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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 7/15/2009 1:14:10 PM | | I'm messed up & probably going to hell for that but I laughed at the first one about Farrah Fawcett,lol. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 7/15/2009 8:11:39 PM | What doe Michal Jackson and caviar have in common ?
They both cum on little white crackers.
Now thats funny, I don't care who you are !  | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 7/31/2009 3:38:07 PM | | All of these joke are irrespectable. The man is dead leave him be. I cannot believe how people can be so disgraceful like this. Would any of you like it if people made sick jokes about you? Michael Jackson was still a kid himself.. A big kid at heart.. He would never hurt anyone. I can't believe you people are sick minded. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 7/31/2009 8:31:52 PM |
did you hear the latest, McDonalds is coming out with a new MJ burger just to dedicate it in memory of Michael Jackson, it has 50 year old meat in between 10 year old buns.
 omg that's wrong LOL! | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 7/31/2009 8:38:06 PM | MJ was a joke and a dangerous one.
Deserves all that can and will be said.
Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest song?
A: "Don't let your son go down on me."
Michael Jackson first wanted to look like Diana Ross, then a white person, now he wants to be A ROMAN CATHOLIC PRIEST.
Q: What's Michael Jackson's favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Little Boy Blew.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Little Boy Blue.
Little Boy Blue who?
Michael Jackson.
Q: What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?
A: "The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
Q: What did Michael Jackson say when a boy in a car mooned him going down the road?
A: "I'll be there!"
If you play thriller backwards, you can hear Michael confessing all the names of the boys he touched. That's why it is 14 minutes long.
Q: What is Michael Jackson's favorite gospel song?
A: "And then he touched me"
I just bought a new car stereo... When you shout out "Soul", it plays soul music. When you shout out "Rock", it plays rock music. Some kids ran in front of my car, and I shouted "****ing kids!", and it played Michael Jackson.
Q: How do we know Michael is guilty?
A: Several children have fingered him.
Q: How will MJ pay off his old boyfriends?
A: Liquefy some assets.
Q: Why doesn't Micheal have orgasms?
A: The big payoff comes a couple of months later.
Q: Why does Michael like children so much?
A: He knows how they feel.
Q: How did Michael get in trouble?
A: He was feeling a little Randy.
Q: How is Michael dealing with his problems?
A: He's holding his own.
Q: What psychological problem does Michael still suffer from?
A: Anal retention.
Q: How is Michael now?
A: Feeling a little crotchety.
Q: Why does Micheal Jackson like to lose foot races to little boys?
A: He likes to come in a little behind.
Q: What was the big break in the Micheal Jackson molestation case?
A: A doctor did a rectal exam of one of the boys bringing charges and found
... a white glove.
Q: What is the most difficult thing to get out of little boys underwear?
A: Michael Jackson's makeup!
Q: Why is Michael Jackson addicted to pain killers?
A: To stop him from going OW! OW! OW!
Q: Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men??
A: He thought it was a delivery service.
Q: Where does Michael Jackson go to find a date?
A: Boys 'R Us.
Q: What makes Michael Jackson so unique?
A: It's the little boy inside him.
Q: Did you know that Michael Jackson just turned 35?
A: Yeah, but he still feels like a 13 year old.
Q: What do Michael and Gaylord Perry have in common?
A: Both have held lots of wet balls in their hands.
Q: What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
A: A Michael Jackson slumber party.
Q: What's "black-white" and purple?
A: Michael Jackson's****after a slumber party with a bunch of 6 year olds.
Q: How do you know when it's bedtime at the Jackson residence?
A: When the big hand touches the little hand...
Q: What is Michael Jackson's favorite game to play at night?
A: Hide the pickle in the pajamas.
Q: What child's game does Michael NOT allow to be played at his Neverland ranch?
A: Got your nose! Put it back!
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common?
A: They both like a little crack now and then.
Q: Why did Michael Jackson Check into the Betty Ford clinic?
A: To get over his 11 year crack habit.
Q: Why does Michael really need to go to rehab?
A: He's a crack addict.
Q: What did Michael Jackson say when he got back to Neverland Ranch from drug rehab?
A: You know, I feel like a new boy!
Q: Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore?
A: He's tired of all the cracks.
Q: What's the first problem the Michael's child will have in life?
