| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/3/2009 11:11:27 AM | Dave632, we so often are in line on most things.
I dated someone who liked me to just show up in her apartment unannounced before she arrived and suprise her with a Fantasy rape scenario. We did this a couple of times and were done with it. She really dug it; me, not so much. Even with safe words etc. it felt a little too wierd for my tastes. I had another gf who liked sex in public places, Parks at night, cars, unused rooms in the public library, airplanes.. This was fun...till another friend told me that we'd better quit cuz it was potentially quite a severe legal issue if caught..oops! | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/3/2009 12:30:00 PM | Thanks damas. There are fans and NOT so much fans. Then there are the weirdos who can't quite get a handle on reality even when she's asking for a fantasy. Oooo so confusing ....
Yo, touchdown. I'm an EX-cop. Three guesses which BUNDY I'm going to think of. The topic seems lost on you too. This is a RAPE fantasy thread.
I'm also VERY proud to announce to the world that I HAVE NEVER EVER EVEN ONCE watched this TV program whereby you take the name of your apparent fantasy hero dude. SO maybe that's another reason why I didn't associate YOUR Bundy with the only slightly more sinister one.
Interesting that you naturally thought of a serial killer and rapist instead of Al "Touchdown" Bundy from TV. Why is that? Do you honestly think I am going to take profile advice from someone who is fixated on raping women? You're a sick man.
Yup, fixated .... sick sick sick. Ooooo
Back to topic ....
Read this article. Interesting. Not asking to be fantasy raped but damn close and if asked to elaborate I expect the writer wood say, "YA That what I NEED."
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1203860/Im-sick-caring-sharing-lover-endless-foreplay-Rowan-Pellings-sex-advice-column.html#ixzz0N8WGn28e
sick sick sick | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/3/2009 12:41:15 PM | I have to dig deep to get to the bottom of my well of disgust for the word "rape", but to each his/her own. Right? Right. I can't fathom it, esp since I have a degree in psychology, so I understand where most rape fantasies come from. Since I know women and men who have been raped/sodomized, I just feel filthy at the thought of making it a game.
To Dave632:
Ted Bundy was not just a serial killing rapst, but a necrophile, too. Thank God he was caught in Florida where Old Sparky made Thursday a Fry-day!   | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/3/2009 1:27:34 PM | It's not as uncommon as many would believe. Many women simply describe the desire for aggressive primal sex with some form of euphemism.
Rape fantasies have nothing to do with a desire to be raped - which should be completely obvious. And if a women is sexually assaulted, who happens to also have rape fantasies, THERE IS NO CONNECTION. Please excuse the all caps - very rude.
Here is a quick and easy read on the subject:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/brainstorm/200805/why-do-women-have-erotic-rape-fantasies
Basically harmless (there will always be an exception), and I suspect it is somehow related to all of the vampire strangeness that seems to be popular recently.
Rape is a serious crime that destroy people. Rape fantasies are erotica.
It's called transferred accountability (with a smidgen of control, usually in the form of a safe word)...it is that precious opportunity for a girl to do all those kinky, wonderful, scary things without her being "a bad girl"...but they want it with the security that their lover truly loves them...as opposed to real rape done in anger.
Relax...what she's really saying is that she wants you to take control in bed...and sometimes, yes...a lot more control. Last I checked, women didn't like just stroking you for five minutes, blowing you for five minutes and then climbing on top to drain you...they WANT you to take the initiative.
Both these posts bear repetition as this is a fantasy that almost exclusively originates with females, and as such, women have enough social pressures on them to be sexual repressed and inhibited. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/3/2009 1:33:08 PM |
It's called transferred accountability (with a smidgen of control, usually in the form of a safe word)...it is that precious opportunity for a girl to do all those kinky, wonderful, scary things without her being "a bad girl"...but they want it with the security that their lover truly loves them...as opposed to real rape done in anger.
Relax...what she's really saying is that she wants you to take control in bed...and sometimes, yes...a lot more control. Last I checked, women didn't like just stroking you for five minutes, blowing you for five minutes and then climbing on top to drain you...they WANT you to take the initiative.
and who really is the one in control here ???? Ummm Ya you guessed it...the one that wants the fantasy. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/3/2009 1:41:06 PM | | If you are going to explore S&M please do it right; limits, boundaries, safe words and all. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/28/2009 4:51:13 PM | | to tell you the honest truth, i have rape fantasies because i want to be popular. i want to get raped so i can see my face and story on real-life sections of women's magazine, the local news, and so forth. that is just me and you can call me crazy if you want. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/28/2009 6:25:45 PM | Ted Bundy was a sick man who was angry for being rejected by his first girlfriend and being lied to by women in his life. Mentally he broke down and raped women as a form of revenge.
The word "rape" does not conjure up warm feelings for a lot of women, whether they've been raped or not.
I tend to agree with Erinlove in the comments she makes about having a man in your life who can dominate you sexually if desired. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 8/28/2009 11:01:32 PM | I agree that for most women with this fantasy, it's not about the rape, it's about giving up control, and being dominated.
Some just don't make the connection.
For myself...
There is nothing sexy about rape...
