| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/7/2009 5:33:17 PM | All the re, re, re re banter can seem like a waste of time, however, when you finally decide to have that drink, and HE cant be bothered getting out of HIS comfort zone, you can sigh, smile, and say to yourself... lucky me. Didnt want a couch potato anyway.
hahaha. still laughing. | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/8/2009 5:50:12 AM | Let's be honest, well are all fussy when it comes to the sort of person we would consider for a relationship, which is as it should be, being with the wrong person is not going to add joy to our life. Men just seem to have separate categories of requirements for those they will shag and those that they want a relationship with. You don't have to meet many standards to be shag-able but you have to meet a hell of a lot of standards to be relationship worthy.
Personally I wouldn't have sex with anyone I would not consider relationship material, and possibly more women are like this than men are. It would appear that some men will shag anything as long as it has a pulse (and according to some news articles even that is not essential). Sure they will have a relationship with the right woman but in the meantime they are happy to shag all the women who will let them.
Just remember you are better off alone than with the wrong person. | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/8/2009 6:14:08 AM |
Sure they will have a relationship with the right woman but in the meantime they are happy to shag all the women who will let them.
Yes, and if one must scratch those itches while waiting for Mr/Ms Right to come along, then I guess one just has to find someone that is Good Enough For Now.
"Oh, I couldn't live a single day without you
Actually, on second thought, well, I suppose I could
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, honey, you're the greatest
Well, at any rate, I guess you're pretty good
Now, it seems to me I'm relatively lucky
I know I probably couldn't ask for too much more
I honestly can say you're an above average lady
You're almost just what I've been looking for
You're sort of everything I ever wanted
You're not perfect, but I love you anyhow
You're the woman that I've always dreamed of
Well, not really, but you're good enough for now
You're pretty close to what I've always hoped for
That's why my love for you is fairly strong
And I swear I'm never gonna leave you, darlin'
At least 'til something better comes along
'Cause you're sort of everything I ever wanted
You're not perfect, but I love you anyhow
You're the woman that I've always dreamed of
Well, not really, but you're good enough for now
No, not really, but you're good enough for now"
Lyrics for the song, 'Good Enough For Now'
by Weird Al Yankovic | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/8/2009 6:54:17 AM | I'm not in love, so don't forget it.
It's just a silly phase I'm going through.
And just because I call you up,
Don't get me wrong, don't think you've got it made.
I'm not in love, no no, it's because...
I like to see you, but then again,
That doesn't mean you mean that much to me.
So if I call you, don't make a fuss -
Don't tell your friends about the two of us.
I'm not in love, no no, it's because...
I keep your picture upon the wall.
It hides a nasty stain that's lying there.
So don't you ask me to give it back.
I know you know it doesn't mean that much to me.
I'm not in love, no no, it's because...
Ooh, you'll wait a long time for me.
Ooh, you'll wait a long time.
I'm not in love, I'm not in love...
10CC | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/8/2009 7:49:08 AM |
Might call you "mutton dressed up as lamb" though!
Sheesh . . good one Pete.
In that one line you've simultaneously insulted the OP, alienated every woman on the site and probably ended any chance of being taken seriously . . but hey.
I think an apology is in order, don't you?
But back to the topic . .
I think a lot of these threads have some common themes, but I'd say . . .
Don't allow yourself to become all consumed with not being in the relationship.
Allow yourself to be content with yourself particularly, and life in general.
Allow yourself and the 'potential' men to make some mistakes.
Make a list of the qualities you're looking for in a guy . . and actually write them down. I'm not thinking you woud use them as a basis for an interview, but writing them down does reinforce the standard and qualities you're looking for.
If all that fails, there's always Tequila.  | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/8/2009 8:03:59 AM | ^^^ God, I feel like I've arrived late to a party and everyone is already up to the drunk singing stage. Ya done Khe Sanh yet?
It would appear that some men will shag anything as long as it has a pulse
Now we have to have a pulse too? Jeez is there no end to the list of demands men place on us. It might be harder to find a woman with a pulse than you think...the twenty-somethings have stopped their blood flow in its tracks with full leg tourniquets they call "skinny jeans", and the thirty-somethings have pretty much constricted all normal heart function with push up bras...not a lot of circulation going on in the average woman under 40.
Well...*cough*....I was really only lured in here by all the singing.
Edit: Just read Faux Pa's post...hadn't noticed that comment of Pete's. That's called flaming Pete, twice to the one person, entirely instigated by you...why are you trolling Pookie? | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/9/2009 1:37:17 AM | Hey Juanba
All the re, re, re re banter can seem like a waste of time, however, when you finally decide to have that drink, and HE cant be bothered getting out of HIS comfort zone, you can sigh, smile, and say to yourself... lucky me. Didnt want a couch potato anyway.
hahaha. still laughing.
Hi i totally agree with you on that one
I admit i am the couch potato , but in my defence i only do it part time :) | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 12:56:51 AM |
I know it comes as a shock to some men but equality HAS been achieved , not just in the workplace but in what WE expect from a man .
