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 m_church
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 51
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What a Dirt Bag!!!!!Page 3 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

Why would you then go and take another female on a date there? 1. You're a dirt bag 2. You lack common sense. 3. You're an idiot 4. All of the above.

5... He's not in a comitted relationship
6... He barely knows the woman after 1 date....
7... If she didn't invite him, it kind of says, "I'm not intereted...."
8... He's independent and not required to ask her what is or is not appropriate behaviour or where he can or cannot go....
 Oakland Honey
Joined: 6/4/2009
Msg: 52
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What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 3:33:08 PM
Why is he a dirt bag? You jumped all possessive and went postal about a man you don't even know, aren't involved with intimately, and are not in a committed relationship with! He is not your boyfriend after one damn date! Why do you care who he is with at the concert? You are a drama queen.

Adult women should be smart enough to know that people are not sitting around twiddling their thumbs waiting to meet you. And I mean the general "you" not you specifically tracymalibu. This is what single men and women do - date around until they find someone they want to be with exclusively. You went out with him ONE TIME! You could have gone out with him again the next day and every day the next week and he still WOULD NOT BE YOUR BOYFRIEND. That means what he did wasn't foul or fonky in any way or rude or wrong.

What you should have done was go up to him with a gracious smile to say hello. You should have introduced yourself to the woman and gave him a little hug and said "I hope hope you have a minute to come meet my friends, but if not enjoy the concert!"

That is how you do it like a PLAYA with some game. You did it like a possessive overly emotional teenager. Not cool.
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 53
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 3:38:48 PM
tracy said:During our phone conversation after the fact he told me it was their 4th date. And as far as getting really mad....actually I think it is pretty funny. I have been laughing with my friends about it all day. I just would not go on another date with him.

Most likely this was a date that was already planned before you even met him.. So in other words you do not wish to date anyone casually or what?

thecatsmeoww
 pirateheaven
Joined: 5/11/2008
Msg: 54
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What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 4:33:49 PM
Since you are not exclusive, no harm no foul. I think you over reacted a bit. If you want a man to be exclusive after one date, you will have a very hard time out there.
 FLrainbow
Joined: 3/29/2009
Msg: 55
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 4:42:27 PM
It does seem that he might have been trying to get a reaction from you. Best to move on. You need thick skin to post a thread on this site. You will get every extreme view possible!
 TheReason_
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 56
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What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 4:47:35 PM
If you turned him down, what is the harm in him going with someone else? After one date you certainly aren't exsclusive, especially when you didn't want to introduce him to your friends etc. It sounded like he called you to see if you wanted to go, you said no and that you already had plans with your friends.

What was the problem with him going with another person. Obviously he was interested in going to the event, and he was interested in going with you. When you turned him down, I'm assuming he still wanted to go and hey, why not go with someone else. The fact that you two had seen each other was simply chance. You never mentioned whether they were just there, or if they carried on in front of you, all over each other or what. THAT would have been in bad taste on his part. But from what I can see, he simply went with someone else.




Nah you did the right thing.. if he was into you .. he would never ever have blown it .. and he is a player .. he may try and contact you again.. they usually do if they can't find any very easy available .. and willing vagina... that thinks a way to a man's heart is thru his one eyed monster... not much lost in loosing that one.. but be prepared.. nit wits like that usually try to hop the sub race again.. so he can have you in his whompum album of pokey ..



Seems like you want to paint everything as black and white, everyone is a player. Somewhere, sometime, somebody did you wrong, but it wasn't that person, yet you are all to ready to lump him in with people you consider players. This SCREAMS of emotional baggage, and you really should try to deal with it, instead of trying to project your feelings about men onto other people. It's unfortunate you are so bitter about men. Why bother even being on a dating site with an attitude like that.
 evee2005
Joined: 6/10/2009
Msg: 57
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 5:08:59 PM
I've never posted before, but I was reading the threads, and honestly I think they've been a little rough on you. Okay, maybe you didn't "know" if they were on a date or not. However, I like to think that I can read body language between two people well enough to reasonably discern if they are friends, relatives, or on a date. Is there room for error there, absolutely. But usually, when something looks like crap, and smells like crap....you know where I'm going with this. I'm just saying that I don't think you jumped the gun to assume that they were on a date; I'm assuming that something probably made that pretty obvious for you to have drawn that conclusion. Second, many people seem to think your crazy jealous and out of line for being offended. I think you were right to be upset. Just because you know someone is dating other people doesn't mean you want in thrown in your face. Personally, I doubt that I could take someone seriously after I saw them out with someone else. I know my hamburger comes from a cow but I don't want to see it butchered, and if I had seen it butchered, I'd probably lose my apetite. Overplayed analogy I know, but it fits. However, I don't know why you wouldn't want your dates to meet your friends though. Honestly, I like to see if they can hang in my comfort zone. But to each his own right.
 Frau Blücher
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 58
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 5:09:46 PM
Do you honestly think that it is realistic to expect a man that you met ONE time to forgo a delightful concert date with someone else simply because YOU were going to be at the same event with your group? Sorry, but most people don’t want to wait around for Elvis to leave the building.
 RenaissanceMan1950
Joined: 2/20/2009
Msg: 59
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 5:12:49 PM

