| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 12:03:25 PM | I think that the reality is that what drives a man's interest in a woman really comes down to sex. I also think that fundamentally there is nothing that is more important to a man than sex--the profile and contents, merely clues about that particular woman, and a good road map as to the best way of approach and engagement.
I don't think that I always believed this as strongly as I do now--but I've seen nothing but continued evidence of this particular truth in action in my own dating life. I don't think men and women don't truly deviate from these wants. Men coming across more brashly in their desire and most women not so stridently, but the demand nevertheless there.
Overall I believe that women often come at it in a different manner and this is often more about comfort level with a particular approach. Some play at seduction, and love that interplay...the men use the same road map and clues...but maybe there are a few extra hoops along the way....Some are more open and can match the man equally with her drive and demands, not caring if it's known or not...they too may have other things that they are looking for in the man as well - but to them sex won't be compromised in the search if it's readily available by the man. And there are those that feel that there is a place and time for sex and that expression comes only with a more developed level of trust...some sort of organized thought around particular timing seems to work for these folks for the eventual decision to engage. I think problems crop up not because people don't want sex, but because they can be mismatched in their approach to looking for sex and in their understanding as to the tacit agreement to have sex.
In case it bears repeating - jmo.
edit
~~ | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 12:38:21 PM | ^^^^
Sex is an important part.
But not the primary part.
If you are finding that...then you may need to expand your horizons. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 12:58:42 PM |
I think that the reality is that what drives a man's interest in a woman really comes down to sex.
Yes..... that would be true...... BUT the biggest sex organ imaginable is the brain. There are a lot of women that have a high libido too.... who are very "sex-oriented" too..... but it all starts in the mind. How a person acts in the bedroom tells you a lot about the inner workings of the person.... you just have to know how to read the signs. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 1:05:09 PM | I can answer that question with another.
Do all women think that life is like a harlequin novel? When the guy on the white horse comes over the hill and sweeps you off to a castle...let me know...I'LL marry him.
We're in the 21st Century. There are lots of single and divorced people out there that are no longer interested in marriage. They date. They like to date and guess what...if two consenting adults spend time together and they have some degree of attraction...oh horrors!...sex is gonna break out! | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 1:33:40 PM | | It's not like i ever said that i wasn't having sex or didn't like it. I just don't see why a relationship has to be based on who the better lay was. And ok so to some i may not have a very appealing profile as one stated but darn does that actually mean that you may have to contact a person because they don't have ever little detail of their life on their profile. So i'm doing something with my life that interests me, and you don't see what you like in my profile so move on why comment at all on my profile, or how i'm living my life. All i asked for was a response to what had happened. I could careless what one may think of my profile that wasn't the purpose of this post. You may not like my views on sex but in this day and age and with all the risks of STDs even with protection it just doesn't seem worth it to me, and which is probably the reason i don't have any. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 1:39:26 PM |
Yes..... that would be true...... BUT the biggest sex organ imaginable is the brain.
All sexual arousal is centered in the brain. That's the problem with a lot of people. Their " learnin' " gets in the way of their brain function...
There are a lot of women that have a high libido too.... who are very "sex-oriented" too..... but it all starts in the mind.
They'll make your knees weak... | |
|
| So are you saying...
Posted: 6/15/2009 1:47:16 PM |
You may not like my views on sex but in this day and age and with all the risks of STDs even with protection it just doesn't seem worth it to me, and which is probably the reason i don't have any.
...that you plan to be celibate for the rest of your life?
You said it - " it just doesn't seem worth it to me, and which is probably the reason i don't have any".
