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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/3/2009 9:38:03 AM | I don't date people who sleep with animals! Problem solved.
I don't think the horses will be as territorial. However, you don't sound like you know much about horses. They are to be respected but try not to show your fear, they will sense it. Just keep in mind that they can bite and kick, even with their front hooves.
No sudden movements! Read up on horse behavior. Do your homework!
Offer them treats, (ask your friend what they like and come armed). Pet them and stroke their nose, mane or neck... act like you like them! | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:13:47 AM |
So who is training the human? The Dog?...... ......But if you believe your dog trained you, I wont argue with you.
Sorry to beat a dead off topic post to death.
You can change dog to dogs (plural), and yes! Over the last 50+ years, each and every canine companion I have had the pleasure of being guardian to, has taught me just a little more. They taught me how to interpret the silent and sometimes vocal language of the species, and what is expected of the guardian. The vicious ones taught me compassion for how they had been raised by a previous owner. The skittish ones taught me how to adjust my own attitude and approach, based on their fears. The ones that were afraid of lightning and thunder taught me how to understand those fears, and overcome that. The ones that had a killer instinct if a chicken decided to fly, taught me about ingrained instincts, and how to work on creating an environment that was less in tune with those primordial instincts.
I trained my dog, and I'm quite sure he has not trained me to do any tricks yet.
If you believe that you have not been trained to do any tricks, try to forget to feed your dog, or neglect to take it for the daily walk. Does your dog tell you when the water bowl is empty? Does it tell you when it needs to go outside for natural purposes? Do you respond in a positive manner? Guess what? You have been trained to slight degree, even if you don't realize it.
OK, so on topic, just so I don't get chastized by the mods yet again (conditioning  ), the OP should aproach the stallions as he does anything else unknown to him. Allow yourself to be introduced, and then offer a peace token. A slice of apple works very well, as you can place it in an open palm, face up. A carrot offered in the tips of your fingers is an invitation to have your fingers shortened. Any gesture through the bars of the fence could result in having a wrist or arm broken, so make sure your peace offering is on your side of the fence, or at a minimum, over the top rail. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:20:38 AM | i rented out a horse farm once, when i was in transition and trying to sell my house to move to a new long term "salaried" position, to turn a place around that was in strategic trouble. i let animal rescue type people use the barns and corals and rented out a room to one of them. i knew nothing about horses, but, in many ways, they remind me of huge dogs. they love apples, btw!
i had to get one up from colic one night and walk him around for hours. no cell phone back then, but i had directions via the phone. man, was that an experience. went to my board meeting the next day "exhausted". but, he made it! glad he didn't crush me. our rescue dog used to lie on his back and while the horse grazed, the dog sunned himself! how could you not like animals? (just a thought, not a criticism).
maybe this issue has cropped up, as a gift from the universe. something you need personally to address? or maybe the potential mates just need to know their pets. when mine started peeing (the cats), i checked their bladders first and then got the pheremone spray. since then, they've just pee'd on one woman's things. i can't say i didn't agree with them. they sensed something in her, that i too had problems with. she was very very controlling and part of a group i had here. just a thought, don't mean to say that is you. but, often when not understanding animals, that may be a reaction to them. also, maybe she needs a litter box in that room. they may not have wanted to leave her alone with a stranger. mine were just being territorial with one another--with the exception of that one woman! but, one does get bladder infections as well from it being "too small". given it's chronicity, he's now on chinese herbs for it. when that happens, most pee in the bathtub. not this one. he pees on my stove! | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:53:33 AM | motown-cowgirl, sorry but I don't believe you, Trying to prove you have experience training dogs because you disagree with my post is stupid. Next time try a modicum of maturity and prove your point with some valid evidence/research.
Maybe your dog will teach you the fact that an ad hominem argument, does not make any of your silly assertions factual, but I'm sure his next bark may enlighten you that everyone is entitled to their opinion.