Obviously he was interested in going to the event, and he was interested in going with you. When you turned him down, I'm assuming he still wanted to go and hey, why not go with someone else.


Precisely why what he did was so cool. She wanted to "control" when he would get to meet her friends, and wanted him to learn to "accept" her control over when and whether he can see her. He didn't whine or argue, but, by his actions, was sayiing "you can control whether I can go with you, but you can't control whether I go to the jazz fest", and demonstrated to her that "he always has other options".

She's outraged, because he didn't sit home alone, pining away for her, and missing the jazz fest. By his actions, he said "ok, you don't want to go, but there's a whole wide world full of women out there, so who needs you?"

Pretty cool, and he ended up dodging a bullet. A woman who would text him, when she can see him on a date with someone else, and then feel "entitled" to an explanation....and then come on and start a thread calling him names after one date, would have been "bad news" in a relationship.
 tina7578
Joined: 2/2/2009
Msg: 60
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 5:13:29 PM
Hmmm, I think you over-reacted quite a bit. Christ, you two had only gone out ONCE. In no way was this event off limits to him just because you said you were going. I'm guessing it was quite a large festival, b/c even in my smaller town's jazz fests there are over 1000 people at them easily.

Even if he is a "player", he's dating, as are you, and he has the right to go anywhere he wants with anyone he wants until you have a committed relationship with him. You said he's new to town, so he's probably LOOKING for fun things to do and you gave him an idea ... that was your fault ... maybe it wasn't the best choice out there, but last time I checked, we don't keep territory in public places.
 warmhanded
Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 61
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:29:06 PM
I know that guy? He's a terrific fellow. That other "date" was his sister.

You lose.

Next time ask your friends, "I met this really great guy, he really wants to go to this concert, but it's way too early to meet you guys yet. Would you mind if I went with him and we do something together another time?"

You find out two things.

1. If the initial attraction was real.

2. Who you true friends are.

He's one very lucky fellow.
 whatIlikeaboutyou
Joined: 3/21/2009
Msg: 62
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:29:43 PM
I think your behavior was juvenile and rude.
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 63
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What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:42:19 PM
You are not dating him and did not want to include him with your friends. So he went to the concert you told him about with a girl that was more laid back and receptive. Email, texting phone calls and future plans do not make him your property. He wanted to go with you first.
 diamondgirl2727
Joined: 2/25/2008
Msg: 64
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 8:27:13 PM
You had one initial meeting and now your telling this guy where he can and can't go and with whom? You need to get over yourself, how would you like a man you met once acting so immature about something so trivial?
 smellsealsthedeal
Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 65
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 8:39:32 PM
Where in blazes do women get their education on the male mind.. this guy knows his intentions exactly .. he omitted to tell her he was dating someone else already .. I am not certain if she would have even had the first date with mister casual dater had she known he was already seeing someone .. else... guys will work on what they want if they want it.. easy is okay for a day but it is quickly put in the trash to pursue again... he was being very obvious and pathetically cowardice by taking his "other" casual date .. to the same function.. it was premeditated to "cut" in..

For all the gals here that claim she is overreacting.. yah right .. until that episode is in your back yard... and you get an opprotunity to appreciate the same BS ... unless you are a serial casual .. casual.. dater and whatever else ... life deals yah.. that is ridiculous ..

Here is my genie in a bottle interpretation.. he will contact this op again... mister big ego.. will contact you when things don't go with the other one or he has a tiff with her or someone else .. guys want what they can't have .. so unless you block this guy he will try and contact you again ... anyone that omits information to gain footing is a player .. this guy is very obviously someone who believes that you are in the game.. gals on here believe men have brains like theirs.... and they don't .. guys know exactly what their intentions are when they meet a female.. they also are smart enough to get the energy of .. I can casual this one.. and oh oh .. I can't casual "that one"..... the OP knows exactly what this goof ball is about .. come on the guy texts her after she sees him and asks if they are on for a date.. come on .. this is a soap opera bigger than most females I know in real life who should be up for drama queen awards... this guy repulses her and she found this disturbing and so she should.. anyone that plays these kind of head games is not .. relationship material.. anyway karma usually kicks these guys up the butt on the way in... I have seen it myself .. he will get exactly what he deserves eventually...

