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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 5:24:44 AM | | nope. your the one with the eggs. if your not using rubbers its on you. you should probably be using both. ive never been getting ready to do the deed with a new partner and said im gonna need a 2 dollar condom fee. if its a precaution you take for your body you should pay. when your guy gets older are you gonna chip in on his viagara. 2 things guys money should not go towards in the guy code, 1 pads-tampons 2 birth control pills | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 5:35:25 AM | I can not believe this thread have gone this far.
Being a woman....my opinion is that this question would never even arise in my mind.
I use birth control to give MYSELF peace of mind in many aspects....its something I must do if I want to fully enjoy my sexual life.....so...
I am the one getting it for myself.....no one else.
This is an example of double standard with guys.....we want them to pay for the date expenses, but we cant even take care of our basic safety expenses ????
If like OP states relationship is monogamous and LTR, I assume they live together and possibly it gets paid from household bank account...in that case I'd say it falls into the YES category.
Im married and all medications/pharmacy expenses at home are household expenses...this falls into this category, pharmacy expenses. | |
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| Hence my concern....
Posted: 7/3/2009 9:44:01 AM |
the OP is 19; cant afford BC pill & not using condoms- but she can afford cigarettes which are... what... $10 a pack?
...over the potential that she might breed....
Then she'll smoke through the pregnancy as well, I betcha.... | |
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| I hope to gawd....
Posted: 7/3/2009 9:58:39 AM | i agree its stupid to fight over stupid shit like that. if he wanted to yes he could but,if he says no then forget it .not worth fighting over. my kids dad wanted more kids ,i sad no and when my last baby was born i got fixed. u dont want a baby yet get the shot .And when he wants to have sex and not help pay so u dont get pregnant easy make him wear a condom . if he dont like it then he dont get any sex.thats what i did to my kids dad before we had our kids. its that easy, plus ur not fight over stuip shit. thats why after i had my last kid i got fixed so there is no fight over who is going to do what. that easy. and if u never want kids pay the money and get fixed. my bestfriend did, her and her old man dont want kids so they both got fixed.  | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:29:13 AM |
Maybe i should give a little more info. I was his first..he was mine..we have been together since high school. i work full time..i help out my disabled parents..and yeah 30 bucks is alot of cash for me..we havnt used condoms for a year now..and i have been paying for my birth control..until i couldnt afford it and i had to come off it..for three monthes...it came to the point where i asked him to pay 15 bucks a month for it..or else he would have to buy his own condoms because it was between b control and gas to go to work. I am not cheap, i am barley getting groceries.
First, second, 1000th man...doesn't matter. What matters is that apparently sex is more important than anything else to one or the both of you and THAT'S a problem.
GO TO THE FREE CLINIC. Seriously!! There's no shame in that and at 19 and broke, you could get whatever you needed, more than likely free.
I don't know where you live but if there's a planned parenthood close, go there. If not, check at the local colleges--someone there would know something.
You're giving a lot of excuses and it doesn't matter if he's paying or NOT. If neither of you can afford birth control, you damn sure can't afford a KID.
I don't care if he pays or doesn't pay--you're old enough to have sex, then you're old enough to go get help. If you're a smoker, you're spending what, $30 or more a MONTH to smoke right? Ummm...cigs or pregnancy?
I bet you're scrambling to find money to smoke--either stop smoking or go find free or low cost birth control methods. Stop asking if he should help and more importantly, if he WON'T, ask yourself what good is he. Anyone can get laid--ANYONE. And after 3 years if he's not stepping up to help you in some shape, form or fashion then baby you need to ask yourself why are you bothering??? | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:34:21 AM | See, a lot of women want full control and all say in all things, but want to pony off the responsibility that comes with it onto men.
"Only if you want him to have a say in what should be done should you become pregnant. I wouldn't want a guy to have anything to do with any of that."
You wouldn't want your guy to at least have some input on your pregnancy? Wow.
Right, which is why the law should be changed so that if a man wants a woman to get an abortion, and she doesn't, he should not be on the hook for child support. She wants ALL the say. No vote = no responsibility. See, it's like taxation without representation. We had a little war about that like 220 years ago.
It's the price for exclusive say in the decision making process.