The Internet if full of people who think they are guru's on dog training, now you are added to the list. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 11:21:39 AM | "prove your point with some valid evidence/research"
Please do your own research.
People who are accepted as being world experts in the field of dog behaviour agree with what we are saying. That is good enough for me. That and the decades I have worked in the dog industry, worked rescue including ferial rescue, and studying with expert people have taught me that certain humans will never get it. Probably because they simply don't want to get it. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 12:02:30 PM |
.... ...expert people have taught me that certain humans will never get it. Probably because they simply don't want to get it.
Ouch! Burn!  | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 12:09:47 PM | | At a seminar of Dr. Ian Dunbar, we watched as a person who truly didn't get it argued and lost every arguement. She didn't understand that she was completely wrong, but the couple of hundred other people present did. She still thought she knew best, and wouldn't even entertain thinking about what any of the other people said. Her loss, and a loss to any dog she comes in contact with. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 12:54:43 PM | | I agree with you, Passionate Gent! All dogs should have obedience training, and if they can't be trained, then they should not be allowed around other people! Let them maul their owners... | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 1:19:00 PM | Hum....................that is certainly not how I am reading what Passionate Gent is saying.
Agree that all dogs and their owners should have obedience training. Puppy training is usually only 6 or 8 weeks. Dogs and their owners should go to at least one more course than that. The big one is that the owners need to keep the dog obeying the obedience training for the rest of the dog life. It isn't a case of 6 weeks and you are done.
So many times I have seen people in obedience training throwing up their hands and saying the dog won't obey me. At that point the owner needs to learn how to understand that the need will obey if the owner doesn't give up. Once the dog knows the owner will get bored and give up if the dog doesn't obey each and every time, the dog has become the boss of the owner................bad, bad things can happen if the dog learns that it can get the upper hand.
Constant, good reenforcement with the dog makes life so pleasant for the rest of the time the owner has the pet. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 1:33:38 PM | serenity
assuming you are "not" a golden shower queen, ahem:
your luggage may have a marker from a prior pet,
they are sensing you as a threat, or your fear or dominance is worrying them, never leave your suitcase on the floor,
for cats, and i believe dogs as well, get plug in pheremone mist to be changed monthly--stops spraying and also good for sick pets.
if the horse pees on you, get a life jacket.
in nyc, we had an expression that someone was a "pisser". maybe you are just innately funny? and the animals are responding "literally".
hey OP, at least you are getting out. and into the bed, not the couch. sure you didn't stage this deliberately?
Serenity, thanks for all the tips, you covered quite a few subjects. No, I'm not a golden shower queen, and I didn't stage it deliberately, but hereby I'm releasing this method into the public domain, so other people could benefit from this experience.
I got the life jacket (just in case), and plan to use for another outing, where I'll try kayaking. That may be also a memorable experience. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 1:43:59 PM | | Dont worry about horses, You might get stepped on, but otherwise there wont be much a problem..(Check and see if the woman keeps them in the house........I have know of it to happen.) You said that she had a hobby farm. If she has a cow, and wants you to milk it, beware. Cows have been know to provide golden showers during milking. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 1:51:15 PM | ^^^
Actually, I went there this morning, and the horses were quite friendly. I took some advice from the other posts and invested in a bag of carrots. I asked for big carrots and when I told the cashier, I was taking them on my date, for some reason, she found it very funny. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:24:22 PM | Actually, I went there this morning, and the horses were quite friendly. I took some advice from the other posts and invested in a bag of carrots. I asked for big carrots and when I told the cashier, I was taking them on my date, for some reason, she found it very funny.
So she thought you were purchasing a suppliment?
thecatsmeoww | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 5:49:02 PM | Come on folks, you know I'm just trying to be provocative, can't stand when
everyone is in agreement, it makes for a boring party, hopefully you saved me some BBQ and didn't throw it all to the dogs. (Happy 4th doggy aficionados)
TopFind thanks for the laugh.