A: Figuring out which parent is his mother.
Q: What happens when Michael talks about sex?
A: It's all very tongue in cheek.
Q: What's sex like for Michael?
A: Child's Play.
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a refrigerator?
A: A fridge doesn't toot after you take your meat out of it!
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a microwave?
A: A microwave won't brown your meat!
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Casper?
A: One is pale and scares kids and the other is a friendly ghost.
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a ghost?
A: One is completely white and has a scary face. The other is a supernatural being.
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Richard Nixon?
A: One was a consummate ***hole, the other a consummated ***hole.
Q: What famous celebrity had the most children over the last 10 years?
A: Michael Jackson.
Q: Why does Michael Jackson arrange for private shopping?
A: So his guests won't be accompanied by guardians!
Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book?
A: It's called "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing".
Q: What will they call Michael's new TV series?
A: Anus and Andy.
Q: Why has Michael been appearing on children's shows lately?
A: He has a lot to plug.
Q: Why was Michael Jackson late for the circus?
A: He couldn't get the stains out of his clown suit.
Q: Did you hear that Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding have decided to begin training racehorses together?
A: Yeah, she's gonna do all the handicapping and he's gonna ride all the three-year-olds!
Q: What do second place race horses and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They both come in a little behind.
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Willie Shoemaker have in common?
A: Both ride 4 year olds.
Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a racing jockey?
A: A jockey can mount three year olds legally.
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and greyhound racing?
A: The greyhounds wait for the hares to come out.
Q: What's the difference between Richard Pryor and Michael Jackson?
A: Richard Pryor got burnt on coke, Michael Jackson got burnt on Pepsi!
Q: Why's Michael cutting down on public appearances?
A: He wants to spend more time with the kids.
Q: Who's happy when Michael Jackson gets a boy to stay over?
A: Bubbles.
Q: Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
A: He saw someone blowing bubbles and thought he'd join in.
Q: Heard about Michael Jackson's new songs?
A: I'm forever blowing bubbles!
Q: Why is Michael Jackson's album new entitled "Bad"?
A: Because he couldn't spell "Pathetic".
Q: Why was Michael Jackson grounded?
A: He was "Bad".
Q: What did Michael Jackson do when his hair caught on fire?
A: He "Beat-it!"
Q: Where does Michael Jackson write his songs for the kids?
A: In his tanning salon.
Q: How do you neuter Michael Jackson?
A: Give him spiked gloves and tell him to sing a song.
Q: What do any of the Mets have in common with Michael Jackson?
A: They all wear one glove for no apparent reason.
Q: Where is Michael Jackson's other glove?
A: In Brooke Shields' pants.
Q: What would you call Michael Jackson if he slept with another 20 or 30 young boys?
A: Monsigneur.
Q: How will they ensure that Michael gets a thorough body search?
A: Hire a Catholic priest to do it.
Q: What do Michael and Catholic school nuns have in common?
A: Both are a pain in the ass to kids.
Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a proctologist?
A: A proctologist doesn't pay for the ***holes he's poked around in.
Q: Why did Pepsi sign up Michael Jackson for their ads?
A: Because he likes the taste of a new generation.
Q: Why did Pepsi fire Michael Jackson?
A: Because he was caught sucking on a Squirt!!
Q: Why did Michael Jackson fail to renew his contract with Pepsi?
A: Because he found out that the main ingredient was Bubbles!
Q: Why did Michael Jackson put cheese on his willy?
A: Because kids will do anything for the taste of Dairy Lea!
Q: What do Michael Jackson and broccoli have in common?
A: Both are force fed to little boys.
Q: Did you hear about Michael Jackson marrying Lisa-Marie Presley?
A: If Elvis were dead, he'd turn over in his grave.
Q: What did Elvis say after seeing Michael and Lisa Marie on television?
A: "Boy, that's a relief. I though she married a black guy!"
Q: What did Lisa Marie Presley say to Michael Jackson when he popped her
the question?
A: "Yes, I'll marry you. But promise me one thing... NO KIDS!"
Q: What was Michael Jackson thinking about on his wedding night?