As far as birth control pills, most girls i've dated are always saying they take them for hormonal control or they make their period lighter or more regular or less painful or whatever. So they'd take them regardless if she was having sex or not. Why would i pay someone else's medical expenses? Last girl I was officially with didn't even try to get the kind i wanted (the one where you only have a period every 3 months) because she felt that that wasn't healthy for whatever ridiculous reason. If i can't have any input into it, I have no reason to contribute to it. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:43:19 AM | Why not have us pay for your femimine products as well?
So let me get this straight....You are suggesting that we pay for half of the pill. However, if you get pregnant it appears that it is solely your right to have the baby? Why not make half the decision as well?
Seems like you have several choices here:
Option 1: SACK IT OR GO HOME AND WACK IT. You can dry hump, oral and jerk him off.
Option 2: Like Russian Roulette..have him pull out and take his chances.
Option 3: Planned parenthood maybe able to help you reduce the cost of said products.
Some women use the pill to control thier acne, endometriosis and or monthly cycle. Those are outside the scope of sex. Where would you like to draw the line? | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:45:53 AM | Everyone is getting so mad..its crazy lol.
Birth control is the safest method..way more effective than condoms..condoms cost more actually in the long run. We both agreed that no kids were happenening..when i couldnt afford my b control..i didnt use it..i got condoms. When we asked why i wasnt taking it i told him straight out that the extra thirty a month did make a diffrence especiallly when i am supporting two other adults and have to drive to work and pay gas to do so. Holy frig, my boyfriend pays half for my birth control, shoot me. I am not the only person i know, my other friends boyfriend pays for all of it.
I don't see why he shouldn't. I pay for my own movies/diners/dates..if i dont have cash we dont go out..but as far as pregnancy goes..he asked me to go back on it..so i guess its part his responability | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:58:23 AM | | Seriously??????????? IMO a resounding NO.... I am responsible for my own birth control cost as I am the one who does not want to get pregnant. It is much cheaper to pay for birth control then an unwanted pregnancy. Let's get real...part of taking responsibility for your behavior is covering the cost of it. If you can't afford to pay for birth control then don't have sex. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but geeezzzesh! *shakes head with a deep sigh* | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 10:59:10 AM | Now, I'm going to conclude I've seen everything in these forums!
The answer to your question is no, no, no and no!!!! I would never expect a man to pay for birth control pills, patch, shot, etc. It's my body and my responsibility.
If you don't have money for the pills, like others have suggested, go to a free clinic.
I have seen threads on whether or not a man should pay for the babysitter (for a woman's children) so they can go on a date, whether a man should pay for every meal, movie and activity, whether a man should pay just to enjoy my company. Ladies, we live in a time when we can get out and earn a living, where we can own our own home, car, and other things, we can live alone and don't HAVE to be married or live with parents. Personally, I'm so happy to live at a time where I'm considered an equal. But being equal means I must take responsibility, too. Responsibility is realizing that I must take care of myself, my body, my son, my home, etc. Responsibility is realizing that no one owes me anything. If I want to date a man, I date him because I enjoy his company, not his wallet. Threads like this give women a bad name!! | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 11:04:38 AM | I can't believe this is even an issue when you say you are in a relationship. In a good relationship everything and anything your partner needs is a shared expense. I don't care if it's birth control, food, gas, electric or even rent payments. Thee is no way I'd let the woman I am in a relationship bare the hardship of having trouble in paying any of the above. That's one of the benefits of being in a relationship. It's called sharing all you have for the one you care about.
Your situation wiht your boyfriend does not sound like a relationship to me. I would not call it one if I had a woman that had to raise such a question. It would be a given that I'd see to it she had money for all her needs as described above.
Does the younger generation not share anymore? | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 11:55:55 AM |
Man pays for ... child support...if he's dumb enough not to wrap wet willie.
Just a guess, but I'd suppose he's not at much risk here under the principle that you can't squeeze money out of an empty wallet, so there's little point in him paying up for any CS "insurance". If he could, you'd think she'd put him on the spot with an "...or else" sort of ultimatum. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 12:04:21 PM | No.. A man doesn't have to wear a condom to practice birth control. Have you heard of the rythum (sp?) method..? Or he can pull out at the right time of the month instead of avoiding intercourse during those times..
