| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/21/2009 6:51:38 PM | "Drama queens" are people who turn small issues into "big deals." They "fly off the handle", "make federal cases" at little things. They are often easily offended. They seem to thrive on the negative emotion. "Centered, peaceful, well adjusted, self-controlled, thoughtful" are qualities that nobody would accuse them of. Who wants to be with a drama queen? Except another one, perhaps.
Some of us here have lived with drama queens and have no desire to repeat it. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/21/2009 8:10:53 PM | | There's no such thing as a "no drama" person (unless you are talking about a robot) so lets say "minimal drama". Everyone gets upset sometimes but some people take the little things way too far. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/21/2009 8:25:13 PM | | I think....personally, that everyone has drama in their life to a certian degree. I'd like to see someone who has led the perfect life and has no drama. In every conversation with a new date always comes up past. Its just normal to know the type of person you are to know how you were in the past. It doesnt mean its drama. Now... if you have current problems with something from your past, ya thats drama. If you have issues that your working on, ie: an ex, then you should work that out before attempting to date. As that can really affect a relationship and cause it to fail. That hurts especially when its someone your really into. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/24/2009 4:24:21 PM | | Thanks for posting this! I've wondered the same thing? It's not realistic to expect no drama in life. That be a perfect world and as we know it this world and life is not perfect. It's how one handles it, confronts it rather then running from it. There is growth and something to be learned. I really question the maturity level of these guys! | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/24/2009 7:56:17 PM | I think drama and baggage is different for everyone. Here is my definition.
1. Must understand that I'm not like the "other " guys she's dated in the past.
We've all had relationships that ended badly, but we don't wanna hear how all men are jerks. Take a break until your ready to jump back in with both feet and take a chance.
2. If you have children we understand the childs father will be in the picture, and should be. But we don't want to hear about him all the time, whether it's good or bad.
3. Can pay her bills.
4. Has her own vehicle, or at least a way to get arround. I don't mind helping out, but don't want to end up being her personal taxi.
I can't speak for all guys, but I'm pretty sure this is what they think to. As for the comments from the guys you asked, some people just never grow up.
I want a woman who will speak her mind and let me know how she feels., and so do alot of other guys | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/24/2009 9:08:43 PM | | I have to tell you first that I'm 29, but close enough to 30 to understand completely. The thing is that (and I hope no one takes any offense) guys like me who are still single at this age have probably noted a steady decline in the sanity of the women we date. It makes sense right? Too much drama, too much craziness, drunk girls, wild girls, stupid girls, melodramatic girls, etc. etc. I'm not saying we guys are any better, but I know very clearly that if I could date a girl with the semblance of rationality that my high school and college girl friends had, I would be in love immediately. Take what I say with a grain of salt. I'm just trying to make a point. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/25/2009 12:13:36 PM | Drama free means discipline and not loosing it over petty issues.Or the ex controls her every thought and motion.Or her friends tell her how to deal with her BF.Or the GF's wanna have a go with the BF.Been threw that to many times.Its not all just one drama issue,it cover a broad range.And you wanna bash men,I have met ALOT of women with these issues.Put MANY an ex in his place and they both didnt like.Moral to the story is,if you dish it out,you dam sure better be able to take it.This is my motto,you respect me.You will get it in return,if not.Be prepared,its coming back at ya.Life is to short to play games or put up with uncalled for BS.  | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/25/2009 2:28:13 PM | If I were to use "Drama free" as a criteria, to me it would mean
-No past psychological issues that would later be pinned on to me as the cause - I was raped/abused/cheated on by someone and you look like him. I can't look at you and not think of that person *cry* (True story)
-Aren't looking for someone that will "Daddy" them because they haven't decided to grow up yet (You want me to spank you because you're having a temper tantrum for me not getting you what you want?) (I don't mind the occasional playing, but when it's an actual tantrum for me not spoiling them, I'm out of there)
-Doesn't have an ex that is going to hunt me down. I understand people have pasts, we all do, it's our life experiences that make us who we are. When those past experiences come back and can hurt me, then I might have an issue.
-Have an STD and not willing to tell your partners because "they might not love you anymore".
-Not willing to share my time with my children. I have a son, he gets time with me. It can't all be yours. I'm not asking for a mother to my child. He has one. You don't even have to be his friend, just be respectful of the fact that he's important to me.
But, if you can be a mature person and just be honest, then by all means, lets talk.