As for her immediately inviting a man she just met to a functional plan with friends because he is "left out" .. are you joking .. this OP actually has a life beyond casual dating .. and kudos to a woman who doesn't need to fit her casual date into every cranny of her nook.. apparently these are the type of women men are most attracted to ... females who actually have a life beyond .. waiting by the phone... so his exclusion to a grown up man would never have been an issue .. a grown up man would never invade his conquests friendship boundaries .. he earns his place in her heart..

Most of you guys here don't have any scruples or honor or decency anyway... .. if you believe this charade of game playing is acceptable behaviour good luck to finding long term love in life.. casual dates .. oh yah .. anything of significance and decency.. nope... and remember .. casual anything.. and anyone can get anywhere .. people of honor and decency would never do that to another human being.. as they can actually use their brains in more valuable ways... men don't casually date .. they casually try and retrieve a wet whistle and are not interested in having a bond with anyone besides some heavy duty leg locking.. .. any guy that is just "chilling " .. with a woman is using her .. never seen a long term love affair of value in my life that accepted the casual road.. .. remember when a guy knows what he wants he will act accordingly ....

More women should try and understand how a man thinks.. and he is not nor ever will think like a woman.. any gal here that is into casual will likely remain that way . Would any females here take the date .. after that episode.. ? If you say yes then you are already the type that sets yourself up to be used.. remember men know exactly what their intentions are .. with a woman and you believing you are in some sort of competition for his affection is way way wrong.. guys use that to get what they want.. and females play along .. without even thinking.. I call it the tale of the golden vagina.. they think that if they compete they will win his affection but men are not like that .. women are .. men know who they want to bond with .. emotionally .. if they play a game and you take a position he has some to toy with .. but believe me .. none of the women who will play into this casual.. your next .. dating atmosphere in a man's mind will ever be "the one". When a guy spys his "one" casual dating is not even in the equation.. he is on her like a fly to cow dung .. he is planning the next time .. because he "feels" something for her .. beyond an erection.. no relationship of value is ever seen as casual in a grown man's mind.. look into the eyes of a man in his seventies who really loves his woman.. he chose her .. because he knew she wasn't ever going to settle into casual anything.. he wakes up everyday and knows he has honor and is honored.. a discipline few can actually say they own today.. it takes courage to have honor .. and most men on this site are cowards.. or emotionally not erectionally invested elsewhere.
 RenaissanceMan1950
Joined: 2/20/2009
Msg: 66
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 8:50:47 PM

Where in blazes do women get their education on the male mind.. this guy knows his intentions exactly .. he omitted to tell her he was dating someone else already .. I am not certain if she ]have even had the first date with mister casual dater had she known he was already seeing someone .. else... guys will work on what they want if they want it.. easy is okay for a day but it is quickly put in the trash to pursue again... he was being very obvious and pathetically cowardice by taking his "other" casual date .. to the same function.. it was premeditated to "cut" in..


Having seen this poster in action in several posts, I say, with compassion, that there are some people who need to seek out professional counseling, in order to resolve their "issues" with the opposite sex. Being on a "dating" site, when one is totally controlled by anger and bitterness, won't resolve anything. Nor, in reading such posts, will anyone give any credence to the "venting". It's unfortunate, but it's not about the situation described by the OP.
 smellsealsthedeal
Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 67
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 8:57:11 PM
Yah you are right .. you need counselling .. you seem to have my knowledge of the male mind confused with bitterness and anger, because other women agree with you without any working knowledge of how men think.. .. I don't plan on becoming a shlup to what I know about men and honor .. like I said few people are grown up and few men truly respect a females emotional well being. Any good guy would never ever behave like that .. not all men are made of honor .. but all men know exactly what their intentions are.



will anyone give any credence to the "venting".
yah .. you just did!!! thanks.. and anyway .. who is "anyone?"

I base my opini0ns on a mindset of acquired data and research not pluck it out of thin air... besides that .. common sense really needs to become fashionable again ,,, irrate you better believe it .. women are the gate keepers and there is nothing that tics me off more than females who don't spend time understanding how men think.. they just read .. the cosmo 5000 ways to get scr-ew.. dah...
 Heathen Chemistry
Joined: 5/18/2009
Msg: 68
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:06:28 PM
OP is the one coming off like a "dirtbag." You tell the guy about an event, don't invite him...this get pissy because he attends with someone else(probably hotter).

