| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 10/20/2009 9:30:35 AM | Us guys want you to make the first move.....
But in a way that makes it seem like we made the first move.....
Remember the Greek wedding movie about the head (of the household) and the neck? It applies here as well. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 10/20/2009 10:16:24 AM |
Us guys want you to make the first move.....
But in a way that makes it seem like we made the first move.....
Remember the Greek wedding movie about the head (of the household) and the neck? It applies here as well.
Good luck with that. There are few women who are willing to make a move who won't want to take the credit. And why not? Don't see the big deal there.
If you want the credit, make the move - regardless of gender. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 10/20/2009 10:26:34 AM | | Yes ladies go ahead and make the first move if you want. Most men would appreciate it. It can get extremely tiring having to initiate everything. Go for it. I don't even know why this is an issue....Nobody is going to go 'oh you made the first move.....forget it, NO SOUP FOR YOU' lol | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 10/20/2009 10:28:11 AM | I've found better success and alot less frustration by letting women make the first move here on PoF. Most messages are of the exact type that I see people complaining about often, "Saw your profile, if you are interested message me back".
To me that is a perfectly acceptable message to receive, as long as most of the words are spelled correctly and if there is at least an attempt to include punctuation.
Granted I get alot less messages than any woman on this site, maybe 2 or 3 a week. So I don't have a ton to sort through, but I have seen the other side of it, and REALLY appreciate an interesting opening message.
In my opinion women have a lot of power in online dating. I am perfectly fine with it, it's actually a nice change of pace. I just wish more women realized it and were a bit more proactive in searching. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 10/20/2009 10:35:08 AM | | In todays society and with new rules and safety concerns, many men are more careful about making a first move. It would be nice if women felt the same desire and weren't afraid to make the first move, or maybe make it obvious that they are interested... I like assertive and intelligent women that aren't afraid of making that move... | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 10/20/2009 3:05:08 PM | | I like it. Read my profile as I have it on there a couple times. I don't have a type and I date tall women, short women, thin women and overweight women and I am after what is between the ears. I think women have a look they repeat in dating so I tell them if I favorite you I would like to talk to you and add me as a favorite and I will contact you if you fit what I am looking for and I have only not contacted one woman. Just got tired of hearing I'm not your type. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/3/2009 4:26:26 PM | Ugh I agree. If you have to chase something by default, it's not really for you (or that into you). That goes for men do. Just don't do it....no means no. Period.
Except, some if not many women actually value persistence.
^^^Most of us will if we see someone we actually want to message or chat with. Its not true and you know it.
I do try to make the first move, as often as possible. I mean, the worst that can happen is that the guy isn't interested, right?
There are times, though, when I don't make a move, much as I may want to, because I'm not feeling too confident, and don't think I'm what they're looking for anyway.
It happens to everyone. I myself wont approach those whom I feel are way outside my league so to speak. Im just a realistic person.
It's against nature for women to pursue a man.
I agree with you.
Its against nature for women to be control.
Men should always be the ones in control.
We shouldnt let women approach men first because if we let them, what else will they do next?
They will start asking to be allowed to vote, to be allowed to join the army, to be allowed to divorce their husbands, to be allowed to get equal pay, to be allowed to get an education, and ultimately to be allowed to run for president.
What will become of the world if those things happen?
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/3/2009 6:16:05 PM | DO EET
I don't like to contact girls who view me and don't send me a message. To me it says: I didn't like what I saw"
Now if a girl favorites me...then I'll check it out and decide if I want to message. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/3/2009 6:22:31 PM |
...What will become of the world if those things happen?
Sarah Palin will be the first woman president?  | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/3/2009 7:17:55 PM | SARCASM
Sarcasm is a form of humor that uses sharp, cutting remarks or language intended to mock, wound, or subject to contempt or ridicule, generally saying the opposite of what the statement really is.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarcasm | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/3/2009 7:20:18 PM | I happen to use a lot of sarcasm, and the second half of it resembled such, but wasn't acompanied by any type of warning that it was sarcasm. Since few here have a sense of humor, I assumed it was a straight forward answer.
It just doesn't always translate well in a message board - offline is better.
I'll delete. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/3/2009 10:12:36 PM | I say go for it too.
