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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 1:26:35 PM | This whole "favorites" thing really annoys the shit out of me.
The amount of times a woman is "favorited" means absolutely JACK SHIT. And I'm sick of people assuming things about me because of the amount of people that have favorited me. I have NEVER CONTACTED about 99% of these people who have favorited me. I cannot control who decides to favorite me AT ALL. That is NOT UNDER MY CONTROL. That's why it annoys me when people make assumptions based off of who has favorited ME. As if I told them to add me to their favorites list... | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 2:59:15 PM | From reading this forum, I have learned that a lot of people haven't learned much: they continue to judge all women and all men by the actions of some.
I have learned to not take myself, others, and online dating seriously. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 3:33:19 PM | I've learned that, dispite what people say, physical features remain the most important when attracting a mate.
The people who have been favorited by 50+ people are all very attractive people. Some people seem to be favorited because they have a desireable personality. But it has much less pull than physicality. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 3:40:23 PM | 1) I've learned that there are a lot of good people in the world, but not many who are a good match for me!
2) The sea is big. There are many fishies.
3) It's not so bad being single after all.
4) Who needs a man when I have the forums, my cup of coffee, my laptop, and a my cat? | |
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| Tips Posted: 7/8/2009 4:51:55 PM | Casually make any first date only one hour Don't travel too far Try to relax Don't expect anything at all. Don't drink alcohol Keep positive. Its a learning experience. | |
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| Tips Posted: 7/8/2009 5:04:02 PM | OUT THE DOOR-SAME STORY -PROVEN & AS TOLD BY A WOMAN AS WELL. 'WOMEN OF INTEREST' ARE AFRAID TO RISK AGAIN AND THEY WONDER WHY/WHERE GOOD MEN ARE. GOOD MEN GAVE UP CUZ YOU'ALL DID LONG AGO. SO DOTE ON YOUR KIDS, JOB, GARDEN, JOB, HORSE, THE WEEDS IN BACK, 2 CATS & A DOG, OR WHATEVER THE HELL DOESN'T INVOLVE RISK. YUPPER--"WANT HONEST MAN, GOOD MAN, NO PSYCHOS, ABLE TO HANDLE BUT NOT CONTROL, WHERE ARE THE, NO CHEATERS, WANTED.., KINDA LIKE?: GOT SOME QCEANFRONT FOOTAGE FOR SALE HERE IN SD BEARS DON'T DEFECATE IN WOODS SUN GOING DOWN IN THE EAST LOOK UP IN THE SKY--"IT'S A DEAD BIRD"
BUT YOU SAY YOU'RE LOOKING ......For: WHITE KNIGHTS-KING ARTHUR-FREUD-THE BOOGIE MAN-UTOPIA-PRINCE CHARMING & FROGS.
HEARD IT ALL NOW--ALL THE FAIRYTALES OF LITTLE GIRLS THAT GREW UP EXPECTING A PERFECT WORLD, SAW THAT IT WASN'T, SO THEY CRAWLED INTO AN OCEANSHELL TO ESCAPE LIFE'S STORMS, AND ECHO 'BIG FISH STORIES' OVER THE LAND. BUT EVENTUALLY THEY FORGOT HOW TO WALK AGAIN, AND REMAINED TRAPPED ALONE FOREVER. Why bother? Go away-stay in your shell. WHY can't they? Hmmm-they know why....and I know why.
