| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:38:57 PM | One of the single greatest things fought for by women was control over their own bodies, control over when they want to get pregnant. Feminist literature since the pill was introduced praises it as the greatest thing since sliced bread for women.
Your body, your responsibility.
In a less grumbly mode I would say sure, why not, sex usually takes 2. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:56:35 PM | Guess it depends, Op. Are you an "independent woman"? Or, a "clingy, need-a-man, gold digger" woman?
Maybe to save that monthly expense, you could propose to him that since he doesn't have to pay for birth control, then you're not going to either and insist he pay for half the abortion should the need ever arise.
It really does sound like you're saying, "if you want to screw me, then you need to pay for it." There's a term for that...hmm, it escapes me at the moment. Actually, it doesn't, but I'm trying to be nice.
Good gawd almighty. Personal responsibility is on the verge of extinction.
~ds~ | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 12:21:31 AM | If you're dating/sleeping with somone, it would be nice if this someone is a generous human being, that would help you if you are so financially strapped, buying birth control is a problem.
As to whether he should share the cost of birth control, no. M | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 2:26:35 AM | My first reaction is if i'm paying half or even all of $30 a month for her birth control, i better have an unlimited ride pass, plus all access pass to every show -with dining and snacking privledges. -thats really quite a bargain!!!
second thing: a good number of women take the pill to regulate her cycle (birth control is just an ancillary bonus) | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 4:23:50 AM | No.
If you're smart enough to give it up, you should be smart enough to know the costs of whatever you're using, and use your head to get help paying for it if you can't.
As someone who used to not have health insurance years ago...
1) planned parenthood is your friend--insurance or not. They provide free condoms, low cost/sliding scale fees for birth control and TESTING, and more.
2) there are many clinics that aren't free but again, sliding fee scale. I used to get a depo shot (not for bc but other issues) and paid maybe $8 each time. Even when I lived in Hawaii and had no insurance, I was able to find a provider who didn't charge me an arm and a leg to see me. They're out there--as a woman, don't be lazy and say "they're not." Birth control or NOT, you need to see a gynecologist if you're female. Sex or not.
For those who DO have health insurance, and as someone who works in the health insurance field...
1) almost ALL insurance companies pay for birth control of some sort. Not sure? CALL THEM. If you're paying $30/mth for pills, what's wrong with that scenario? Most insurance companies have 90-day scripts. 3 pill packs for $20 or even $50 by mail. My old insurance company paid for my Mirena--I paid $20 for the office visit. Even if they don't have mail order they have something. ASK.
2) ask your provider for samples of something new if he/she is recommending a change. Gynecologists get mad samples. ASK THEM. Tell the doctor you can't afford whatever and you'd be surprised at the help you'll get. If you can't talk to the man or woman who's down there in your cookie about your cookie then you've got issues.
3) make sure that your script isn't written for the brand name whatever. Most of us can use the generic and it's the same. ASK FOR IT.
If you're that broke and can't afford BC, then he needs to wear a condom. PERIOD. He "won't" wear one? Maybe you "don't" need to be with him.
I've been broker than broke before and damn if I didn't pay for THAT one thing on my own always. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 4:38:59 AM | | Interesting question, OP. I've never really thought about that, but probably because I had a tubal ligation almost immediately following my divorce (and birth of my second child). But, like most people, I think, I still use condoms for "safer" sex. I think it's more than fair to ask a partner to share the expense. We get so many "who pays?" threads, this is just another aspect, and I don't consider it petty at all. Some months $30 seems like a lot of money to me! | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:30:30 AM | I think it's a nice gesture!
However safesex/contraception is your own responisbility.
If your too cheap to buy contraception and protect yourself then withdraw. You only have yourself to blame if *accidents* happen. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:38:30 AM | | No. Why should he? These things are not that expensive, and personally, I would not even ask a man to pay for them. There are plenty of places to go who offer "discounts" on Birth Control if you are in a bind. I see commercials all the time. And birth control is MUCH cheaper than a pregnancy or the "alternative". monogomous/long term whatever you call it...there is nothing wrong with him wearing a condom. When he marry's you it is "long term". And even then, sometimes it isn't. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 6:25:41 AM | Op, what is your cultural background (I guess i should have read your profile, before asking ;-) ).