This is just my list and interpretation though. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/25/2009 8:46:57 PM | hahaha I was away for a bit - Im back and yall havent disappointed me!
Hilarious some of you - in a funnybone way - ridiculous some others - in an unrealistic expectation way - but I am really happy to see you enjoying the post.
It has proved to be most enlightening for me!
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/26/2009 3:42:04 AM | If you get an honest answer off people off the net id be impressed.
Ive a radar for nutters its gets boring when the women you love walks out the door and a completely different person walks in .Depression seems to be a huge issue with the human race .But im sure doctors dont say to someone with cancer i see why you fcked up youre husbands life having cancer!.But depression which must be awful to have doesnt give people
free rain to act like arseholes. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/26/2009 9:56:29 AM | From my perspective...what "no drama means is anything that is going to either put my kids at risk (Im a single parent), divert resources away from my kids, or generally make my life more hectic and complex than it already is. Those things to me generally have shown a person to be unreliable in the past.
And, yes....I've dealt with some drama....or BS...or just off the wall lunacy..whatever you want to call it:
A girl waited to tell me until RIGHT BEFORE we were going to be intimate that she had Hep C and a psycho truck drive hubby who wouldn't give her a divorce, so she just decided to give herself a common law divorce (WTF?!?!?)
A girl who would only say she had a lot of legal bills...but never wanted to elaborate...but she sure wasn't shy about asking me to pitch in...dont think so!!
The list goes on and on.....
When I say no drama...I mean someone I can spend time with at the end of the day and not have to hear about a never ending series of crises every single moment of every day....you girls know the types Im talking about....and there are people out there...men and women who simply will no grow up and make decisions based on maturity....and they almost always end up in a bad place and want someone else to pick up the pieces....
Im simply too old for that crap. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/26/2009 9:48:33 PM | Simple answer :
As we get older, making a big deal about nothing in life is just nonsense. That's what men see as drama. There are more important things to worry about than "what he said, what she said". We hate soap operas, and that's the kind drama we run from, it enriches no-one. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/27/2009 12:29:43 PM | I'm going to agree with KINKY**stard.
Why men over 30 are drama shy is probably because they had enough! But to say that a man doesn't want drama from a woman isn't being realistic in life, because as Kinky**stard's comments "Fights, disagreements, conflict etc, are all part and parcel of Life." "But there is such a thing as over playing issues that are:
a) Trivial.
b) Cannot be changed (at least not over night)."
For men to resolve non issues from drama from a woman, don't date and don't get into relationships, or get yourself into a love shop and get yourself a doll that doesn't talk back, that you don't have to emotionally reciprocate, that can't have kids for you to support. Problem solved LOL. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/27/2009 3:35:20 PM | It's secret code for "I'm really an unsupportive man"...If you have any problem in your life I don't wanna talk about it and I'm not gonna help you....It is an overused term...I will be glad when the trendy use of it drops...We have a brainless society sometimes that is selfish and jumps on the trendy labeling bandwagon and will use this term of "no drama" until it is ragged and worn and will be glad when it turns into dust....I'm glad to see some wisen up to the use of it...
There can be some issues that REALLY ARE DRAMA...the small issues blown out of proportion and I know that may be why the labeling started, but some guys and gals have jumped on the band wagon and abused this term...It's become secret code for "shut up and don't talk...I just wanna have sex with you...i have no use for u as a human being and could care less about your life"...
Supportive men are getting few and far between..it's gettin scary out there...
These guys that dodge drama may have a closet full of skeletons too... | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/28/2009 11:09:00 AM | Drama to me means:
- that you have issues with an X
- family interferes with your life
- whining alot
- have a habit of lieing and manupulating ppl
- bashing your friends all the time
- talking about your work stress constantly
- very negative outlook
- immature
I recently made contact with a girl that i met online and after ten minutes of talking to her, she was like pressure cooker awaiting to go off. Everything i listed above is what she spoke about, i couldn't take anymore. As i was saying bye, she was still rambling on..lol | |
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boo372
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Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 193 | |
| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/28/2009 12:55:02 PM | | I would guess they mean, constant bs happening over and over and over. Much like a soap opera. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/28/2009 1:10:14 PM |
Supportive men are getting few and far between..it's gettin scary out there...
Do some women still think of us men as Mr “Fix It All" guys?
