| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 8:28:33 PM |
well can i just get one thing clear,
i got pregnant at 15 was jst turning 16 when i had my gawjuss lil girl
i dont think its a problem with girls having children soo young if there mature enough too gert in bed with some one then mature enough to have a child
my lil girl is nearly too now and she dosent miss owt on anytthing
i work i do 48 hours aweek to make sure my lil gril has the best upbringnig
so i dont c what all this fuss is about
This is a joke, right? | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 8:37:08 PM | No, is not a joke.
There is a divided consensus among teenager mothers, almost 50/50, that teenager pregnancy wasn't an inconvenience and/or limitation to their personal and social life.
Children, celebrating having children, are so stupid that they don't see it as something wrong or detrimental for the impact in their future life. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 8:40:10 PM | | I am single mom of 4 sons. i got pregnant at 17 had my son at 18. I finish high school and worked 2 jobs to make end meet.. I never when to college cause money was tight and plus i really didn't have time.. I never was married. I never partied, drank or did drugs when i got pregnant. I got pregnant on prom night of my jr year.. yes we had used a condom but i guess it had a hole or it broke cause 2 months later i find out i was pregnant.. I am raising my sons on my own it only make us women stronger in my book.. I do get help from my parents (not with money). They will take my kids out with them or let me have couple of hours of just me time.. I really like this cause it help me out plus it give them time to spent with there grandsons.. I really don't think it matter what age you are when you have a child as long as you step up and take care of your child. Children need TLC the most, then food in there bellys and diapers and clothes.. These are the move important things in a child's life.. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 8:47:53 PM | | I had all 4 of my kids by the time I was 22/23. Now, I'm 37 and I'm in the home stretch. Yes, I missed out on alot of stuff such as dating and stuff but, I was married to a career firefighter. So, I was taken care of and didn't want for much (except love and sex). Now, I'm proud to be the parent of my children and all have turned out well. My oldest is going off to college this year and she's going to make something of herself.... | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 8:52:38 PM | Let's see here...
At 16, 15 in some states, you can legally have conscentual sex. How exactly does this mean you can be a mother if you think you are mature enough? In many states, you can't even lug around other underage teens in your vehicle, you aren't allowed to vote, smoke cigarettes, consume alcoholic beverages, rent a vehicle, enter into a legally binding contract; including getting a credit card, getting a loan of any kind, signing a lease, purchasing insurance, you cannot even be tried as an adult if you commit a crime, with the exception of special circumstances in some extreme cases.
If you are really mature at 16, and having sex, you are using a condom, because you aren't ignorant enough to think that all a baby needs is love, clean clothes and WIC. The average cost of an infant its first year of life is $10,000. That's if you're lucky enough to still be covered under your parent's insurance or you got some state or hospital aid to cover the cost of your $3,000 - $12,000 hospital bill for just giving birth. That's not even including the costs of doctor visits during pregnancy and the first two years. That is barring the need to go to the emergency room if your infant becomes ill.
I cannot believe the naivete of this forum. Nobody cares that you got pregnant at 15, 16, 17, 18 and how your child is doing great now. Your child isn't you. Did the 32 year old doctor get someone pregnant as a teenager? No? Then it isn't relevant. It's great that your child made the best of the bed you made for him, but quit preaching it as something that is acceptable to have children as a teen in our society.
It absolutely isn't.
It's unfair to taxpayers, it's unfair to the children, it's unfair to yourself and the other lives you affect.
This isn't about what you did and how you turned out. It's about setting a better standard for the generations growing up now. It seems like 12 is the new 16, and where will it stop?
When they are quoting STD percentages for age groups 11-16 and that they are rising, it makes me sick. Do those of you with children want to imagine your own having sex during this age bracket? Do you think it's up to your child to decide that they are mature enough?
Instead of turning an immature mistake you made into some glorious act of maturity, tell the truth about it, and spread that word. You're only infuriating us that want our children to know that raising a child isn't to be taken lightly, and that having sex can change your life in astronomical ways.
I didn't get it when I was younger, but now I understand why having sex when you are in a committed, stable, adult relationship is so important. You shouldn't be having unprotected sex unless you and your partner are financially and emotionally ready to have a child. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 8:53:49 PM |
No, is not a joke.
There is a divided consensus among teenager mothers, almost 50/50, that teenager pregnancy wasn't an inconvenience and/or limitation to their personal and social life.
Children, celebrating having children, are so stupid that they don't see it as something wrong or detrimental for the impact in their future life.
You obviously missed why I was asking if it was a joke. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:01:36 PM | No, I don't miss why you asked.
I just answered they aren't joking, they really believe that shite.