You saved this guy a few wasted dates Hell you probably saved any guy an Florida who reads this a waste of time.
 RenaissanceMan1950
Joined: 2/20/2009
Msg: 69
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:08:13 PM

other women agree with you without any working knowledge of how men think.. .. I don't plan on becoming a shlup to what I know about men and honor


IN this particular thread, all we know is that the OP and a guy had a first date. He expressed an interest in going to a jazz fest with her, but she thought it too soon to introduce him to her friends. So, he took someone else. That's all we really know from the OP.

She then had a hissy fit, because he had another date, and responded in a juvenile way, texting him while he was on a date with someone else, and resorting to name calling.

That's all we know. It has nothing to do with some so-called "male mind". Someone who projects her own anger and misandry onto every situation, is a "woman with issues". Get help, if you're willing, because I can't imagine what man in his right mind would find anything attractive about the man hating attitude that just oozes out of every post you put up in the fora.
 smellsealsthedeal
Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 70
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:15:22 PM
Kids.. a
amnesiac ............there it is .. in black and white .. a gal who is thinking and playing right into the mentality of competing to be the "golden vagina.." This is exactly the type of disrespectful to another females emotional intelligence that guys love.. a gal they can use .. to wet their wiener til a decent thinker comes along.. that form of bullying mentality is exactly what a player likes.. he doesn't have to do anything to get the results.. she is doing it for him..

Real grown up men don't " get pissy .." kids do.. the someone who you may believe is hotter isn't " the one" .. the one is someone who won't join in the game playing because she has human decency and is not into .. childish behaviours...
wasted dates .. are you kidding me .. wasted is for the wasted.. any women who believes that she is in a competition for a man's interest .. is going to get exactly what a guy will give you .. user friendly ..
 turbulence1981
Joined: 4/13/2009
Msg: 71
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:16:09 PM
GOOD ON YOU for telling this bag that any future appointments will be cancelled.

There is definitely something about this guy that wreaks dishonesty. Don't know what it is, but good on you.

Take care girlfriend.
 Passionate Gent
Joined: 5/2/2009
Msg: 72
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:16:28 PM
Funny how you think he should have rearranged his dating event for you - you said yourself he's been on 4 dates with this woman, apparently he has more "invested" with her, than with you. Since he has more invested, why should he make different arrangements?

And the obvious question..how come you did not desire to be with him at this event, instead of taking your friends? Simply because you are not really into this guy, I think he knew that also.

Most men and women know that people on a dating site are dating others, and I Hope you grow out of this jealousy before you start a real relationship with someone. Just another episode of a man or woman who thinks they are the last potential on earth.

Nothing is more stupid than ridiculing others, when their own personality stinks

It never ends..hehe
 smellsealsthedeal
Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 73
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:23:30 PM
anyone read this thread in entirety? the op said she had already had previous commitments to that festival with .. friends . she should drop .. her plans for a second. casual date??? sorry but that sounds suffocating.. and no way should anyone drop their life after the first date.. especially the female in the relationship....

as for the op mentioning the other woman.. no that came up later .. he omitted this information .. not a females idea of a brain turn on.. I doubt she is the type to take the first date when he is already dating someone else.. why invest where you cannot .. for a wet vagina.. get real...females can get wet vagina anywhere .. she sounds as though she is a passionate women searching for a man who is into her ...... if he is already into someone else and keeping his three eyes open he isn't interested in either of them.. at all....and good that the OP has that already figured out .. a gal with self esteem who knows her personal worth should have been outraged by the errors of ommission and the audacity of the nit wit to contact her to still see if she wants to play .. " who is hotter .. wetter faster and stupider... """ glad to see some females on here don't believe that they are casual in worth .. in anyway .. to themselves or anyone else...
 Passionate Gent
Joined: 5/2/2009
Msg: 74
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:27:52 PM
I still think her reaction was immature. Neither is taking someone on a date an indicator that they are looking for a cheap thrill.

What should he do, sit at home twittling his thumbs, he has just as much right as she has to have a good time.

They need to change the name of this place to "Plenty Of Gossip"
 Heathen Chemistry
Joined: 5/18/2009
Msg: 75
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 6/21/2009 9:28:57 PM
Let's just agree to disagree. I think the OP thinks she is God's gift to men. Others think he was being "shady."

They both got off with mnimal drama.
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