I'm all up for supporting my woman as best as I can, but there are LIMITS to what I can do. I can't run my woman's Life for her. And I certainly expect her to support herself mentally, emotionally, financially etc.
But of course, when the tough gets going, I'll be there as a friend, as a companion... And it's been in my experience that relationships based on a genuine friendship, tend to last longer anyway.
But we all know even friends have their limits too.
No... Men cannot fix everything... Welcome to the Real World... And if some women out there react badly to this plain and simple fact (as has been the case with a couple of my past girlfriends) then all sorts of unnecessary drama begins.
Drama is part of Life unfortunately... But who the heck wants drama 24/7?
I thought having relationships was meant to be all about happiness... Or am I missing something here? | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/28/2009 1:20:59 PM | No Drama = no fighting or extended arguments; no outside influences bringing down our relationship; maturity and knowing the difference between the petty things and the important things.
No drama means no unnecessary turmoil. I have met women who like turmoil in their everyday life. They don't appreciate calmness. I'm there are men who are the same way. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/28/2009 6:10:54 PM | If being with you, or trying to be with you causes me more stress, anxiety, tedium vs the fun factor; then you are drama.
Theres an excellent crazy to hot XY graph out there, some concessions will be made for a hot girl, that wont be made for the girl next door; but when you hit the axis, requardless, you are OUT.
Dropped faster than biohazard waste in a buffet line.
the no drama mantra is the same as the 'laid back' down to earth, easy going typ thing you always see, right next to long walks on the beach! I guess we all live in coastal/riverine locations; must suck to try and get a date in Kansas! | |
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| No Drama = Unsupportive Man
Posted: 8/28/2009 7:46:54 PM |
It's secret code for "I'm really an unsupportive man".
Wrong. It means we don't like women (or anyone for that matter) who continually go haywire with small issues. Drama queens seem to thrive on the negative attention and energy. Having problems and facing them is not the problem. It's the manner in which way they are faced that marks some people as "drama queens." The words "emotionally mature and well adjusted" would apply to the opposite of a drama queen. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/30/2009 7:21:12 AM | Among the knights in shining armour that I know, when they get involved with a woman who has drama (rescue a damsel in distress) the relationship struggle for them isn't the drama, it's constantly being made to pay for the sins of the men before. I've heard them talk about wanting no drama, but these heroes actually thrive on it, rescue is their purpose, heroic feats, their destiny. They look for drama even if they say otherwise.
Men who demand NO DRAMA, may just be tired, but, I work with the macho men of the planet and very very few women, most of whom are either the "butch" type or get accused of it, at the least, we are told that we are more men than the men we work with. So the men speak freely around me, and the bottom line is this, most of the men who say they hate women who are filled with drama also report stories of a their women freaking out on them- the story has the guy pulling over the top BS and being utterly unaccountable for it. Like cheating with their GF's sister or like raiding her bank account/credit card for a big screen TV, like the guys puking all over the house and car after a major football guys only party - for the fourth time. Man, they just hate spoiled beeches like that.
Here on PoF, No drama means the kids, if they exist, are not seen and not heard and no exes are ever mentioned. The sexual relationship is "open" but not in terms where two people communicate like adults, you are exclusive to him and he gets to do what he wants. You never need money from him and though he may spend all his free time at your place, all expenses and chores are yours and if you could buy him a 18 pack now and then every night, you're a keeper. You can't drive his car but his teenage son can drive yours. His teenage son is spoiled rotten by him and is now kicked out of mom's for being just like dad but it's not his fault, but the second your child comes in with some drama, jeebus, can't you handle that kid?
Very little of the above happened to me, it's all male confession, laughing and guiltless. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/31/2009 3:31:09 PM | | I'm not sure what guys mean when they say that, but I have had co-workers who were my age or better and they could bring more drama than my teenaged daughter and her friends in the schoolyard. I'm with the guys on this one, it is no fun having to constantly pull someone down off the ceiling for something silly...because when something serious does happen, I've no energy left to deal with it. | |
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| Why Are Men Over 30 Drama Shy?
Posted: 8/31/2009 5:27:58 PM | let me tell you ...there are weirdos...10 crazy men...and one descent men
it is a waste of time...but in this pond...we are selective
just accept what you can offer
you are smart
you are warm loving
you work...have your own place
you are able to take care of your children
you are happy...no major issues
no drama...want a quiet life
all those criteria...your partner should have...good luck | |
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