That doesn't sound to me like someone who likes sex very much. Because most of us are out here having (responsible) sex, and consider the marginal risks well worth it. | |
|
| |
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 1:54:34 PM | | The horror (sex), the generalization (sex), to think that we guys (sex) only think of sex (more sex) is absolutely ridiculous (sex). We do have other thoughts (sex) as well. Such as how to (sex) satisfy our Johnson. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 1:55:53 PM | ya can't really put all men in the same category as this guy. I believe this sight is a lot like a cyberbar ans sure there are a number of horn dogs here. I'm really confused why you would feel so small and so degraded just because some knuckle head said something stupid to you? That's about him not about you. His inability to judge character is what that is about not you. It seems to me that that experience is good for you to get a thicker skin. Life is full of "what the hell just happened" moments or "well that was just nuts" moments. Can I have an amen...  | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 2:04:39 PM | By sex I am assuming you mean sexual intercourse/activity. No, its not all some think about. Some of us relate physical love with friendship, companionship and a willingness to be monogamous. Some of us pursue intellectual activities, helping others help themselves, and taking the time to appreciate a sunset or a sunrise. Some of us usually find partners interested in the same thing eventually.
Not bloodly likely at this site.
 | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 2:08:59 PM | | i'm not putting all men in the same category. I was asking about Both sexes. Where in the subject does it say is sex all that Men think about? No it says Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about. And i do have responsible sex but i'm not out there spreading my legs to everyone that has a p****. Sex doesn't have a priority in my life right now and i have my own personal reasons for that. | |
|
| |
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 3:39:16 PM |
Sex doesn't have a priority in my life right now and i have my own personal reasons for that.
If sex ISN'T a priority for you, then why are you "looking for Dating" as your profile shows, hmmm???
Are you trying to convince us that you're looking to date for the purposes of Celibacy?
I doubt it.
But then you also claim to be in fear of getting an STD... Pullleease...
And while you are saying *now* that your not putting men 'all in the same category, let's take another look on what you originally posted:
So is Sex all that anyone ever thinks about now a days? I just recently had a guy pretty much want to sleep with one girl and then he thought that he was going to sleep with me tomorrow. i have never felt so small and so degraded before and this was coming from the mouth of a guy who so called "liked" me...which i think all he had in mind was sex. So i was just wondering if this is all that anyone thinks about now a days and their life revolves around it. i sure know that mine doesn't but that is just me.
So at first you say everyone... but then you talk about a guy who has sex on the brain... and ONLY a guy. And you have the same Naive tone like sex only benefits guys and that girls such as you don't get any pleasure out of the simple physical act of sex.
Majecticbeauty... you're dishing out BS and THAT'S why I'm hard on you.
 | |
|
| |
| |
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 4:37:11 PM | Very Funny Feather... I wasn't trying to be sexual.
Now let me get a Teabag for my tea before I snuggle with my Poossy Cat and eat some of this delicious Cream Pie I have here.
 | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 5:12:28 PM | You may not like my views on sex but in this day and age and with all the risks of STDs even with protection it just doesn't seem worth it to me, and which is probably the reason i don't have any.
I don't see how your views on sex would be something likeable, personally.
You don't seem to value it much. It seems living life mitigating the potential of getting an STD is a more prominent focus and priority.
That's hardly an aphrodisiac.
No it says Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about.
Well, seeing that it's a rhetorical question, it would logically be expected that posters would post based on what they speculate you are really trying to determine.
Pointed questions, get the most precise answers,
And i do have responsible sex but i'm not out there spreading my legs to everyone that has a p****.
You are communicating 3 things there.
1- You have responsible sex.
2- For you, spreading your legs is having sex.
3- You are conjuring that were you to spread your legs that it's a summons, You are also concluding that everyone who has a p**** and would use it, would be irresponsible, would be promiscuous, and you conclude, would want to have sex with you.
Sex doesn't have a priority in my life right now and i have my own personal reasons for that.
Perhaps you should examine your reasons more closely. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 5:25:50 PM |
Like I previously posted, it doesn't take 3 months to get "to know" somebody. And as far as getting a friend with benefits, well that would defeat the whole purpose and definition of what I'm in search of. ONE woman. Not some whore who I can bang anytime without the emotional tie. What is good about that? I can have that any day of the week. What kind of future does that have???
Hey!
A man said this... What is said in real life, what is said in anger...may not be what is idealistically and "politically correct"...but...ya know??? It's a truth...
think that the reality is that what drives a man's interest in a woman really comes down to sex. I also think that fundamentally there is nothing that is more important to a man than sex--the profile and contents, merely clues about that particular woman, and a good road map as to the best way of approach and engagement.