BUT HEY---HERE'S THE!!! TOP RATED GUY, MASTERS DEGREE-- "am a very outdoor person, from swimming, snow sports, soccer and gym. I love to travel and hope to see as much of the world as I possibly can. I hope to find someone that will treat me as good as I treat them. (WHAT-ICE CREAM--FROM 'THE BOOK, BUD)My favorite quote is "Live Everyday Like It Is Your Last" and I hope to find someone that I can l having fun. I am a goal oriented person who loves to have fun and relax while enjoying the person in my lifes company." (NOW THAT MADE SENSE-ENJOYING THE PERSON IN MY LIFES COMPANY---WHAT?--AN EMPLOYEE IN HIS BUSINESS?-HOW 'BOUT--I HOPE TO FIND THAT SPECIAL LADY TO SHARE THE REST OF 'OUR' LIVES WITH--BETTER OR WORSE--THAT'S THE DEAL--IF!! HE REALLY FELT THAT WAY--HE READ A BOOK--AND POORLY REGURGITATED A FEW LINES) The most important thing in my life is my family.(HELL YA--IN BOOK, BUD)
HUG THE THRONG FOR THIS GOOD JEWISH BOY DUMB AS A ROCK, BUT CAN READ A LITTLE-MASTER'S DEGREE? OF WHAT? FISHING? OH--HE'S A MASTER-BAITOR. HMM--OH-NOW I SEE WHY LADIES LIKE HIM)--NO SH*T I'M GONE--THIS SH*T FLOATS HERE? YOU WOMEN BUY THIS PHONY CRAP. n0-not jealous, real world speaks for itself. Dissappointed in the gullibility and 'hiding' & 'rudeness' factors involved on-line. No mas. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 5:54:55 PM | That for some reason most guys seem to think they're incerdibly hot and that ALL women want them regardless of how THEY look and expect women to look like they stepped out of some Victoria's Secret catalog...Think: Fat guy in a vehicle with a bumper sticker that says "no fat chicks"....get real people
Oh, and don't bother lying because eventually the truth will come out and someone ends up getting hurt, regardless of you not caring, the other person does have a heart and has feelings. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 6:48:23 PM | Chris 755:
NONE of the people on my favorites list are "Dates". They are all people I follow here on the forums. OR someone I'm thinking about messaging.
*I* can't control who puts me on their list...but it doesn't seem to be an issue because they are so far only people who seem to follow me on the forums... | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 8:10:51 PM | Would just like to know where all of the male competition on these sites is coming from.
And why there are so many more males per female than vice versa?
I am out of a 24-year marriage, age 60, very athletic, in excellent condition, have been on the site since March, and my target age is 48 to 58. I am not looking for 35- year- old knock-outs.
Regardless, it seems all of the decent looking women in the above age range have scads of men to choose from.
I know some of them have numerous avenues they use to find men besides the online dating sites, such as dancing.
Lately my emails with women have been coming to screeching halts, the women actually disappear on me. I just had two proposed meets this week rebuffed with vague excuses given regarding plans to travel.
Another woman took offense at a joke I made and will not talk with me any longer, instead of just giving me a chance to explain the circumstances or the intent.
Seems going for table stakes immediately is the name of the game now. There just seems to be tremendous intolerance for a man making the slightest error, and I think that's because there's a line of men behind me waiting their turn. It wouldn't be so if the ratios were reversed.
All the time I have spent communicating with these women plus the ones who just drop off the face of the earth after we've been communicating for awhile, has gone down the drain.
Obviously the women had what they thought were better offers from other guys. But who are all these men targeting all of the older woman, and what do the older women think they are getting from these guys, that they have decided they can't get, or don't want, from me?
After four months of rounds of emails, and meeting after meeting with literally dozens of women, I am still without anyone who is interested in getting to know me, or interested in trying to be an "us".
By the way, most of my meets have been with women over 50. I have not seen anyone younger.
Just had no idea meeting a compatible woman in an older age range was going to be such a harrowing and unproductive experience.
That's my take for what it's worth. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 8:28:32 PM | Seems as if the men I have met online are either not available (emotionally, geographically, or literally), they are either just looking for no strings sex and I am not, they want to meet many women once and are not looking to really date any one person, or they have situations in their lives that need to be taken care of before they can really date me, but expect me to wait around for them since they know we are a match but they have to get it together, or they are impotent and are sure if a woman is young and hot looking she will be able to turn him on without him having to use Viagra (his words, not mine), so if he cannot find a young, hot woman he will meet me, but can I pay for the Viagra? I am an average/cute looking middle aged teacher, but am so glad I have enough self esteem to NOT date these type of men..... Where are the men who want to meet and date normal, average, employed sane women? | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 8:29:22 PM |
girotitalia-Another woman took offense at a joke I made and will not talk with me any longer, instead of just giving me a chance to explain the circumstances or the intent.
