Long Term Relationship - What Time Length Defines It? Free Dating, Singles and Personals

Long Term Relationship - What Time Length Defines It? Posted: 6/9/2009 5:10:46 PM
What I am asking is what YOU personally consider to be a long term relationship i.e. is it 3 years, 5 years, 10 years and so on. It matters not whether you are married, living common-law, widowed or dating rather what length of time or duration constitutes "long term" in your world. Tinkerbellcgy, I think it is funny that we all seem to have a different attitude about how to define this. There are other threads that compare dating, long term, friends, etc. and why we select a given label on our profile. I chose long term on my profile. My boyfriend chose dating, but went on within the body of his profile to say he was open to the possibility of short term or long term romance. My idea of long term is being in a relationship with someone whose goal is to be with me for a lifetime. I am looking to find that person whose hand I can hold when one of us takes our last breath. There is a poem which is anonymous that talks about friends coming into our lives for a reason, for a season or a lifetime. This poem to me can so easily be modified and applied to relationships between men and women. Some relationships are for a reason, and my be over in months. Some relationships are for a season and my last years. Other relationships may last a lifetime. My goal for relationship is to find my love of a lifetime. You don't get to a lifetime relationship any way other than living your life one day at a time. I am in a relationship right now with a man that I have been dating for four months right now. Four months is just a blip in time. I have been around him long enough to know that we are a really good fit, and I am comfortable with him. Even at four short months I can see him as someone I could spend a lifetime loving. I don't choose to think that I am in anything other than a long term relationship with him right now. I treat him in a loving manner. I am considerate, caring, giving, generous, playful. We are lovers and friends. Now if this relationship ends before a lifetime, in retrospect I will label it accordingingly. However, right now I am looking longterm. There are no endpoints, no ultimatums, no specific plans made to move in together, to get married, to change anything from the way we are doing things right at the moment. If we are going to be together "forever" there is no rush to "do" anything. We are taking it one day at a time an done moment at a time. We are treating each other with love and respect. As long as we continue to treat each other this way I see it just getting better and better. My point is you don't have to have already "lived" in a relationship long term, to "feel" like you are in a long term relationship. When it is over, you can look back on the relationship and label it. When you are living the relationship, the whole attitude with which you approach your partner colors it. I choose to live my life like we are in a long term relationship, even though by the calender it has not "earned" the title. Trusting that he is going to be around forever, changes the way I treat him. I don't worry about it. I give him my best. If by my attitude I felt that he would on the way out the door any time now, I don't think I would give as much of myself, as freely, and without reservation. So my real definition of the length of time for a long term relationship is, at whatever point in your heart you reach that feeling that you would be happy to be with that person for the rest of your life. Once you reach that point in your heart, the task then becomes treating them that way, and living it.