Very true...it is what drives him. Whether he gets it right away??...Nope ...until he sees that there is something about her that draws him back for more...of her...and not just sex. She is light, she is mystery, she is frustrating, she is lovely, she is puzzling, she is teasing, she is pleasing, she is mesmerizing, she can make him angry, she can make him sad...and it draws him back more than anything else. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 5:47:10 PM | "there is something about her that draws him back for more...of her...and not just sex. She is light, she is mystery, she is frustrating, she is lovely, she is puzzling, she is teasing, she is pleasing, she is mesmerizing, she can make him angry, she can make him sad...and it draws him back more than anything else."
Nice...what Harleuin novel was that out of?
Isn't it interesting...women love to talk in all these safe generalities about connecting...etc...but once they realize that it might involve disrobing and getting all sweaty...suddenly....men are all pigs. | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 6:03:32 PM |
Nice...what Harleuin novel was that out of?
Isn't it interesting...women love to talk in all these safe generalities about connecting...etc...but once they realize that it might involve disrobing and getting all sweaty...suddenly....men are all pigs.
I read Harlequin novels.... but that doesn't mean I have the attitude you are suggesting about sex and sexuality. There was an in-depth psychological study done a number of years ago, where they measured the emotional responses of women reading romance novels to the emotional responses of men watching their favourite TV sports. They came out almost equal.... and the conclusion of the study was that both activities are "brain candy" for the participant... whether it is a female watching sports or a male reading romance novels.. or vice versa. It is really not safe to generalize in these forums.... you just might get attacked for that behaviour.
"there is something about her that draws him back for more...of her...and not just sex. She is light, she is mystery, she is frustrating, she is lovely, she is puzzling, she is teasing, she is pleasing, she is mesmerizing, she can make him angry, she can make him sad...and it draws him back more than anything else."
Where in there did you get that the poster had a problem with sex???.... I read it more that the poster is saying there has to be more than sex.... there has to be that special attraction to keep someone coming back for more. Sure, she said it in the context of the male coming back for more, but we all know that nowadays, it can just as easily be the female..... we are long past the simpering female waiting for the phone to ring.
It DOES take more.... but as any mature single person knows, sex is part of the package..... and if we think otherwise, we need to give our head a shake. That is friendship then.... nothing more.
JMHO | |
|
| |
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 6:54:57 PM |
know OP, it's sad isn't it?
Men are starting to act like sex-starved teenage boys. Maybe the younger men are looking more for an LTR? I know the 40+ year olds I've dated from POF seem to be looking for FWB only.
Huh...? I'm all stressed out from all of your acronyms.. I need sex to relieve the tension... | |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 6:59:52 PM |
Nice...what Harleuin novel was that out of?
If you spelled it right...Harlequin...
Ohhh...that?.....Just sitting here having a Guniness...and it simply fell out of the romantic part of my brain...you know...romance??
but once they realize that it might involve disrobing and getting all sweaty...suddenly....men are all pigs.
Ohhhh...believe me...with the "pig" that pushes the right buttons for me...I can happily get downright sweaty....
Sure, she said it in the context of the male coming back for more, but we all know that nowadays, it can just as easily be the female..... we are long past the simpering female waiting for the phone to ring.
In real life, the biggest issue is...what brings a man back when he's had sex with you?
But, since we are on POF, we have to go into idealistic mode. Click...click...OK...done.
The man is pining and simpering... awaiting your call to him on the phone. What...in your experience has brought you back to him??
| |
|
| Is Sex all that Everyone thinks about?
Posted: 6/15/2009 7:02:33 PM | "If you spelled it right...Harlequin..."
Ooops...well..I guess I never read one. How empty my life is!
"Ohhhh...believe me...with the "pig" that pushes the right buttons for me...I can happily get downright sweaty.... "
Got a date in mind? Oink..oink.
Ohh..excuse me...it's been 3 minutes...I need to think about sex again...oops...I just did...damn! | |
|
Home
login 
