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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:28:25 PM | ...
well....i would like to remain modest if i could.
but we all have stressfull moments. hee hee.
i am a decent person. a country person in the city kind of person. ...kinda dumb...kinda smart. distant ...intimating . i am not easy to get along with you absolutely need one or the other. i tend to be melodramatic and ecstatic by turn.
and neither of those persons are good at aimlessness...unless its my depressing guy...but he just aims at resting and brooding...good for writing it is. how is that for you...? *winks* | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:32:19 PM | | lol a name caller to boot. You must be a real keeper. Sorry there guy but you just made a fool out of yourself. Did i hit a nerve. Read my post above yours. Do you see yourself there? I didn't think so. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:37:54 PM | gentle whisper
If any one defines you as a decent woman considering the sexist and bigoted attitude you have towards men, there is seriously some thing wrong.  | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:44:30 PM | I asked you a question oOonickoOo. How come you can't answer it?
I will ask again..... do you see yourself in the post above your sweet kind post to me?
you just want to rant and belittle me and you are doing a find job of making an arse out of yourself, but that is your goal in life right? | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:53:30 PM | Someone who has manors
is not stuck on himself
does not brag about himself or his possessions
is not mean or rude
can carry a normal conversation without every other word being the f word
Is interested in his date not just himself or the other women around him
Is honest about his life
treats children, women, elderly, with respect
does not make fun of people
can control his temper and is not mad at the world or blaming others for his temper
does not believe in hitting or man handling a women.
does not drive like a maniac or yell obscenities at other drivers.
does not put people down because of race, religion, disabilities, lack of money, or things, or weight/looks, education.
can smile and laugh at himself and with others and is not uptight and rigid.
does kind acts and helps others when he can.
Now this list is just a basic no frills kind of guy, But one worth finding and keeping.
How many guys can say they are like this? How many women have met alot of guys like this? If so how come you are not with him?
Oh I absolutely agree with you, and I PREFER the "basic no frills kind of guy". But in addition to this basic structure of a decent human being, I have to have that special spark we generally refer to as love.
And it's not like they are all that rare...but the fact remains that a lot of them have partners...WOMEN who are decent human beings. With the unpartnered ones, it's still a matter of finding chemistry and shared values and goals. And why am I not with any of these fine men I've met? Well, the most important one died. Since then it's a matter of finding a decent unpartnered guy in my age range,with whom I have a sustainable chemistry. I notice you didn't mention income or finances, and financial ethics. Men piss and moan about "gold diggers", but there is a male counterpart. I don't care how much money he does or doesn't have, but I want a financially ethical man. That's a man who meets his bills and obligations FIRST, and doesn't try to sponge off girlfriends, parents, friends, room mates... And I'm finding out by some recent occurrences among friends, that just because a man has employment doesn't guarantee that he's not a parasite.
Cindy O
Edit to add
I in no way believe that the majority of men are problematic and/or abusive. But I think "decent' ought to mean a little more than " not abusive, incarcerated or indigent". | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:55:48 PM | gentle_whisper: Cindy you know what I am saying your going out there to an extreme. Here's my definition of a decent guy.
Someone who has manors
So you want a really rich guy!!!
Manor: the mansion of a lord or wealthy person; the landed estate of a lord (including the house on it)
is not stuck on himself
does not brag about himself or his possessions
is not mean or rude
can carry a normal conversation without every other word being the f word
Is interested in his date not just himself or the other women around him
Is honest about his life
treats children, women, elderly, with respect
does not make fun of people
can control his temper and is not mad at the world or blaming others for his temper
does not believe in hitting or man handling a women.
does not drive like a maniac or yell obscenities at other drivers.
does not put people down because of race, religion, disabilities, lack of money, or things, or weight/looks, education.
can smile and laugh at himself and with others and is not uptight and rigid.
does kind acts and helps others when he can.
Now this list is just a basic no frills kind of guy, But one worth finding and keeping.
How many guys can say they are like this? How many women have met alot of guys like this? If so how come you are not with him?
OK, now that we have your wish list, can you honestly say you're all of the above yourself? | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 5:32:31 PM | I asked you a question oOonickoOo. How come you can't answer it?
Sure
Someone who has manors
Yep but only to those who don't have idiotic views about men
is not stuck on himself
Meaning? Stuck up? Far from it
does not brag about himself or his possessions
No, I am not a narcissist. I honestly never ever brag about anything.
is not mean or rude
Definately not, UNLESS people are mean and rude to me or towards men in general.
can carry a normal conversation without every other word being the f word
I swear some times, I think most people do. But nope, I can have a conversation without using it
Is interested in his date not just himself or the other women around him
I don't think a man in his right mind would be dating some one whom he was not interested in. There wouldn't be a date to begin with.