I'd say there's something rather steamy about taking a girl through force though. BIG difference from simply forcing a girl to do what she doesn't want to do. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 9/29/2009 10:45:36 PM | | One of my wives was really into this. Would even pick up cheap clothes that could be torn off easily without costing a fortune. If they like it and you don't mind, what's the harm? | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/3/2009 5:17:54 PM | | I know a few women that's into this kind of fantasy. Oh yeah, and they so love it,lol | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/5/2009 5:26:44 PM | Last time I helped with a rape fantasy I had a broken nose and a cracked rib
Moral of the story: Never date a black belt | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/5/2009 7:07:40 PM | The key with this is the first word: FANTASY - not the second word, RAPE. Fantasies are carried out with love and care, while real rapes happen because of anger and hate. That ought to be obvious to those who say "eewwww"...but apparently it's not.
The scene should be discussed beforehand so that the "rapist" knows exactly what the "victim" thinks is hot, vs. what might cause a freak-out. And you don't discuss it while you're nekkid and ready to play - you discuss it beforehand, when you're not already in the sack. Safeword(s) and/or signals (in case the victim is tied up and gagged) must be pre-established, and if the victim really does start to freak out, the whole thing must be stopped right away to comfort the victim. (Note that I am not being gender-specific here, as men may also have rape fantasies.)
There is a huge element of trust involved on BOTH sides. That trust needs to be well-established. If it's not, don't play until it is. | |
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| RAPE IS NOT FANTASY
Posted: 10/5/2009 8:37:38 PM | Generally speaking the english language does not have a good label for this phenomena. Sure there are women who like to live the fantasy, some far to close to the edge -- which is why we have more social problems originating from this than a lot of those women are willing to admit. "Rape" is a crime and violation, and to use the word in any other context is an insult to intelligence. If you want the fantasy ladies then find a different descriptor please.
What consenting adults who have known each other a long time choose to do with their private lives is one thing, but the bulk of this thread seems a promotion of rape as "not a big deal" mentality just doesnt wash. I have read all the psychology texts on the subject, dated women into that kind of thing and worse, and had more experience in that area then most -- but come on people it is still unethical and wrong. It also DOES put a male in a difficult position because essentially what several of you are saying it that No does not mean No. IF a woman says "rape me!" and the man says no that does not make him a wuss, it makes him a man with a backbone. Grow up FFS. Do you really need young people reading this crap and thinking it is normal or acceptable?
This entire thread reminds me of an incident I overheard when I was young and in my bar days. A young girl walked up to her friends standing next to me and just said she had been pushed into bushes and raped on her way to the bar. Her friends were horrified and immediate tried to convince her to call the police. Her response was that it was okay she didn't need to report it because he was good looking. I just had to walk away in disgust.
Now to me that is a sick reality brought on by young women brainwashed into thinking such things are normal or ok because they read stupid crap in womens magazines, on dating forums, or in trash books that promote as much more then fantasy. Small wonder so many end up hooking up with knuckle draggers that use them and beat on them every day. We no longer live in caves for a reason. I think people forget that.
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:29:32 AM | | Whoa what a topic! Thats all i'm guna say | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/6/2009 8:30:10 AM | | http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4hNaFkbZYU | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/6/2009 9:35:27 AM | If you do this make sure you have it written and signed that she agreed to this.
Lay out basic ground rules along with a safe word. Pick something strange for the word and list it in the agreement...along with duration and place, time limit and toys if any.
...just sayin | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/6/2009 9:37:50 AM | "Ted Bundy was not just a serial killing rapst, but a necrophile, too. Thank God he was caught in Florida where Old Sparky made Thursday a Fry-day!"
...thank you. Im happy to say he was caught here downtown, not far from the place where he strung up the lil girl to the tree. AND Id like to say Im very proud of our fine law enforcement and their uncanny ability to pick out odd behaviours. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/6/2009 2:27:58 PM | | I agree with love treason on this. | |
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| RAPE IS NOT FANTASY
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:05:03 PM |
...but the bulk of this thread seems a promotion of rape as "not a big deal" mentality just doesnt wash.
FFS, where are you getting that idea? No one has portrayed real rape as "not a big deal" in this thread. We are talking about the fantasy version. If you want a better term for it, then why don't you come up with one that we can all use? | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:33:27 PM | sounds like fun! I'd try anything as long as nobody gets hurt  I like her already... | |
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| another name...
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:37:19 PM | another name would be controlled rape
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Controlled%20Rape&defid=4140240 | |
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| RAPE IS NOT FANTASY
Posted: 10/6/2009 7:42:02 PM | No one has portrayed real rape as "not a big deal" in this thread. We are talking about the fantasy version.
I think you are really missing the point of my post. Making such things fantasy is a living adage of "be careful what you wish for". There is far too much real rape justified because of these kind of discussions. There are immature minds out there that read this stuff and do not distinguish so easily, just because that is what some women say that is what they want. This is nothing more then promotion of "No does not mean No" mentality.
As to what label to use for it, well it is a woman's fantasy. Perhaps you should ask women to come up with a consensus on any new name. The Japanese and a few other cultures have names for it, but I will leave that for you to research.
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| RAPE IS NOT FANTASY
Posted: 10/7/2009 8:33:51 AM | as a man Im hesitant to a scenario like that.
my most recent ex and me played games like that... but there was complete trust.
I could never do it with someone I don't really know.
there would always be this thing in the back of my head, she'd actually go to the cops. | |
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| FANTASY RAPE
Posted: 10/7/2009 9:57:03 AM | DONT DO IT
I don't care if you've known here a 1000 years, Dont do it. I cannot help but wonder how many guys are in prison because someone had a fantasy like that, lived it, then yelled rape. Walk a wide circle around anyone like that. How many women have I had that had that fantasy? ZERO | |
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