Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age? Free Dating, Singles and Personals

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest 100% free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.

Show ALL Forums

> Over 45

> Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age?

Mod Threads

Home

Page 3 of 3

1, 2, 3

Author

Thread: Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age?

maeflowers

Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 49
view profile
History

Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age? Posted: 6/17/2009 4:23:20 PM
What you trying to say Ms Mae? geez I thought great minds think alike and so do ours but I guess not. ...I am trying to say that I have indeed fallen in love at first sight...ok maybe not so much love, but I've really, really liked someone at first sight. Whatever it was it really got the old adrenaline going haha ...maeflowers

flowerforce

Joined: 9/6/2006
Msg: 50
view profile
History

Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age? Posted: 6/17/2009 4:33:47 PM
There is nothing like "romance" or "love at first sight" Sadly most romances unless backed up with mature loving do not last. How lovely to have those butterflies in your stomach and be breathless in the presence of your "love object." Loving takes time, attention, emotional intimacy,trust and a whole lot more. It cannot happen at first sight. What happens is you end up loving who you think that person is. Not who s/he really is. Some lucky people will still have those "romance /love at first sight" feelings for their SO for a lifetime. Many of us will develop loving "romantic feelings" over time. Personally I mistrust that high romance state because it means that I am not seeing the person, I am seeing my romantic image of that person which is not real. If I happen to have those feelings I will continue to date that person but I will not act on my attraction unless and until I know and trust the person and have a clearer image of him/her. I believe even as mature adults we long for that instant "love"and if it is not there instantly many of us move on looking for it which says little for our emotional maturity.

PHOENIX2930

Joined: 6/9/2009
Msg: 51
view profile
History

Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age? Posted: 6/17/2009 4:40:11 PM
Sure it can happen at our age. At first it might be better described as attraction, but if there is any magic there it progresses so quickly it blurs that distinction.

flowerforce

Joined: 9/6/2006
Msg: 52
view profile
History

Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age? Posted: 6/17/2009 5:13:18 PM
Msg#42, I think it is sad that you have such a bitter opinion of men. I imagine you are frightened. If your fear is holding you back go see a therapist and work it through.There are a lot of really wonderful men in the pond. I have met a number of them. Just because I was "not their cup of tea" so to speak does not make them "married, boring, annoying or too good to be true" Nor are they available because they are "not good for a successful relationship" any more than we women are. Yes there are a number of players on dating sites but then there are a lot of women who do the same. It is not a matter of needing someone but of wanting to share my life with a like minded companion. I have great life. I earn a good living, have a great career, own my own home, have good friends-male and female to share a laugh with. I am a smart busy woman. If I only wanted in a man in my life was for sex I would hire an escort or have sex with any old fellow who came along and be done with it. I believe I will one day meet the person who will be the partner, lover, friend and companion I am looking for. I believe he will love me and share his life with me. Yes I will meet lots of fellows who will meet me and not be interested in me as I will not be interested in some of them. That does not make me or them any less worthy of a loving relationship. So yes I "do want to go through all that. " I may never find the fellow I am looking for. My life is great as it is. But I believe there is a great fellow out in the pond that will someday become my"Mr wonderful.

andserendipity

Joined: 7/19/2008
Msg: 53
view profile
History

Love at first sight? It doesn't happen anymore in our age? Posted: 6/17/2009 5:29:46 PM
flowerforce said Sadly most romances unless backed up with mature loving do not last. How lovely to have those butterflies in your stomach and be breathless in the presence of your "love object." Loving takes time, attention, emotional intimacy,trust and a whole lot more[/unquote] i totally agree with this. it can be hard to keep sane when the lightning strikes, but. the one time i gave into this that way-- good heavens i can still remember the first time i saw him-- a poet performing at a gallery space-- he was wearing a cape (i know! i know! but i was young), had the most beautiful eyes and voice, and his work so brilliant-- next time i saw him, a friend and i were at a gallery opening. he was declaiming loudly in the middle of the supercrowded room, completely sloshed, turned to gesture wildly with his arm and accidentally dumped an entire glass of red wine down my friend's front. later we became involved, he and i. (long over, but we're still friends). guess which image was the right one, long term? guess how long it took me to sort this out? (i do keep trying to be supportive, as he tries to quit drinking). (it hit him the same way as me, and i know he has the same problem around certain things i do or don't do....)