| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 2/25/2008 7:31:55 PM |
Angeline...I think you're more in the "few extra pounds" category than BBW.
Yeah, that's what I thought too..and she's tall.... | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 2/25/2008 7:46:21 PM | There's an insinuation that being a heavy woman and being frustrated that you are judged negatively on your appearance while not liking heavy men is hypocritical.
This is backwards.
Pretty much all the research on the most preferred physiques shows that men tend to prefer average to underweight women while women prefer overweight to very overweight men (within NA and Western Europe). Therefore, it is thin men who tend to be culturally stereotyped as unattractive, not heavy. In fact, over half the posts I've seen in this thread come right out and say that skinny men are unattractive. (can you imagine the furor over the blanket dismissal of heavy women with such unanimity?).
The implication in the OP is that heavy women are more frequently judged negatively by their appearance and therefore would be hypocritical to judge larger men this way. But, in fact, for the men it is the skinny ones who are judged negatively. For a heavy woman to be considered hypocritical because she rejected men who are more frequently judged negatively based on their appearance she would have to reject skinny men, not heavy.
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 2/25/2008 8:25:40 PM | Cookies: Very good points.
I've seen in this thread come right out and say that skinny men are unattractive. (can you imagine the furor over the blanket dismissal of heavy women with such unanimity?). Yes, this is one of my pet peeves. If someone isn't attracted to a certain body-type, short, fat, tall, thin, etc, that isn't a problem...when people bash the people who have the body type they're not attracted to...that IS a problem.
I agree about thin men...I think our society has come to expect that women be thin or curvy, but perfectly proportioned and men are pressured to be buff, built, muscular, etc. I know a number of men who are thin that say they have a hell of a time with dating. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 2/25/2008 9:13:21 PM | | I don't mind a chunkier guy as long as he's trying to get fit. I'm not perfect, I dont expect someone else to be. BUT I do like a guy who is out going and fun. I mean even if he's a little over weight, so what? He's fun, nice and cool then great! | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 2/28/2008 1:12:29 PM | There are many hypocrites within these murky waters of POF and some are quick to throw stones of insults causing ripples to disturb the tranquil surface of harmonous inter-action.
One could never please all or be anybody else other who one is ...no matter how hard one tries; but in loving eyes of someone out there somewhere ...one is indeed beauitful and unique ...and within that compassionate heart one would be embraced with the gentlest of love and care ...just the way one is.
Remember not everyone would reciprocate the interest we show and neither would we favor to all who make advances toward us. | |
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jf468
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Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 256 | |
| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 2/28/2008 1:32:14 PM | Pretty much all the research on the most preferred physiques shows that men tend to prefer average to underweight women while women prefer overweight to very overweight men (within NA and Western Europe). Therefore, it is thin men who tend to be culturally stereotyped as unattractive, not heavy. In fact, over half the posts I've seen in this thread come right out and say that skinny men are unattractive. (can you imagine the furor over the blanket dismissal of heavy women with such unanimity?).
Maybe a lot of women aren't attracted to very thin men. But I think that is because they are often attracted to athletic/fit, muscular, or average men. A lot of women might also date a man that is chubby, but most women I know aren't attracted to extremely overweight / obese men. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:08:46 PM | | Im a big man! Where are the women that are looking for big cuddly guys! Sure not in Pennsylvania! | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:29:40 PM | Isnt it funny how ugly people say you shouldnt judge people on looks !!!
For me I want the full package, good looks with a nice personality. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/5/2008 3:27:26 PM | Jeez, harrabyman, how about be a little more judgmental, why doncha?
On topic, I just got out of a 17-year marriage. I wasn't fat when I went into it, but I was when I came out. Getting back into the dating scene has been very different, partly because I've just gotten rusty, but partly because of my size and how I feel about it. (I've recently lost 25 pounds, for me and not to try to be more attractive to anyone.)
The first man I started seeing with any regularity after my divorce is also large. I've never been with a man who was, and wasn't sure what I'd think. It was different. I figured out pretty quickly that I LOVE IT!!! | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/5/2008 7:53:03 PM | good points made on the blanket body type statements.
i am def a BBW (and looking for a whole body shot for my profile that isn't crappy looking because the picture-taker sucked at using my iPhone camera but that's another story and i might start to ramble), and i happen to prefer "skinny" dudes at the moment (**recently found out how, um, easily GREAT things can happen when times get hot and heavy--no pun : )
...anyway, just wanted to put my .02 cents worth in for the first time. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/15/2008 10:57:13 AM | | Well harrabyman, I think "ugly" is defined by people differently. To be blunt, if you go by what is considered conventional good looks, you don't fit that bill. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/18/2008 5:26:23 AM | | I guess I am....I am not attracted to heavier men at all, maybe its because of my size tho. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/18/2008 8:45:30 AM | Me myself, I don't like skinny men. I love a man with a little meat on there bones!  | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:19:15 AM | Im a bbw and I love men in general! I look at so much more then the physical.
Having said that there has to be a mutaul attraction .  | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:34:48 AM | "Me myself, I don't like skinny men. I love a man with a little meat on there bones!"
This is the common response and is hypocritical... see post 252. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/20/2008 10:39:29 AM | Cookies: I noticed that one too...
If someone's not attracted to a certain body-type, why do they feel the need to bash that body-type? Just say you "prefer" a man with a little cushioning. No need for "I don't like..." | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/20/2008 11:07:10 PM | I've always felt that men of any size/weight are okay, PROVIDED THAT THEY TAKE GOOD CARE OF THEMSELVES.
I have known men who have hanging guts, who aren't unattractive, but who do NOT take the time to wash properly, who have had bad odour, who have bad skin, etc, from eating so much junk... and it's a turn off for me.
I'm a fat gal, but I work hard to take good care of myself. I shower daily, I wash my hair daily, I wear clean clothes, I use good products (hair, makeup, anti-persperent, etc), and whatnot. I put EFFORT into my appearance. I don't think it's too much to ask any man, fat or thin, to take care of himself. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 2:02:36 AM | | as a rubenesque woman myself , I have dated slim men and one man who I couldnt put my arms around. Size wasnt an issue , it was the man himself that counted . Besides , I'm a sucker for nice eyes and a smile ...no size issues there . | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 2:28:33 AM | I don't care for the muscular or overweight guys.
Every guy I have dated has been a string bean and either really tall over 6 feet or really short under 5.6  | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 3:29:54 AM | Why is anyone judged as a hypocrite? Do skinny men like skinny women? Do fat men like fat women? Who cares? We are all have our attractions....can't really be helped.
I do believe that we can treat each other better though. Common courtesy is the rule. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 5:00:44 AM | Isnt it odd how big people say that looks dont matter !
Its not often you see a gorgeous woman with an ugly bloke or vice versa. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 5:36:24 AM | | ^^^^ Guess it depends on your neck of the woods. I see it all the time. Usually it is the gorgeous woman with the so-so guy or not even just so-so. | |
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mxk883
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Joined: 8/14/2007
Msg: 274 | |
| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 5:46:17 AM |
Usually it is the gorgeous woman with the so-so guy or not even just so-so...
I think in many cases $$$$ might have just a little to do with this...... | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/21/2008 5:52:18 AM | it's cold, but that's why us bbw come in handy. we keep you warm on those cold nights!
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