| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 12:24:57 PM |
women only please
Tsk tsk OP...bad form to be breaking the rules like that. Polarized threads are a no-no 'round these parts.
context: you are in a monogamous relationship
situation-you and your boyfriend have plans for the evening(dancing, theatre, concert, sporting event, whatever)
will you and him have sexual relations BEFORE you go out for the evening or when you RETURN
who will initiate the sex: him OR you?
Generally speaking I'll have sex after the evening has drawn down. We went wherever, and had a great time, went back home and now we may or may not have sex. Again, generally speaking she will be the leader and initiate. Saves me the hassle of hearing "That's all you want me for is the sex!" later on. At least if she initiates, then that's one less thing I'll have to listen to.
One time, and one notable time, I did the instigating and it was before AND after the evening. We had a good time, but apparently orgasms caused her to lose her coordination and she had a b!tch of a time applying her makeup for the night out. LOL. So even though we did it before the night and after, we agreed that if we were doing the town that we'd behave ourselves until after the night was over. She claimed that she didn't wanna feel like Ronald McDonald with her makeup application if we did it beforehand.
Fair enough. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 12:28:08 PM |
will you and him have sexual relations BEFORE you go out for the evening or when you RETURN
Before and After if time permits.
As for who initiates it........who cares as long as we are having sex.
You did say boyfriend, not husband. I think if you have a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, you don't need to do so much planning. I am assuming of course that if you have plans for the evening, you are alone, so planning isn't important.......just do it. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 12:44:33 PM |
will you and him have sexual relations BEFORE you go out for the evening or when you RETURN
who will initiate the sex: him OR you?
You make it sound like it's a transaction that you expect.
I have it when I feel like it.
If he's in my good books and he's looking good to me then I'll jump him.
If he's pissed me off I won't.
And if I did it would definitely be AFTER going out.
I'm not getting ready twice and good sex will tire me out.
OT: Sometimes it's fun to tease each other like crazy while you're getting ready to go out... almost to the point of release... but then stopping to keep the buzz going all night. That's when some of the best f*cktackles happen... when the passion has been building for freakin' hours... you both know it's gonna happen... but you don't know exactly when. Hell, you might not even make it to the car at the end of the evening!
Exactly! | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 12:45:46 PM | | If I have it before, I'm not going to want to go out afterwards. If we go out, after all that dancing, I'm not going to want to have it after. I'm going to want to shower and sleep. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 2:45:14 PM | Well, I've dated single moms who had 3-4 kids. And basically little to no time for themselves.
She still had to plan HER time with you in between her kids - so yes she "planned". You don't have to, but she does, whether it's sex or not.
It's when that's all it ever is. Your "weekly sex". At that point... the passion dies, and it just becomes mechanical.
Agreed, but when you don't have time for anything else but a quickie, shouldn't you be planning some extensive time with each other to keep that passion alive? Not so easy to have an extensive evening when the kids are home and you are overworked and overtired. So you plan it.
It's different for single or childless folks.
Remember the world we live in. Still not enough work/life balance around.
In a great relationship, I think both initiate. However other folks who either have a more dominant or submissive side may say differently.
Many single childless people (I've found men to be more unprepared) don't really understand how much having a family can change things. Since I've lived with families most of my adult life, I'm well aware of the sacrifices and changes that come along with a family.
Heck, I've dated men who are recently divorced and they all say that they can't believe the extra time they now have! | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 2:57:08 PM | WTF??!!
I don't plan these things!
Half the fun is the spontaneity~!
Sounds like someone needs to take a big boy pill!
WTF??!! Geez! | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 5:39:13 PM | Question: before or after, when to do it?
Answer; surprise him with a Magic 8 Ball (make sure to ask twice!) | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 7:37:43 PM | hmmmm......not sure why "planned" sex is getting a bad rap ?!?
I love whispering in my man's ear as I'm walking out the door for work...
"I plan on fuking you silly tonight"
gives us all day to think about it......and get quite worked up for it!
as for doing it "Before" or "After" going out......
totally depends on the moment!
A nice intense quickie before is good......and then some long drawn out hot monkey sex afterwards is better because of it! | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 8:58:56 PM | | Well it depends if I feel like it is going to be a long night and I am feeling amorous than I will initiate before. If it is going to be a few hours and I think we will have a lot of fun and the desert will be the topping of a great evening then I will wait. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 9:12:23 PM |
who the hell knows, it always depends on the situation. you cant plan these things!! RAIN
Exactly! Before, after, or even both before and after.....it all depends. Except, you CAN plan these things if you're that sort, but that's no fun. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 9:37:18 PM | | I choose to post here just to be a rebel. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 10:09:47 PM | | I will initiate the sex when we return home for the nite! | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/9/2009 10:24:17 PM | Before, during and after. Does it matter who initiates it??? Bugga, I keep initiating sex, does that make me wrong??? As for planning sex.... absolutely.... if he's taking me out, or coming over for a visit... trust me, I've planned sex..
And if the short person is around, thats what closed doors are for and why stereos have volume, and thats why they are called quickies.  | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/10/2009 8:26:40 AM | Most likely after.
I spent a lot of time getting ready and I don't want to get messed up.
Actually, the highest probability is that I'll be tired and he'll have to just relax and cuddle up until morning.
If he's in the bed in the morning...he better look out!
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| women only please
Posted: 6/10/2009 8:51:06 AM | | It's against POF rules to only 'allow' one gender to reply to posts. This thread will surely be deleted... | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/10/2009 9:03:21 AM | | Both... and... uhm... a quickie in the elevator, janitor closet or whatever at the event/venue. | |
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| women only please
Posted: 6/11/2009 6:49:33 AM | | I SAY BOTH IT DONT MATTER WHO STARTS IT AS LONG AS WE BOTH FINISH ITS ALLL GOOD IN MY BOOK | |
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