Edit below: I doubt is a satire. That's the worse... that kind of promotion for teenager pregnancy/childbirth as no such of big deal. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:04:51 PM |
No, I don't miss why you asked.
I just answered they aren't joking, they really believe that shite.
It looked like it was written by a 6 year old. Plus, what it said was pretty atrocious as an argument to promote teen pregnancy as an acceptable beat.
So, I was hoping it was satire.
That aside, you are exactly right.
Children need TLC the most, then food in there bellys and diapers and clothes.. These are the move important things in a child's life..
I am pretty certain that food and water goes first on the list of needs. I don't know of a baby that could survive on "TLC".
You really think that you should promote teenagers to give up their life because you say it's easier to become a parent than to grow up first? Even the most financially secure, emotionally taken care of mothers spend a night so exhausted and crying because of how hard it is the first few months with NO SLEEP. I can't imagine how hard it is to have to do that, and then go to one job, let alone two. Why would you promote that as something that's up to a teenager's discretion? | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:14:07 PM |
No, is not a joke.
There is a divided consensus among teenager mothers, almost 50/50, that teenager pregnancy wasn't an inconvenience and/or limitation to their personal and social life.
Children, celebrating having children, are so stupid that they don't see it as something wrong or detrimental for the impact in their future life.
Exactly.
I am single mom of 4 sons. i got pregnant at 17 had my son at 18. I finish high school and worked 2 jobs to make end meet.. I never when to college cause money was tight and plus i really didn't have time.. I never was married. I never partied, drank or did drugs when i got pregnant. I got pregnant on prom night of my jr year.. yes we had used a condom but i guess it had a hole or it broke cause 2 months later i find out i was pregnant.. I am raising my sons on my own it only make us women stronger in my book.. I do get help from my parents (not with money). They will take my kids out with them or let me have couple of hours of just me time.. I really like this cause it help me out plus it give them time to spent with there grandsons.. I really don't think it matter what age you are when you have a child as long as you step up and take care of your child. Children need TLC the most, then food in there bellys and diapers and clothes.. These are the move important things in a child's life..
So this happened to you 4 times? With the same guy? So you were totally supporting yourself and your sons in your own home, paying all of your own bills with no help from anyone? That's amazing at such a young age. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:20:32 PM | Again, this is an adult site and it sounds like the women that have posted used protection, knew the consequences, and acted responsibly.
The woman that you are asking if it is a joke is not from the US or Canada.
The woman that I know that had the son at 16 finished high school and her son went on to massive school. Obviously that is what you would call a success story for both her and her son.
My mother's son, my big brother, has his Phd and is a retired Air force Capt. and author.
I didn't see anyone say they were on welfare or other assistance.
Point is, if you want to preach about teenage pregnancy, an adult dating site is not the place imo. You need to be talking to your children or family. Bashing these women that have done the best for themselves and their children serves what purpose? | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:31:49 PM |
Again, this is an adult site and it sounds like the women that have posted used protection, knew the consequences, and acted responsibly.
The woman that you are asking if it is a joke is not from the US or Canada.
The woman that I know that had the son at 16 finished high school and her son went on to massive school. Obviously that is what you would call a success story for both her and her son.
My mother's son, my big brother, has his Phd and is a retired Air force Capt. and author.
I didn't see anyone say they were on welfare or other assistance.
Point is, if you want to preach about teenage pregnancy, an adult dating site is not the place imo. You need to be talking to your children or family. Bashing these women that have done the best for themselves and their children serves what purpose?
Your brother and the other man that went to college are not teen parents. They are not relevant. My parents were young and didn't do a good job. My personal success has absolutely nothing to do with them, and nothing irritates me more than when they take credit for it by toting their horrible parenting expertise.
This is a forum, expect discussion, not a brown-nosing session.
If someone is feeling "bashed", they should go find a biased audience who won't disagree with their holy attitude promoting teen pregnancy. Or stay, take a dose of reality, and try to make an example of themselves as a "What not to do". | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:38:51 PM | "I don't know what statistics are on successful versus unsuccessful teen moms."
Check for some at glance info on Stayteen website. Click on 'get informed'.
Btw, teen pregnancy in US is twice higher than UK or Canada and eight times higher than Spain. Those three countries, incidentally, have universal health care. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:43:27 PM | | I was 17 when I had my child. Now I am a single mother parenting the best I can. I graduated high school 5 months early that way I could start college as soon as I could. I have no one here to help me raise my son who is my life and I wouldn't change a thing about it. Now you tell me teens in our society don't have the means to raise a child? I know a lot of girls having kids early and most of them are single parents. I've seen their children growing up and they do a hell of a job raising them. I give kudos to those raising children alone. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:48:55 PM |
I was 17 when I had my child. Now I am a single mother parenting the best I can. I graduated high school 5 months early that way I could start college as soon as I could. I have no one here to help me raise my son who is my life and I wouldn't change a thing about it. Now you tell me teens in our society don't have the means to raise a child? I know a lot of girls having kids early and most of them are single parents. I've seen their children growing up and they do a hell of a job raising them. I give kudos to those raising children alone.
