| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 5:56:51 AM | | I'm not surprised so many bbw's prefer the in shape, thin, or even average guys to the fat dudes like myself. I mean, last time I checked in shape attractive guys have a higher value in this society than fat guys. So yeah, there is some hypocrisy going on, but as long as they can attract these men you can't really blame them. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 6:32:52 AM | | The hypocrisy I guess is that our society doesn't look to kindly on fat people, but if you think you can attract a guy that isn't overweight more power to you. I'm gonna go out on a limb here though and guess it isn't the attracting part, but the keeping part that might hold some bbw's back when they look for guys who are in good shape. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 6:49:27 AM | | I have some problems in this area, the ladies all want photos, understandably, so do I. The ones who dont, are speaking of the inner beauty. They say you have to look on the inside to find it. Of course thats true, but why is that ok? I mean if the women ares hesitant to show a photo because of weight and ridicule the men who want pictures as being shallow, why is it ok for the slimmer women to insist on pictures and not be slammed. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 6:51:37 AM | Healthy...just gimme a healthy teddy bear anytime. lol
Mmmmmmmmm | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 7:39:36 AM | | I am not sure that the definiton of the word hypocrite applies to the question that is posed . If a woman has blonde hair and is attracted to men with brown hair is she a hypocrite? or if she likes tall men and is a short woman, or is a thin woman and likes large men. etc...my guess is that because so many deem a bbw as being unattractive that we should be attracted to men who others find unattractive? just a thought... | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 8:32:12 AM | | I'm not into "scrawy"...give me a man with meat on his bones lol | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 2:44:42 PM | | I don't care if he's skinny or fat, as long as he makes me feel safe, protected, and loved. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 4:13:29 PM | | Since bbw's want men to accept them for who they are, and look for men to "love me for being me, and not how I look," than yeah there is some hypocrisy going on when they also want a guy who is in shape. But like I said, if you can attract them and keep them more power too you. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 4:18:13 PM | Miss Mewsic...I read your post and I tend to differ what you wrote...I do believe YOU got it, but I look at life and the Universe like this=I am safe, protected and loved...NO ONE CAN DO THAT FOR ME...but myself...once I knew that...that was when I felt peace in my heart forever...it is the most beautiful feeling you can within...God like...
Nice words though Miss Mewsic, I use them all the time...
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 5:08:58 PM |
Since bbw's want men to accept them for who they are, and look for men to "love me for being me, and not how I look,"
Nope. I want a man who loves my brain, my personality, and my body and there are plenty of them out there. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 3/28/2009 5:10:30 PM | I don't think it's necessarily hypocritical to be attracted to someone of a different body type than you. When I was heavier, I was attracted to the same type of women I'm attracted to now that I've lost 70 pounds.
What would be hypocritical is for someone to whine about how people aren't attracted to them, and yet they have very strict physical preferences of their own. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/23/2009 10:39:36 AM | Interesting thread....My perspective has been over the last year with my health returning from a nasty pituitary problem and losing 80 of the excess weight over that period and feeling normal...
My only perspective is that as you get to a more normal weight, you get tons more attention from everybody including the heavier people.......What I find attractive hasnt really changed athough my expectations are higher...When I was heavier, I had a long-distance relationship with somebody from my past that was heavier....It really didnt work because she had emotional issues...and yeah, that appears to be a problem.... | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/23/2009 1:51:36 PM | | IDK if I fit in the BBW category however I like average to skinny men. I'm not AGAINST dating a bigger guy ... I just like them to be in the 6' range that weight between 180-250. I'm happy with my weight but I'll be happier when I finish my weight loss and I'd like a man to be right there with me. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/24/2009 10:24:05 AM | Oh no, I agree with you... there are limits. I had a huge mountain of a man....and loved there was so much to hold on to. He could pick me up and swing me around...wow... But I also went out with another man who was sloppy fat....and finallly got rid of him...would have sooner...but my son said I was being too picky. In the end they all agreed he was a slopppy, not very hygenic, rude person ( not that being heavy would have anything to do with personality).
But I do love big hunks of men..... hard to find ....but they do warm you up so well | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/24/2009 10:44:52 AM | | I don't think that there is any issue whatsoever in anyone being attracted to or not being attracted to anyone else. What does it matter if you are a big woman who only likes thin guys? Or vice versa? It's a big world and there is room for all of us in it. I doubt that we can change who and what we are attracted to just because it would be the correct thing to do...attraction is more visceral than that. So if a bbw is only attracted to in shape men, and that's all she dates, then so be it. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/24/2009 6:12:05 PM | Great post OP; it always cracks me up when people are not in shape or very large and then they insist on dating someone that is skinny or athletic.
People are very one sided in wanting what they want over what they are bringing to the table. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/24/2009 6:49:36 PM | Yeah, it's definitely hypocritical to want someone who is slimmer when you yourself are larger. It's easier to expect someone to take the time to maintain their body than to do so to your own body. There's a weird psychological thing going on, though. Generally, we want something not to impress ourselves but to impress those around us. Many people are perfectly fine living with larger bodies themselves, but want to be slimmer so that others don't think less of them. Obviously there are those that want to be thinner and fit as it's a major health issue and their concern is with themselves and not others.
However, liking someone who is slim when you are larger doesn't make you a hypocrite. You just happen to like them and they just happen to be large. If you went out of your way to only date slim people, then yeah, that's grade A hypocrite right there. If you find yourself wanting someone slimmer than you, maybe you should realise that you could be making change yourself.
