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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?      Home login  
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 Sweetbabeblues
Joined: 4/23/2008
Msg: 26
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?Page 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Doesn't matter.... Either way except it and move on....

Plenty more fish in the sea who might like you just the way you are....

 eschec mat
Joined: 3/3/2009
Msg: 27
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 9:58:51 AM
If I get to know someone, I feel that they become more or less attractive. I stop seeing the outsides and see the insides of a person. One of the good things about these threads, you can see how people are. So I don't see as it making a bit of difference because how you look to someone is personality and physical attributes. You just move on and realize they weren't the one for you.
 celts123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 28
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 10:48:34 AM
Doesn't matter to me. The thing about you that one person doesn't like could be the same thing that another person likes about you. Whether it's a physical or personality trait.
 Bry-Fidelity
Joined: 9/11/2007
Msg: 29
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 11:12:45 AM
Thanks for the variety of responses everybody! They are well thought out and honest! I just want to clarify that I meant for this post to be topical and I didn't mean to come off like a self pity troll! :) I think my mistake was giving to much perspective of my own to lead into the conversation but I guess it's human nature to put a piece of yourself into whatever you write! Thanks for any answer regardless whether they were answering the original question or trying to knock some sense into me! lol Very insightful! Peace!
 uknowmenot
Joined: 6/4/2009
Msg: 30
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 12:49:39 PM
My personality.
 Rogue Saint
Joined: 4/26/2009
Msg: 31
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 2:09:07 PM
What's the difference? Rejection hurts no matter how you slice it. That long walk back across the dance floor alone doesn't sting any more or less than not being chosen at dodge ball. Some things can be autopsied to death (pardon the pun). Heal thyself and move forward.
 BigDaddyJinx
Joined: 11/4/2006
Msg: 32
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 2:56:10 PM

What type of rejection is harder for you guys: Looks or Personality! Peace!

OP -- Like Rock said, rejection is rejection. Doesn't matter what flavor it is, or what form it takes...rejection is rejection. It means they didn't want you.

But to answer your question...for me, I'd be devastated if I was rejected for personality reasons. I mean, straight up, seriously down in the dumps, hardcore devastated.

I feel my personality defines me in every way. Looks will come and go, but an interesting (if not acidic) personality will go a long way. If I was told I was good looking or desirable but I had the personality of wet grass or a bag of soup...I'd be choked. I'd probably wanna hurl myself out the nearest window or play in traffic during rush hour. The other way around, great personality but fugly as all given Hell...I couldn't care less. At least I know my personality is still intact.

I pride myself on being the "anti-norm" and the "anti-status quo". If I was given the brush off because she said I had no personality, I'd be crushed. I worked long and hard to nurture and hone my personality...to find that this one or that one sees it as limp or lifeless...man I don't think I could cope with that.

So there's my answer to your question. Have fun with it.
 steve217
Joined: 3/1/2009
Msg: 33
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:01:16 PM
I don't think either would make anyone feel good.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 34
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:01:32 PM
Rejected for my personality would bother me more. I am sort of used to being rejected for my looks, as I have heard 50 percent of the men I have met in the last 10 years tell me that I have a great personality but they wish that I had a different body and face.
 chance747
Joined: 1/24/2009
Msg: 35
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:07:47 PM
ones looks are constantly changing, so the guy who goes only by the girls body or good looks, may be in for a surprise, as his looks also fade, mother nature is good, but father time will have his turn, as for the personality, this is who you've become, its kind of ironic, a person has to practice being rude, or mean, for that to become a part of them, and so many do, why not practice, being merciful, loving, devoted, any man can make love to a womans body, but a real man, makes love to her soul.......savanah
 Janet4ever
Joined: 4/14/2008
Msg: 36
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:15:50 PM
I'm not sure how you would know exactly why someone was rejecting you... unless they specifically said so (isn't that RARE?)

If someone insulted your looks that says more about their piss-poor personality than anything else.
 ImAHotMess
Joined: 7/11/2008
Msg: 37
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:21:13 PM
I do not even use on line as a judgement for personality any more; I have learned! MOST (not all) but most that I have encountered are simply NOT the same as they make themselves appear to be on here. Everyting from fake profiles, to old photos, etc. There is a combination of things I look for in a person; and honesty has to be the root of all of it. Sure, we are attracted to a certain "tpye". Like I even say in my profile, there is a number of attributes I am looking for. For instance, I do not care how "hot" someone is, if they are an ***hole, I am not interested. I do not care how NICE someone is, if I am not physically attracted to them, I am still not interested. I accept my looks and feel I take damn good care of myself for the age of 39. I also accept and am proud that I pay my own bills, work, have a car and a valid drivers lisence and I am honest. Finding and meeting someone with the same ways I think, and the same (or close to it) sucess in life is very important. If someone is going to reject me, I do not give a rats ass. It probably means I do not need them anyway. I may not stop caring about someone, if they made a difference in my life, but I need to take care of me. I do not find looks issues to be vain at all. We are human. I am a visual person. I am very sexual. I also tend to think more like a man. Therefore, I know what I want. :)
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 38
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:35:06 PM
Looks! Alot of people like my personality, saying I am a likeable person. Yet, most would never date me cause I don't look like a raging beauty.

Hey-those super models are super high maintenance anyway!
 emlamNsea
Joined: 4/19/2009
Msg: 39
All....
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:36:31 PM

I don't feel that either is better or worse.