But that being said, the part where you say that a person just being interested about themselves, that can be said about the women who expect men to pay for everything.
Is honest about his life
Look at my profile. Do I appear honest and upfront to you?
treats children, women, elderly, with respect
Yep, sure do. But as I said, if some one is rude to me or my gender, I will be rude back.
does not make fun of people
I only make fun of people who do the same to me or my gender or the women who have such ridiculous views about men such as your self.
can control his temper and is not mad at the world or blaming others for his temper
I mostly keep my cool. It takes alot to put me over the edge.
does not believe in hitting or man handling a women.
I would never punch a woman or strike a woman first!, however if a woman punched me or attempted to phyically abuse me in any way, I would slap her back.
Also, if a woman seemed life threatening such as attacking a man with a knife and he was cornered, what is a man supposed to do? I would love to know your answer!
does not drive like a maniac or yell obscenities at other drivers.
Only an idiot does that and fortunately only a minority of both genders do it
does not put people down because of race, religion, disabilities, lack of money, or things, or weight/looks, education.
I don't but when it comes to religion, I love controversy. But I don;t intend to put people down because of their beliefs, I just like to challenge.
can smile and laugh at himself and with others and is not uptight and rigid.
I do all the time
does kind acts and helps others when he can.
I am willing to help others out, even when I don't have much money to spare my self
Happy?  | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 5:33:22 PM | yes hair I can say that I am those things myself. I am far from perfect or a model but i do have the qualities I would like in a mate as well. he does not have to be rich, or drop dead gorgeous just be the things I mentioned and have the chemistry that we all look for in a mate. Chemistry is hard to define. Its magic, it could be how someone laughs or smiles, or talks, or kisses, or any number of things. But without the basic list above none of the magic is going to happen.
I am not materialistic and don't care about posessions or money, but i do care about how a person takes care of their money buy paying bills etc. Like Cindy mentioned.
I care about whats in a persons mind and heart. What makes them special and worth being with. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 6:11:30 PM | you see o0onicko0o you made excuses for your rude behavior in almost every sentance saying if someone is mean to me I will be mean back. Making excuses for your behavior. Thats what an abuser does. An abuser says you made me mad so i had to do xyz. It also has to do with your age and attitude. You still have alot to learn about life.
I am not bashing men as a gender. I am saddened and concerned with the way men abuse women and wonder why women are afraid and not sure about dating, meeting people. That so many people deny that abuse is serious and it happens more than anyone realizes. Look at the news today about too much violence towards women and children on tv.
Do you really think women want to hate men? Be real. We want to fall in love and be happy and not be abused or raped or killed. We want the dream life of growing old with our mate. We don't want to be afraid of our mate. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 6:52:35 PM | It also has to do with your age and attitude.
Geez look at your attitude, you are a raven misandrist bigot
You still have a lot to learn about life
ROFL
Can anyone see the extreme irony in this?
If you think the majority of the male gender is evil, you seriously have a lot to learn about life.
I am not bashing men as a gender
But then you say things like this
I respect any man who will admit that a majority of men can and are abusive, and have issues they probabley will never get help for
….
Look at the news today about too much violence towards women and children on tv.
What does this tell you?
Where is the concern about male domestic violence victims? Where are the domestic violence campaign commercials that mention men?
When you think about it, men may suffer more (not in all circumstances) than women as there is far less support or no support for male victims. There is no big concern for it. Male victims mostly have to deal with it alone.
Research this link carefully instead of listening to feminist hogwash
http://www.mediaradar.org/research.php#waj | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/28/2009 7:31:04 PM | nick have I disrespected you once? Your anger toward me is not healthy or productive. You are missing the whole point. It saddens me that you refuse to see that I am not out to destroy the male race. I want humans be it male or female to own up to their issues.
Like some women can be nags, and talk about a subject to death where a man just wants to drop it and not talk. Some women are very superficial and only care about a mans money. Some women have to have fancy cars, houses, jewelry or they will dump the guy. Some women make fun of guys anatomy and other things like going bald or their hairy body. Women can be cruel too. Don't you think I know that?
I have been around 55 yrs. Have 2 sons 36 and 37 and 3 grandsons 14, 12, and 1. Do you think I hate them? They are my life. I would give my life for them. And they are all male. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 6:08:49 AM |
And btw lime your statistics are just the same thing as mine. Taken off the net. So why say mine are false and yours are true?