Also, someone's physical appearance actually says a lot about their personality, interests, and so on. Obviously not right all the time, but it's a pretty decent indicator. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/25/2009 1:05:37 AM | | A person's weight and body type are merely parts of who they are as a person. If someone is a hypocrite if they are larger and date people who have a different body shape, then people who have long hair should date others with long hair, blondes should date blondes, brunettes should date brunettes, blue eyed people should date blue eyed people, tall people should date tall people, people with graduate degrees should date others with graduate degrees, people who earn 50K a year should date others who earn 50K a year, etc. yada yada yada. I never see anyone post threads saying "I have blonde hair and he has blonde hair and dates only brunettes or red heads so he is a hypocrite", or "She and I have the exact same income and level of education and she dates men who are not educated who make 20K so she is a hypocrite", etc. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/25/2009 7:49:42 PM | I have and will date overweight guys. I love a bigger man..makes me feel protected. Sure he must have pride in his appearance just as a slim guy does.
At this stage of life (I am 52) I am looking for waaaay more than a great body. Intelligence, kindness, honesty, addiction free, respectful are way more important than a belly. Besides I'm overweight too and would love someone to work out with and go for nice walks.
It saddens me to no end how cruel and phoney some people are on this site. It seems that society has used how much you weigh to measure you as a "good individual" instead of the whole package. I have thin friends who are nasty to men...makes me shake my head. I had a co-worker who was absolutely beautiful..married a professional football player here in Canada. He dumped her because after awhile he saw how high maintenance and cruel she was to overweight people. My friend did nothing but talk about herself and how every guy in the room wanted her. At a bar one night she kept mentioning how one guy kept staring over at our group. She figured he was just dying to ask her to dance..god forbid maybe one of the other in the group. Well he did march over, right past her and asked another friend of mine to dance. Boy was my friend angry. Figured she was above all of us and would be the only one getting asked to dance. Too funny.
I only wish people would give one another chances and meet to see if there is a connection instead of judging everyone's worthiness according to the number on the scale. I know I have tons to offer the right guy and am willing to work on a relationship equally with the man I love. I know lots of my friends are the same..but because we are all overweight and working on losing it we aren't considered worthy. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/25/2009 10:53:47 PM | | I'm sure there are women out there like this. I see mismatched couples skinny chick/fat guy and fat chick/skinny guy all the time. I don't think that in itself is a huge deal. I will say though that I believe women are pickier about the topic then men. That's just me though. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/25/2009 11:39:18 PM | I am a plus-size girl and I am typically not attracted to heavyset men. I prefer men that are tall (6 ft and taller) with an average or athletic build. If a man is too short/slender it makes me feel self-conscious to be with him.
Another point - just because I am plus-size myself, doesn't mean I don't take care of myself, have impeccable grooming habits, and the desire to make myself attractive to the opposite sex. It also doesn't always mean that I am less healthy than a slender person.
I don't think this makes me a hypocrit AT ALL. I am attracted to what I am attracted to. Is there some unwritten rule that overweight people can only mate with each other? Sorry, but I must have missed that one...
In the end I am most attracted to a man's smile, personality, sincerity, and nature, but physical attraction is still important at some level. Everyone has a right to be attracted to who they are attracted to. And as the saying goes... there is an @ss for every seat... | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/26/2009 5:30:58 AM |
Another point - just because I am plus-size myself, doesn't mean I don't take care of myself, have impeccable grooming habits, and the desire to make myself attractive to the opposite sex. It also doesn't always mean that I am less healthy than a slender person.
Very true - skinny doesn't equal healthy. I have known thin people who either eat terrible like cigarettes and coffee for breakfast, or they are sick constantly.
You can tell if a person has totally given up on themselves and it doesn't have a whole lot to do with weight unless they have gotten to the point of being immobile. I have a female married friend who in her 50s, doesn't wear makeup and I seldom see her with clean hair and won't pay $20 for a decent haircut. She wears bras with no support, has eyebrows that are out of control, yet she thinks it' the fact she's picked up weight makes her husband less attracted to her. I would love to see her have a makeover but I don't think she would maintain it. She constantly talks about losing weight but she isn't that big. There is a certain amount of maintainence that people have to put in their appearance regardless of their weight. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/26/2009 8:19:16 AM | I only wish people would give one another chances and meet to see if there is a connection instead of judging everyone's worthiness according to the number on the scale. I know I have tons to offer the right guy and am willing to work on a relationship equally with the man I love. I know lots of my friends are the same..but because we are all overweight and working on losing it we aren't considered worthy.
For me, it's not about judging someone based on their weight. It's about physical attraction. There is more to a person that just looks / weight. But there should be at least physical attraction in a romatic relationship. I know some signifcantly overweight / obese women who are very nice people. But I wouldn't date them because I'm usually not attracted to women with that body type.
As mentioned before, a BBW is not a hypocrite for being attracted to thin or athletic men. She would be hypocrite if she rejects short men, bald men, fat men, men from a certain race etc. AND she also complains about men not dating her due to her weight. | |
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| Any bbw hypocrites?
Posted: 4/26/2009 8:13:09 PM | Bigger guy is attractive as long as its proportion. Sorry big gut and chicken legs, I don't fine it attractive yet even distrubuted big guy, totally fine by me!!! Believe me, I love my big men, I am an equal oppurtunist.  | |
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