I hadn't thought of this in ages. But I was born and grew up in Germany and it was quite common that a committed young couple shared the cost of the pill, if they're both in their late teens, 17/18/19, while their still in their apprenticeships.
After you leave school, you spend 2 or 3 years as an apprentice and get $ 150-250 per month, depending on which year you're in. At that time the cost of the pill can be a big chunk, if only one person has to carry the burden.
But then, we're also a country that sees 'going dutch' for everything as the norm. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 6:49:36 AM | | your life and your responsibility. you hear the term "he got her pregnant" but it`s actually "she allowed herself to get pregnant". it`s a life altering event so you need to be responsible for yourself and stop asking men to pay the bill. you can`t imagine the expense of having a kid. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 6:56:31 AM | | catlady, sometimes $30 is a lot of money for us too. this issue has split along typical lines. the responsible for myself women will pay for them and the pay me for sex crowd think the man should pay for them as they're a sex expense. do you get a rebate because some other guy gets to use "your" birth control. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:52:46 AM |
I'll pay half your birth control if you pay for half the gas it took me to your house and *plow you*. and oh yeah you owe me $600 thats your half for the dinners too.
How dare some guys think that they are farmer and I am a field to be plowed, to plant zuchinnis,Japanese radishes and cucumbers ,Aayy yay,yay, that does it !!! I will forget about men and become a nun..
Gas+$ 600 is a barter of those " footsies "," commando style manuevers" under the table while dining out......
 no pay birth control ,no honey.......... | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:53:13 AM |
this issue has split along typical lines. the responsible for myself women will pay for them and the pay me for sex crowd think the man should pay for them as they're a sex expense.
Now that you mention it, in the latter case she should try writing it off on her income taxes as a business expense. I suppose the guy could try doing this too. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:59:34 AM | | She should pay for her birth control and HE should pay for the condoms, since birth control methods (the pill and other methods) normally do NOT prevent stds. That is the main reason to use condoms, they aren't that reliable for birth control. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 8:12:09 AM | I believe that the answer is that it should be something discussed between the couple .. in these very scary and unpredictable times we are going to see unprecedented issues of poverty and homelessness.. over 37 percent of the American population was homeless in the dirty thirties .. we couldn't put that many on the streets today without chaos occurring and with the influx of bail out money.. hyper inflation will take us down further in the mainstream of the economy than we are now.. this recession and depression isn't even close to being where it is going to go.. and if you believe we are stabilizing you are living in a dream and need to come out of it... !!!!
We are going to see food prices rise.. shortages of what isn't because what was is gone... there is no way we are not all going to feel what is going to be.. it is on the way and anyone that can't see this coming is living in a fog...
Mutual decisions in a relationship are about the two people in the tango .. if you love someone .. I mean really love someone it would kill you to see them hurt.. it would devastate the ground you walk on .. so making sure that both people are healthy would be important as a couple .. working out the sexual aspects as a couple are what make a relationship humm .. if you can be together there .. you can be together anywhere ... if he is concerned about you .. he is telling you that you matter as deeply to him as he matters to himself .. he will want to protect the being that he loves .. that is what a man who is complete does .. he needs to feel that you are okay because it makes him feel okay.. it is the ticket to great intimacy and without that caring depth .. of communication you might as well be slapping genitals with the milk man with a bag over either ors head..
Emotional connection is necessary to a union of two mating.. and if you are not concerned for the others health then you are not in love .. to live and die being concerned is when you know that you have love .. it is all encompassing .. it should be very important to both if you truly are deeply and intensely in love. There molecules matter to you and make you feel needed without that it is just a booty call and a boot .. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/2/2009 8:13:08 AM | Perhaps the guy should pay half...but only IF he gets sex "half the time!"...he IS paying for that....so why shouldn't he be getting it?
Perhaps if a preganancy does occur he should be found NOT financially responsible. He did all the right things to make sure there would be no children. But should he be hung because she "forgot" her pill one day or a defective batch or whatever reason? A broken condom is one thing...but a chemical birth control is something else. | |
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