Because the ones I presented are from actual studies conducted by both the Canadian and U.S. governments. I have provided links to those studies so that you can see the numbers for yourself.
You, on the other hand have provided nothing of the sort. Just hot air. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 6:50:57 AM | bonnie said
"I care about whats in a persons mind and heart. '
bello said
Balony!!!!
Bello since your the expert and know how I think or feel and I am full of balony. Please explain why you know this without a doubt. Have we met? I don't think so. So explain how you can write all those things saying I am full of balony? When your profile has this at the end of it?
from bellos profile
P.S. Be the best you can be, beleive in yourself, and live everyday to the fullest, help others when they need help, be cool to others and treat them the way you yourself wish to be treated, spread more love, and always remember, smile!!... you never know how much you can lift up a person with just a smile!!
You talk the talk but don't walt the walk. I am not putting down all men. I am tired of abusive men getting away with what they do. Seeing hearing these very frightened women with little children living in fear and no where to turn. I am tired of people saying it does not happen. I am tied of people attacking someone who is speaking out for them. I am tired of hearing the same ole excuses. Maybe you want to live in your little comfortable happy land, but I want to see things improve for everyone.
I have had meetings with the human rights counselman and other officials who are working hard to change the laws to make violence against women a hate crime. You may say oh foul us men get abused too. Well then fight for your rights to get abuse agains men a hate crime. If you don't fight for something you will fall for anything.
I am going to be in touch with the human rights counselman and ask him to give me the statistics so you can see what I mean. Its not just in this country its around the world. Its a serious imbalance. One where very few have the guts to talk about or fight for.
I am not a bigot. I am bringing awareness to people who have blinders on and only want to see and hear what they want to.
BTW do you see tv or movies depicting men being abused by women all the time?
If men really want to love women then try to understand what they go through and how they are treated. Show compassion instead of sarcastic, mean spiritied inconsiderate babble.
I have met men who have been abused and show them the same compassion I would show anyone. But the odds of there being an epidemic of battered men going around with black eys, broken noses, and living in battered shelters are not something I see on a daily basis. Nor do I see men lose a baby because of being beat so bad.
I think I am working for a good cause. I would do it even if I was a man. Somethings are just as obvious as the nose on your face and can't be ignored.
Take care | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 7:56:07 AM | We have an old saying in journalism...75 per cent of statistics are invented.
That said, having covered courts for many years as a journalist, I saw very few (if any) domestic violence cases come through. Most were drinking-related, petty thefts, occasional bigger cases (including an attempted murder and a first degree murder). The perpetrators, as I recalled, were right down the middle in terms of the split of genders.
I would point out, that two of the most horrific cases of violence against women in Canada that I recall had women perpetrators either actively involved or even "masterminds" of them. I'm thinking, of course, of such cases the Rena Virk murder, the French/Mahaffy murders and the stabbing of a 14-year-old girl. In the last, a boy did the stabbing, but urged on by his girlfriend who viewed the victim as a "rival."
When it comes to violence, let's face it, we're all capable of it whether one is male or female. The only differences might be the triggers or the motives. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 8:06:04 AM |
We have an old saying in journalism...75 per cent of statistics are invented.
an even older, and better, commentary(attributed to both Francis Bacon and Mark Twain)
"There are 3 kinds of lies-lies, damned lies, and statistics."
While I absolutely applaud all those good people who work towards resolving domestic violence,relationship violence and child abuse, I have to question whether an online dating site is a good place to park one's soapbox on these matters. Or whether someone who is quite convinced that the majority of men are unrepentant abusers, should be looking to date. Doesn't it say something in the Bible about removing the beam from YOUR OWN EYE, before you attempt to remove a speck from someone else's eye?
Just my dollar-two-ninetyeight opinion.
Cindy O | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 10:51:17 AM | "...I have had meetings with the human rights counselman and other officials who are working hard to change the laws to make violence against women a hate crime. You may say oh foul us men get abused too. Well then fight for your rights to get abuse agains men a hate crime. If you don't fight for something you will fall for anything. .."
my dear gentle whisper.
these cries we hear are not to benefit law.
abuse is a human conduct. it is neglect of respects and that include barrier of meeting one on one.
rather than yelling fire from behind the offices of police and law to gain attention of a human relations counsel which are not fully informed of human respects...look to see where disrespects of relationship bring perceived abuse conduct.
the notion that men should fight (when that would be considered aggressive and punishable...by the very office you would curtail to respond more fully from.) is not an option. i don't think human relationship respects are restored by an inexplicable fight which gets economy and respects for some but not all.
