| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 11:35:43 AM | << thinking yet another reason that I'm glad I'm not a woman
I don't mind having sex on the first date, but you've just got to be smart about it. There's so many diseases and such out there. If you're really that hot for each other, why not just go down on each other? Sometimes that's just sexier anyway  | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 11:50:27 AM | hmmm thanks juz: You just gave me great inspiration for first date protocol. Get the men on their knees on the first date and leave them begging for more. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 1:35:47 PM | | Sometimes there is a physical attraction that is insane. It almost takes over....I like when that happens. Sex IS in fact great when its with the right person and if you have chemistry in some form. I believe in taking things as they come...if that means sex on the first date..so be it...(I do not think that just because you let your desires take control in a situation makes you a slut or a ho...or any less of a woman. It really is a matter of emotional, mental, and physical gratification..if it feels good to you and you are prepared for any consequences...give in..its sooo much fun!!! | |
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Jan762
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Joined: 9/26/2004
Msg: 30 | |
| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 2:18:21 PM | | Exactly who is the ho here? Come on lets call it like it really is. You guys that press for sex on the first dates are the ho's. Yes, you're the ho's. You might think you're a real stud for scoring on the first date but the bottom line is the real ho is you. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 2:23:25 PM | | I think sex is great...for a man or a woman. I dont think that just because you are giving into a desire should qualify you as a ho. I really wish that label would go away. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 3:50:06 PM | | SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE HASNT HAD IT FOR AWHILE,I NEVER TRIED TO GET A WOMAN TO PUT OUT ,ITS A MUTUAL THING.AS FOR BEING A HOE OR A STUD THATS A LABLE THAT PEOPLE PUT ON OTHER THAT HAVE ISSUES WITH THIER OWN SEXUALITY.WHATS SO WRONG WITH GETTING SOME LOVIN?WHEN YOUR IN THE MIDDLE OF SEX THERE IS NOTHING ELSE THAT MATTERS OR NO PLACE YOU WOULD RATHER BE. | |
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fay
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Joined: 7/29/2004
Msg: 33 | |
| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 6:18:24 PM | I f*** when I wanna f*** and if i wanna, I f*** like there is no tomorrow... then I play hard to get 
Fay | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 7:22:42 PM | Many people say "I don't play games in dating." If you don't go with what you feel at the moment, then you ARE playing games in dating.
A man once told me about a contest he and another man had when they were in their 20s and 30s. The contest was to sleep with the most number of women. Both of the men got upto something like 250 or 300. I remember thinking to myself - holy cow! that's a lot of women. In their contest, it only counted if they had sex on the first date. I suspect they rarely called the woman back after sex and probably broke a few hearts in the process.
However, that is just two men. Suppose that the average man has sex with 20 women in his lifetime and that those two men had 300 each (for easy calculating). 300 divided by 20 is 15. So each of those two men had the opportunity to make a bad or a good impressions with 15 times more women than the average man. Supposing they did not call back 80% of the 300 women they had one night stands with, each of the men managed to piss off 240 women. So there are 240 women out there perpetuating "sex is bad on the first date" myth.
If the man is available and looking for a relationship, it is common sense for a man to call a woman back after having sex for one simple reason. If the man doesn't call back, there is probably a reason - he is unavailable, either emotionally or he is in another relationship. Personally, I've always called back women after sex - it is easier to have sex in the future with a woman who has had sex with you already.
The reality is some men are looking for adventure and not looking for a relationship. If that is the case, have you really hurt yourself by having sex on the first night? Some men will already be in a relationship and will be looking for sex on the side. I've heard estimates that as many as half of the men in bars are married - who really knows.
If you are having a problem with men not calling you back after sex - you should 1) examine where you are meeting men (many men at bars and clubs are looking for excitement - not a relationship) 2) examine what is your criteria for sleeping with men (handsome, extroverted men are more likely to already be in a relationship), and 3) where are you having sex? (if you have sex at his place, you can make sure he isn't married and you can sleep over after sex). | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 9:08:29 PM | (Sometimes there is a physical attraction that is insane. It almost takes over....I like when that happens. Sex IS in fact great when its with the right person and if you have chemistry in some form.)
Shannon, I'll direct this at you, the chemistry that you talk about having.... Explain it to me.....I have had dates that it is more than just the normal attraction. It's literally electrifying, to the point where when you kiss or touch you can feel the energy... It has to be two people that understand themselves and allow the energy to happen. All people can do it but most don't know how to use it..... Find that and you cannot keep off of each other... First date or otherwise...... There are books about it... Search Ebay Or Barnes and Nobles...Energy Medicine is one I konw..... If you don't already know how to use it you should read up on it.... I think that you will find out that it's worth your time..... The rest of you do the same it's the same for a man as it is a woman.....It is some MIND BLOWING stuff if you can find a partner that is in it with you.... It's not drugs it's learning how to control the energy in your own body...... ENJOY! | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 9:15:01 PM | | I would apprecaite it if more of you women would have sex with me on the first date and then throw me away.. Can I be the one to put the notch in your belt? he he | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 9:29:04 PM | You guys that press for sex on the first dates are the ho's.