Using the pill or some kind of spermicide is not healthy for either of you... | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 12:10:24 PM | ^^^^...It seems that OP did use that ultimatum...when she went off birth control....and OP's b/f decided he'd pay for half the pill perscription....but, hmmmm....OP is the one who's financially strapped....she never mentioned anything about b/f's finances...
That aside....a man should protect himself and the woman he's with with a condom...a condom is the most effective way to have sex and still avoid std's and babies.
VVV...sorry Ros...VVV I'd forgotten about free clinics... | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 12:35:56 PM | Im sorry I read a bit more about OP's financial situation.
She is being a responsible young woman.
I assume that maybe she didn't have time to check for free resources like clinics that could provide her with the birth control at little or no cost. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 2:15:23 PM | No.. A man doesn't have to wear a condom to practice birth control. Have you heard of the rythum (sp?) method..? Or he can pull out at the right time of the month instead of avoiding intercourse during those times..]
snowbird.. would think you are old enough to know the failure rate of that! | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:11:54 PM | The poster isn't asking whether she should stop using birth control if her partner refuses to help pay. She's not even asking whether it is her ultimate responsibility to protect HERSELF from an unwanted pregnancy. Clearly it is, clearly she realises that, and as her multiple posts have established, she takes that responsibility seriously. SHE and only she provides it, whether it is in condom or some other form, as things stand.
BUT. She IS asking whether in a long-term, serious relationship, it COULD actually be considered a JOINT responsibility, shared between the TWO people who regularly have sex together, and ONLY with each other. According to what we've been told, this is a young woman with many responsibilities, including care for people other than herself, who pays her own way within her relationship, and yes, she struggles to spend that money each month on birth control. It's a question about RELATIONSHIPS and what two people within them should be able to expect from one another--again, in a RELATIONSHIP. It's not about whether or not women or men are more or less responsible for who might or might not get knocked up, as they go through life screwing each other (literally and figuratively).
My personal opinion OP is that your boyfriend SHOULD help with this if it is a hardship for you to bear the cost alone, and that if he is unwilling to help based on some asinine view of "your womb, your problem," then you really know all you need to know about his potential as a life PARTNER for you. Heaven forfend you DID get pregnant--for I suspect that you would have an equally difficult time convincing him to help bear responsibility for THAT. But male abdication of responsibility when it comes to their sperm, its distribution, and its outcome (read offspring) is nothing new--indeed it is a rather chronic problem in our society, the attitudes responsible for which I think we have plenty of evidence here, in some of the comments on this thread. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 3:51:54 PM |
No.. A man doesn't have to wear a condom to practice birth control. Have you heard of the rythum (sp?) method..? Or he can pull out at the right time of the month instead of avoiding intercourse during those times..
Yeah, like I'm gonna trust a guy to pull out.
Seriously, you are too old to spout such ignorance.
My Catholic granny practiced the rhythm mehtod; that's why she had eleven children.
The rhythm method and the withdrawal method have much higher rates of failure than most other methods of BC; in fact I would go so far as to say they aren't even really BC at all... just a dangerous gamble. Furthermore, if you don't know the woman well, how would you know she was being truthful that it was a "safe" day?
Using the pill or some kind of spermicide is not healthy for either of you...
Ya know what's REALLY not healthy for you? STD's and unwanted pregnancy. | |
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| Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control?
Posted: 7/3/2009 4:16:10 PM | Using the pill or some kind of spermicide is not healthy for either of you...]
^^ he's a guy, doesnt have to take a pill or use a spermacide so WTH does HE know??
I still dont think.. if it is not a married couple or people who have lived together for yrs; that anyone but the woman is responsible for BC moneywise as far as pregnancy. There are a variety of birth control methods that work, tho nothing except abstinence is 100% effective. There are IUD's, the pill, diaphrams, Depo, condoms used with or without spermicides. She says she uses SOMETHING.. or not.. Im getting confused... but is not on the pill.... & they dont use condoms... next she will be posting that she is expecting
Now to protect fr STD's; they can BOTH buy the condoms.
give up the f**king smokes then you will have the $ for the BC! | |
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