Take 50 men and line them up against a wall and 50 women and line them up against the opposite wall. If given the choice, would you prefer to be the one choosing from the 50 men or would you rather hope that the one man that you wanted picked you?
You definately increase the odds of getting what you want by putting your pride aside and making the first move. This goes for both sexes. Why do you think men have taken this lead all these years? You thought it was they loved the chase? | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/6/2009 12:25:04 PM | | I think its better for women to make the first move online rather than in person... because online there is no way for him to come across you unless its explicit... but in real life, if he was physically attracted to you... he would eventually get over any fear/anxiety and hit on you. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/6/2009 1:30:56 PM |
he would eventually get over any fear/anxiety and hit on you.
It depends on the situation. Feminist-spawned PC has given way to all sorts of pitfalls in some situations, particularly the workplace, where a romantic advance can easily become a sexual-harassment complaint which most men would just rather not chance. Women have the distinct benefit of knowing that men don't engage in that kind of BS, and can approach at will.
It's just my personal policy never to "hit on" anyone. If she's interested enough, she'll make a move. If she's NOT interested enough to make a move, I wouldn't bother anyway. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/6/2009 2:22:16 PM | I have yet to be made a move on by a good looking woman !
I do get first messages from women but none i fancy.
Sounds like I get the desperate ones !
Never mind, I would rather live alone than be with someone i didnt fancy..... | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/6/2009 3:33:55 PM |
I have yet to be made a move on by a good looking woman !
I do get first messages from women but none i fancy.
Sounds like I get the desperate ones !
Never mind, I would rather live alone than be with someone i didnt fancy.....
Do you think you are good looking? | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/7/2009 1:42:21 PM | At least when a woman makes the first move on here it does show to the guy that she is at least in some way INTERESTED, so therefore he is at least flattered by the attention.
On the other hand when a guy messages a woman ( because he is interested in her in some way ) she in most cases wont " fancy " him so she ignores him....end of.
When she recieves a message from a guy SHE fancies she will of course lap up the attention.
She WILL of course make the first move on a guy she thinks is very good looking but will generally ignore the not-so-good looking guys.
Generally most men love the attention they get from the vast majority of women. I know i do but this doesnt happen very often.
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/8/2009 7:35:14 AM | Let's look at this...
At least when a woman makes the first move on here it does show to the guy that she is at least in some way INTERESTED, so therefore he is at least flattered by the attention.
When a man makes the first move here or anywhere else it shows the woman he's at least interested in some way, and therefore SHE is at least flattered by the attention. It's the same thing in reverse.
On the other hand when a guy messages a woman ( because he is interested in her in some way ) she in most cases wont " fancy " him so she ignores him....end of.
When a woman messages a guy here in most cases he won't fancy her and probably won't respond (tho who cares what he does if he's not interested anyway - we're not as picky about getting a response).
When she recieves a message from a guy SHE fancies she will of course lap up the attention.
Why wouldn't she? When a man recieves a message from a woman he fancies he probably will too.
She WILL of course make the first move on a guy she thinks is very good looking but will generally ignore the not-so-good looking guys.
It amazes me that some men are still discovering women tend to go with what they are attracted to (or what's good looking to us), when not only is it a given but these men probably do the same thing. If you have attraction to a woman, it doesn't end there - she also has to be attracted back. It's a two way street. Why is this so hard to understand?
Generally most men love the attention they get from the vast majority of women. I know i do but this doesnt happen very often.
Again, women like attention too - none of this is gender specific. Sure women tend to get more attention than men overall - but it's men who create this dynamic. | |
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| Girls making the first move???
Posted: 11/8/2009 8:22:07 AM | ^^^^^^^^^^
what you are forgetting too is that the majority of men are not as fussy or as picky as the majority of women are.
I once messaged about 20 women to see if i would get any replies and i think 2 responded even tho if i remember correctly i think all my messages were read.
What iam saying ( and ^^^^ you should know this being a woman your self ) in the vast majority of cases when a woman messages a guy she WILL get a reply but the majority of times a woman will ignore most messages from the majority of mem.............why is this so difficult for some women to understand.
When i recieve a message i WILL reply , i WILL make time to reply as in my opinion its the decent thing to do.
I have also had the decency to reply to women who really arnt my type either as i think that is polite too, if i was approached in the street and some one said " hello " i would say hello back....i think its polite to do so. | |
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