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:37:33 PM | | ^^^Nice attempted save................kind of like a wet nose, and sad eyes. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:00:55 PM | I'm surprised that no one mentioned another way to get around the animals 'territorality' - actually getting to know the pet and pet owner before you 'move in' to their territory.
Both instances of territorial pet behavior happed when you, a 'stranger', disturbed the normal routine of the pet and owner. The human owner KNEW and agreed to the changes, but there is no way to explain this to an animal on short notice of a few hours of aquantance. So the pets reacted.
I went on a trip recently with a friend to visit her family. They had a cute little dog about a yr old, that really took to me ( I love dogs and they usually love me) he followed me everywhere all weekend. The dog was well behaved & trained. They gave me their daughters room to sleep in, and the daughter bunked in with her mom. The dog usually slept in the daughter's room ( NOT on the bed, but in it's own bed in the room) That night, mom and daughter took the dog & his bed into mom's bedroom and the dog slept with them all night, no apparent problems. I've had dogs all my life, so I knew to put my bag and things up on something, not on the floor - just in case - but at some point over the weekend my raincoat slipped off the back of the chair (or was pulled off?) and it got peed on. It wasn't personal. He was just marking his territory, as he was not used to visitors.
a few years back, I dated a guy and we had been together long enough to really know each other's pets before we became intimate. He had 3 cats, & our pets slept on the beds in our homes. I am allergic to (some) cats - and his were house cats, with ONE litterbox in his small condo, that didn't get changed often enough. His cats would be on and off the bed at night, often chasing and playing with each other, as cats are often nocturnal -esp when confined to a house all the time. He would not /could not lock them out of the bedroom even though they caused HIM some serious sleep deprivation. But they never 'marked' my stuff.
At one point the upstairs neighbors' water heater leaked, causing some major water damage to his condo - which required the tearing out and rebuilding of interior walls & floors, contractors in and out of the unit, and stuff being moved around, tools everywhere as we did much of the work ourselves. One of the cats, especially , reacted to the changes, by refusing to use the litterbox, and instead, using any cloth or plastic left on the floor (he didn't like the plastic we taped down to protect the carpet from worker's boots & construction debris, so he peed on it)
I had worked gently INTO his routine, so I didn't get peed on.
The construction abruptly MESSED with his routine, so it got peed on!
the other two cats reacted, too - one hid all the time, until she came to trust me, and the other took to me right off - if he wasn't playing with me or laying near me - he was sleeping on my coat or with his face shoved inside one of my shoes... he loved my shoes!
My pets had NO reaction to my BF sleeping over. They are both well socialized and are used to having people in and out of the house alot. Raising a teenage boy meant having kids in and out of the house alot and friends overnight. They are used to various people coming and going. The dog gets up on the bed some, but prefers her rug on the floor next to the bed. (She likes to take her half out of the middle, so she gets shoved off - with or without anyone else in the bed!) The cat was a neighborhood stray I adopted, and he is an indoor/ outdoor cat. He's free to come and go as he pleases during the day, but I keep him in at night to limit his hunting and bringing me gory 'presents'. He sleeps either on the foot of the bed, or in a basket on a table nearby. Neither pet was 'banished' when my BF slept over - but neither was bothered by by someone else being in 'their' room, anyway.
I love my pets, most were 'rescues', and I treat them like furry children. But I know they ARE animals, not 'people', so they ARE trained, they are well socialized so they are well behaved, and they know who is 'Alpha' in this household - ME! | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/4/2009 11:10:47 PM | i say good on the **** cat!
if someone put me out of my house for the night i'd be pretty upset also.....
i don't know about peeing on the bed but i'd sure let on that i wasn't very happy! | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/9/2009 11:49:39 AM | RanRan -
peeing on the cat might be an easy answer for you - but it's a bit more difficult for a female to attempt!