much of what you hear about abuse to women is a deception in that it neglects to characterize the more sublime of cause and affect to abuses. and wrongly remove her from responsibility in the relationship almost totally. and there is a most dangerous legal health precipice.
please regard your submission more closely. how is it that a man should fight...where a woman has right to fight (which is not really a fight at all but a grand cluster of public relations events drawing from partially related real experiences in the news ) against mans fight for respects of person or society. ???
see the madness..? your fight for special interests in an appointed human rights (and therefore relations) counsel.... a fight to keep the man from fighting...is adding fuel to a fire. and a human rights counsel has no right to quash all males human rights to grant inhuman artifice as humanly beneficial.
methinks you have confusions and had not been healed from your visions and experiences...
do your human rights counsel advisories include good counsellors in your living location....?.....online...? | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 11:06:30 AM | ...
dear gentle whisper
please review some of my responses to gather some notion of what a male fight may look like while respects are considered and tried in response....to partially clad intents of secret society...
if you do not respond to me personally...you will have perpetrated a disrespect to my attentions to your mind feeling substance. yet i will not be able to cry abuse ... nor be soothed of any prospective secret endeavour in this complex society.
thus...redoubled abuse.
do prejudices against all or select-worthy males in personal and impersonal society be upheld in your human rights forum...?
let us hope not ...and i believe they know greater.
i shall see to it. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 3:21:33 PM | | May God have mercy on the women, daughters, sisters, mothers, aunts, of this world. Lord knows these forums don't. Good luck folks. The forum scene is over for me. I should have known going in that its all about bullies and sarcastic, know it alls trolling the forums looking for their next pray. So be it. The bullies have spoken. Not with their heads but with their foolish pride. I pitting people who come to forums its like going to combat. I will leave the angry bitter souls to you their plight to destroy anyone who dare come to the forums. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 3:28:27 PM | ...
denial is the reason people remain non-receptive to an others expression.
denial keeps from healing. denial wants to avenge or capitalize on its opportunity.
i accept that the minds of some are unprepared to see relationship.
can they accept their own obstinacy (bully) to remain being perceived as victim...
for their right to enact other disputes..?
lets hope so...because the indirects and sidewardness of communication serves no one except they whom advantage deception.
be well all | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 3:37:22 PM | ...
oh. as a person that has witnessed abuse either as 1st person or 2nd or 3rd person my whole life...i would not condone physical abuse on any ...but there is something abusive in the persistent complaint of one which claim to speak for many but not speak for all or truth.
ms gentle whisper. women know that there are contradictions of speakable and unspeakable abuse for she sees it occur to male and children population as she sees it happen to women.
if your cause is awareness and information sharing.....let that be your cause and be receptive to it being modified....else at the risk of showing your own deception to have laws which benefit few at the expense of many which had not informations respected of relationship.
be well in your own maturities | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 4:01:12 PM | Nope, I am still here. ;) Keeping my status as "dating" at the moment to broaden my availability and I am always up to meet new people. There is dissapointments even in internet dating, and it takes time, as it takes for live dating too... good side is that in theory all people here should be single, of course you can always say anything in your profile. That is called dishonesty and it is common phenomenom nowadays.
Finding a date takes lots of patience and time. And "Mr. Right" doesnt drop from heavens, to be honest everyone should be prepared to get their hands dirty in case they want relationship. :)
One thing I was wondering about girls at online dating sites - why they are always waiting for guys to respond to their profiles? | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 5:01:31 PM | gentle whisper
nick have I disrespected you once?
Yes you have because you demonise men by saying that the majority of us are abusers. As I am a male, this disrespects me as what you are saying disrespects everyone in my gender.
Your anger toward me is not healthy or productive
Your anger towards men is not healthy or productive
I have been around 55 yrs. Have 2 sons 36 and 37 and 3 grandsons 14, 12, and 1. Do you think I hate them? They are my life. I would give my life for them. And they are all male.
Everyone has men/woman in their family, that still doesn't stop them from being haters.
If that logic of yours was true, no haters would exist. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 9:28:09 PM |
I should have known going in that its all about bullies and sarcastic, know it alls trolling the forums looking for their next pray.
But did you know that you would be the one doing the bullying?
I will leave the angry bitter souls to you their plight to destroy anyone who dare come to the forums.
The only angry and bitter person I have seen in the last several pages of this thread is you. | |
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| Decent guys: are they all either taken or gay?
Posted: 10/29/2009 9:33:26 PM |
If men really want to love women then try to understand what they go through and how they are treated. Show compassion instead of sarcastic, mean spiritied inconsiderate babble.
Yet you are blatantly refusing to give men the same consideration and understanding that you demand we give women. | |
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