Living with your parents or in government paid housing is not the same thing as having the means to take care of your child. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 9:59:57 PM | The progression of this thread is making me feel hopeless for the upcoming generations.
Out of girls who give birth to children before they have completed their 18th year of life; only 41% become high school graduates. Fewer than two percent earn a college degree by age 30. Finding a regular source of income becomes difficult as every job position demands certain skills which are markedly lacking because they do not have an education.
75% of teen mothers file for public assistance within 5 years of giving birth.
Children born to such young parents often display retarded psycho-social development and malnutritional effects. This is because a teenage mother lacks parenting skills. She fails to understand what her child needs and does not realize the importance of smiling, touching or verbally communicating with her child. Anger against society is taken out on the child and physical abuse is possible.
The United States has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the industrialized world -- twice as high as in England or Canada and eight times as high as in the Netherlands or Japan.
- Almost 50% of teens have never considered how a pregnancy would affect their lives.
- Parenthood is the leading reason why teen girls drop out of school.
- Children of teen mothers do worse in school than those born to older parents -- they are 50 percent more likely to repeat a grade, are less likely to complete high school than the children of older mothers, and have lower performance on standardized tests.
- Two-thirds of families begun by a young unmarried mother are poor. More than half of all mothers on welfare had their first child as a teenager.
- Teen mothers are likely to have a second birth relatively soon -- about one-fourth of teenage mothers have a second child within 24 months of the first birth -- which can further impede their ability to finish school or keep a job, and to escape poverty.
- Eight out of ten fathers don't marry the mother of their child. These absent fathers pay less than $800 annually for child support, often because they are poor themselves. Children who live apart from their fathers are also five times more likely to be poor than children with both parents at home.
- The daughters of young teen mothers are three times more likely to become teen mothers themselves
- The sons of teen mothers are twice as likely to end up in prison.
- Pregnant teens are far less likely to receive timely and consistent prenatal care than those who get pregnant at a later age. The children of teen mothers are more likely to be born prematurely and at low birthweight and are two times more likely to suffer abuse and neglect compared to children of older mothers. Teen mothers are also more likely to smoke during pregnancy, and often teen mothers are not at adequate pre-pregnancy weight and/or do not gain the appropriate amount of weight while pregnant.
Interesting, and less hopeless:
- Most teens who have had sex wish they had waited. Almost 70% of teens regret having had sex as early as they did.*
- Teens are eager for a strong abstinence message. Ninety-four percent of teens say they want a strong message to abstain until at least after high school.
*It's probably higher than that. The fear that someone will say you don't love your child because of saying you should have waited makes people lie. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:10:55 PM | pquote[ Well my mom had me at 19....so based on that Im all for it!!!
You are an example of why most people are against teen motherhood. One of the problems with it is that the children of teen mothers tend to become teen mothers themselves, perpetuating the cycle. You have just proven that to be the case. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:16:23 PM |
Most women today are NEVER ready to have children
13571113 I'm just curious to what being ready to have a child implies??? At 25 I started trying to get pregnant with my ex... had my daughter at 26 and I felt emotionally ready to have a child.
my mom got married at 18 I personally couldn't imagine getting married at 18. My mom however didn't have me till she was 25. I couldn't imagine having a child at 18 or 20 I went straight out of high school and did another 5 yrs at university. I worked for a yr went back to school then felt my biological clock ticking and got pregnant.
I can't imagine being a teen mother. When I was in Vancouver I met this girl she had just come to canada couldn't speak a word of english from Sudan. Anyway this girl was 14 she had been raped and was now a mother. So instead of being in school she was home with her baby. Like how hard was her life going to be. She came to canada for a better life and instead she was raped and now a teen/child mother.
To avoid teen pregnancy need to advocate safe sex. Abstence doesn't work its niave. Are society is full of sexual images. The US saw an incline of teen pregnancy during the Bush Jr. administration because he only gave money to schools that taught abstence. Other countries that teach safe sex have a lower teen pregnancy rate.
I don't think anyone advocates teen pregnancy. But if u want to help to make sure teen pregnancy doesn't hapen can work with kids that are high at risk. Volunteer be a big brother/sister. And make sure ur kids babysit because babysitting will make them realize its hard work raising a child.