I accept that my looks are not going to be something that all people find attractive.

I accept that my personality is not going to be something that all people find attractive.

I am much more willing to change my looks, albeit not necessary as a way to "get" someone. However, in a relationship, I have shaved or grown hair because my partner had a preference. I have colored my hair, dressed up in clothes that are not in my everyday wear apparel, and really so many more small and fun things to make my partner say, "wow!"

I can't change my personality. I am who I am. I don't take it personally if someone rejects me for it because it's not something I'm willing or able to change. I would much rather someone reject me straight out for a personality clash than to continue getting to know me thinking they can change me in some way. "Lukewarm acceptance is more bewildering than outright rejection."


...very well said.

I don't suppose you are ok with the fact that I don't look like David Beckham, or is that an issue for you?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 40
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:36:55 PM

I pride myself on being the "anti-norm" and the "anti-status quo". If I was given the brush off because she said I had no personality, I'd be crushed. I worked long and hard to nurture and hone my personality...to find that this one or that one sees it as limp or lifeless...man I don't think I could cope with that.


It goes without saying that you have a personality that's all your own. I don't think it would be a question of someone saying you don't. I can see, however, that there would be some who would reject you because they couldn't handle the straight forward, shoot from the hip type of personality you have. There's a difference between rejecting you for having no personality or a perosnality that one might not appreciate.
 Blk_Archangel7
Joined: 12/21/2007
Msg: 41
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:39:26 PM
exactly rawfish,
you nailed it on the head. There is no difference it is because the person is not interested. If they were interested they would make time to talk to you and like you for YOU :-p. Just look for people that would care about you. Don't settle for less.
 SueCat51
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 42
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:42:18 PM
OP - let's face it, rejection pure sucks. If I'm rejected for whatever reason, it isn't going to ruin my day. I'd rather be out of the Rejector's life, than to be in their life under false pretenses.
 bklynrebel
Joined: 11/30/2008
Msg: 43
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:42:44 PM
I get rejected because I'm too good looking, the men can't handle it.
 Indiana Rose
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 44
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Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/12/2009 3:45:22 PM
It is not necessarily a pleasant experience, but there will be times in our lives when we come across people who do not like us. As we know, like attracts like, so usually when they don’t like us it is because they are not like us. Rather than taking it personally, we can let them be who they are, accepting that each of us is allowed to have different perspectives and opinions.

When we give others that freedom, we claim it for ourselves as well, releasing ourselves from the need for their approval so we can devote our energy toward more rewarding pursuits.

While approval from others is a nice feeling, when we come to depend on it we may lose our way on our own path. There are those who will not like us no matter what we do, but that doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with us.

Each of us has our own filters built from our experiences over time. They may see in us something that is merely a projection of their understanding, but we have no control over the interpretations of others.

The best we can do is to hope that the role we play in the script of their lives is helpful to them, and follow our own inner guidance with integrity

As we reap the benefits of walking our perfect paths, we grow to appreciate the feeling of fully being ourselves. The need to have everyone like us will be replaced by the exhilaration of discovering that we are attracting like-minded individuals into our lives—people who like us because they understand and appreciate the truth of who we are. We free ourselves from trying to twist into shapes that will fit the spaces provided by others’ limited understanding and gain a new sense of freedom, allowing us to expand into becoming exactly who we’re meant to be. And in doing what we know to be right for us, we show others that they can do it too.
 ~Hello~
Joined: 7/30/2008
Msg: 45
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/14/2009 3:51:14 AM

I get rejected because I'm too good looking, the men can't handle it.


I'm with ya bklynrebel!! .. I've never been so hot in my life!!! lol

Flash! lol

Rejection?? nah .. that's just someone doing you the favour of leaving you so you'll be Free for the Right one. ;)

OT - if someone rejects me for my looks (and I'm sure they have) .. they tell me more about themselves than anything .. and I am grateful for not wasting time in the shallow end of the pool. If someone rejects me for my personality - so long as I am genuine and true to myself I'm ok with that too. I Like 'who' I am - so you don't have to.
 spicynicegirl
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 46
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 6/14/2009 4:00:29 AM
I really hate questions like this......................men love my personality but I've been rejected for my "looks" before.

One guy actually told me I wasn't his "type". I believe he was looking for a Barbie. I don't look like the image they have in their little minds. I'm talking about on here because in the real world they wouldn't tell you that stuff.
 HazelRose
Joined: 6/15/2009
Msg: 47
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 8/10/2009 4:23:31 AM
Looks are all on the eye of the beholder, so personality would be worse. You can fix ugly,but not personality for too long.
 Drusurfer06
Joined: 8/11/2009
Msg: 48
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 9/21/2009 11:58:16 AM
I would have to say personality.
 sandman51
Joined: 2/29/2008
Msg: 49
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 9/21/2009 12:13:15 PM

I'm not sure how you would know exactly why someone was rejecting you... unless they specifically said so (isn't that RARE?)


Yes it is rare and total honesty about why they're rejecting you is even more rare. They may say be hiding the true reason of their lack of desire for you .


If someone insulted your looks that says more about their piss-poor personality than anything else.


Yes it does. There is still such a thing as decorum even in the dating world.
 PiggyT
Joined: 9/14/2009
Msg: 50
Is it worse to get rejected for your looks or your personality?
Posted: 9/21/2009 12:16:32 PM
I prefer to be rejected because of my tiny willie....

this is a silly thread, it deserves a silly answer.

Silly Willie
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