exclude all aspects of her life, but damn, I want a partner who has the time to be spontaneous,
hrlyguy,
True of men as well, who are more comfortable watching television, talking about their portfolio or business conquests, than heading out for a day, hiking, biking or just seeing where the day will take us. Dinners out, a movie or a show are all fun; I'd rather plunge into an icy lake than talk about the recent plunge in the economy while having an article in the WSJ read aloud to me.
Works both ways. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/22/2009 7:37:49 AM |
I'd rather plunge into an icy lake than talk about the recent plunge in the economy while having an article in the WSJ read aloud to me.
Works both ways.
We agree!
Now, have you ever had a man read aloud to you from The WSJ, or are you fooling, making a point? I'd much rather read Keats or Lord Byron aloud to a lover, hopefully with her in my arms. Sorry.......drifted off for a moment.
Yes, a partner who engages fully in life, seems to be the answer, regardless of age. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/22/2009 10:47:06 AM | Oh...do they? Not so I have noticed!
The younger guys that come after me state that girls their own age are too controlling, and only interested in their nails, spray tans, boob jobs and hair extensions...yada yada yada...
Wheresas mature women have great coversation, are generally happy with themselves, have life experience and by far the main attraction is confidence.
Perhaps an older guys likes a younger girl as he is able to dazzle them with cash and control them! She is younger and inexperienced in men and relationships so never challenges his way...and he can be the boss. Throws her presents to keep her sweet as well. Dont fool yourself as to the reasons she may be interested in you.
I personally do not find older guys attractive...most look and act old and not many take pride in their appearence...not all, but most...and stamina comes into it...
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/23/2009 12:57:09 PM |
Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Older un-fit men chase 25 year olds. I don't know how many actually catch them, but they try!! Likewise? Many older women are card-carrying-members of Cougars-R-Us. Personally? I just figure that the men looking for younger women simply aren't the men for me. It's not personal, it's preference. JMO  | |
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teslin
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Joined: 9/12/2009
Msg: 389 | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 9/23/2009 4:13:19 PM | Just to get back into it let me say that I have never chased a much younger woman or plied one with cash, gifts ect. I live in the first "playground of the rich" there is a lot of money here and a lot of gold diggers always has been. If I am jaded by it, oh well.
My point wasn't to put older women down but that the desires expressed in a lot of profiles are of money it seems to me. I am an older fit guy I ride my bicycles and roller-skate and surf, I don't dance much. Now I don't have any desire for a woman under ten years younger than me (42) and my profile gets viewed at least ten or twenty times a week but rarely does anything come of it because? I don't have money to burn, my interests aren't fine dining and exotic travel, theater and other expensive pursuits? These are women that frequently share interests like cycling or skating or classic films, so what is it if not the dough? So what if some guy sports young'un I see it too often to get mad about he's paying she's playing . It's all prostitution in the end, the one who wants the other one more pays. And any woman who thinks a much younger guy is into them for anything other than easy Pu$$y is crazy, I was young once too.
I would love to have another PARTNER who is down to earth and I keep on waiting and I hope she is in my generation, because 25 year olds are a pain to train. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 10/5/2009 7:58:00 AM | You are 57 and still do not want to accept the fact about men. And you sound like a teenager: "Older men.......chasing 25 year olds???What is with that?" That is the fact of life. A 60 year old man once told me that teenage girls are EVERY man's fantasy. And the younger guys from the gym that are " into you", they want you for some reasons. But you can not be their fantasy. Now, you are looking for a PERFECT man. And such men of your age are looking for the most beautiful girl. I watched a show where a pretty 22 year old girl was marrying an ugly, overweight but wealthy 66 year old man. So, because there are girls interested in much older men, such men will try to get lucky.
Now, try to think clearly. Why there should be reasonably presentable, honest, athletic older men out there who have bigger hearts than ego and still available????Just for you???? You sound not just immature but very unreasonable. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 10/5/2009 3:15:28 PM | I can see why some older men shun older fit women and chase younger women, as there are some very beautiful women out there [not saying they are successful]. What I don't understand is what these [few] younger women see in some older men, unless they are George Clooney look alike. I certainly don't think it is the older men's physical physiques and dynamic personalities that draws these younger women to the older men. From some of the male posts and profiles I have read there are some pretty sour personalities portrayed towards women in general, surely that doesn't just show up in an age related situation... That is pretty selected if it is... I do think that some [not all] of the younger women date the men for financial reasons, and maybe because they lacked a father figure in their lives.