I agree. Pressing for sex is bull! It shows the Chemistry is not mutually there. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 10:02:02 PM | | Soba...chemistry basically (to me) means exactly what youve described and I'll have to check ou what youre talking about (the books) THANKS!!!!! | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/21/2004 10:27:27 PM | Shannon, Whne it;s there you know it and noting is safe..... days and week and months go by.... you really get to see what going for days is like.....LOL
Enjoy | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/22/2004 8:03:12 AM | Why is it so bad to have sex on the first date ???
I have had sex on the first date, told the guy I would call and never called. I have also been told that I would get a call ... and no call came. I have also had a few first dates where there has been no sex whatsoever ... no chemistry. And then I have had a few first dates where there was chemistry but no intercourse, kissing, oral sex - yes.
What is chemistry - its exactly what soba said ... there is this electrifying tingle that runs through your bodies, and you just can't keep your hands to yourself!
And as for the guys thinking a girl is a whore because she "puts out" on the first date ... you are no better. The double standard is just wrong. If I want to have casual sex, a one night stand or multiple encounters thats my choice. No one else's business. And just because a chic "puts out" on the first date with you doesn't mean she does it with everyone. Maybe you caught her on a night when she was extremely horny, maybe you caught her on a long period of abstinence, or maybe she just likes sex. Women have just as many needs as men.
Prime example. I have a friend that sleeps with as many women as possible. His friends are the same way. When they found out that I like to have my fun just as they do, they immediately labelled me. Whats the difference???? I am doing the same thing as they are!! Ok well not quite the same way ... I don't go out everynight and sleep with a different guy whereas they go out every night and sleep with a different woman.
Personally I say, if the mood is right, go for it. And as for the "chase" being lost ... why does it have to be lost? You can still chase the sex ... just make the sex better. "Chase" different avenues to have sex, that can be just as thrilling!!! | |
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Rinet
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Joined: 10/1/2004
Msg: 42 | |
| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/22/2004 10:11:34 PM | | When we are talking about sex on first night it obviously means that both had talked about it and sometimes situation enhances sex; depends on how long they have waited. Sometimes first meeting turns into sex because of the thirst originated by love, soetimes its casual, sometimes it is the test of compitability whether they would match or not, because talks is not a proven ability, so how they are syncronized first date sex is appreciable. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/22/2004 10:18:35 PM | Rinet,
I completely agree with you, I talked with a friend for about 7 years and always talked about meeting but it never seem to work out right, SHe was seeeing some one I was or something to that effect. In march of 2003 we were both single and not seeeing anyone and we met for the first time in those 7 years..... and I have got to say the was the BEST MIND BLOWING sex either one of us ever had.... and I have been with a number of women and this was totaly AWESOME...... So it DOES depend on how long a person has known some one..... and don't get me wrong... there are others out there that have no problem with having sex on the first date.... But That is up to them, is it wrong...... How can anyone say that it is or that it is not... we are not to judge others,,,, it is for some and not for others..(please don't misunderstand that I don't mean that your taking sides) | |
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Ruby_
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Joined: 7/10/2004
Msg: 44 | |
| about sex on the first night
Posted: 10/23/2004 6:46:17 AM | It is about the chemistry you share with that certain someone that makes having sex with them person on the first night ok if you want to do it.
Obviously you don't have sex every first date you ever have, the sexual attraction has to be there.
I still maintain that if a woman wants to have sex the first night this is her business and she shouldn't be frowned upon. Men don't have a problem so why should we women get pummeled for it.
This is great how the thread now has a life of its' own. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:27:29 PM | In the old days, sex on the first date was the equivilent of sex with a stranger. But today, it's possible to have an online relationship for months, and get along very well.
So, by the time you actually meet face to face, things are so hot you have sex on the first date.
Is that equivilent to meeting someone at a club and having sex that night?
Bob | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:39:13 PM | I could never respect a guy who'd sleep with me on the first night I've met him.
I'm not going to say I've never done it...but I sure as shyt didn't respect him for it. It's not like he would be relationship material. That kind of sex is for kicks, for fun, for games and for hedonistic pleasure.
But hey, he wanted to get off and so did I. Always got confused by the ones who wanted to "do that again". It's like test driving the same car over and over again, what's the point, I'm not buying the darn thing! Pffft...go away.
I can have sex with someone and not care one iota about them. It's like having a body to masturbate with. Qu'est sera, sera...
I've grown up since then. I now realize that humans aren't toys and that being a woman of the world isn't all it's cracked up to be. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:52:22 PM | | If/when that situation ever arises (pardon the pun), I don't plan on it (though I can't honestly say I know for certain how I'll reaction or what the situation will be) and would rather spend time getting to know someone and be close to them intellectually and emotionally - sex is just sex without further accompanying feelings, and I have no interest in that. | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:55:22 PM | I don't have casual sex.... but iwith the right person I guess i Could have sex on the first date.... | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 3/7/2007 8:23:06 PM | there are no rules in dateing and sex, just knowing how to play yer hand! lol
literaly | |
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| about sex on the first night
Posted: 3/8/2007 6:36:37 AM | | If you have sex because the chemistry is right then that's fine but be prepared that it won't last...chemistry based sexual relationships don't last because once you stop for long enough to get to know the person you may find that you don't click personality ways and if you can't click with someone on a personality level then it won't last. | |
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