So these expectations are????
Come on give us men a list of them then, might save a lot if we knew what was expected of us to begin with.
Doubt if men have any expectations of woman.
Or do we???
Any one game to put a list up ???? | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 4:28:46 AM |
Any one game to put a list up ????
Must I ??? ......OK then .....
1. You will be in charge of cooking, cleaning, yard work and putting the wheelie bins out
2.Picking up the dog poo's out of the yard will be your job.
3.You will never want to go out with your mates.
4.You will happily allow me to go out with my mates.
5. You will make me tea in bed in the mornings.
6.You will not expect me to give out after making my tea.
7. You will not expect me to give out at all, you will give out only when I want it and never hassle me for it inbetween times.
8.You will pick me up at 3am when I have gone out and gotten drunk with my friends.
9 You will constantly tell me how stunning I am and always tell me my bum looks small in those jeans.
10. In fact you will do what I want, when I want and how I want without question and will never whinge about it.
Im sure theres lots more but that will do for starters! | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 5:33:08 AM |
1. You will be in charge of cooking, cleaning, yard work and putting the wheelie bins out
2.Picking up the dog poo's out of the yard will be your job.
3.You will never want to go out with your mates.
4.You will happily allow me to go out with my mates.
5. You will make me tea in bed in the mornings.
6.You will not expect me to give out after making my tea.
7. You will not expect me to give out at all, you will give out only when I want it and never hassle me for it inbetween times.
8.You will pick me up at 3am when I have gone out and gotten drunk with my friends.
9 You will constantly tell me how stunning I am and always tell me my bum looks small in those jeans.
10. In fact you will do what I want, when I want and how I want without question and will never whinge about it.
hmm lets see lol
1. dont mind doing the cooking, some of the cleaning, yard work, and am happy to take the bins out
2. isnt that part of the yard work??
3. hmmm that one could be difficult...but i dont drink so i wont go to the pub with them lol
4. no issues with that one
5. this could be a tough one lol....people have sworn off coffee and tea when i have made it for them lol (i dont drink it so i dont make it well lol)
6. hehe wouldnt be too much different from my ex wife lol so i am used to that bit
7. refer to number 6
8. no problems with that one lol
9. definitely no problems with this one
10. no whinging....hmm does this mean i cant whinge to you but it is ok to whinge to my work mates about it?? if so then that is ok lol | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 10:01:07 AM | I wonder if women in their 40's want a relationship??
I am just turned 41 a few months ago.. and seriously after being on this site for just a few weeks I am not sure what I want!!!
There are so many choices.. I can have dating with or without sex, I can just have sex, I can have a long term relationship with or without sex.. I can even talk/email AND have sex as well.. I am sooooooo spoiled for choice...
I have to admit that as a woman that has been on my own for awhile I am getting used to it.. having the bed to myself.. sleeping at times I want.. and being an artist.. I can paint when I want.. with a partner that is harder because I have to think of them.. 'sigh' I guess I can't have it all...
Seriously I would love a part time relationship... is that possible? Does that make me evil or bad? Whatever happened to doing what makes you happy .. as long as you dont hurt anyone else and are honest about it..
So that means if a man doesn't want a relationship and he is honest about it.. does that make him bad?? Just because it doesn't suit us women? Nah I don't think so
If I just want to go out and have casual relationships and have sex when I want to with whom I want to and not hurt anyone in the process.. does that make me a bad person if I am open about? ( And no I am not saying that is what I want) But it seems to me its all about choices.. Ultimately we only have ourselves to answer to.. or do we?
Ok its 3am and I am rambling now.. those deep deep philosophical thoughts always raise their ugly heads around this time..
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 10:37:35 AM |
1. You will be in charge of cooking, cleaning, yard work and putting the wheelie bins out
2.Picking up the dog poo's out of the yard will be your job.
3.You will never want to go out with your mates.
4.You will happily allow me to go out with my mates.
5. You will make me tea in bed in the mornings.
6.You will not expect me to give out after making my tea.
7. You will not expect me to give out at all, you will give out only when I want it and never hassle me for it inbetween times.
8.You will pick me up at 3am when I have gone out and gotten drunk with my friends.
9 You will constantly tell me how stunning I am and always tell me my bum looks small in those jeans.
10. In fact you will do what I want, when I want and how I want without question and will never whinge about it.
1. Well I prefer my cooking, then I know what it is! Yard work was fixed with a watering can and 500ml of ZERO. Bins are good.
2. Oops, looks like the dog ran away. End of problem.
3. Nah, the boys are coming over HERE now we have the big TV
4. Good, the game is on soon. Have a good time
5. Well I'm making one, might as well be two.
6. All good, there was that drunken sex we had last night at 3am when you got in
7. Well the sleeping pills are working. Warm and a pulse works for me.
8. Why not, otherwise we don't get 6 above and your friends might be up for it too.
9. Well if you know men then you know we are prepared to lie for some peace and quiet.
10. Yes dear. | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 4:25:58 PM | 1. restraunts, apartment, cleaner
2. balcony, splat
3. what mates, you scared them off by making me wear the rubber suit
4. hurry up the cleaners coming over
5. Tea? theres a perfectly good bottle of scotch there!
6. oh look the cleaners back
7. and the cleaner isnt frigid
8. 3.am taxi........