However, I do realize that cats are different than dogs, and not as easy to train or make friends with, but it IS possible. When my cat adopted my family, (he had been a neighborhood stray) we were 'dog people', having never had a cat before. The cat tried to intimidate my dog, by hissing or swiping at him. (The dog, a golden retreiver mix, got along well with other animals and mostly ignored the cat, as he sensed the cat was wary and scared) Every time the cat misbehaved, however, he got scooped up and uncermoniously dumped OUTSIDE with a sharp "No!"
He's a smart, streetwise stray, it didn't take long before he figured out that if he wanted food and warm place to sleep, that he MUST 'play nice' with the dog. (conversely, I would not tolerate the dog, or kids, or anyone else, harassing the cat, either.)
If you pee on all your match's pets when first meeting them, RanRan, I think YOU might get pitched outside in the cold.....  | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/9/2009 12:01:03 PM | motown-cowgirl, sorry but I don't believe you,
of course not.
Trying to prove you have experience training dogs because you disagree with my post is stupid. Next time try a modicum of maturity and prove your point with some valid evidence/research.
i don't have to "try" to prove anything, but i might, if i thought you actually had an open mind. my doggies learn quicker than you do. and yet, they are completely incapable of thought! :wink:
Maybe your dog will teach you the fact that an ad hominem argument,
WTF are you going on about?
The Internet if full of people who think they are guru's on dog training, now you are added to the list.
i never said i was a guru at anything. but here's a complement for you and i hope it makes you feel better: you've got a very vivid imagination. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/9/2009 1:35:49 PM | | ^^^^^ Gosh, I agree with Motown again, but last time I did that the thread got deleted? whats up with THAT? and Motown is a dog training guru? Be afwaid.... be vewwwwwwy afwaid!! | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/11/2009 12:05:43 PM | ah, OP has found that the carrot, and not the stick, makes all the difference in the world to a horse. that is how i was trained to deal with the rescue horses i encountered.
with dogs and cats, try cantelope! i once had a half melon on my plate on the floor. came back to my dogclamped onto one end of the melon and my cat affixed to the other. he was dragging the two (cat and melon) along the floor. she was growling and holding onto her end of the melon at the same time. just in time to cut the melon in two and prevent a lover's quarrel. when she was a kitten, she slept on top of him and if you so much as yell at her, he'll grab your leg very fiercely. pets can be extremely funny. i believe they are the root cause of most of the original cartoons!
glad your date is working out!  | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/14/2009 2:29:39 PM | SerenityCW said:
ah, OP has found that the carrot, and not the stick, makes all the difference in the world
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Yes, the carrots worked great! And we still had some left for the horses. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/14/2009 2:43:33 PM | People assume that you'll find their pets as endearing as they do.
Personally I avoid women w/ profiles showing them holding an animal or kissing it.
I like dogs and cats.
But they are just that...dogs and cats.
I'm not going to be mean to them...but I'm not going to make them the focal point of my life.
Some people do...and then become angry and confused when you don't see things the way that they do.
I spent the night at a lady's house that had an incontinent dog that she let sleep on the bed.
The dog had an accident and I left after taking a quick shower (no...besides the one in the bed).
The next day I got a call about how I had upset her dog with my reaction.
I hadn't yelled or anything..I had just got the bed really quick and then got into the shower.
I told her that I had never had a dog urinate on me before so I guess wasn't sure HOW I should react.
Needless to say,we cut things short.
She never apologized for her dog.
As I said,I like pets.
To a point. | |
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| Bad experience with pets
Posted: 7/14/2009 2:52:23 PM | No Excuses Please said:
I spent the night at a lady's house that had an incontinent dog that she let sleep on the bed.
The dog had an accident and I left after taking a quick shower (no...besides the one in the bed).
The next day I got a call about how I had upset her dog with my reaction.
I hadn't yelled or anything..I had just got the bed really quick and then got into the shower.
I told her that I had never had a dog urinate on me before so I guess wasn't sure HOW I should react.
Needless to say,we cut things short. She never apologized for her dog.
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My symphaties! This beats even my experiences.
I think, I'll stick with dates owning dolls and teddy bears. | |
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