When I was 16 I once babysat 6 kids in a trailor ranging from 6 month old baby to a girl who was 13 and instead of helping me she kept giving the twins stuff to put in their mouths. So baby sitting is a great form of birth control. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:19:20 PM | If someone is feeling "bashed", they should go find a biased audience who won't disagree with their holy attitude promoting teen pregnancy. Or stay, take a dose of reality, and try to make an example of themselves as a "What not to do". If I have a holy attitude, it must be the Reverend in me coming out, but certainly I don't feel superior to anyone.
I am sure your parents don't realize how much you resent their decision to have you, perhaps you need to have a discussion with them and clear the air about your feelings about their assistance or lack of assistance with you.
I don't promote teen pregnancy and as I have previously stated, my children are all virgins. Am sure that that would be considered good parenting. Teaching your children etc. again is what you can do.
I was 23 when I had my oldest. I am out of the age range specified.
My mom's kids all went on to college. All 4 of us found our own way. Again, my mother was 19 when she started having us.
I will try to check out the site to see what the economical effect 18 -20 year olds having children has when I get the chance.
I see the other women not promoting teen pregnancy either, I see them saying that they are responsible and they have a life and are making one for their child. They are doing the best they can do. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:24:44 PM |
I am sure your parents don't realize how much you resent their decision to have you, perhaps you need to have a discussion with them and clear the air about your feelings about their assistance or lack of assistance with you.
I am sorry if I appear to be presenting harbored anger towards my parents. They've know since I started making dinner at 6 how I felt about it. My mother gets reminded every time she tries to take credit or make my feel sorry for how her life has turned out. I don't give her special treatment for getting high and knocked up, and then feeding me until I could do it myself. No air needs to be cleared. She is in denial and believes she is a beacon of light, no matter how many times I tell her otherwise. Good thing she has no uterus, so she cannot birth anymore children to practice her parenting skills on.
I will try to check out the site to see what the economical effect 18 -20 year olds having children has when I get the chance.
66% of teen pregnancy data comes from 18-19 year olds.
My mom's kids all went on to college. All 4 of us found our own way. Again, my mother was 19 when she started having us.
You and your 3 siblings are not your mother. Not relevant.
I don't promote teen pregnancy and as I have previously stated, my children are all virgins. Am sure that that would be considered good parenting. Teaching your children etc. again is what you can do.
I was 23 when I had my oldest. I am out of the age range specified.
I don't even know what this has to do with my post, or this thread. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:38:13 PM | Interesting note, to be added to msg #42...
As I understand, regarding sexuality and races, people with asian and latin roots are more fertil than the white caucasian/european from the anglo-saxon side yet, US hold a higher teen pregnancy rate than South Korea, Japan, China, Spain, Italy and all Latin Americans countres -with the exception of Mexico and Brazil.
And, in those countries, teenager pregnancy are mostly associated for reasons that are not significant for considerations in the US: early marriage and prevailing tendencies of traditional gender roles. What are the odds?
Regarding msg# 43... you and your line of thinking, regardless of gender, can be a reason for the pro-abortion argument.
"I will try to check out the site to see what the economical effect 18-20 years olds having children has..."
While you're at it, check for the derogatory term "welfare broadmare" about teenagers having a second child, within 24 months, living on welfare, as becoming the norm instead the exception for an extra national expenditure of around $ 9.1 billion dollars between medicare and food stamps. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:39:12 PM | How many teenagers can afford to allow their child to take part in developmental hobbies and sports?
Children with ambition can can be nurtured by letting them participate in an activity directly or indirectly relating to their goals, and they will be less likely thinking the most they can expect out of life is to be able to feed, diaper and clothe a baby. | |
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| girls having kids at the age of 18 to 20..good or bad?
Posted: 7/4/2009 10:47:38 PM | My mother raised 4 children that went onto college and marriages and to have children. She had a couple marriages and was successful in her line of work and his happily retired on her farm. So she as well as her children are all successful.
You mentioned people supporting teen pregnancy, I certainly am not. I am pointing out that my responsibility is to my children and they are virgins IE not even close to any pregnancies. Education starts at home.
I am sorry if I appear to be presenting harbored anger towards my parents. It is more than appears, you obviously have issues you still deal with. Perhaps posting on here helps? You will see not all young mothers are irresponsible or druggies. I would also think those that are aren't on POF.
Get Informed StayTeen.org : The National Campaign To Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy HELP AND ADVICE
TEEN PREGNANCY
Two-thirds of families begun by a young unmarried mother are poor. More than half of all mothers on welfare had their first child as a teenager . I don't know where I can find the dollar figure on that, but it is amazing.
Again, proactive is to talk to your kids and family about abstinence and birth control. On POF, that is about as much as you can do. | |
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