You gotta watch that. I'm big on "tasteful sarcasm" and dry humor. If they don't get your humor, you're not a good match..however, its possible to lay it on too thick, and too fast if you're eager to make a "good impression".
I had a 2+ week thing with a great gal from this site. Chemistry was smoking hot..we got off to a great start. She said I made her laugh all day long..so I hit her with even more sarcastic dry humor and 2 or 3 times it completely backfired. She didn't get it..she got upset by it..sure she may have over reacted and that alone probably wasn't the dealbreaker but it certainly didn't help. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 8:56:58 PM | | What have I learned from online dating......smiles.....Met a wonderful man that I went to High School with.....we are still friends....I have received several emails....always answer nicely...*S*.........If I am not interested, will say so, but will try not to hurt you....just being honest...... | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 9:03:26 PM | idoc steve Sorry to hear of your loss. Still think there's too many fish in this sea. And they're predominantly males. Women are having a field day. Wonder if the state of dating in America is a Russian psy-ops program designed to demoralize American males. They've done stuff like this before. Like the whole hippie movement of the sixties, which was conclusively proven to have been conceived by the politburo and implemented by the KGB. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 9:22:17 PM | ^^^^ you seem to think that "people dissapearing" or not keeping dates, or avoiding your calls for stupid reasons is a "woman" thing.... well, let me tell you it certainly is not!
I have had the same things happen to me time and time again. It doesn't matter if they say you are the most beautiful thing, the perfect person for them bla bla bla.... its all BS! People have said all these things to me and it was all lies. People have broken dates with, some have dated me and fled. Why? I don't know. Maybe its just a wierd quirk found mostly with online dating. I don't know and have not figured it out yet. Usually (well mostly 99.9% of the time) if I like someone ... I like them period. I don't change after 1 - 2 - 3 dates and decide I never want to see them again or talk again. Some people will just end up being a friend and that's okay too.... but this business of fading away and never speaking again is crazy to me. People just don't have human compassion anymore I've found. , so it's not just something women do to men, it goes both ways and ALL ages.
Hang in there... hopefully it will get better. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 9:51:14 PM | | Some women might be having a field day, most of us do not seem to be. I might get 3 emails in a 6 month time period, and 2 of them are men looking for a friend with benefits and the other one lives on another Continent. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 10:52:45 PM | I'm in the same boat as you, 20 years marriage to a high school sweet heart, now divorced. I'm happy to be single. Been on dating sites for 2 1/2 years and still haven’t found the ONE.
Anyway, just be patient, don't settle just because. Follow your instinct because it's usually is correct. Most or majority of the profile on dating sites are fake/made up with lies. There are many, many married men on here also so be aware of that so you won't be hurt later on.
Good luck with your search. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/8/2009 11:06:25 PM | There are a lot of hot, intelligent, charming single men out there... most of them have issues beyond any therapist's repair.
Never meet anyone without seeing at least 3 photos first.
No one is ever who their profile claims they are.
More people than I'd ever dreamt are socially inept.
Corollary to the above...more people than I'd ever dreamt have no idea how crucial punctuations, capitalizations & correct spelling are at conveying coherent thoughts...
My cat has more personality than most people.
I'm glad POF is free.
Sleepless in Seattle was JUST A MOVIE... | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/9/2009 12:30:36 AM | Maybe they would walk on a long beach if they had one?.........Or, perhaps what they really need isn't a partner, but a long beach. People are all strange! self included. | |
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| What lessons have you learned from online dating? Posted: 7/9/2009 1:01:04 AM | I love women! I really do. most of my friends are women. However , I'm suspicious of usernames such "PrincessKate", "Earthgoddess", "Angel4U" etc. Seems they're only going to respond to "GreekGod" and his mates, which is a good thing! 'cause when those two egos collide, it'll get ugly fast! Women can be (often I've found) bigger "players" than men.
Ahhh, what am i doing? It's all bollocks! | |
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