As an older semi-fit woman myself, I wonder why younger males are attracted and in the past have contacted me (before I changed my age parameters). Many of the responses posted have mentioned that younger guys only use the older women for sexual enjoyment. On all the posts I have read it states that men have to be physically attracted to women before they will approach them. My thoughts are would I rather have them physically attracted to me and be interested in me sexually, or would I rather have someone use me for financial gains… Tough One!!!
It’s actually a mute point, as I am not interested in younger men, or older men who pursue and are interested in younger women. Regardless, I just hope there are some physically fit and healthy men, with great personalities that are around my age still interested and attracted to women their own/my age…
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 10/6/2009 3:10:53 PM | My experiences dating "older, fit women" even when I was younger is that they tend to be full of themselves a little too much. By that I mean they think because of their great fitness that they deserve better, richer, flashier all the time -- and rarely settle for anyone who actually loves them. The exceptions tend to be the older women who have gone through a life change and decided love and respect is more important in their life then adventure, thrill, or drama. The others are just not looking for a male companion but more of the next guy to have a fling with.
As to older men dating younger women -- in this city you very very very rarely see that. But there are a lot of cougars that chase the navy boys around every summer along with their search for the university boys in the bars.
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 10/6/2009 6:41:10 PM | I'm 54 and willing to date from younger to some older than myself, I belong to this and a couple other sites and it seems the age thing is not just male, there are many women my age that will not consider dating a guy unless he is 5 to 10 years younger sometimes more.
It just seems we all both men and women have issues with age but I think the biggest issue we all have and I'm guilty too is it is so easy online to just dismiss someone who writes and say they do not meet some criteria we have and that criteria seems to change. Different sites can match someone 100% by all the tests and height, weight, body type, likes and dislikes and I can write and the response back is we just are not a good match. So it seems we all have changing criteria from day to day. But myself I have dated 55 and 56 year olds and women in their thirties. Actually it is easier to get a date with a woman in her thirties than a woman in her 50's. We all have to loosen up a little and give each other a chance instead of judging and tossing the chance out the window. | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:09:00 PM | i find it's very easy to get a date,
with men of all ages...
the tricky thing is getting a date with someone you really fancy...
no matter your criteria...
whether it be stringent or lackadaisical?
if...when you meet there is no physical attraction,
it can be a pleasant? way to pass the time...
or a complete farce... | |
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| Older fit men shunning older fit women and chasing 25 year olds??? What's with that?
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:27:03 PM | Older men who are fit make me more nervous than other men. You can never tell what they really want. The double-standard is in full play with this problem. No matter how far the women's movement has come, women are still viewed as old while older men are viewed as distinguished. They look at younger women because they know it's possible to still get one. While older women rarely get a younger man for anything more than just a sexual fling.
Wow I have to disagree with you on that. Personally I have always found older women easier company. I always used to think older intelligent and sensual women were far better catches even when I was in my 20s. Had a few close lady friends at that time who were in their late 40s and 50s. I used to think Germaine Greer was sexy :-) but them maybe I am a odd ball. Not the exception though as I know other guys who have lived the same kind of life and seem happier for it. Younger women are all lies, hate, and drama. Not worth the grief.
Older women are better choices because they are more content with who they are as they get up past 35-40, and even more so in the 50 range. You can actually be a friend with them and not worry (most times) about foolish hidden agendas. The older women who are black widows tend to be a little more obvious about their intentions -- so it is easier to steer away from them. Older women also seem to appreciate a man who can curl their toes and make them purr a lot more honestly than the young women ever do. There is certainly a lack of spiritual connection amongst the young ( no vampire movies and wicca is not a spiritual connection -- sorry 20 somethings). The young ones always have some stupid idealogy on relationships according to what Cosmo or Playgirl says that month -- which makes them hopeless in my eyes. If there was more maturity then the age difference would not matter, but I have very very rarely found any.
BTW The "older men viewed as distinguished" is more a woman's point of view and belief. Men rarely see each other that way. A man who has lived a long time and has sound wisdom to deal with his experiences is more distinguished then some money grubbing hawk or power crazed psycopath that wants women and everyone else to kiss his rear. That kind of person is only "a man" in the eyes of foolish women.
the tricky thing is getting a date with someone you really fancy...
Yes but what does an older woman fancy? Some want a sensual man to make up for years of lousy days in the bedroom. Some want a rich man to shower them with gifts and show them the world. Some just want a man to bring them breakfast. It is communicating that which complicates an older womans search -- IMHO.
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