9. always stunning with that tazer in your hand, and ive never tried your jeans on?
10. only after you have screamed (in pleasure that is)
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/10/2009 5:28:45 PM | Maudeath you have certainly hit the nail on the head there.
Women are more fussy when it comes to who they find bangable than men but men are far more picky, fussy when it comes to whether you are relationship worthy.
For myself I don't wish to be anyone's friend with benefits neither am I looking for a husband, somewhere between the two is what I would like.
In my humble opinion and it is my opinion - Men still think that they are as attractive to the opposite sex in their 40's and onwards as they were in the fresh flush of youth, a lot of guys seem to feel that they can still cut it with 25 year old young women and for a lot who claim to have no baggage where have they hidden it? Anyone who has had a serious relationship, has kids, is divorced or whatever carries some.
I have only just rejoined this site after a break and I have noticed that the same guys that were on here 2 years ago are still alone and advertising themselves.
Anyway that's my tuppenceworth. | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/11/2009 12:42:47 AM |
with a partner that is harder because I have to think of them.. 'sigh'
really?? we do???? dammit.... that in itself sounds like too much effort to me. and I wont be doing any lists,will leave that up to the more imaginative, relationship seeking individuals.... ...
love a part time relationship... is that possible?
anything is possible if you find someone who wants the same thing..... just establish the wants and dont wants from the start and there shouldnt be any dramas.. nice and easy and no expectations or 5 year plans | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/11/2009 1:22:23 AM | Doubt if men have any expectations of woman.
Or do we???
Any one game to put a list up ???
OK, time for a list from a man...
1. I don't want the perfect woman - but I especially don't want a woman who thinks she is perfect
2. Allow me to be a man - in fact, demand it.
3. Don't expect me to think like a woman, I can't.
4. If you don't know how to fix it - ask for my help.
5. When I tell you how hot you look in that dress, or how good your bum looks in those jeans, smile and appreciate the compliment, I mean it.
6. If you are employed that's great. If not that's fine too. Just remember it's a partnership.
7. Put the toilet lid down.
8. Don't expect me to recite poetry and read Plato on a daily basis.
9. I will probably like your dog, but if I regularly wake up with dog hair on the pillow I am out of there.
10. If you can't use the mute button for the loud Harvey Norman ads, give me the remote.
Caramello-kam - Some of us definitely do want a relationship, not friends with benefits, not a mate, not a mother, and not a dependent. Life partner, friend, lover - companionship, growing old together. | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/11/2009 3:02:35 AM | perhaps before u go on the meet u should clarify the stance of the man... if ur meeting off the net that is.. most men want a nookie first then relationship later if they are hit with a bang...
but what ur describing isnt really any different to any other person out there.. i think it purely comes down to.. when u met the one.. uve met the one.. like ahhh.. thats natural right, u rejected a few right. when a man says he doesnt want a relationship he means he doesnt want one with u... no one (very rarely) says no to someone that makes them vavooommm on the inside.. men when they are taken.. are taken (by someone).. simple.
possibly just focus on meeting ppl and making friends even a nookie or two if u want.. as u said ur a big girl... but think with the 'when its meant to be, its meant to be' motto..
plus read 'he's just not that into u' read not watch.. awesome book in understanding men a little better. | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/12/2009 4:52:38 PM | Caramello - Wasn't being too serious, didn't take it personally. I took your list as a joke, as mine was (mostly) intended. I do have a life, thanks for the suggestion. All forums aren't funny - some are heart breaking, have a look in the broken hearts or single parents forums.
You're posts eg "There looking for f*** buddies or one night stands. The ones our age have to much baggage and are set in their ways." suggest a negative attitude to men in general, was trying to encourage you that it isn't always so.
Sorry if I upset you, wasn't intending it to be a personal affront, just trying to have some positive input.  | |
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| Do Men in their 40's Want a relationship, YES A RELATIONSHIP ? A real One !!!
Posted: 7/13/2009 2:17:11 AM |
Fair enough, tone is a difficult thing to communicate with only text and it is often misinterpreted
mis interpreted way to easy in the forums so it seems.... maybe instead of trying to put a "tone" to it.. being the written word... maybe it should just be read as it is.. not attempting to read between the lines or add ones individual connotations to it.
maybe thats where some go wrong when putting so much empathasis onto "relation ships" adding their own connotations and not just accepting someone as they are while u are both getting to know each other and to see if there is a basis for anything to form into something more . It all takes time but I suppose with the world we live in.. everyone is in a rush and appear to want it all now. ( note: there is no tone included in the above transcript) | |
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