A: Hmmm, now Lisa-Marie can give me a little boy of my own. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 8/1/2009 1:35:25 AM | All these are really funny, and for those people that are messaging sayin you really shouldnt do this, you didnt have to read this forum. If you havnt noticed most jokes are aiming towards people. And I thought one of the little boys came on tv and said his dad made him do it.So that makes him free game, everyone was sending out jokes about Obama when he was elected, so no difference there.Famous people get picked on all the time.
I heard Michael Jackson wasputting his funds towards all boy schools and said the only thing he wanted he asked was a little hard labor and to sign a note of confidentiality. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 8/1/2009 2:34:53 PM | | Casper the friendly ghost was molested last night. Police are at a loss as to how it happened or who may have done it. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 8/19/2009 9:14:18 AM | A friend of mine was dismayed at my nonschalant-ness to MJ's passing....
I said 'Yeah, OK...he was a great dancer, and a sparkling entertainer....
he was _Also_ a Petophile...!!'
She said 'He was never Convicted!'
I was so shocked, that the definitive response completely escaped me...... :
****
'Yeah!.....neither was O.J. ....!!!!' | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 8/20/2009 1:14:55 AM |
Two paramedics show up at MJ's ranch in response to the 911 call.
The first paramedic asks, "So - what should we try first?"
The second replies, "Heck I dunno ... how about that ferris wheel?"
That is awsome lol. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 8/20/2009 9:39:17 AM | michael jackson hasn't been this stiff since mccauley culkin came to stay for the weekend.
celebrity friends are rallying round the jackson family: david blane has promised to spend 48 hours in the coffin with michael and madonna has said if nobody wants the kids then she'll take them. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 8/21/2009 9:47:52 AM | See what you did HELPIMSTUCK
wwIII
First the Court never proved michael didnt touch him that way.
Second the Kid admitted it
Third The kid went to his house again after the first so called case why???
Simple they just wanted to get money of out mike
and they succedded
Mike never touched that kid end of story
p.s. those were funny jokes tho | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 10/23/2009 4:07:47 PM | I just bought a new state-of-the-art Sony car stereo!
When you shout out "Soul", it plays soul music.
When you shout out "Rock", it plays rock music.
Some kids ran in front of my car this morning and I shouted
"fcuking kids" and it played Michael Jackson. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 10/24/2009 4:45:41 AM | Oh boy,,, I am so glad they found that little boy in the baloon,, for a while I thought Micheal Jackson had ordered out from heaven !!!!
(sent to me from my son) | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 10/27/2009 12:54:53 AM | You guys can all say what you want about Michael Jackson but he was an ok guy...
Apparently he was a really good driver too... people who saw him said he always obeyed the speed limit and really slowed down when in school zones...  | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 10/27/2009 12:58:47 AM | babybyebye : At the autopsy they found children’s underwear strapped to Michael Jackson’s upper arm. According to his doctors it is just a patch, he’s been trying to quit for a while.
Apparently this is true... a shame the poor guy never beat his addiction...
Apparently his habit started when he volunteered to work with the Boy Scouts of America and by the time he died he was up to two 'packs' a day!
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 11/2/2009 2:18:16 PM | | You wanna know what the biggest Michael Jackson joke is? The United States goverment! Every child in America was taught to obey the law in school and it doesn't matter if someone is rich, famous or even the president, these laws apply to EVERYONE! Turns out that was a load of bull! Laws pertaining to standards of conduct for citizens in the U.S.A. have major loopholes if you're rich and popular enough. I wonder if I'll ever be able to listen to another MJ song without being reminded how the law only applies to working class mutts like me. | |
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| the best michael jackson joke
Posted: 11/5/2009 8:05:23 AM | Reading this forum, doesnt seem to me that mj is the sick one
i dont really care whats said about the tosser hes dead and gone and you cant hurt him,
but if kids were abused (a big if) why the hell are you all bringing children into it?
Your all saying hes guilty , so then that means Children DID suffer? so then you all go ahead and try to qualify yourselves in talking about rape and abuse
and saying oh but we're funny cos its a joke.
wtf???
A joke is at the expense of others yes, (if it is humour it is) and it is funny!
Leave the kids out of it
Ive never seen so many twits in one room
orgasminator?
pfft i rest my case | |
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Is his family keeping him around as some sort of memento/souvenir ... awaiting the next available taxidermist to have him stuffed for the living room trophy?? 
They're all whackos.
